18. Nate
eighteen
Nate
It’s been twenty-four hours since I asked Lucy Burke to marry me, and she hasn’t spoken a word to me. She barely made eye contact as she took Quinn from my arms yesterday at church. She cuddled and hugged Quinn, who squealed with delight, but she didn’t spare me a single syllable.
Probably a good indication that she’s going to turn me down.
I just hope my proposal for a practical marriage didn’t ruin our newfound level of friendship.
I close my eyes and run a hand down my face as I lean on the counter by the kitchen sink. She’ll be here any minute to babysit Quinn for the day, and I’m afraid she’ll either refuse to speak to me or feel awkward and uncomfortable around me.
After seeing her so weak during her blood sugar crash, I spiraled. If I hadn’t found her when I did—if I didn’t know how to help her—it could have been so much worse. Sleep was a lost cause after that realization.
I couldn’t stop thinking about the very real possibility of her living alone in her apartment after Sloane and Aiden move out, with no one there to help her if her sugar tanks. I found myself wishing she would move in here so I could be there for her if she needed help. So I could take care of her.
The idea of marriage followed soon after, with the added bonus of helping her get the supplies she needs and providing a two-parent home for Quinn.
But that is a lot to put on her. I mean, I’m basically asking her to give up the idea of dating a man and falling in love the traditional way, so that I can take care of her and give Quinn a whole family.
It was stupid. I shouldn’t have proposed this wild idea.
Keys rattle in the front door, and I hear it squeak as it swings open and then closes.
I gave Lucy a key to the house when she first started babysitting, in case she and Quinn had errands to run or wanted to go to the park or something.
A short moment later, she strolls into the kitchen, sets her backpack on the island, and turns to me with the same look of determination she had when she announced that we were going to Hobby Lobby.
“I have a few conditions.”
I raise my brows as my mind scrambles to catch up. She rolls her shoulders and squares them, the only hint I have that her resolve might be a little shaky. I straighten up from my slouched position against the counter. “Conditions?”
Her deep blue eyes widen as they roam my face. “Don’t tell me you’ve changed your mind.”
I clear my throat and shake my head. “No, of course not. I just—it doesn’t matter. What are your conditions?”
She frowns, but goes through her list, counting them off on her fingers.
“I don’t want to feel like you’re babysitting me.
” Her eyes meet mine for a moment, full of the fire she usually aims my direction after I’ve picked on her, like she’s giving me a warning before I have a chance to say something stupid.
“I know you want to do this to help me with my diabetes, but don’t hover and panic at every blood sugar incident. ”
I purse my lips and nod. I can’t promise that I won’t panic, but I can promise that she won’t see me panic.
She keeps her gaze on her fingers, her cheeks tinting pink as she continues, “If anyone asks, this is the real deal. I don’t want anybody to know that this is for healthcare and childcare. If it comes up, we act like we’re madly in love and don’t see a point in waiting.”
I swallow and study her face.
Pretend to be in love with Lucy Burke? If it means I won’t have to worry about her, I’ll figure it out.
I take a couple of long strides across the kitchen, closing the distance between us. “Okay.”
She holds up a third finger, and her voice nearly drops to a whisper. “I want regular date nights.” She tucks her hair behind her ear and bites her lower lip, keeping her gaze as far from mine as she can manage. “I love going on dates, and I don’t want to give up that experience.”
I can’t suppress a smirk as I lean against the island beside her. “As long as you mean dates with me and not some other man—”
Her wide eyes finally meet mine, and she shakes her head. “No. I mean with you.”
My smirk grows into a wide grin. “You want to go on dates with me, Lucinda? I’m flattered.”
She rolls her eyes and holds up a fourth finger, meeting my gaze without an ounce of fear in her deep blue eyes. “I want you to ask my dad.”
My eyes widen, and my insides freeze. “You want me to ask Henry if I can marry you for healthcare and childcare?”
She shakes her head, and the tips of her golden-blonde hair brush against her shoulders, exposed in a sleeveless shirt.
“I want you to ask my dad if you can marry me because you’ve realized, after all the extra time we’ve spent together lately, that you can’t live without me.
I want you to convince him that we’re in love so he’ll give us his blessing and Mom will believe this is real. ”
I clear my throat and scratch the back of my neck. “That’s a pretty tall order, Luce.”
Her eyes dart between mine. “Can you do it or not?”
