Chapter 5 – Rokad
ROKAD
Iam not good with people. As the product of a monster and a gargoyle, my grandfather worked hard to keep me and my brothers far from our gargoyle kind.
From the time I was a small child, he reminded me daily that I was responsible for my mother’s death.
The day she gave birth to me and my brothers, her life was lost. It made me feel shame.
It made me feel guilt. And I tried each and every day to prove to him that we weren’t a mistake.
That we deserved to live, even if in living we killed our mother.
But I was constantly proved wrong. No matter what I did, the demon within my brothers and I was always there, just below the surface. I couldn’t do what needed to be done. I couldn’t raise my brothers correctly.
I failed them.
And it seemed a fitting punishment when Lucas and I were tasked with guarding our phoenix in a place devoid of other life. It was painful, but fitting, when Narath was bespelled to sleep, so that his rage couldn’t hurt anyone again.
And yet, I consider myself a good person. A good gargoyle. And a good man.
So why do I feel like shit right now?
I stand outside the door of the bar, looking across the parking lot. Her truck is in the shadows in one corner. It’s away from the lights and the street, tucked near a dark, abandoned building next door.
Some instinct tells me to go after her, to explain that I’m just an asshole who has no idea how to speak to a beautiful woman who makes my heart race and my palms sweaty, but that doesn’t seem to be enough.
I should probably walk away. I should probably not subject her to my company again, because I’m almost guaranteed to hurt her again.
So why do I start heading out into the dark night, straight toward her truck?
I don’t have a clue, but I keep going.
Her windows are tinted. I can’t see her from the outside, but I know she’s there. I walk completely up to her window, then cup my face and press it against the glass. I make out her still form in the driver’s seat. Is her forehead on the steering wheel?
Damn it.
Circling the truck, I go to the passenger window and knock lightly. A second later, the door is pushed open, and she’s there, frowning at me.
My breath catches in my throat. I have never seen a woman who looks like her before.
She’s not pretty in the traditional sense.
Her beauty is more like a rare and prized piece of art.
The different colors of her hair almost dance together when she moves, and her golden eyes are soft and intelligent all at the same time.
Her brows are dark, and they arch over her large eyes in a way that almost feels innocent.
I always thought the female gargoyles were beautiful, but I’ve never felt so instantly drawn to another person before. It’s as if she's not something I’ve ever interacted with, and at the same time, someone I’ve been longing to meet for a very long time.
“Did you just come to stare at me?” she asks, lifting a brow.
I stiffen. I am staring, which is definitely making the situation worse. “I’m sorry.”
The words come out blunt and wooden. “I didn’t know. But I shouldn’t have assumed.”
She studies me for a long moment, but then sighs. “Get in.”
I do. Maybe it isn’t smart to get into a car with someone who could easily be the monster we’re searching for, but my instincts are pretty damned good, and they’re saying this woman isn’t capable of hurting an innocent. So, I close the door behind me and let the silence surround me.
“So, what do you think it is?” she asks.
“It?”
“The person or thing that’s taking the children.”
I debate about lying, but then I decide to hell with it. “Probably a cyclops. There was a very powerful one that escaped from the Underworld.”
She hisses out a breath
“What is it?” I ask, tension singing through my body.
She hesitates, then her words come out soft.
“Cyclops feed on flesh. And they prefer the flesh of children.” She pauses, then continues.
“There was one they always threatened to give me to. Several times they dragged me from my cell and down the hall.” Her words grow tenser with each word.
“They’d throw open his door, and I could just make him out and hear the sound of his chains.
I would scream and fight, and then they’d laugh and let me go back to my mother. ”
Her eyes squeeze together for a moment, and I don’t know what I’m doing when I reach out and touch her face.
And she slaps me. Hard. My head cracks to one side, and I turn back to her with shock.
Her eyes are wide. She presses one hand to her mouth and then says, “I’m so sorry. Few people have ever touched me without hurting me before, so I just reacted. I didn’t--” And then, she just stops talking.
I touch my cheek. “It’s okay.”
And then her hand covers mine and our eyes meet again. “It’s not. I’m so fucked up. I’m sorry. I should be able to have someone touch me without losing it.”
Her hand feels tiny and warm against mine, and for a second, I’m scared to even move, just in case she pulls away from me again. “I don’t even know what I’d do if someone unexpectedly touched me. I’ve spent my life around just my brothers.” And Conley, but things are already confusing enough.
“Surely you had girlfriends?” she says, and a little smile plays at her lips.
I shake my head, frowning. Where would I possibly find a girlfriend?
“So…you’ve never…?”
Oh, fuck. Did I just confess to being a virgin in front of a woman I find attractive?
My head is swimming. Aren’t I here to do a job?
Wasn’t I supposed to check out the bar and ask around?
I don’t know. But I sure as hell wasn’t supposed to end up in a car with a beautiful woman confessing that I don’t know anything about women.
“You’ve never even kissed anyone before?” she finally asks.
I release a slow breath. Kiss. Okay. “No. Never.”
She stares at me with big eyes.
“It’s not that weird,” I mumble. “Gargoyle women are rare, and we can only have children with other gargoyles, so--”
Suddenly, she’s moving toward me. I don’t even know what to do when her lips connect with mine, but then every logical thought is gone.
