Epilogue 1
We left when Lynn and Duncan got there. Duncan gave me a critical look when—wrapped in my shock blanket—I asked him to make sure Thaeros and Echo would be okay.
Soyer led me out of the room, away from the sights in there. The building was swarming with people by then. Ambrose had ordered them to stand by, stay close, to come in when needed or called.
We walked outside on bare feet. Maybe it was the fire or maybe it was the shock, but I barely felt the cold. We were silent, my hand in Soyer’s. He’d brought his car again, and he frowned when we got there.
“Ah, shit.”
I drew the crinkly blanket tight around me. “What is it?”
“I had the keys in my pocket.”
“I see. Oh! That reminds me. Echo gave me your key back. The one for 19B. He said you look after it but not why. Elias said it wasn’t anything bad. Echo… Look, he got hurt, so you can’t be mad. He said it was the safest way to get out of the building.”
Soyer’s face showed a flash of pain, and it nearly had me in tears. He reined it in though, and kissed my hand.
“I’ll tell you what you need to know. The person who lived there left everything behind, and I’m really only looking after things for him.”
I bit the inside of my cheek. “Is he coming back?”
Soyer hesitated. He looked up at the sky, at the few stars visible above the city. As if he were greedy for it, he sucked fresh air into his lungs.
“No.”
I nodded. “That’s good enough for me.”
Soyer glowered at his car. “I don’t even have a spare for this one.”
It wasn’t fair or appropriate, but that filled me with laughter that built slowly but soon was loud in the dark street. Soyer rubbed his face with sooty fingers.
“If this keeps happening, we’ll need a backup car.”
“Can’t we take a cab? Or Ambrose could drive us. Though if we take Elias, I think he’ll make a lot of comments about us being naked together.”
“I like being naked with you, but sure. Let’s go find ourselves a cab.”
We didn’t really look for one. Soyer made one of the Hawthorne people who were outside the building call one for us, and we barely had to wait two minutes.
“Is Jules okay?” I asked when Sundial Tower came into view. “Echo said so, but then after that… I don’t know what happened after he picked me up.”
“Ben was angry is what happened.”
“I’ll apologize. I wanted to call him, but Echo said…he said this was how it had to be.”
Soyer put a corner of his own blanket over my knees. “Ben’s not angry at you, Amory. He’s angry this happened. I’m angry this happened. I’m relieved that you’re fine.” He lowered his head. “This is a second chance. I’m not going to fuck it up, I swear it.”
I cupped his cheek and made him look at me. “You didn’t fuck anything up. I’m just glad the witch is dead. I’m glad you didn’t have to face her alone.”
The corners of his mouth turned down. “Face her… I couldn’t kill her. I knew this was going to happen at some point. I wanted this to happen. I didn't want you there. I sure as fuck didn’t think Cecil would get her with a witch blade. Pretty much the only good thing he ever did.”
He was right about Caecilius, but I didn't want to say that. He was dead, and someone had once told me not to speak ill of the dead. Like so many other things, that was clearly something I needed to reevaluate and unlearn.
Instead, I said, “I wanted to be there. For you.”
He was silent. His eyes, dark pools that shimmered like midnight oceans, remained focused on me for the remainder of the drive. We got out and walked into the building, the sound of the blankets announcing us.
I was looking for Jules, but he wasn’t there. I recognized the man behind the desk though. He’d come to the Moonlight, had introduced himself.
“Atkins,” Soyer said. “Helping out today?”
Atkins straightened. “Mr. Bennet. Mr. Saintclair. I wanted to apologize in person for what happened. For this breach.”
Soyer sighed. “Narcissan. Can’t really do much about that.”
“Perhaps so, but we should have put failsafes in place. We’re going to do that now, which I realize is too little too late.” He hung his head. “I apologize. If there is anything that can be done—”
“It’s fine,” Soyer said. “All’s well that ends well.” He led me toward the elevator, but stopped after two steps. “However, if Sophie hurts Ella, that’s a different thing.”
Atkins straightened. “You have nothing to worry about on that front, Mr. Bennet. Sophie is smart and obedient without forgetting to use her own head. She might just lead the pack someday.”
“If you say so.”
Before Soyer could walk off again, I asked, “Jules is okay? Also, we’re going to need a spare key for our apartment. There was a little fire, and ours accidentally burned.”
“He is very sorry, Mr. Saintclair. He will apologize in person, of course. Hold on a moment while I get you that key.”
As soon as Atkins handed Soyer the key, he whisked me upstairs to our apartment.
Everything looked normal. A blanket was slung over the back of the couch because I’d snuggled up there to read the previous day, and yesterday’s coffee was still in the thermos, waiting for me to drink it before heading to work.
“I had a shift today, and now the co-manager is…” I bit the inside of my cheek. “He’s going to be okay, right? The witch got him. After we ran from her.”
Soyer tossed his blanket into a corner. “I’ll check on them tomorrow. Rae can handle the shift. I sent Ben there. Someone’s probably going to tell them we’re fine.”
I gaped. “They don’t know? Well, it all just happened, but we should tell them. Uh, can you send Ben an email?”
