Chapter Forty
Sutton
My heart is stuck in my throat, beating frantically as I stand here, waiting for the man I love to turn around. Tears well in my eyes. There’s an overwhelming mixture of hurt, joy, and fear swirling in my chest.
He hasn’t taken his eyes off me all night and it’s been a testament to my strength—or my desire to inflict pain on myself—that I haven’t run into his arms.
But he hadn’t earned that from me.
Not yet.
Now, though… my throat is so thick I can barely swallow around the emotion. I couldn’t avoid overhearing his speech, and by the whispered murmurs of the people closest to us, I imagine everyone else heard it too.
My heart broke from his words, the pained admissions he made about who he is as a sports agent. I wonder when he became that man, the one who put money above the passion of representing the men and women giving their all on the field.
I know him well enough to know he wasn’t always that way, that beneath it all, Max Cruz is a man whose bottom line is the sport, not the dollar.
But somewhere along the journey he lost that.
I stare at his back, the way his tuxedo jacket pulls taut across his strong muscles, and it’s impossible not to remember the way that skin looks, the smooth curves of each ridge and defined muscle as they jump beneath my touch.
Those goddamn freckles on his side.
My fingers twitch, aching to trace them again.
I came here intent on ignoring him, perhaps even telling him off if given the chance, but Mo is right. As much as I blame him for what happened, I’m not entirely innocent.
And the way he spoke of me to Emerson just now…
My god, he’s always seen me, hasn’t he?
I breathe deeply, waiting. Seconds tick by with each pounding beat of my heart, but he still doesn’t turn around.
“Max,” I finally growl.
His shoulders rise and fall, shaking on his deep breath.
When he finally turns around, his eyes are wet as they meet mine.
A sob slips past my lips, but I quickly cover my mouth. Tears rush down my cheeks.
He’s absolutely beautiful.
And he’s hurting.
So much fucking pain caused by this one man, but I’m not the only who has suffered.
“Why did you turn him down?” he asks. “You needed him. Hart Strategic needed him.” His eyes search mine as he struggles to make sense of what Emerson just told him.
I open my mouth, then pause. How do I explain that when he broke my heart, everything else shattered as well? The lies I’d been telling myself about what made me happy… the facade of trying to save a company I no longer loved…
Finally, I shrug, laughing as I admit, “I don’t want it anymore.”
Max’s brows pull down and he takes a step closer. “What? I don’t understand.”
I suck in a breath, at once thrown completely off balance by him and equally desperate to sink into his arms. “It doesn’t spark joy?”
Max barks out a laugh and a tear streaks down his cheek. “What?”
I raise my hands in surrender. “I tried to make it work, I just…” I shrug.
“I’m releasing my clients from their contracts at the end of the year.
Hart Strategic Management will be closed, and I’ll move on with my life knowing I did what I could in honor of my father.
” I shake my head sadly. “But I can’t give up on me for him anymore, you know?
I’ve spent almost forty years doing what I thought would make him happy.
” I scoff as I realize, “At the sake of my own happiness.”
Max nods, and I watch his thick throat work on a swallow. “What will you do?”
I laugh, the sound sharp and a bit too loud. Stepping closer, I lower my voice. “I think I might go into law.”
Max’s eyes widen. “Really? That’s…” He pauses and I find myself holding my breath.
Will he encourage me? Tell me I’m crazy?
Suddenly I have to know. His opinion should mean nothing…
Yet, it’s everything.
“You’ll make an incredible lawyer, Ms. Hart.”
My gasp is audible. Somehow, even after weeks apart, he still knows exactly what I need to hear.
“I’ve missed you somethin’ fierce,” he admits. “I’m so sorry for what I did, Sutton. I’ll never forgive myself for hurting you.”
“Hey.” I step forward, reaching up to cup his face in my palm. “I forgive you.”
His eyes well with more tears as he searches my face. “What?”
“You heard me.”
Max’s jaw ticks as he holds my gaze. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness, darlin’—”
“Max, you silly idiot.” I shake my head. “You deserve everything.”
He tries to shake his head, but I hold him firmly with both hands. “I’m done punishing you, Max.” I search his gaze. “I’m done punishing myself. The truth is, deep down, I knew it was you. It’s always been you.”
His eyes close and another tear drops down, catching on my fingertips.
“I love you, Max.” Pushing up onto my tiptoes, I whisper against his lips, “Kiss me… Sir.”
His eyes flare with heat and he’s quick to wrap his arms around me as his lips crash into mine.
My heart soars, breaking free of my chest in search of the only place it belongs—with his.
Around us, people break into applause and my cheeks heat from embarrassment but he doesn’t give me room to pull away.
And honestly, I’m so tired of pulling away from this man.