Chapter 3 #3
“Look, I know this seems like it’s a lot.
And you’ve got more than enough on your plate right now with your dad and everythin’.
I just want you to know that whatever happens, my intentions are true.
I don’t want anythin’ more out of this than you’re willin’ to give me.
There aren’t any ulterior motives. This is just—”
“You marryin’ me to make my dad happy,” I say, half-heartedly because unexpectedly, I’m actually seeing that Jude’s actually a good guy. Then again, did I really think Dad—or Derrick, for that matter—would let this happen otherwise?
And just like earlier with my big brother, I can see something else working behind Jude’s gentle smile. Am I missing something here?
“OK,” I say, closing the distance between us. I lean over his shoulder to grab a pen. Except when I do, my hip brushes past his arm and tingles course through me; hot, undeniable, can’t ignore ones, making my breath catch. What I don’t expect is for him to feel it too.
Quickly grabbing what I was looking for—and trying to distract myself from whatever that just was—I straighten, putting much needed space between us at the same time Jude slides his chair back to give me room.
“We just sign this thing and it’s done?” I ask, feeling his eyes on me.
“Yeah. Micah Johnson is a friend of the family and he works out of City Hall when he’s in town. My sister-in-law, Birdie, works for him.”
“I know Birdie. She was ahead of me at school I think.”
He nods. “Yeah, her and Isla. Birdie’s married to Will and Isla is married to Case.”
“Ah. Best friends marryin’ brothers. It totally fits,” I say with a smile.
“Yeah. Works for them.” He looks down at the paper. “He was able to put this together at short notice for us. He also said he can lodge it as soon as I get it back to him.”
I nod, signing my name and dating it before handing it back to Jude. “Your turn I guess.” He slides the chair close again, taking the paper and pen from me. His fingers graze mine and again I feel the same buzz under my skin as before.
This time I catch the barest of flashes in his gaze before he leans forward and signs on the dotted line. He definitely felt it too.
When he looks back up at me, I catch the light shimmering in the amber flecks of his eyes and for a moment I’ve captivated. “Done.” Why does it feel like that word means more than either of us think it does?
After staring at each other for an untold length of time, a laugh from the hallway snaps us out of it. All of a sudden the air between us is thick and things feel stilted and a little awkward again. Or maybe that’s just me…
“Right,” I say, standing straight again and taking a step back, something that feels a lot harder to do than it’s supposed to. “I guess I better finish gettin’ ready so that we can get this show on the road.”
The light in Jude’s eyes dims at my words but he quickly schools his expression and shoots me a tight smile. Rising to his feet, he nods my way. “I’ll leave you to it, I guess.” He walks over to the door and pulls it open. “I’ll see you out there?”
“Yep. I’ll be the girl in white,” I joke, but it’s half-hearted because suddenly it’s like the comfortable ease we’d somehow found has vanished into thin air. Jude seems to have shut down a little, shuttering himself away. And why is that bothering me so much?
“I’ll be the man in black waitin’ for you,” he says, lifting his chin my way before stepping out of my room and closing the door behind him.
I walk over to the mirror and stare at myself, trying to collect my thoughts and work out exactly why I’m feeling like I just screwed something up.
Shaking my head, I focus on the job at hand.
Earrings—blue, from Ma. Thankfully that also takes care of the somethin’ old requirement.
As for new, my white cowboy boots are unworn.
All that’s left is something borrowed. Looking over to my desk, I see another envelope Jude must’ve left behind, except this one has my name on it.
Curiosity piqued, I walk over and sit down, grabbing it and pulling out the letter inside along with a gorgeous hairpin with a silver daisy on it. It’s clearly vintage and must hold some significance. I unfold the piece of paper, suddenly desperate to know what it says.
Em,
I know today will end a lot differently than how we thought it would.
I’ve always imagined that my wedding day would be the first of what I know will be the best days of my life. Because of this, I want to make my own promise to you outside of the vows we’re about to say in front of our families.
Please know I will always be by your side. Whatever you need, whatever you want, I will never stop trying to give it to you.
From the moment you pledge your life to mine, I will be your person and you’ll be mine. My vows will become my truth, my oath, and my life mission from the moment we’re declared husband and wife.
There is still a lot—OK, everything—to learn about each other, and this is somewhat of an unconventional way to meet your partner, but I want to start it as I mean to finish… honestly and committed in every possible way.
Please trust that I’m going into this with an open heart and open mind. All I ask is for you to be open to doing the same.
Lastly, please accept a wedding gift from this groom to his bride. I found out today that it has been in the family for generations.
This hairpin was worn by the original Marion Wilson on her wedding day to the love of her life and our great, great, great—OK, maybe too many greats—grandfather, Henley. I even carry his name like you carry hers, so sharing this heirloom seems meant to be.
My eyes fill with unshed tears that threaten to ruin my makeup. But even knowing the rest of the letter might be my undoing, I keep reading.
Will gave it to me today along with an envelope with my name on it he’d found in amongst my grandfather’s things. There was also an old shoebox of journal entries and letters from the original Henley Cooper and Marion Wilson with it. One day, I hope we can have the chance to read them together.
What on earth am I supposed to do with that? How can a total stranger have me ready to run the other way and want to hand over my heart in the same breath?
I give you this hairpin as a symbol of my promise to you.
You have your brothers, and that’ll never change. I want you to know that you will also have me, someone chosen for you. Someone who is choosing you knowing what this means.
OK. Now what does that mean?
You never have to walk or feel alone again if you choose not to. As long as you have this, we’ll both know that I’m yours.
J.
My heart kicks a beat against my ribs and my body no longer feels like it’s my own. For the briefest of moments I wonder if I should go through with this now that I know how honest and sincere and good of a man Jude Cooper is.
Then again, would I have said yes if I hadn’t sensed that already?
Holding the hairpin between my thumb and index finger, marveling at the history and the connection I feel to it. I may not be a Wilson by blood but not once has anyone in this family made me feel like I didn’t belong.
Moments later, I fold his letter and slide it back into the envelope before stowing it away in my desk drawer.
Then I’m standing in front of my bedroom mirror again, sliding the silver hairpin with two white daisies on it into place on the side of my head, the daisy shining back at me like a beacon calling me home.
An anchor to the past, my present, and—I guess—my future. Or at least, my present future where I walk out into the living room and give my dad the only thing he’s ever asked of me.
Whatever happens after that is a problem for later.
Besides, it’s not like this is a real wedding.
Jude Cooper must’ve woven some sort of spell over me in the short time we just spent together. Because there’s no way I won’t do this. Lucky it’s not real, huh?
Except why is there suddenly a small part of me that wishes it could be?