CHAPTER SEVEN
Edward
I was getting restless. It was getting later and later, but there was still no sign of Cara.
My eyes snagged on Monty Hart, who was chewing on an hors d’oeuvre and blatantly staring at the door. If I could judge whether Cara was coming to the party by his behavior, then I should relax. He was definitely planning on her being here.
I situated myself in a somewhat comfortable chair positioned in a prime spot. It had an unobstructed view of the entryway, but it wasn’t placed where I would be the first person she saw when she walked through the door. I could go relatively unnoticed in my little corner.
As I sat there, I couldn’t help going back to thoughts of Cara and me from our shared past. I held a champagne glass in my hand absently, not drinking, my mind focused deep in my memories. Memories of that ill-fated fourth summer were always bittersweet.
***
Edward, eighteen
Cara and I had stayed in touch with each other throughout our senior year of high school, writing letters, texting, sending emails, FaceTiming, anything and everything we could do to be part of each other’s lives.
Since we were both in boarding schools in the Atlanta area, I did everything I could to see her.
She was always busy with ballet, though.
I had never known how hard dancers worked until now.
It was impressive, and grueling, and sometimes I wondered how she had the drive and ambition to do it. I knew she had the talent.
Her school had performances, of course, and I’d gone to a couple of those. Then she’d gotten an opportunity to be in The Nutcracker at the Fox Theater in Atlanta. She hadn’t been given a featured role, but just to be invited to be a guest dancer in the corps de ballet was thrilling for her.
Lufton and a couple of our other friends went with me to see her. It wasn’t that they wanted to spend an evening at the ballet as much as it was that they wanted to stare at hot ballet dancers, but I had been thankful for the company.
“Damn.” Joseph Haddows, another friend from Wixby, had stared at Cara. “She’s always been hot, but she’s fucking beautiful now.”
“You hitting that?” our friend Tiller had asked, and I wanted to punch him for talking about her like that.
Like she was just some girl. I’d messed around with the girls at school plenty until my junior year.
But, even though Cara and I hadn’t brought up being exclusive at the end of that summer, it would have felt as if I was cheating on her.
So, that year I stayed away from girls at school who liked me.
Before leaving for school this year I’d made sure she knew how serious I was about her, making sure she was my official girlfriend before we’d parted.
Girls I’d messed around with my freshman and sophomore years at school came looking for me again my senior year.
They ignored the fact that I hadn’t touched them my junior year.
They also didn’t care that I told them I had a girlfriend this year.
They’d even said it was no big deal because they had boyfriends back home, too.
That whatever we did could stay a secret between us.
But I stayed away from them. I wasn’t even tempted.
There was no way I’d ever cheat on Cara. And I knew I could trust her, too.
I ignored Tiller, even though there was literally nothing I’d rather do than fuck Cara.
It felt strange calling it that, but I didn’t know what to think of it as.
Making love sounded cheesy, like a Victorian romance novel or something.
But fucking sounded… not quite right. Even though, my God, that’s all I could think about doing with her.
But she wasn’t ready. We’d kissed and fooled around a lot, but that had been it. I was looking forward to the summer.
There was no doubt in my mind that we’d be all over each other then.
And when the summer finally rolled around? I hadn’t been wrong. We’d spent tons of time together that summer after we graduated from high school, but we still hadn’t actually slept together. I didn’t want to pressure her, but I’d been going out of my mind with desire for her.
But that perfect, sun-drenched summer had been about more than sex.
That had been the summer she’d become my best friend, too.
We lay on that floating dock and talked for hours, holding hands and looking up at the stars.
And during the day we’d become champions in the races Orla Whittaker always planned to keep us busy and entertained during those long, hot days of freedom.
Almost daily I would hold Cara on my back for the piggyback races.
Laughing, squeezing her strong arms just a little too tightly around my neck, she’d urge me on.
If it weren’t for her, I don’t think I could have beaten Lufton or Aidan.
