Chapter 24
Nash
I wince as I jerk awake. The burn in my side makes me realize that me sleeping out here is simply a false show of protection. If someone really wanted to test my limits, they’d know very quickly that I’m not capable of much right now.
I reach for the ache in my neck which only serves to pull at the injuries in my side. I’m a fucking mess right now.
Angel turns in my direction. The unimpressed look in his eyes makes me wonder if the man is going to turn against me.
He’s set up jobs for me in the past, but we’re not friends.
I learned long ago to never trust anyone.
Despite our frequent interactions, trusting him fully is not something I’ve ever considered, despite the man risking his own life to pull me out of Cortez’s compound.
“What the fuck?” I snap when he pulls his hotel room door closed all the way.
“I have to get back to Lauren and the baby,” he says as he steps closer.
“Let me wake Ayla up.”
“No,” he snaps, making my eyes jerk up to him before I can even get my feet under myself. “Three people crossing at the same time would draw too much attention.”
“You got another plan?”
“I told you that I could get you close, but I couldn’t guarantee that I could get you across. This is what that looks like.”
“It looks like you sneaking out in the middle of the night?”
He tilts his head as if he doesn’t understand why I’d be upset, and I have to clench my fucking jaw to keep from saying more.
This man owes me exactly nothing. If anyone owes the other, it’s me owing him for the rescue.
“I know you’re capable of getting across undetected, but I also know it would be impossible for her to do it.”
I hear the truth in his words. I was worried about exactly that before we found out about the extra patrols along this part of the border into Texas.
“You’re more than welcome to join me.”
I see the challenge in his eyes. He won’t stop me from going with him, but it means leaving her behind. He wants me to choose crossing with him tonight.
“Lauren says that border patrol will move on in a few days. If you’re going to risk bringing her across, you should wait. I suggest dropping her ass off at the embassy first thing in the morning.”
“And risk Cortez having men on the inside?” I shake my head, rejecting the suggestion immediately.
“Do what you want, but that woman isn’t my fucking problem. I’m not going to spend another minute without Lauren and my baby.”
“You don’t want to get vengeance?” I challenge, as he turns to walk away.
Angel spins on his heels, his agility proving that he’s in fighting form, the opposite of me right now.
“We’ll seek vengeance,” he promises, including me in his plan. “I won’t stop until Raul Cortez is dead. But sticking around for her isn’t going to happen.”
He isn’t exactly being mean about it. He hasn’t given his opinion verbally on Ayla even though it’s very clear in his choices how he feels about her.
“Here,” he says, reaching into his pocket, pulling out another wad of cash. “Take this.”
I want to keep my hands at my sides but being stubborn right now isn’t smart. Pride, in a situation like this, can get you killed.
He presses the money and the key to room 207 into my outstretched hand.
“The rooms are booked for two days.”
“You’ll take this out of my next job?” I ask, already hating the obligation to the man.
He shakes his head. “Gave it some thought. Your job was to infiltrate the Cortez cartel. I would’ve preferred for you to be on the opposite side from what you actually were, but you did it, nonetheless.
This is part of your payment for that job.
Lauren will get you the rest once you get back to town. ”
“We didn’t catch him,” I argue.
“Not catching Cortez was my failure, not yours,” he says before walking away.
I shove the money into my pocket, knowing having it out in the open will only bring unwanted attention.
I debate heading into the room he just abandoned, but I doubt Ayla’s fear has subsided any, even with me out here.
I have no idea how many people were able to walk by me without me waking, and that makes it dangerous for both of us.
I lift my hand, banging on the door with my fist.
“Nash?” she asks from the other side of the door.
It’s smart of her not to just jerk the door open but waiting out here longer annoys the absolute shit out of me.
“Open the door,” I hiss.
“What’s going on?”
“I’m not going to explain shit through the fucking door, Ayla. Open.”
I stand in silence, no doubt her on the other side, trying to decide if opening the door is in her best interest. It takes a solid minute and a half before the echo of the lock flipping back fills my ears. I don’t shove open the door but rather allow her to open it.
She backs away, terror filling her pretty features when I step inside and close the door behind me.
I make sure to reengage the lock. Her eyes widen, and I hate that she knows I could hurt her if I wanted to.
I’ve done nothing to calm that fear in her.
Explaining that I did the things I did to protect her doesn’t negate the fact that I did them in the first place.
I want to call her out on the incongruity of her choices.
She chose to leave the safety of the hotel room with Cerberus.
She asked to come with me. I never encouraged her to step outside of the safety their cocoon offered.
It’s very possible she picked what she thought was the lesser of two evils, and I hate thinking that she may consider me one of the bad things in her life that she’ll eventually want to get away from.
“Angel left,” I tell her.
She settles just a fraction, making me realize that some of her fear stemmed from him.
“We have a couple of options. We can head toward the border and take our chances with the patrols, or we can wait a few days until they move upriver and try to cross then.” I release a sigh when she doesn’t speak, knowing there’s a third option. “Or I can take you to the embassy.”
With this suggestion, she shakes her head almost violently, her blond hair swishing, a strand of it getting stuck to her bottom lip. I do my best not to let my gaze drop to it clinging to her, but I lose the battle almost as quickly as I try to fight it.
“We can wait,” she says. “If you don’t mind.”
“I’m not exactly a hundred percent. I don’t think taking the chance right now is very smart,” I say, instead of assuring her that waiting is no problem.
I want to get home as much as she does, I’m sure.
“Will you stay with me?” I can see the questions in her eyes, and I know she isn’t asking about being in close proximity until we cross. She’s asking if I’ll literally stay in this room.
It has to take a lot from her, but it tells me that she sees me as some form of protection rather than just being someone capable of hurting her again.
“Is that what you want?” I ask, needing to make sure.
“I don’t want to be alone,” she answers. It’s not exactly the assurance I was looking for, but I know it’s going to be the best I’m going to get out of her right now.
“I’m not sleeping on the fucking ground outside anymore,” I tell her as I inch toward the full-sized bed closest to the door.
I empty my pockets on the bedside table, needing sleep more than I have the ability to worry about her taking the cash and disappearing.
Honestly, if she made that choice, it would make things ten times easier.
Not having to worry about her safe crossing means I could be home within a couple of hours of waking up.
She doesn’t open her mouth to argue when I flop face-first on the bed, the injuries on my side screaming out in pain.
A mustiness that threatens to make my stomach turn fills my nose, but the exhaustion I’m feeling wins out against getting back off the bed.
It’s better than the accommodation that Cortez and his men provided.
Which is saying a lot because this place is an utter shithole.
It’s also a little off the beaten path, filled by people who are too concerned with their own problems to worry about what other people are doing.
I turn my head at the sound of the bed springs on the other bed. Ayla situates herself with her back to the headboard, her eyes locked on me. She could very easily kill me in my sleep, but it doesn’t stop my eyes from closing and sleep taking over.
Death could possibly be easier to deal with than the shit I’ve already experienced in life. As I drift to sleep, I still haven’t decided which is a better option—living or dying…