Her lips are so damn soft, so tentative as they press against my own.
And it’s like my body knows what to do, even though I don’t.
I kiss her right back, the pressure between us growing harder and harder.
My mouth parts, and her tongue darts inside.
I groan, and I don’t know what I’m doing when I grab her and pull her into my lap until she’s straddling me. She pushes me back a little, and our mouths tangle together.
For a second, I feel like this is the best thing I’ve ever experienced, and then she begins to rub against my cock.
And, fuck, all my blood rushes down. I hadn’t even realized how hard I’d gotten until she starts rubbing against me in rhythm.
When her lips break from mine, I’m kissing down her neck, lost in a sweet scent like honey, a scent that’s all her.
“Do you…do you want to?” she pants out.
Want to? I want to do everything! I want this to never stop.
“Anything,” I groan.
She pulls my shirt off, hauling it over my head. Her hands move down my chest, and I feel my nipples tightening. Her nails scrape them, and a hiss escapes my lips. My entire head spins, and I lean back, overcome with things I don’t understand.
Her hands begin to work the fly of my pants. It only takes her a second to pull my dick free, and then her bare skin is wrapped around my hard length.
There’s a second where I honestly think I’m going to lose control and spill my seed right then. But then, she half climbs off of me, shimming out of her pants and underwear.
I want…I don’t know what I want. More. More of her. I want to undress her. I want to kiss her and memorize this moment forever. But I’m like a raging fire. I can’t seem to control myself, and I sure as hell don’t want to control her.
When she straddles me again, she begins to gently rub herself against my length.
At first, it’s just along her slit, and then she lets me in, just a little, and I’m shocked by how her wet and warm body makes me crazy.
Is this what sex is always like? Is it so uncontrollable?
Does it awaken things inside yourself you didn’t know were there?
“You’re big,” she pants out.
Fuck. “We’ll go…slow. As slow as you want.”
But going slow seems to be the last thing on her mind. She continues to rub against me, until I carefully slide her tank top down. Now, I’m staring at her black lacy bra, a bra that just barely hides her perfect breasts, as she slides down my cock.
It’s overwhelming. She’s so damn hot and perfect. But I know enough to know that her pleasure comes first. So as much as my cock aches to explode, I tell the bastard to focus. Focus on her.
Tugging her bra down, I lean closer and take one of her nipples into my mouth.
She gasps and leans back, while simultaneously pressing herself harder on my cock.
I feel my head dip into her tight channel, and it’s like coming to life.
She sinks slowly, oh so slowly, lower on me, while I lavish her breast, and then I move onto the other one.
I always thought sex would be slow, a process where I carefully learned about a woman’s body and how it worked. This is none of those things. It’s fast, and yet, somehow perfect.
My hands cup her breasts, and I enjoy the weight of them as I continue to suck her, then use my thumbs to play with the nipple I’m not sucking on. My cock seems to swell with each moment that passes, and she’s gasping in breaths as fast as I am when she comes to my hilt.
The fit is tight, so tight that it feels like I’m being squeezed in all the right places.
And then, it gets better. She lifts off of me and slams back down. Over and over again.
I hold myself still, scared as hell to hurt her. Scared as hell to do the wrong thing.
But as she keeps working my body, I release her breasts and tilt back. My hips begin to thrust of their own accord, and then we’re moving together. It’s perfect. A dance as old as time.
Her body suddenly tenses around me, squeezing me harder, and then she begins to moan. She moves faster, and I move faster along with her. And even though I’ve never seen a woman orgasm, I know that’s what is happening now. Her voice. Her pace. The way she begins panting my name.
It’s too much.
I explode, filling her with my hot seed. The sensation is like nothing I’ve felt in my life. Electricity sizzles through my entire body, awakening a thirst inside of me I never knew existed.
She keeps going, and I keep thrusting into her, feeling a strange line somewhere between pleasure and pain, and then she collapses. Her mouth rests against my throat in an intimate way that I love.
I never imagined anything could feel better than this moment. It’s perfect. This woman is perfect.
What we just did together…we need to do together again and again.
And then she pulls back from me, and her hands go to both sides of my face. “What…what was that?”
I shake my head, not having a clue what came over us.
Her eyes are so damned wide. “I’ve never felt a need like that. It was like my other need. But different. Stronger. I just couldn’t…”
I don’t know what she’s saying. “It’s natural.” I think.
She shakes her head, and I’m shocked by the panic on her face. She pulls off of me and adjusts her top, before reaching for her pants and underwear.
I pull up my boxers and pants, not knowing what to say.
“Can you get out?” she asks.
Get…out?
I feel lost as I grab my shirt, open the door, and step out, closing the door behind me. I circle the front of the vehicle to the driver’s side, determined to say or do something to make sense of all this. But she turns on the engine and guns it out of the parking lot.
“What the hell just happened?” I ask the night. But, of course, there’s no answer.
I pull on my shirt and stare at her taillights as they disappear. All I have ever wanted was a woman of my own, a woman to share with my brothers. But because of what we are, I never imagined it would happen for us. With this Em, things have gone from nothing to something amazing.
Now I just have to figure out what I did wrong.