Chapter 28 – Gavin
28
As Long as it’s Not Liver
Gavin
“I SWEAR TO God.” Leo bends at the waist, sucking in air as he tries to catch his breath. “I don’t know what you’ve been eating, but you’ve got to stop.”
I grin in spite of myself. I can’t help it. “You don’t want to know what I’ve been eating.” And I’m not telling him. Not yet. Not when he’s so clearly hanging on by a thread.
“It’s liver, isn’t it?” Leo grimaces as he straightens, face slanting toward the clear sky. “I knew it would be fucking liver.”
I tip back a water bottle, squirting a steady stream into my mouth, trying to replace some of what I’ve sweat out over the past couple of hours. After swallowing down as much as I’m comfortable putting in my stomach, I pass it off to my friend. “Maybe you should try relaxing. You’ve been wound up for weeks now. That shit would wear anyone out.”
Leo takes the bottle. “I can’t help it.” He downs a quick drink. “You don’t know what it’s like worrying about what could happen every time she leaves the house.” He pours more water into his open mouth, then wipes the sweat off his face with the hem of his shirt. “It’s killing me that I have to leave her for the weekend.”
I can see the worry etched on his face. The tension bunching his shoulders and clenching his teeth. “You’ve got to try to relax, man. You’re going to drive yourself crazy.”
Leo shakes his head, huffing out an odd sounding laugh. “I can’t relax.” He meets my gaze. “I fucking love her.”
The admission stuns me. “What?”
“I love her.” Leo repeats himself, sounding even more convicted than he did the first time. “And before you try to tell me it’s too soon, it’s not.”
Was I going to try to tell him that? I’ve spent a lot of time over the past month attempting to convince him he needs to give Maddie the space to deal with what she’s facing, but I knew he’d never do it. I guess on some level I expected this. Recognized he was already too far gone to turn back.
And I understand. Completely.
But it puts a wrench in my plan to tell him about me and Alexis. Pushes back that timeline indefinitely. I know how Leo would have reacted before, but now? Now finding out his sister’s sleeping in my bed almost every night might make him lose his shit. And he doesn’t have much to spare.
“Do you think she loves you back?”
Leo’s brows lift, like he hasn’t considered the possibility. After a few beats he slowly nods. “I think she does.”
I hope like hell he’s right, but I’m not sure it matters either way. Even if Maddie broke up with him tomorrow, he would take care of her. Still look out for her. Still do whatever he could to keep her safe.
It’s one of many reasons Leo’s been my best friend since the day we met. His feelings are what they are. They don’t change based on circumstance. Or someone else’s opinions or actions.
I’ve always hoped he’d rub off on me. That I wouldn’t spend my whole life being reactive. Wouldn’t allow someone else to dictate my thoughts and emotions. But I’m pretty sure that’s not how that works.
I drop a hand onto his shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “Then I’m glad she found you. No one in this world will take care of her the way you will.”
Leo’s mouth tips up in a half smile. “I’m glad someone’s finally on my side.”
Guilt stabs my gut. Guilt that I’ve made him feel unsupported and alone. Guilt that he’s thought everyone was against him.
And guilt that I’ve had his sister under me every night for the past two weeks and he has no fucking idea.
The sharp trill of a whistle signifies the end of our break and sends us going our separate ways for the rest of the morning.
Like always, I’m fucking spent when practice is over, and I drag my ass into the showers to wash away the sweat and dirt. I come out to find Owen giving Leo shit.
“You’re telling me you can’t even come out for an hour?” Owen shakes his head, running one hand over his buzzed scalp. “You’re fucking pussy-whipped, man.”
Leo grabs his bag. “Yup.” He slings the duffel over one shoulder, giving Owen a smirk. “And you’re a jealous asshat.”
Normally, any mention of jealousy sends me into a spiral, reminding me of everything I can never have. Of what I’ll become if I’m not careful.
And today is no exception.
The panic of fucking shit up with Alexis starts twisting my gut almost instantly, sloshing around the water I chugged before my shower.
“Jealous of being locked down?” Owen shakes his head. “No fucking way.” His lip curls. “I’m not done playing the pitch.” He shoots me a grin, wiggling his brows. “You see what I did there?”
“You’re a fucking wordsmith,” I deadpan as I pull on my clothes, trying to look unhurried even though I’m itching to get out of here so I can see Alexis. Talk to her. Hear about her day then occupy her night. Prove to myself I can do this. That I’m better than my old man.
Better than the old me.
Owen turns his attention from Leo, focusing on where I stand. “What about you? You up for a little drinky drinky?”
“Not tonight.” I wrestle my T-shirt over my still damp skin. “I’ve got to take care of my iguana.”
Owen’s nose wrinkles. “Is that code for jacking off? Because if it is, then you should definitely come out and find someone else to handle that shit for you.”
I finish dressing and shove both feet into my runners. “And how’s that working out for you?”
