Chapter 19 – Elliot
ELLIOT
Ipace, my heavy chain dragging along the ground as I walk. Shade has been gone too long, and now I’m left wondering who she killed. Was it someone innocent? Someone who didn’t deserve it?
She says she only kills the guilty, but I don’t trust Lord Drac, not one bit.
As I turn to pace again, the shade is suddenly there before me. She glances in my direction, but there’s something unreadable in her gaze. Not speaking to me, she goes to the tub and turns it on, filling it with bubble bath again.
“Are you okay?” I ask. “You were gone a long time.”
She hesitates. “I met all your gargoyles.”
My heart races. “And what happened?”
“We agreed to a plan. I will find a way to take the barrier down, so that they can come and rescue you, and they won’t fight anyone in the castle.”
I’m actually surprised, and happy. Part of me could never imagine them making such a deal, but I’m glad they did. As much as I wanted to kill these vampires and prove myself to my father, I’ve realized I also don’t want to hurt the shade. And a battle here would hurt her.
She’d have to pick a side, and it wouldn’t be ours.
And now, I don’t think I could hurt her.
She stands from beside the tub and strips off a dress splattered with blood. Then she steps into the water. My gaze moves between her body and the bubbles.
“Who did you kill?” I ask.
Her eyes close, and I swear she shivers.
“A woman. A human woman, this time. She was creating some kind of sacrifice for a ritual. She had gravely injured another woman.” She pauses for a long moment.
“The victim died before my feet, and there was nothing I could do to help her. My only comfort is knowing that her attacker will be punished for eternity.”
This shade is the monster we were sent to kill. A person who was trying to save an innocent. A person who seems shaken remembering what happened.
She’s not who I expected. Not in any way.
“Does it actually make you feel better to know what the attacker will experience in the Underworld?”
She sinks down a little deeper in the water.
“I don’t know, but I promised the dying woman that she would be avenged, and perhaps that’s enough.
It doesn’t matter that I hate the Underworld, that I hate bringing people there.
All that matters is that maybe the woman left this world knowing that her death wouldn’t go unpunished. ”
“That would be hard to do,” I tell her, moving a little closer to the tub.
She shrugs her shoulders. “No harder than a judge sentencing a man to life in jail. Or a jury giving the death penalty. All things Lord Drac has explained to me.” Her purple-eyed gaze sweeps to me. “Or any harder than a gargoyle killing someone to protect the innocent.”
My chest feels tight for a long minute. I’d never really seen us that way. But everything she says has the strangest ring of truth.
“How is my Brotherhood?”
Her gaze holds mine. “They’re unhappy and lost in this world. The place they call a home hurts them more than helps them.”
I stiffen. “I meant, how are they doing out there with me here?”
Her gaze never leaves mine. “They are miserable. But I don’t think getting you back will fix that. Damon needs to drink less, Jordon is troubled, and Cody seems lost.”
For some reason, I feel defensive. I’m their leader, their alpha, any of their problems are a direct reflection on me.
And they’re not that bad. They do everything that is asked of them in the sanctuary.
They help with the gargoyle babies. They take over responsibilities so the fathers can enjoy their children. They’re not useless.
“It’s just…hard to live forever.”
“It’s hard to live forever when you’re unhappy,” she corrects.
And she’s right.
I sit down beside her bathtub and lean against the cool porcelain. “It’s my fault. I’m their leader, and I don’t know how to fix this.”
“It’s easy,” she says. “Make a new home. Leave where you are. You guys are immortal. Search until you find the place you belong.”
“Like you did?”The words slip from my lips.
She’s quiet for a long minute. “I’ve only been alive a short time. I’m still trying to understand this world. Life would be easier if I remained here, but I won’t stay if I’m unhappy.”
How can she seem so young and innocent in one moment and so wise the next? My mind starts to turn over her words. What if we leave this place and don’t return to the sanctuary?
The thought hits me like a bucket of water. I’ve never in my life considered just not going back. I’ve travelled a little. I’ve seen the world a little. But it was only for short periods of time. Always, I knew I had to go back, that my people were counting on me.
