Chapter 15
Chapter Fifteen
Lilly
“Lilly?”
The shock on Tessa’s face when she opens the door to me just over an hour later tells me she had no clue this was coming either.
“What are you?—”
“He fired me,” I say, the words flat. “I don't have anywhere to go.”
“What?” She shakes her head, but thankfully doesn’t press. Instead, she steps aside, immediately pulling the door wider. “Come in. God, you’re freezing. It’s miserable out there.”
The biting winter wind claws at my back as I step inside, but I hardly feel the cold until the warmth hits me. There’s an early winter storm building outside. Driving the short distance down the mountain to Tessa and Holt’s cabin was almost all I could manage with the whipping snow.
But in Tessa’s cabin, everything is warm, quiet, and safe.
My fingers are numb, my cheeks stinging, but it’s not until the door closes behind me that the rest of it starts to sink in.
He fired me.
I don’t have anywhere to go. I don’t have a job.
I don’t have him.
That’s the part that hurts the most.
It feels impossible that only a few hours ago I’d woken up thinking that things were…that we were something.
Now, all I can think of is the look on Luke’s face when he told me that we’d run our course. The cold, indifferent way he’d sent me away as if I was nothing. As if what we’d shared together was nothing.
I choke on a sob, and immediately my hand flies to my mouth, but it’s too late.
Tessa sees it.
I can tell by the way her expression shifts. Both softening and sharpening with understanding all at once.
I don’t have to say anything.
She knows this isn’t about losing my job.
Not even close.
Lilly
Tessa insisted I have a warm bath and get into a change of clothes. I didn’t have the strength to argue while she ran the hot water, poured in bubbles as if I were a child, and brought me a mug of peppermint tea before leaving me alone.
I sink into the steamy bubbles and try to let myself disappear into the quiet, leaving everything else outside.
I try to pretend that the last few weeks didn't happen.
But the thoughts creep in anyway.
Luke’s voice.
His kisses.
The way he held me. The way he touched me.
The way I was so sure it was love between us.
The cold look he gave me this morning.
The way he turned away from me without a look back.
I squeeze my eyes shut and sink under the water as if I can drown it all out.
It doesn’t work.
Nothing does.
By the time I finally pull myself out of the water, my skin is flushed, and the cold has pushed from my bones. The ache in my chest is still there though, as I dress in cozy sweatpants and a matching hoodie Tessa left for me.
When I open the door and step into the hallway, the cabin is quiet.
I hear the voices as I get closer to the kitchen. Soft and muffled.
Heated.
I freeze.
“I’m telling you. Something’s not right,” Tess says, her voice tight with frustration.
I don’t move.
“He wouldn’t talk to me,” she goes on. “Not really. He just shut me down the way he always does when it’s something that really matters.”
“Maybe he’s handling it his way.” Holt’s voice is calmer, steadier. But even I can hear the doubt in it.
“You know that’s not true.” Tessa struggles to keep her voice low. “You know him as well as I do,” she continues. “Maybe even better. Besides, you saw them last night, too.”
“I did,” he agrees. “Maybe you’re right.”
“Of course I’m right.”
There’s a pause, and I can picture Tessa pacing the floor in the kitchen the way she always does when she gets worked up about something.
“Something is going on,” she says. “And it’s about a lot more than just a job. She wouldn’t have shown up here like that if this were just about work.” Her voice softens. “You should have seen her face, Holt. She’s heartbroken.”
The pain in Tessa’s own voice almost makes me cry again. I press my fist to my mouth and swallow it down.
“What did he say when you asked him?”
“It’s more about what he didn’t say,” Tessa explains. “He just kept insisting that he didn't need an assistant and even if he did, he would never allow himself to hire one because he couldn’t be a good boss. He doesn’t have it in him.”
I frown, my breath catching.
He said that?
“Wait,” Holt says. “He actually said that? Those words?”
There’s a beat of silence. Tessa must nod.
“I see.”
“What exactly do you see?”
I hold my breath.
“There’s something between them.”
“I already know that,” Tessa snaps. “I literally just said that.”
“Right, but he’s trying to shut it down,” Holt continues. “And not because it’s nothing.”
My heart slams against my ribs.
“Then, why?” Tessa demands.
Another pause and then…
“He thinks he’s protecting her.”
His words steal the breath from my lungs.
“From what?”
“From himself,” Holt says simply. “Luke doesn’t think he’s good enough for her. He wouldn’t. Not after…well, not after the way things ended with Cheryl. And you,” he adds gently.
My memory flashes back to the conversation we had about Luke’s ex—Tessa’s mom—and how things ended. My heart squeezes. It’s hard to breathe.
