Chapter 19
HAZEL
There are still times when I think I must be living in a dream.
Like tonight, crowded on one of the couches in Enzo and Winter’s living room with Alec squished next to me, his arm looped around my shoulder and his thigh flush against mine.
Every so often, we’ll exchange a tender kiss or a soft look that reminds me of how lucky I am.
Of how, if this is a dream, I never want to wake up from it.
All it takes is a glance around the room to emphasize how different this Christmas Eve is from the last.
Rather than spending the evening alone, I’m surrounded by friends.
Instead of looking at the tiny tree I used to put up out of obligation, my eyes are drawn to the giant pine standing tall in the corner of the room, resplendent with hundreds of lights and gleaming bulbs in a rainbow of colors.
Last year, I spent Christmas Eve playing Tenebris Veil while a fake fire played on the TV. In contrast, this year a fire crackles cheerfully in the fireplace, catching sparks and giving off a comforting, earthy scent that blends with the cinnamon-scented diffuser Winter set on the mantle.
Beneath the tree, dozens of packages sit waiting—not just for Winter and Enzo to unwrap together tomorrow morning, but for tonight as part of the official Green Mountain Guardians Christmas Eve gift exchange.
Last year, I couldn’t bring myself to admit how lonely I was.
This year, I’m the furthest thing from it.
I have Alec. I have friends who are quickly becoming like sisters and brothers. I have plans for the holiday, rather than spending the empty hours waiting for Christmas to be over. I have my own tree—or our tree, I should say—waiting back at home, with plenty of gifts set around it.
I have traditions again, like eating mountains of cookies while watching Elf and taking the snowmobile tour through Santa’s Wonderland on Max’s property.
Oh, and sex by the tree. That might be my favorite tradition of all of them. With Alec’s muscles all golden and glowy from the lights casting over them and stars in his eyes as he gazes at me…
“What are you smiling about?” Alec asks. He puts his hand on my leg and gives it a gentle squeeze.
“What?” Caught mid-fantasy, my cheeks warm. “Was I?”
Alec grins. “You were. And you had this dreamy sort of look in your eyes. Like you were someplace else.”
“Oh.”
“What were you thinking about?”
“Um.” I throw a quick glance around the room before I reply in an undertone, “I was thinking about you. By the tree.”
“Oh.” His voice deepens. Heat flares in his eyes. “You were, were you?” His hand inches up my leg, moving dangerously close to the apex of my thighs. “And what was I doing?”
He knows exactly what he was doing. But I still reply quietly, “You were naked. And all glowy. From the lights.”
Alec dips his head to speak near my ear. “Was that all? Or was I doing something to you?”
“I hadn’t gotten that far yet. I was still thinking about you.”
His lips quirk. “All glowy, you mean?”
“Yes.” I swat his arm. “Laugh if you want. But it’s sexy.”
His expression sobers. “If you like it, Haze, we can keep the tree up all year.”
I give the idea a moment’s thought. “No. That would be weird. We’ll just have to come up with something new once Christmas is over.”
He kisses my cheek. “Like Valentine’s lights?”
“Hmm. Red lights? I’m not sure if that would have the same effect.”
“We can have any color you like.” In a conspiratorial tone, he adds, “I think you look very sexy all naked and glowy, too.”
My belly clenches. An ache throbs deep inside me. In a hoarse whisper, I say, “Maybe when we get home? We could be all naked and glowy together?”
“Haze.” Alec drags me onto his lap. His arousal prods at me, hard and insistent. “What are you doing to me?”
I widen my eyes at him. “You asked.”
“What are you two doing over there?” Ronan asks. From his seat in the recliner by the fireplace, he gives us a knowing smirk. “Talking about anything interesting?”
Alec makes a face at him. “Nothing you need to know about.”
“They’re talking about couple-y things,” Winter interjects. She takes a sip of her eggnog and sets the glass back onto the coffee table. “Just like you’ll be doing soon, Ronan.”
Knox drags his attention away from the Christmas Story marathon playing on TV. “Ronan. Did you meet someone and I didn’t hear about it?”
Lark brightens. “Did you? Who? Is she local? Do I know her?”
“No.” Ronan shakes his head. “No woman. And I’m not looking for one, either.”
“I was just speculating,” Winter explains. “Since the rest of the guys all found someone, I figure it’s Ronan’s turn.”
“I’m not the last single one,” Ronan retorts. He angles his head towards Max, who’s standing over by the snack table with a cookie frozen halfway to his mouth. “Max is single, too. So maybe he’ll find someone next.”
“I don’t think so,” Max replies. He pops the cookie into his mouth and chews. Once he swallows, he adds, “Some of us are happier being single.”
But he doesn’t look very happy as he says it.