Soyer rolled his eyes. “Wait here. Do not move.”
He walked off into his walk-in hallway closet and came back with the landline phone in hand, dialing. His eyes locked on mine as he waited for an answer.
“It’s me. I’m fine, Amory’s fine. Thaeros is injured. Might be out for a few days, we’ll see. You’re free to go home.”
He hung up, seemingly without waiting for a response. I wasn’t going to hold that against him. It had been a long day.
“Hey, was your trip okay?”
He stared at me with the phone in hand. “Are you seriously asking me that right now?”
“Yes. You came home after an out-of-town trip. Asking how it went is what a good fiancé would do.” I raised my left hand and frowned. The ring was still there, even if it needed cleaning. But my wrist was bare. “Oh, shoot. The watch.”
“I’ll get you another. You can have one for each day of the week if you want.”
I realized it then. Soyer, my firebird, had burned for me. I had been as close to death as he had been when I’d done the same, and he had been afraid. Still was. Behind the calm exterior, Soyer had been scared.
“Just the one will do. Hey, about today. I didn't answer when you called or when you texted, and I’m sorry. Echo said it would work out.”
He heaved a sigh. “Fucking Echo. Come here, my heart. Let me hold you.”
He took me into his arms, there in our hallway. I hugged him back, ignoring that my crinkly blanket had dropped to the floor. Before long, I was kissing him, and he was kissing me. He tasted of ash and gleaming coals, of sparks ready to meet breath and birth fire.
“I wanted to protect you,” I said.
“Don’t ever do that again. If you’d…if you’d…”
His breath hitched. I’d never heard him like that, never seen him so vulnerable, but I understood. Fire had bound us. A curse turned love had stitched our fates together, had made them one. I was supposed to hold him like he’d held me, and I was supposed to be strong when he couldn’t.
I also understood what Elias had told me about letting Soyer be my protector and provider. It gave him purpose, let the firebird know he wasn’t alone under the endless night sky.
I sank to my knees in front of him and watched his eyes focus on me, his lips parting on an inaudible sigh.
“What’re you doing, my heart?”
I touched him, his thighs, kissed the spot where his pubic hair started. “You know what. I want to. I probably won’t be good, but I want to try it.”
The muscles in his shoulders bunched as he cradled my face in his hands in the most tender way possible. “Are you sure? Amory, you don’t have to do that. I’m not mad. I can’t be mad at you when you’re here and safe and alive.”
“It’s not because of that. It’s because I want to give you this. Please?”
He huffed out a small laugh. “You don’t have to beg.”
I opened my mouth to him. He wasn’t all the way firm yet, but Soyer’s libido was as rampant as it always had been. He got hard fast with my mouth so close, and the first lick made him shiver.
It made me wonder whether I could do this well enough to get him to come, or if not, then how I’d continue from here. But I’d have to take this one lick at a time.
I began with his head, focusing on that and lapping at it with my tongue.
The taste of fire was everywhere on him, as if his skin hadn’t quite cooled yet after having burned.
It wasn’t bad. I enjoyed the salty taste underneath the flames, and more than that, Soyer’s reaction to this.
I was almost sure he was exaggerating to make me feel good about myself, but I didn’t mind.
I decided I’d try something else. From experimenting while brushing my teeth, I was all too aware that I didn't have the extreme tolerance Soyer did, that I’d never be able to take him deep into my throat like he’d taken me.
I hoped that wouldn’t matter, hoped that going as far as I could would still be good, would make him feel good, would turn the experience from good to better.
Soyer started breathing through his mouth, letting out low moans as I felt him against my soft palate.
I knew I’d not be able to go farther than this, so I tried moving my mouth up and down, letting my tongue glide against him.
If I compared what I was doing to what Soyer had done with me, this was pathetic.
Yet, it didn’t seem to bother him. He’d curled the fingers of his left hand into my hair, his eyes giving me all that focused attention that was reserved for me exclusively.
I kept doing the same thing, trying to give him as much friction as I could while keeping my teeth safely out of the way. Before too long, he was staring at me with even more intent in his gaze, and then his fingers scraped against my skull.
“I’m about to come. I’m almost…almost… Amory…”
The way his hand tried to guide me, he wanted to let me pull off if I wanted to. And, to be fair, I wasn’t sure about this. But I knew I’d never be entirely sure if I didn’t try. So I worked against his gentle hold, kept using my tongue and mouth.
Soyer came moments later. It flooded my mouth. The taste was smoky, likely still from the fire. I wasn’t able to get everything down. Whenever I’d tasted his cum or my own before, it hadn’t been like this.
As soon as he was done, Soyer sank to his knees in front of me, held me, kissed me. It was ridiculous, us sitting on the ground naked and mostly just holding each other, but that was what we did.
We went to the shower eventually, and then we went to bed. We exchanged both tenderness and sex, one blending into the other, each coming naturally. Sleep came after hours of that, hours of few words filled with the simple joy of being close to each other.
I dreamed of what I thought were fires at first, but just before waking, I realized that the flames I’d seen in my sleep were a beatific firebird’s flame-bright wings.