Chapter 19 #2
Then her teeth chattered. Red pulled back. She lay motionless, but she’d responded. He continued caressing her, praying for her, calling her back to him.
The shivering started small and lasted only a minute before it stopped and she lay quiet for a while. Then it came again. This time, it hit her hard, shaking her violently.
Red held her through it, rubbing her arms and back, moving his legs against hers and tucking her icy feet on top of his.
Her teeth rattled until he was afraid they might break.
Her body vibrated wildly. He massaged her and called softly.
After turbulent minutes that seemed to stretch out for hours, the shivering eased.
Her brown eyes flickered open. Was she awake or not? Her eyelids closed heavily.
“Wake up, honey,” Red crooned. “C’mon, Cass. Come all the way back to me.”
She shifted against him, and her arms went around his waist. Her fingers were like icicles on his back, and he pulled her hands around and tucked them between their bodies.
He pressed her head into the crook of his shoulder, and her nose was so cold, he couldn’t control a little jump.
He prayed aloud, hoping she could hear and draw comfort from his words.
The shivering started again. It lasted longer this time. The wracking seemed as though it would tear her apart. How much could Cassie or the baby take? When this bout passed, Red looked down, hoping for another glimpse of her eyes. She was awake and staring at him.
“I’m here, Cass. I’m so sorry I wasn’t sooner. But I’m here now. You’re going to be all right.” Red prayed it was true.
“Wade came. I hid from him.”
“You did good.” Red hugged her close. “He didn’t find you.”
Cassie slid her hands down to her stomach. “I tried to take care of her.” Her voice broke and tears filled her eyes. “I tried.”
“Did he hurt you, Cass, honey?” Red didn’t think Wade had gotten his hands on Cassie. If he had, she wouldn’t be here.
Cassie shook her head. “No. No, he never found me. I was so afraid. But then…I wasn’t afraid anymore, just tired. ‘The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?’”
The shivering resumed. This time, it wasn’t as hard or long.
Red cradled her and praised her and stroked her cold body back to warmth. She tried to fall asleep, but Red didn’t let up on her until he was sure she was warm again.
When the shivers receded for good, he finally let her sleep. He left her to warm the cabin up, then lay back down beside her, pulled her into his arms, and held her, so relieved he couldn’t stop the tears. So in love with her he was afraid to feel the force of it.
Then he thought of Wade, and the anger slammed into him like a freight train.
Red recognized that temper that went with his red hair. He controlled it pretty well, but at that moment, he was overcome. He held his wife and his babe, and he wanted to stay this close to both of them forever. But, almost as much, he wanted to get his hands on Wade Sawyer and tear him apart.
The fury consumed him as he lay beside Cassie’s limp, sleeping body.
He imagined himself hunting Wade down and thrashing him to within an inch of his life.
He savored the vision. He reveled in the power of his hate.
Ideas for Wade’s slow, lingering death paraded across his mind, and carefully avoiding thoughts of God, he planned how he’d make Wade pay.
Just as he was mentally meting out Wade’s final punishment with his bare hands, Red got a message from God he couldn’t ignore. He got kicked in the stomach.
It was the first time he’d felt the babe move since he’d found Cassie in that icy little cave. He’d been so worried about both of them, but Cassie had taken precedence. The little kick told him with a jolt that his child was all right too. It was as if his rational mind returned to him.
Red had a sense then of Satan sitting on his shoulder, suggesting ways to hurt Wade.
Urging vengeance. Calling it justice when it really was hate.
Red knew the devil well enough. He’d had temptations before.
One of them was lying asleep in his arms right now.
Red also knew his Master’s voice, even when it came in the form of a swift kick.
He banished Satan by replacing him with love. Pulling back from Cassie just a bit, he laid one big hand over the little tyke and got kicked again. Red smiled down at Cassie’s oversized belly. The babe was stirring so vigorously, Cassie’s flannel nightgown moved. Red got the message.
He whispered, “I’m sorry, little one. You don’t need a pa with a mean temper, do you?”
The babe kicked him squarely in the middle of his hand, and Red took that for a no.
“But what are we going to do? How am I going to protect you and your ma from him?” Red asked it of the babe, but the answer came from God.
The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?
Who, indeed? Not Wade Sawyer.
Easy to say.
Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.
Wade was in the world, and today, although it had been a close thing, God had protected Cassie. They were safe.
If God be for us, who can be against us?
Well, Wade was definitely against them. But who was Wade compared to God?
Red almost sat up in bed when he remembered falling practically on top of Cassie.
Thinking about it now, he wasn’t sure why he’d stumbled.
He’d been walking carefully, holding on to the wall.
Yet he’d fallen, and his hand had landed on the tiny bit of Cassie’s skirt sticking out of the hole.
Red smiled. God was definitely for them.
Love thy neighbour as thyself.
That one stuck in Red’s throat, and his smile faded.
The babe kicked him.
Red hesitated, and Satan whispered about justice and hate.
The babe kicked him again.
“All right, little one,” Red whispered so Cassie wouldn’t be disturbed. “But Wade doesn’t make it easy.”
The babe booted him hard.
Red had to forgive Wade. It grated on him something fierce, but he knew he had to. He pulled Cassie back into his arms, and the babe seemed to do a somersault of approval. Red grinned, and Cassie shifted against him and moaned sweetly in her sleep.
Forgiving didn’t mean trusting someone who wasn’t repentant. But Wade was in worse trouble than the Dawsons. Red closed his eyes.
Thank You, God, for the miracle of life I’m holding in my arms. The miracle of two lives. Bless Wade. Bring light to the darkness that surrounds him. I love him, Lord. I do. He is Your creation. And I forgive him. But I hope You’ll forgive me, Lord, if it’s a sin that I’m not going to trust him.
He caught himself just as he dozed off. He had left Buck bridled and saddled, running loose. His home had been trashed, and he still had evening chores to do.
With a quick check of Cassie’s fingers and toes, which looked pink and plump now, Red got up and did his chores at a run.
Then he quickly straightened the house, built up the fire, and hung Cassie’s wet things to dry.
When he got back to Cassie, she had rolled all the way to his side of the bed as if she were hunting for him to snuggle up against. He shucked his clothes again and crawled right back into bed with her.
Cassie had said, “The Lord is my light and my salvation.” Did she mean it? Had Cassie really made her own commitment to the Lord?
Red prayed she’d moved beyond just saying what he wanted to hear. He prayed for her and thanked God for her every second he had…until he fell asleep.