But are they really? And do my men deserve to continue dying inside for honor? Because we feel we have to remain with our people?
“You might be right.”
A wet hand brushes lightly over the top of my head. “I am right.”
“What happens now?” I ask.
“I’m bathing and getting ready for dinner tonight. I’ll be expected there. I’ll speak to Lord Drac and try to find the perfect time to go to his room and take the crystal. When I figure out when to go, I’ll talk to the others and create our plan.”
“Thanks,” I say.
“For what?” she asks, a little humor in the question.
“For helping me escape. For not killing me. For that…kiss, earlier.”
“We almost had sex,” she says.
She’s right. “Yeah, we did.”
“Should we try again tonight? After dinner?”
My treacherous cock hardens at just the thought. “It’d be a bad idea.”
“Maybe,” she says. “But it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t.”
As she takes her bath, scrubbing herself with her sweet smelling soaps, I’m left hard and aching, trying to remember all the reasons sex with her would be a bad idea. It seems like I’ll be gone from this place in just a few days, back with my Brotherhood, so would it really hurt?
I think I’m just trying to come up with any solution possible to be with her. I know it. And I know I’m desperate for her touch. To be inside of her. But it doesn’t make me want her any less.
At last, she rises from the tub and dries.
Going to her closet, she pulls out a dress, seemingly at random, and slides it on.
When she turns to face me, jealousy and desire war within me.
The material is too thin. It clings to every curve of her body, sinfully delicious, and not at all what I want her wearing in a room full of asshole vampires.
“Do you have anything else?”
She frowns. “A whole closet. Lord Drac had every dress made especially for me.”
Of course he did.
“What’s wrong with this one?”
“It’s practically see-through,” I tell her.
“So, it’s clothes,” she tells me, shrugging.
My pulse picks up. “You’re beautiful. You’re desirable. Men will want you when they see you in that.”
“They’ll want me in anything I wear,” she says.
She’s right, but my gut churns at just the thought of her out being seen in such a gown.
“I’ll choose something else, if it makes you happy.” She turns to her closet, sheds the gown, and picks another one, seemingly at random. When the long, purple gown slides over her body, she turns back to me.
This gown is no better. The material is a touch thicker, but the neckline is dangerously low, almost to her belly button. That fucking Lord Drac knew exactly what he was doing when he chose these clothes for her.
I turn away, feeling angry, pressing my back harder into the porcelain tub. Her clothes aren’t her fault, nor do I get to tell her, or any woman, what she can or can’t wear.
A second later, she climbs into my lap.
I move my chained hands out of the way, almost instinctively, and she’s suddenly kissing me. My dick hardens and a rush fills my ears. I grasp her waist, the best I can with the damn cuffs and chains, and pull her harder against me.
The material of her gown bunches up around her thighs, and my loincloth is useless. My cock presses against the outside of her pussy, and I groan, knowing just how close I am to being inside of her.
She tilts her head and opens her lips, allowing my tongue to slip inside her mouth and tangle with her own. I don’t think she knows what she’s doing as she bounces against the head of my cock, but it drives me wild.
Breaking our kiss, I trail my lips down her neck, and she leans back. My mouth easily pushes aside the material of her dress, and then I’m sucking one of her sweet nipples once more.
Her breathing becomes rapid. One of her hands moves between us to grasp my cock and start stroking.
My vision goes white for a minute, and then I move to her other breast, sucking and licking, trying to keep my calm.
“Elliot?” My name is spoken in her husky, breathless voice.
“Huh?” I murmur against her breast.
“I changed my mind. We should have sex now.”
Oh hell! We shouldn’t. We really shouldn’t.
And then she starts to sink down my shaft.
“Fucking hell,” I groan, tearing my lips from her breast. “We…should…go slower.”
She leans forward and bites my ear before whispering. “Or faster. Make me come again, Elliot. Please.”
I lift her dress off and toss it to the floor. Stretching my legs out in front of me, I press against the side of the tub as the woman slides lower and lower onto my dick. She’s so damned wet, but tight too.
