Chapter 13
JUST A DANCE, RIGHT?
LANEY
Iwas starting to think I needed to be more open-minded about weddings.
This one continued like a dream as my best friend moved through the various milestones.
A choice of salmon and steak. A reception line a mile long.
A cavalcade of sweet and only slightly inappropriate toasts (mine even went reasonably well).
When she and Kevin had finished their first dance to the band’s rendition of “Lover” (Megan was an avowed Swiftie), I couldn’t help dabbing my eyes with a tissue. I was seeing stars, and a fair amount of them were due to the curly-headed tower who hadn’t left my side all evening.
“You’re a good dancer,” I observed as Ronan swept me around the parquet floor that had been set up in the center of the tent.
By this point, we were surrounded by guests. Megan had just led everyone through the Wobble, and the band had decided to slow things down with a blues song, if only to give everyone a chance to catch their breath.
“Would you believe it if I told you that dance classes were required at boarding school?” He guided me through another turn before swinging me back in.
“Where was that? Andover?” I thought I had read something about that on his Wikipedia page.
“Ah, no. Well, it was, but they kicked me out after a year. Then it was Exeter, Deerfield, two others I still can’t remember, and finally, St. Anne’s for the last two years of high school. Honestly, I think Dad paid them to keep me for as long as it took. I spent a lot of time in solitary.”
I grimaced. “Sounds more like a jail than a school.”
I was rewarded with another quick turn and a quicker grin. “Well, the priests weren’t too far from wardens. But it was the nuns who insisted on the dance training.”
“How very scandalous of them.”
“Sister Margaret always wore red stockings under her habit.” He swung me around another turn. “You’re pretty graceful yourself, wife.”
I tried not to think about how that set an ember aglow deep in my gut. “Thank you. And thank you for coming, by the way.”
I found I meant it. On top of acting as a solid guard against Derek’s advances, Ronan also had the knack of drawing conversations away from uncomfortable topics, like my dad’s absence from the wedding and Mom’s death.
“My pleasure.” He guided me through another turn and, as if he knew what the band was going to do before they did it, bent me over his arm in a dip at the end of the song, producing applause around us.
When he brought me back up, I could feel the flush rising in my face.
He grabbed my hand, clearly concerned. “All right? You need water or something? To sit down?”
My heart was thumping away, but it wasn’t because I was overexcited. Nor was it because I’d been drinking (I’d had half a glass of champagne with the toasts and nothing more). “I’m fine. I promise.”
He had a knack of looking at someone with concern without pitying them. Other than Megan and maybe my mother, Ronan was probably the only other person who’d ever learned about my heart condition and managed to do that.
I swallowed as the band started up with a cover of “Wild Horses.” The dance floor cleared out but for a few couples, and I was just turning to leave when he caught my hand again and pulled me close.
“This is a good song,” he said, like that explained the sudden intimacy.
My head fit neatly under his chin, and we swayed like that for a bit. It was nice. Too nice, maybe. Especially since I knew the entire reason he was here in the first place was to end things, not start them again.
But a part of me couldn’t help wondering what it might be like to have someone like this in my life all the time.
Not just for one night in Vegas or under the stars of a wedding, but in my normal life.
Someone to make dinner with at the end of a long day.
Someone to chat with about the news or the latest bit of gossip Megan had told me.
Someone to help me talk through my problems, who would let me help him with his.
A partner.
Which was definitely not Ronan Black.
I needed to remember that.
“Laney?”
When I pulled back to look up at him, the lines around his eyes had softened a bit. That dark gaze drifted down to my mouth and stayed there.
“Ronan,” I murmured. “You probably shouldn’t look at me like that.”
“Like what?” The hand at the small of my back pulled me closer so our chests brushed each other. “Like we’re married?”
He guided my hand so that both of mine were braced on both of his shoulders, closer to an embrace than a simple dance.
“Stop.” My cheeks were heating up.
“Stop what?”
“Stop… everything. Dancing like this. Looking at me like that.”
“You’re not. Why should I?”
It was too much, and I found myself looking around the room, if only to find something to distract me from that intense gaze. It was hard to tell myself he was joking when he looked at me like that. Like he found nothing funny at all about what was going on between us.
The problem was, I didn’t know what was happening between us.
“We didn’t have a wedding dance, did we?” Ronan asked.
I shrugged. “Hard to say. I don’t remember.”
He laughed. It was a nice sound, warm and low. “Too bad. I like dancing with you, Laney Fisher. You feel good in my arms.”
“I like it, too,” I admitted.
“I feel like I should have at least asked your father for his blessing first. Or at least introduced myself. You didn’t say if he was here tonight—”
“He’s not,” I answered quickly. “He decided to stay in Arizona.”
Ronan frowned, like he could see the irritation I was trying to hide. “That’s too bad. Maybe some other time.”
“Maybe. Although these days he’s more interested in golf conditions than his family or friends here.”
I could quite hide the bitterness. Dad had known Megan since she was barely walking, and I was still frustrated with him for skipping this weekend. Mom would have been ashamed of him for prioritizing golf over this wedding.