“But that means…” Tessa’s voice is soft, like she’s just working it out in her head. “That he must really care about her.”
It’s not a question, but it might as well be. Because if he did really care about me, he wouldn’t have hurt me the way he did.
“I think so,” Holt says. “So in his mind, the only way to protect her is to make sure she doesn’t stay.”
Something inside me breaks.
And that’s exactly what it feels like.
Broken.
Silence falls between them. I slump against the wall, whatever energy I had left seeping from my body.
Because now I know.
I wasn’t wrong. I didn’t imagine it. It was real.
And he ended it anyway.
He felt all the same things I did. The connection between us. The…love.
And he still chose to break me.
A sob builds in my chest, sharp and uncontrollable, it threatens to burst free. I clamp my hand over my mouth and force myself to back away down the hallway before it can escape.
I can’t let myself cry. Once I start, I won’t be able to stop.
No.
I need to get away.
I need to get out of here. I can’t stand here and listen to them dissect my life and what I finally thought was love like it was some mistake Luke needed to fix.
It hurts too much.
I have to go.
I turn, moving quickly now, needing to grab my bags and get as far away as I can before anyone sees me fall apart.
A hard knock sounds at the front door.
I freeze in the hallway outside the bedroom, one hand pressed to the wall.
Another knock comes, heavier this time, followed by the scrape of boots on the porch.
“I’ve got it,” Holt says.
I should keep moving. I should go straight to the bedroom, get my things, and leave while they’re distracted.
Instead, I stay exactly where I am. What if it’s Luke?
The front door opens, and a blast of cold air rolls through the cabin hard enough to make me shiver, even from down the hall.
“Road’s getting bad,” an unfamiliar voice says.
“Cal.” Holt sounds surprised. “You drove up in this?”
“Didn’t have much choice.” The man steps inside, bringing the storm with him. “I was already in town. Grabbed more diesel for the generators in case the storm gets worse. Thought you might need some.”
Cal.
The name catches in my mind, and I remember Luke saying it at the dinner table.
Cal still goes down there sometimes.
Enough that when he says the Rusty Nail is getting rougher, I listen.
I press myself closer to the wall, staying tucked back in the hallway where they can’t see me. I should go. I know I should. But something about hearing his name keeps me rooted to the spot. Besides, as long as he’s here, I’m trapped.
“How bad is it?” Tessa asks, joining them.
“Bad enough.” There’s the sound of him kicking snow off his boots. “Worse past the bend. Wind’s cutting across the open stretch hard enough to push a truck if you’re not paying attention.”
A chill moves through me that has nothing to do with the cold air creeping down the hallway.
“I don’t like the sound of that,” Tessa says.
“You shouldn’t.”
There’s nothing dramatic in Cal’s voice. No warning for the sake of warning. He says it like a man giving facts, and somehow that makes it worse.
“Luke know you’re here?” Holt asks.
“No. Was going to stop on the way by to see if he needed fuel, too.”
“You haven’t talked to him today?”
A pause follows. Not long, but long enough for me to notice.
“No,” Cal says finally. “Why?”
Tessa lowers her voice, but not enough. “There’s been…a situation.”
“With Luke?”
“With Lilly.”
My stomach clenches.
I should move. I should stop listening. But I can’t make myself do it.
Another pause.
“The girl staying with him?” Cal asks.
“He fired her,” Tessa says, and there’s anger in her voice now. “And he sent her here in the middle of a storm.”
“He did what?”
Cal doesn’t raise his voice, but something in it changes.
“Yeah,” Holt says. “That was pretty much my reaction, too.”
“Haven’t talked to him much,” Cal says, “But I got the impression…well…I thought that he was…with her…ya know.”
“Yeah,” Holt says. “We did too.”
“We still do,” Tessa says quickly.
“Where is she?”
“In the bath,” Tessa says. “Warming up. She was half frozen by the time she got here.”
I look toward the bathroom door at the end of the hall, my pulse climbing. They still think I’m in there. Good. That means I can leave before they realize I’m not.
“Luke know she made it here?” Cal asks.
“I called him,” Tessa says. “He’s shut down.”
“He usually is when it matters.”
“Cal,” Holt says.
“What?” His voice doesn’t rise. “You want me to lie?”
No one says anything.
Neither do I.
Because whatever else Luke is, Cal isn’t wrong.
This morning, Luke looked me straight in the eye and made it clear there was nothing left to talk about.
There was no explanation, no softness. No…no room for me at all. Like, I didn’t matter, and I never did.
I swallow hard and press my hand against the wall to steady myself.
Then Cal speaks again, and I forget how to breathe.