Chapter Eleven
SOMETHING HAD SHIFTED in Jade. Luca felt it.
He couldn’t put his finger on exactly what it was, but she was less guarded around him.
Softer. When she looked at him, there was a tenderness that made his heart swell in his chest, but there was also an accompanying vulnerability that stirred all those atavistic urges he was fighting so hard to keep caged.
He still wasn’t sure he should have confided so much to her.
It had hurt to revisit that time, but it had also felt good to bring his family back to life in that small way.
It left him grieving in a new way, though.
He wished his mother could have met Jade.
His sister would have been close to her age.
They would have been friends. He knew it.
And his father?
She was right that he was unlikely to be tested the way his father had been, but his growing feelings for her were still uncomfortable. They scratched at his otherwise impervious self-control.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Jade asked as their car stopped outside the restaurant in London.
“It’s dinner,” he dismissed. “I drag you to things like this all the time.”
Besides, it was only Damian and Carmel. Jade had spent the day with Carmel at the Davenwear office and arrived back at his town house alight with excitement for her new position.
They were spending the week here so she could get to know the team at the office and see her mother before she had to curtail travel through the rest of her pregnancy.
“Good to see you again.” Damian shook Luca’s hand as he and Jade arrived at their table.
“God, you look incredible,” Carmel said to Jade, kissing her cheeks.
Luca stole another admiring glance at Jade himself. She wore a plain, body-hugging minidress that was draped in a sheer poncho of lace with scalloped patterns and ruffles around the cuffs and hem.
On anyone else, it might have looked tentlike and frumpy, but the peacock blue color showcased her hair and the cut offered a delightfully extensive view of her freckled legs in a pair of bronze heels. She wore the emerald earrings he had given her and her smile was pure sunshine.
“There’s no secret to it. I wear what Hiro gives me,” Jade said with a wave of her hand. “We’ll meet with him when you come to Milan. Maternity athletics is a niche you could absolutely slay.”
“See? I never would have thought of that,” Carmel said as they sat.
“But listen. I have to tell you something.” She turned grave.
“I didn’t plan this, and I told Damian we might have to leave.
He’s already booked us a table nearby. It’s totally fine if you’d prefer to go there because Abigail is here. ”
“Oh?” Jade glanced around reflexively.
Her half sister? Luca looked around, too, even though he didn’t know who he was looking for.
“They’re with a party in the celebration room.
” Carmel pointed to a pair of closed doors.
“Not a family thing,” she added with significance.
“Our fathers are good friends so she came over to say hello when she saw me.” She offered a flat smile that acknowledged Abigail’s father was also Jade’s father.
“I didn’t tell her who we were meeting.”
“I’m sure she’ll ignore me if she spots me.” Jade shrugged. “I’m not worried.”
It was a far cry from locking herself in a library to avoid the woman, which pleased Luca to see.
Nevertheless, his inner warrior strapped on his combat gear and he remained watchful through the otherwise pleasant dinner.
The four of them conversed easily about entertainment and travel, sprinkling in business and current events.
When they wrapped up, they promised to get together again soon. Luca shook Damian’s hand while they were at the coat check, but Jade hung back as the other couple left.
“You’re going to kill me. I need the ladies’ room again.”
“I’d think you’d be the one wanting to kill me for that,” Luca said, waiting while she hurried down the short hallway to the toilets.
Moments later, as Jade started to make her way back to him, another couple came through a nearby door. The man was asking, “Did you leave it in the car?”
“No, I’m sure it’s in my coat pocket. Do you have the ticket?”
The woman was Jade’s sister. Luca knew it by the shape of her jaw and a similarity in the ring of her voice.
He sent a warning look to Jade, but she was already here, pulling herself up short with the tiniest catch of surprise in her breath, before smiling up at him, ignoring the other couple.
Luca held her light raincoat, using his body to shield her as he held it for her, intending to usher her away without acknowledging the other couple at all.
“Jade?” It was the man who spoke, tone startled.
Abigail turned and caught her breath.
Jade ignored them. Her face wore the impervious mask Luca hadn’t seen since their early days. It made his stomach clench.
“Ready?” He waved her to precede him.
“You’re not even going to say hello?” the man asked.
“Wyatt,” Abigail scolded breathily.
Luca had been bracing himself to protect his wife from her, but despite the fact that Abigail wore a diamond the size of a golf ball, this Wyatt person seemed to be very intent on Jade. His gaze was covetous.
Jade didn’t acknowledge him at all. She only glanced at Abigail and said, “This is the engagement I got so much flack for overshadowing? Be careful. Even when he tells you he loves you, he’ll stab you in the back.” She turned toward the door.
“Bitch,” Wyatt said.
“Watch it,” Luca warned in a tone he’d never heard come out of himself. It was beyond lethal. He was putting together that this was the man who had claimed to love Jade only to cut her loose and shred her reputation. Luca stepped between them so Jade was fully blocked from the other man’s vision.