Owen grins. “Not well.”
That’s the thing with Owen. He doesn’t take much outside of rugby seriously. That includes himself. “Then one more night of taking matters into your own hand won’t kill you.”
My winger buddy’s face lights up. “Does that mean you’ll come out tomorrow?”
I glance at Leo’s retreating figure. He’s sure as shit not gonna go out, and I know Owen’s not going to shut up until he gets what he wants. “Sure. I’ll go out tomorrow.”
I don’t plan to stay out, but I didn’t really stay out even before Alexis. I always managed to find a reason—a pretty one—to skip out early. So no one will be surprised if I do it again.
Hell, they might even celebrate it. They’ve all been giving me shit about my sudden and lingering celibacy. I don’t have any intention of telling them that streak has ended.
Like Leo said, my personal life is no one’s business.
“I knew you wouldn’t let me down.” Owen slaps me on the shoulder. “I’m gonna go find us some company.”
I shake my head as he walks away, hoping Alexis won’t give me too much shit over making plans for tomorrow. Going out isn’t her favorite thing. She hates the crowds and the noise and the general overstimulation that comes with many of the bars in Sweet Side.
Which reminds me. I should have a package to pick up at home.
After collecting my shit, I pile into my Hummer and head out. Sure enough, when I get home, there’s a delivery waiting on me. I drop the noise reducing earplugs I ordered for Alexis onto the counter before going to check on Cilantro and the iguana Al dubbed Scary Terry, even though the thing is about as far from frightening as it gets.
I reload the lizard’s food and water, making sure the temperature in his enclosure is within the right range, then grab Cilantro and carry her into the living room. She purrs on the sofa next to me, kneading the cushion as I add a few rows to the scarf I’ve been secretly working on when Al’s not around.
Which isn’t often.
We’ve spent nearly every evening together for the past two and a half weeks, and it’s been fucking magical. Since we’re still early in the pre-season, I’m usually finished with practice before she gets off work, so I make us dinner, adding a few rows to the scarf I plan to give her the day of our first home match while it cooks. Then she comes over, we eat and watch television and talk and joke.
Then we go to bed and fuck like animals.
I’m just finishing up a row when my cell starts to ring. I grab it, expecting to see Leo’s name across the screen. Instead, it’s Alexis calling me.
She’s never called me before and my stomach clenches in excitement at this new development. This new level of connection.
I quickly swipe across the screen. There’s no hiding my eagerness to talk to her, even if I wanted to, so I don’t bother pretending her call isn’t the most important thing at this moment. “Hey.”
Alexis lets out a relieved sounding sigh. “You answered.”
“Of course I answered.” There’s something off in her tone and it has me standing. “What’s wrong?”
She groans. “My freaking car won’t start.”
A slow smile spreads across my face. Not because I’m happy about her car—I don’t like that it left her stranded. But I am happy that I’m the one she called. The one she counted on.
“I’m on my way.” I have my keys in my hand before she can say another word. “Are you still at work?”
“Ugh. Yes.” She blows out another loud sigh. “I would be way less pissy about it if I could wait in the comfort of my own apartment. Instead I’m stuck standing here in the parking garage.”
“Go back up to the office and hang out there.” I don’t like the thought of her being uncomfortable while she waits for me. “I’ll come up when I get there.”
“Yeah? You don’t mind?” She sounds skeptical and it makes me regret not kicking Big-Nose’s ass even more. Then again, he’s clearly set the bar low as hell.
“Of course I don’t mind, Al. What kind of man would want you to wait for him in a hot car?” I know what kind. I just want to make sure she sees the difference between me and anyone who came before.
“What kind of man indeed.” There’s a hint of a smile in her voice and I can picture the way it’s trying to twist her full lips. “How long do you think it will take you to get here?”
“I’m already in the elevator.” I punch the button to close the door. “My phone might cut out.”
“I’ll let you go then.” She pauses. “Be careful.”
My chest warms at her concern and I press a hand over the spot. “Always.”
I’m still smiling as I climb behind the wheel and whip out of the garage, unable to stop myself from pushing the limits as I speed toward the building where Alexis works. I can’t wait to see her. Can’t wait to show her how right she was by calling me. By trusting me to take care of her.
Because I’m starting to think I might want to do it forever. I know it’s early for that, but I can’t imagine not having her in my life. Smiling at me every morning and eating dinner with me every night.
I get to her work in record time, but it still feels like it takes forever and, after parking it in the vacant spot next to her little crossover, I practically jump out of my Hummer. The elevator moves maddeningly slow as it carries me to her floor and I rush out the second the doors open, like the eager bastard I am.
I haven’t been to Al’s office before, but I’ve sent her flowers a couple times, so I have the suite number memorized. When I reach it, I pull the door open, ready to be her knight in well-worn jeans.
And come face to face with the sight of her luscious body pressed against that fucker who came to her place Christmas morning.