“He’s not great in large crowds,” I said. “He’s actually not great at all these days. With my mother gone, he only seems to think about himself. It’s… confusing.”
“I bet.” Ronan’s arm tightened around my waist, tugging me into a full embrace as we swayed. “It’s tough when we realize how little our parents actually think of us. Harder when their worst impulses seem to augment as they age.”
That’s not what happened, I wanted to argue while at the same time reminding myself that a wedding would have been hard for Dad. Mom had also known Megan forever, and how could he have come to a wedding and not thought of his own wife, now gone?
“Is that what happened with yours?” I couldn’t help asking instead.
He tensed but gave a curt nod. “My dad’s always been a piece of work.
I told you that. Pitted my siblings and me against each other.
Took his temper out on us in a million different ways.
We’re just mirrors of his success, and if not, his scapegoats.
” He glanced down at me. “Let me guess, you’re wondering why I put up with it. ”
I shook my head. “Not at all. The only people who ask that question are the ones who have good relationships with their parents. They can’t imagine a world otherwise.”
Ronan seemed to relax. “My mother is… well, I don’t know her all that well. She left just after I was born. She decided not to put up with it, I guess. She lives in Portland, actually. Runs a yoga center there.”
“Really? Which one?” I’d been to more than a few trainings in Portland when I was getting my hours to become an instructor.
“Ah, I’m not sure. Something about Lotus and the trees. Or forest. Or something like that.”
“Wait, is your mom Grace Fletcher who owns Lotus Forrest Springs?”
Ronan froze. “You know her?”
I nodded. “Her retreat center is amazing. The hot springs, the vegetarian food. Not to mention she’s a legend in the community. I learned so much when I did a training there a few years ago. Are you going to visit her while you’re here?”
For the first time since I’d met him, Ronan looked genuinely uncomfortable. “I—no, I hadn’t planned on it.”
“Why not? The retreat center is only about three and a half hours from here. You should go see it—it’s really beautiful, and I bet she’d be thrilled to show you what she’s—”
I was interrupted by a hard stamp of a kiss as the arm at my waist lifted me so my toes hovered just above the ground. It only lasted a few seconds, long enough for Ronan to suck my bottom lip hard enough to bite and touch his tongue to mine when my mouth opened beneath his.
When he set me back down, his arm stayed where they were, as if he knew I might need the help to remain standing, breathless as I was.
“What—what was that for?”
“For caring enough to try.” He was now staring at my mouth. “Not a lot of people do.”
I frowned. Didn’t he have a big family? He said his dad was a jerk, but he couldn’t hate all his siblings, could he? At least one of them had to care, too.
“But Laney?”
I blinked. “Huh? What?”
He took my chin and forced my gaze up so our eyes met. “You don’t need to bother, sweetheart. I’m not worth the trouble.”
“You know… I’m not sure I believe that.”
He was so handsome, impeccably groomed, expensively dressed. The kind of man I’d never encounter anywhere else. Men like this didn’t exist in Seattle, where most people thought clothes from REI were the height of fashion. They barely existed anywhere.
I thought back to the way he’d looked when I found him in the hotel room in nothing but his underwear and tousled hair. And then the way he’d looked when he took them off.
Okay, fine. I could admit it.
I wouldn’t mind a little more time with that guy.
Now, his curls tamed into glossy waves with a comb and product.
My fingers tingled to mess them up again.
We swayed to the music, and as I enjoyed the warmth of his big body through our clothes, I couldn’t help wondering how his shoulders would feel under my touch without the layers of wool and cotton.
Hmm. Maybe that had been half a glass of champagne too much.
“Don’t look now, but we have an audience.”
Ronan gave a nearly imperceptible nod to his left, where Derek was glowering at us over his drink. The tip of his nose was red, and his cheeks were flushed. How much had he had?
Who did he think he was to have any right to be angry at me?
He’d been the one who’d broken my heart in the worst way, at the very worst time. What he’d done to me was unforgivable. For him to have the nerve to act like a victim right now was just adding insult to injury.
“You’re pissed,” Ronan remarked.
“I’ll get past it.” I shrugged. “He’s an asshole.”
“An asshole who deserves a taste of his own medicine.” One of Ronan’s dark brows lifted sardonically. “Should we give it to him?”
“How’s that?”
“Like this.”
This time, when he kissed me, he didn’t stop. He slipped one of those broad hands around my neck and plundered.
I knew we had an audience. Derek, Megan, the bridesmaids, countless friends and family members who had known me all my life. All of them wondering who this man was who was sweeping sensible Laney Fisher off her feet and devouring her whole?
“Wait.”
He pulled back, mouth slightly swollen. “What? What is it?”
I stared at my hand, clutching his lapel like it was a life preserver.
He was looking at me like I was water in the freaking desert. Like he would genuinely perish if he didn’t get another drink.
It was dangerous.
But I liked it.
I liked the way Ronan Black looked at me. Not like I was the girl with the heart condition, the shopkeeper, the good daughter, the one who took care of everything. Like I was the version of myself I’d always wanted to be and never could. Like I was fun and carefree and didn’t have to be so rigid.
“Nothing,” I whispered.
This time, I was the one to kiss him.