Wyatt looked startled—and suitably wary—as he took in the way Luca clenched his fists and bunched his shoulders.
Luca didn’t pick fights, but his father had taught him from a young age how to handle himself if he wound up in one. He had always been the last man standing.
“See?” Jade said flatly to Abigail. She clasped the bulge of Luca’s biceps. “Don’t bother. He means nothing to me.” She tugged him out the door.
“You’re quiet. Are you upset?” Luca asked when they arrived back at the town house.
“No. Not at all.” She let him take her coat and hang it. “I think I’m wondering why I ever was.”
“You really didn’t know that’s who she was marrying?” He sat on the other end of the sofa and nodded at her feet.
She could manage her own shoes, but it was one of those small things he seemed to like doing for her so she swiveled and let him cup her heel to unbuckle the strap.
“I stopped going online ages ago, when you said your PR team could monitor it.” Ignorance really was bliss. His people sent a link if praise came from a noteworthy source, but otherwise she didn’t have to see any of it.
No one except her mother had known she’d ever been more involved with Wyatt than the brief hookup he’d claimed it had been. That’s why Carmel hadn’t seen any reason to mention that he was Abigail’s date. She probably didn’t know about them at all.
“I just think it’s such an irony that I wouldn’t have met you if not for Giselle and all those petty people I’ve always resented.”
He set her shoes on the floor and she scooched closer to him.
“But if I hadn’t let myself be taken advantage of, I wouldn’t have this baby.” She touched where their son was curled so securely inside her, a tiny miracle that was changing her life for the better. So much better. “Or you.”
“One could argue I took advantage of you.” The corner of his mouth curled sardonically.
“I’m thinking of doing it again.” He angled toward her, setting his arm on the back of the sofa.
His other hand reached to draw her legs up and drape them over his thighs, then he scooped her a few inches closer.
“Be my guest.” She slipped a hand under the edge of his suit jacket.
“It does border on absurd, though. I’ve never particularly liked Yardley. I was furious at myself for being duped into attending that party.” His fingers drew seductive patterns on her thigh. “But I can’t say I regret it.”
“No?” A tentative hope blossomed in her chest. The last layers of her defenses fell away as she memorized this particular expression of admiration and lazy heat that he wore. “Because…” Her heart rose into her throat.
This was such a big gamble, but how many times had he asked her to trust him? She wanted him to know that she was committed to him. To this marriage and the family they were building. That she was all in.
“All I could think tonight was that whatever I had felt for Wyatt wasn’t even real love. It was the hope of it, maybe. I think there was even a part of me that thought being with him could make me one of them? Which is—” She cringed.
“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.” He drew back a little.
“I want to.” She touched his chest, fingering a button on his shirt.
“I want you to know that…” She swallowed, feeling more defenseless than she ever had in her life.
But how would they move forward if she didn’t tell him how she felt?
“I would have thought that’s what love was if I hadn’t met you. And learned what real love feels like.”
His nostrils pinched as he drew in a sharp breath, head recoiling slightly. A flash of agony creased his face. “Jade—”
Her heart lurched in panic, but another part of her took his rebuff with absolute calm. This is what true love is. It was given freely, without conditions around reciprocation or anything else.
“It’s okay if you don’t say it back.” It hurt. Of course it hurt. She longed for him to love her back, but, “I know why you don’t want to love me. I just wanted you to know how I felt.” And she was only able to withstand so much. “But I’m tired so I’ll go to bed.”
She swung her legs to the floor and stood, heart thudding as she waited for him to catch her back. Say something.
He didn’t.
So she left.
You don’t know what you’ll do for someone you love.
Luca was starting to learn, though. He would have happily flattened that ex of hers for calling her names.
It was a primitive reaction that told him he didn’t deserve her love. That’s what he wanted to say as she walked away. Don’t give me your heart. It’s too dangerous.
That would have been as cruel as his silence, which had hurt her. He knew it had, but loving her meant turning into his father—a man who was willing to do anything for his family, and had ultimately gotten them killed.
It was a paradox, one made worse by the fact that withholding his feelings injured her. If he truly loved her, he needed to protect her from himself.
Neither of them slept properly, but she didn’t turn to him. He resisted reaching for her, even though he badly wanted to hold her. What would he do except take advantage of her to soothe his own turmoil, though?
He rose early, still edgy, and tried to outrun himself on the treadmill. He would wake her before he left for Milan. She was staying in London to see her mother and work at Davenwear for the week.
As soon as he had agreed to this week apart, he had regretted it, but perhaps this break was a blessing, giving them a chance to recalibrate. To retrench and reassemble their defenses.
He showered and was sitting down to breakfast when Atbridge’s assistant called him.
“Cardillo,” Luca said, accepting the call on speaker.
“I know what you come from.” It was Atbridge himself, speaking with cold venom. “I’ve had people in Sicily since you started interfering in my life. Unless you want all of that coming to light, stay the hell away from my family.”