Even with her, I wouldn’t have beaten Declan except he always ran after Willa and threw her on his back to make her join in the races.
Whatever time that had taken allowed Cara and me to win most of the time.
We were the champions of the Hargrave-Whittaker family races that summer.
We’d cross the finish line just ahead of everyone else, her screaming encouragement too loudly in my ear.
I loved every minute. We’d fall half the time, her landing on top of me because I would spin in the air to make sure I hit the ground first, never her.
We’d lay there, laughing helplessly while Orla bestowed whatever the prize was that day—a gift card, her strawberry cake, a cheap plastic trophy—whatever it was felt like pure gold because I won it with Cara.
Now here we were, almost at the end of summer. We only had a couple of weeks left to be with each other. And we were spending a lot of that time talking about our future. Neither of us wanted what we had to end.
“So, what you’re saying is, there’s no chance you’ll go anywhere but College of Charleston?” It was hard to get the words out. Cara and I were at an impasse, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that things were ending for us. Or headed there. The thought of losing her was making me sick.
Literally. I’d lost weight because I’d been unable to eat when I thought about us having to leave each other for college.
We were lying on the floating dock in the middle of her parents’ small lake.
At least, I thought it was her parents’.
It could easily belong to the Whittaker family, but the way they all shared everything made it hard to tell where the property lines divided things up.
If there even were any property lines anymore.
Hell, the way she’d described their ancestors, maybe there never had been.
I was flat on my back, arms crossed under my head, as I looked up at the moon.
It was extra bright that night. I tried to ignore the feel of the cool, hard wood of the dock underneath me.
She hadn’t brought towels or a quilt when she’d snuck out of her room.
“Yes,” she said, in her sweet, quiet voice.
Cara didn’t fight or yell. She discussed things calmly.
It was just one of the millions of things I liked about her.
I’d grown up in an environment where my dad yelled, and my mom didn’t say a word.
I didn’t want that for my future. “And you’re saying you won’t go anywhere but Vanderbilt? ” she asked.
I sighed and watched as a cloud rolled over the moon, throwing us into darkness briefly. “It’s not that. I don’t really care about going there. I mean, it’s great, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t feel a real connection there or anything…”
“So, I guess I don’t understand the problem.
I got a full dance scholarship to the school I want to go to, and I’ve already auditioned for a local ballet company they have a partnership with.
I think there’s a good chance I’ll join them in their corps de ballet.
The sooner I can do that, the better chance I’ll have at moving up to a soloist and then a principal dancer one day.
Why would you want me to give that up? You can get a business degree anywhere, Edward. ”
I could hear the frustration in her voice.
I flopped over on my stomach and propped up on my elbows.
“Hey, I’m sorry. I’m not trying to make this any harder than it already is.
My dad wants me at Vandy. He went there, his dad went there, and so on.
It’s a tradition, and he’s set on me going there.
He’s already paid tuition for the year. I doubt he can get it back.
Plus, it’s not like I can get in to College of Charleston this close to the start of the semester.
I’m sure their application deadline was back in the winter. ”
“Same for Vandy. Even if I was willing to give up my scholarship, there’s no way they’d accept me at the last minute.
Vanderbilt is definitely a school you have to plan ahead to apply to.
If we wanted to go off to college together, we should have started planning for it at least a year ago.
” Cara sat up and wrapped her arms around her knees.
“So, this is it, huh? Do you think we’re going to be…
over after this summer? When we say goodbye for college, we’re saying goodbye to each other? Forever?”
I moved over to her. “I don’t want that. Not at all. What if I go to Vandy for my freshman year, then I transfer?”
“You would do that?” Her big green eyes looked extra bright and suspiciously shiny. I didn’t want to see her cry.
“Hell, yes. I want to be with you.” I pulled her to me. We sat like that for a while, just holding each other.
“I want to be with you, too,” she finally said. She leaned her head on my shoulder.
“Then I’m going to do everything I can to make that happen,” I said. I was determined. Maybe it was time to stand up to my father.
***