I don’t know a lot about sex, but I know it can hurt her if she isn’t ready. So, using one of my hands, I begin to stroke her clit once more. Her muscles jump around my shaft, and I have to clench my teeth to stop myself from coming right there.
When she comes down fully on top of me, she makes a breathless, happy noise and rocks a little.
I see stars in front of my vision.
“Does that feel good?” she asks.
“You have no idea,” I pant out.
Her hands grip my shoulders, and her nails slice into my flesh. “I’ve never done this before,” she tells me, even though I already know.
“I haven’t either,” I say, and the words sound torn from my lips.
She rubs harder against me, and my thumb works the folds of her pussy over my cock harder. I want this to be all pleasure for her. I want her to feel as good as she makes me feel.
And then she leans forward and kisses me. Our mouths are frantic against each other as she lifts up, pulling my dick nearly free from her body, then slams back down on top of me.
We both cry out against the others lips, and then we’re breathing hard, frozen for a long minute.
And she does it again.
And again.
A roar tears from my lips, and I grasp her hips. Shifting so that she’s beneath me, I begin to fuck her right there on the ground. The shade moans my name and wraps her legs around my back, bringing me deeper each time I thrust into her.
My entire body shudders. The need to come is so powerful that I might burst into a thousand pieces as I try to hold back, and then she orgasms. Her body clenches my dick like a vice, her muscles trembling.
Not able to hold out for another minute, I come, filling her warm channel with my seed. Pumping into her over and over again as if each motion is a tattoo, burning a memory of me into her forever. As if this isn’t one stolen moment between two desperate people.
And then I collapse on top of her. More satisfied than I’ve ever been in my life.
So, this is sex. Hell, I can’t believe I waited this long. And for what? A chance to be with a female gargoyle that we’d known for too long would never happen?
I was a fool.
But then, I couldn’t imagine just going out and fucking anyone now. No, the only one I could imagine doing this with is Shade. Which is strange. This bond between us…it feels too strong for the short time we’ve spent together.
“That was wonderful,” she whispers.
I kiss her for a long minute before pulling back. “Yeah, it was.”
The desire to hold her again, to make love to her again, builds inside of me. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted just to feel someone against me so much in my life.
A slight knocking at her door has the shade leaping off of me and throwing on her dress. I sit up, adjust my loincloth, and try to sit on the ground as if I’m miserable. She smooths down the purple fabric of her dress and hurries to the door.
When the door opens, the shade is just a few feet in front of it. The maid enters the room and looks between us again. I jerk my gaze down, as if I’m a good little prisoner, miserable in the shade’s torturous room.
“Lord Drac wishes you to join him for dinner.”
The shade gives a nod and glances back at me for the briefest moment. “Of course.”
I want to tell her not to go. To just stay here with me. But that’s not the life we have.
The shade hurries out the door, but the maid lingers. After a moment, she closes the door behind her. “You think I’m stupid?”
I say nothing, but I’m really starting to hate this woman.
“Lord Drac believes his shade to be some powerful creature capable of the kind of bloodlust he desires in a mate, but I know the truth. She’s soft. Too soft to kill a creature like you. Too soft to be the bride he so desires.”
“Shades are dangerous monsters,” I hiss at her, glaring at the ground.
“Perhaps they are, but she isn’t.”
I don’t move. I don’t speak.
“When Lord Drac realizes that not only are you still alive but watching his shade bathe, he’s going to end your miserable life. Hell, he might end hers too.”
Shit. I’ve put her in danger.
“I didn’t watch her bathe.”
She scoffs. “Goodnight, gargoyle. Enjoy it. Because tonight might be your last.”
Before I can respond, she slips from the room. My heart races and I rise. I wanted to escape. I wanted to get back to my Brotherhood. But I never wanted to put her in danger.
For some reason, I hate myself for not thinking of how this could hurt her.
My whole life I’ve been told that gargoyles fight and protect, and that I’m a miserable excuse for a gargoyle. I think my father was right. Not only am I a terrible warrior, but I can’t even protect the one woman who I’ve grown to care for.
Perhaps I don’t deserve to be saved.