Chapter Fifteen
Harlyn
Janene was sitting at her drafting table, doodling. I had learned over the last few weeks that this was something she did when she was nervous or working through a problem, but I couldn’t figure out what she was trying to work through. I knew it wasn’t the presentation, because after our meeting with Madeline the day before we’d spent the rest of that day and most of our morning finalizing those details. There were a few things we still needed to incorporate but there wasn’t anything major.
Our technical drawings and specs were perfect. The 3D rendering was flawless. The first part of the next week would be spent finalizing the smaller outdoor details on the scale model before we packed it up and shipped it. There were a few of the walkways and outdoor therapy spaces that needed polishing but for the most part it was done too. Janene had even made a list of extra material to take with us in case there were issues with the shipment.
This was a big project and a huge deal for such a small firm but I couldn’t imagine with all of Janene’s experience that she was this nervous over the pitch. I wondered if her nerves had more to do with the fact that we were making the trip together. Things between us had moved fast. I wasn’t experienced in these kinds of arrangements but I knew that sleepovers were not typical, at least that wasn’t how they were done in the movies. So, taking a three-day trip together, when we were only a few weeks into our affair and had yet to really set any boundaries, even I knew this was a huge deal. I just kept reminding myself that this was business, not romance. I knew Madeline would book us each our own room so we didn’t even have to stay in the same bed if we didn’t want to. It may have been unspoken but I understood that what we were doing was just fun and it wasn’t going anywhere because Janene wasn’t the relationship type and I wasn’t planning to stick around past the summer internship. Still, there was something overwhelming about the trip.
I stood up from the sofa where I had been watching Janene and I walked over to where she was sitting. She was wearing another red shirt and it was only then that I realized this was a Friday pattern. The shirt she was wearing was a nice button-down collared shirt, different from the blouse she wore on the Friday of my orientation. It was different from the red polo she had on the week before and the red t-shirt from the week before that, but they were all still the same color. She obviously owned an entire collection of this shade of red shirts. This style looked the best on her, but the color made her look a sickly yellow and I hated that.
I leaned against her and kissed her cheek. Her office door was closed and it wasn’t like we hadn’t engaged in heavy make out sessions during work hours before, but there was still something thrilling about stealing that first kiss. She looked up from the perfect circles she was drawing and smiled.
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news,” I said. “But someone needs to tell you that this color washes you out.”
I ran my hand down the front panel of buttons on her shirt. “We should get it off of you right away.”
Janene clutched my wrist the way she had done the first time I tried to touch her. It didn’t hurt but it was firm, meant to make a point. She didn’t say anything. She didn’t even look at me. Her eyes were closed and she was trying to steady her breathing.
“Janene?”
She didn’t move.
“Hey, are you okay?”
She took a deep breath and the grip on my wrist loosened. She opened her eyes but they still never met mine. She looked down at my arm and released it as if she was surprised by her own action.
“I’m fine,” she said.
I took her face in my hands and made her look at me. “You’re not fine. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, I’m sorry. I didn’t hurt you, did I?” She rubbed her thumbs over my wrist.
“No, of course not.”
She leaned forward and kissed me. Soft and yet deep. Her hands found my hips and she brought me closer. When we broke apart, I could see a small amount of fear in her eyes. It was almost imperceivable and may have been something I might not have noticed before but now that I knew Janene on a different level, those tiny changes were paramount to me.
“Why do you always wear red on Fridays?” I pushed.
She blinked twice and then shook her head as if she was coming out of a daze. “What?”
“On Fridays, you always wear a red shirt. Why?”
“It’s a show of support for our troops overseas,” she said. Her words were void of any emotion like a line she’d memorized and was now reciting. “It’s a tradition started in ’05. Red stands for Remember Everyone Deployed.”
She stood up from her stool and looked around like she was trying to decide on her next move. Her words had been so matter-of-fact I wasn’t even sure if she knew she’d said them out loud. I placed my hands on her shoulders and eased her back into her seat.
“Look at me,” I said.
She finally did. She leaned her forehead against mine. She didn’t say anything else and I was sure I didn’t need to push her any further. Her years in the service were something she never talked about. Even as a kid, there was just something about that topic that was off limits. There were only three times in my entire life that I remembered seeing Janene in uniform. The first time, I was eleven. Mom had gotten into a fender-bender, as Janene explained it, and she’d picked all of us kids up from school. I remember not recognizing her at first. Her demeanor, her voice, it all seemed so out of character. She dropped us off at home and told us not to get into any trouble, then she returned about an hour later with mom. By then she’d changed into civilian clothes. I always wondered if she’d changed because she knew I was intrigued by this different Janene or if it was just that she didn’t like being in uniform outside of work.