“I thought I was happier being single,” Alec says. His lips press to the top of my head. “But really, I just hadn’t met the right woman yet.” After a pause, he amends, “Well. I had met her. I just hadn’t pulled my head out of my ass and asked her out yet.”
“That’s not true.” I stroke his stubbly cheek. “You didn’t think I was interested.”
“But it all worked out, didn’t it?” Rory looks up from the floor, where she’s petting Enzo and Winter’s dogs, Rusty and Comet. “Sometimes you have to wait for the right moment. Just like Gage and I did.”
Gage leans over to kiss Rory. As he looks at her, his love is a visible thing. “It’s true. Sometimes you don’t know what you have until you realize you might lose it.”
“What about Sage?” Lark asks Max. “I saw the two of you at Breakfast Bliss a couple of weeks ago.”
Poor Max looks like a deer caught in the headlights. He’s probably regretting accepting Enzo’s Christmas Eve invitation. “We just ran into each other. It was nothing.”
“I’m glad you guys all found someone,” Ronan says. “But I’ve done the whole relationship thing already. I have no interest in trying it again.” A beat later, he adds in a more cheerful tone, “Anyway. It’s Christmas Eve. Aren’t we supposed to be opening presents?”
“Of course.” Winter hops up from her seat and hurries over to Ronan. Then she hugs him as she says, “Sorry, Ro. I shouldn’t be pushing you. As long as you’re happy…”
He pats her back. “I am. Don’t worry.”
Once she releases Ronan, she crosses the room to hug Max as well. “Sorry,” she repeats. “I get a little carried away with the whole matchmaking thing sometimes.”
Max gives her a quick squeeze. “No worries. I appreciate the thought.”
“Did they try to set you up, too?” I ask Alec. Jealousy stabs through me at the thought of Winter or Lark or even Rory pushing another woman on him. Encouraging him to go out with some other beautiful woman.
“Oh, we had our eyes on you,” Lark answers. “Even if Alec didn’t want to admit it, we could tell he had feelings for you.”
My lips curve into a smile. “You could tell?”
Alec kisses my forehead. “Apparently, I wasn’t quite as good at hiding it as I thought I was.”
My heart swells. “Well, you don’t have to hide it anymore.”
His gaze goes soft. “No. I don’t.”
“Okay,” Enzo interrupts. “Now that Ronan’s mentioned it, why don’t we do the presents? Then we can have dinner—”
“Dinner?” Max asks. He glances at the table in front of him. It’s loaded with three kinds of cookies, two large bowls of chips, a seven-layer dip, pigs in blankets, mini quiches, and a heaping plate of cut vegetables. “I thought this was dinner.”
“Oh, no,” Winter replies. “I have food in the oven. There’s a cheeseburger casserole and roasted vegetables, plus Lark brought over Cuban sliders, Rory made Swedish meatballs, and Hazel made a Christmas pasta salad.”
“Plus dessert,” Enzo adds. His expression lights up. “We got one of those Christmas logs from Decadent Delights. And two kinds of pie.”
My stomach gives an eager rumble. I skipped lunch in anticipation of the feast tonight, and the very mention of food is enough to get it going.
Alec splays his hand across my belly. “Hungry?”
“A little.”
He kisses my cheek. “Make sure you eat plenty.” Dropping his voice, he continues, “So you have energy for later.”
“You guys.” Lark beams at us. “You’re so cute. I just knew you two would be perfect together.”
“Okay. Presents,” Enzo announces. He heads over to the tree and grabs an armful of boxes from beneath it.
As he begins handing them out, Winter exclaims, “Wait! I forgot something!”
Enzo gives her a puzzled look. “What?”
She grins as she hurries towards the stairs. “You’ll see.”
Less than a minute later, Enzo’s wearing a velvet Santa hat with a giant pompom at the end of it. It has little bells attached, so every time Enzo moves, he makes a jingling sound. He shakes his head at Winter, but he’s smiling as he does it.
“Another bet?” Alec asks.
“Not this time.” Enzo eyes Alec’s sweater. It’s bright red with a sequined tree appliqued onto it. “What about you?”
Alec glances down at his sweater, and then at the matching one I’m wearing. “No bet. We just thought it would be a fun tradition.”
Out of the blue, my throat goes thick.
I hoped. But I never really thought it would happen.
“Here,” Enzo says as he hands a large box to Alec. Then he gives me a slightly smaller one. “And here’s yours, Hazel.”
“It’s from me,” Gage calls over. He grins. “I hope you like it.”
I turn over the gaily wrapped present in my hands. “I’m sure I will,” I tell him.
While I’m still picking at the edges of the paper, Alec tears into his gift. Then he stares at the contents for a few seconds before bursting out laughing.