Saylor James
The apartment is quiet without my roommates here. It’s the kind of quiet that wriggles and buzzes beneath my skin, like a bug trapped beneath a cup. With our busy schedules, it’s fairly rare that all of us are home at the same time during the semester. But usually someone is here.
Not tonight, though. It’s the day after Thanksgiving, and all of my roommates are off with their boyfriends.
Yesterday I spent the holiday with Jasmine’s family.
It was loud and chaotic and wonderful. I felt filled up with food and joy.
But now I’m alone, and there’s a cavern inside of me.
And within that cavern are shadows that whisper I’m running out of time and something must be wrong with me, that’s why all my friends have boyfriends and I don’t.
I shuffle my note cards, the glittery ink on them sparkling in the light.
Studying usually helps take my mind off things, but it’s not working so well tonight.
I grab my phone off the coffee table and send a text to the one person who might be able to help.
Even though I know I shouldn’t rely on him so much.
Saylor: Are you busy right now?
Graham: Come over.
A small tired smile stretches my lips. Graham doesn’t waste words, and he despises texting. He’d rather get to the point. It’s one of the things I love about him, even if it is so contrary to how I am.
I pack up my study materials and pull my backpack over my shoulder. I’ll probably end up studying while Graham paints or draws in his makeshift studio. He won’t say much of anything, but being near him will quiet all the noise. And that’s all I need right now.