I asked mom about the uniform and all she said was that I was not to mention it to Janene or ask any questions. A few years later, Mom and I snuck into an event that was honoring our Desert Storm troops. When Mom found out that Janene was being presented with a medal and that she had insisted that we not go, Renee concocted a plan for us to be there and not be seen. Somehow, we landed on the guest list and were allowed in, but we sat in the very back row for the ceremony and then never spoke of it again. Janene was in what I later learned was her Class A uniform. It was the first time I had ever seen her in a skirt. I was mesmerized by her stoic presence. Mom shed a few tears and then as the evening moved on to a more social event we snuck out and went home. I was instructed to never mention that we’d been there.
When I was fifteen, we ran into Janene at the grocery store and it was obvious that she had not expected to see us any more than we had expected to see her. This time I was even more impressed by how sharp she looked in her combat uniform. But just like the first time I saw her in that uniform, her demeanor was off. That was probably around the time I first realized that I had a crush on Janene because even though her personality was different, I couldn’t stop thinking about how great she looked. I secretly hoped to see her in uniform again but it never happened.
There was a knock on the door that made us both jump before Madeline walked in.
“Hey guys,” she said.
She looked back and forth between us. You didn’t have to be an expert to know that there was a heavy dose of tension in the room.
“Hey,” Janene said.
She turned back toward her drawing board and looked at Madeline. I took another step back to put some extra distance between us.
“Just wanted to check in.”
“Perfect timing,” Janene said. “I have a question for you on the reflection pool option for the meditation space.”
I looked down at Janene’s board and realized she wasn’t just drawing perfect circles she was trying to simulate water ripples in a pond.
“The 3D design is great but I don’t like the insert that we built for the model,” she said.
Madeline walked over to the model that was sitting on a table near the sofa. The client had asked for an option that used a section of the first floor as a meditation space. We’d created a small reflection pool that featured a view of Pikes Peak in the background but Janene was right, the insert we were using to present this feature looked subpar. It looked like a cheap plastic pool you might find in a Barbie doll house. It was not saying state of the art.
“What material did we use to convey the water?” Madeline asked.
“Liquid resin. It’s what I’ve always used, but I’ve never been worried about the aesthetics because we usually only create pools and no one needs to see the calming effect of a pool.”
“That’s a good point,” Madeline said.
“Maybe we’re looking at this wrong,” I said. “Do we really need circular water ripples? I know in the digital image we went with the typical Zen Garden feel, but the truth is there won’t be anything dropping into the water to create that effect. Not in the real world. What if we just used a plastic river overlay. We can use a slightly darker blue for the mold and then overlay gentle ripples that flow across the entire pool. Like they will when the water circulates.”
I pulled up my phone and found a picture of a water feature I had created for a design class the year before.
“See,” I said. “These lines run up and down because my feature is a water fall, but if we find an overlay that’s a little gentler and lay it flat, it gives the reflection pool some dimension but it doesn’t promise rings or splashes.”
Janene took my phone in her hand and looked at the image. She zoomed in and zoomed out, turned it sideways and then did the same.
“I don’t know,” she said. “I’d have to see it for myself. I feel like this is really cheesy.”
My face went hot. No one had ever called my work cheesy. She handed my phone back and then smiled.
“I’m kidding,” she said. “I think it’s worth a try. Let’s do a resin pour tonight in something closer to midnight blue. We’ll let it set over the weekend so it will be ready to play with on Monday. I don’t want to mess with what we have because even if we can’t find the right feel, we still need to present something.”
Madeline nodded. “I think that’s a great idea. I’ll locate the right sheets and make sure we have them here by Monday. Good work team.”
She looked between us again but didn’t say anything else. She turned and walked out of Janene’s office.
“I’ll go work on the resin pour. What are the dimensions of the current mold?” I asked.
“Four by six.”
I walked to the door but stopped before I opened it.
“Janene?”
She looked up from whatever she had been scribbling. “I’m fine,” she said. Her eyes were shining again, no fear, no anger, not even a hint of sadness was reflecting back at me.
“Are you coming over to my mom’s tomorrow?” I asked.
“I’m thinking about it.” She shrugged but the grin on her face said she would be there.