I draw a deep breath and nod slowly. My stomach churns with nerves about convincing these people I’ve grown up with that now, after years of driving her bananas, I’m so smitten with Lucy that marriage is the next logical step. “Yeah, I’ll figure it out.”
She nods and crosses her arms. “Do you have any conditions?”
I shrug and shake my head, my mind too occupied to think of conditions for myself as I try to make a plan for my conversation with Henry. “Not off the top of my head.”
She purses her lips, her eyes narrowing as they roam my face. “You have to have something.”
I frown and tuck my hands into my pockets. “Why?”
She blows out a long breath and runs a hand through her hair. “I rattled off a list of demands like an entitled princess, and I’m the one who benefits the most from this arrangement.”
I shake my head. “I’m benefiting just as much as you are, if not more.”
The glare she gives me is as familiar as an old friend, and I can’t help but smile. “How do you figure?”
I release a long breath and shrug. “I don’t have to worry about finding someone to stay with Quinn at the last minute if I’m called in on an off day, or who will pick her up from school when she’s older if she needs to leave early and I’m at work.
I don’t have to try to navigate all the uncomfortable conversations that come with raising a girl by myself.
Having you here for her means she gets the stability she needs to heal from the last two months in a healthy way.
It means she won’t have to bounce back and forth between babysitters or daycare facilities.
She’ll be with someone who loves her at all times…
” I draw a deep breath and meet her wide eyes.
“Providing you with access to health insurance is a drop in the bucket compared to what you’re offering me. ”
She tucks her hair behind her ears as she leans back on the island.
I duck to meet her gaze. “You’re not being an entitled princess. I’m agreeing to your conditions because it’s the least I can do for you.”
Her eyes turn glassy, and for a moment I wonder if she’s breathing.
I frown as my eyes dart between hers. “That is, if you still want to do this.”
She blinks, squares her jaw, and nods with a fierce determination. “Yes, I do.”
I raise a brow. “You’re sure? It’s a big ask—a lifetime of putting up with me and raising Quinn.”
Her eyes meet mine, and she nods again. “I’m sure.”
The corner of my mouth lifts in a small smile. “So when is the big day?”
She rolls her lips into her mouth and bites them, then releases them with a puff of breath. “Well, you’re off work next Friday.”
My brows rise again, and I laugh. “You’re that anxious to get me down the aisle, huh?”
She rolls her eyes and shoves my arm, but I stand firmly beside her.
“I’m trying to pick a day that you’re off work, and we could get our families there.
That should give your mom enough time to make us a small cake, and for me to find dresses for everyone.
” She turns to me with a frown. “What are you going to wear?”
I shrug. “Whatever you tell me to, Lucille.”
She narrows her eyes. “That was a dangerous statement, Nathaniel. What if I want you to wear a powder-blue tuxedo?”
I chuckle and raise a brow. “Come on, now. You wouldn’t want your husband to look like an Easter egg. You’d have to look at photos of me in that thing for the rest of your life.”
Her eyes widen as they roam my face. She swallows and nods. “True. I’ll look for something else.”
I sigh and shake my head. “Don’t stress it. I have a couple of suits upstairs. Check them out and see if one of them would work.”
She nods and runs her hand through her hair. “We have a lot to do if we’re going to pull this off.”
“Yeah, do me a favor though.” She frowns, but I continue, “Don’t tell anyone until after I ask your dad.”
She purses her lips. “When are you going to ask him?”
“I don’t think he would appreciate having this conversation over the phone. So, I’ll drop by his office in the morning. I can go on my way home from work if you can stay a little later.”
She nods. “I don’t have to work at the preschool until tomorrow afternoon.”
“Maybe we can go ring shopping when I get back then.”
Her brows rise, and she clears her throat. “I don’t want an engagement ring.”
I frown, stunned. She fawned over Sloane and Vi’s engagement rings. I thought for sure she would be excited to have her own. “You don’t?”
She shakes her head. “Engagement rings are romantic. They’re for people in love. I just want a plain wedding band.”
My eyes roam her face as her jaw clenches, but she avoids meeting my gaze. “You really expect me to believe that you—the kid who wore a ring pop on her left hand and made wedding dresses out of old bed sheets—only want a plain wedding band?”
Her cheeks darken from light pink to bright red, but this flush doesn’t give me the same sense of pride that it typically does. My stomach starts a slow drop as I realize I may have crossed a line.