9. 13 November 1811 #2
Miss Elizabeth swiftly followed his words, saying, “Miss Bingley, I admire that you use the word flit for journeys from fifty to more than one hundred miles away. I believe many people—even those not inconvenienced with fathers who rarely leave their own library and never leave their home county—would struggle with such lengthy journeys. You are enviably sanguine about lengthy travels.”
Miss Bingley ignored her brother’s words and preened at Miss Elizabeth’s.
“Indeed, I congratulate myself on my tolerance of long rides. In truth, my ease is only possible because our barouche-landau is so very comfortable! If your father ever softens his attitude regarding travel, you should get one…if you could manage such.”
Darcy felt a gush of appreciation. He truly felt that both his good friend and a lady who barely knew him saw his discomposure, did not know the reason for it, but still attempted to make him feel better.
He nodded at Bingley and then towards Miss Elizabeth. She was not bothering to respond to Miss Bingley’s latest slight, but instead seemed to be watching him, and he mouthed the words, “Thank you.”
She smiled, and his heart raced. He felt ridiculously bewitched.
After dinner, Miss Elizabeth hurried up to her sister right away. Without her to hold their interest, Darcy and then Bingley announced their intentions to retire only half an hour after gathering with Bingley’s sisters in the drawing room.
Before parting at the top of the stairway, Darcy said, “We should leave fairly early for the Marshalls and Garretts.”
“I was about to say the same thing,” Bingley said. “What about breakfast at half past eight with the goal of riding out at around nine?”
“That sounds good to me,” Darcy said.
Darcy slept very poorly. He tossed and turned between several shockingly explicit dreams of Miss Elizabeth.
He had never had dreams like that before; he had experienced arousing dreams—but they were of vague and faceless women, not of someone he knew or even had seen.
In all his life, he had not thought of particular lovely ladies of his acquaintance beyond the single (usually painfully dull) dance or the quarter-hour of (usually even more tedious) conversation.
Having such dreams of a lady he was acquainted with felt dramatically different—and very wrong.
Despite his lack of sleep, Darcy still rose early. The sky had lightened, but the sun had not yet risen when he hurried to dress and go down to the garden to exercise his legs with a brisk walk.
He was inordinately happy to see Miss Elizabeth apparently doing the same thing.
“Mr Darcy!”
“Miss Elizabeth. I hope that your sister slept peacefully last night?”
“She did for quite a few hours, but she woke up around two and started coughing.”
“I hope you have not been awake since two?”
“I slept some more, but only in bits and pieces. I do not feel as rested as usual.”
“I regret it is so.”
“Excuse me, sir, but I believe you look to be in need of rest, as well.”
Darcy remembered the circles under his eyes. He smiled sidelong at Miss Elizabeth and said, “I dreamt quite a bit, and then tossed and turned between the dreams.”
“That is quite terrible for you.”
“Lack of sleep is worse for you, because you are nursing someone who is ill. I certainly hope you do not become ill as well. Pray, attempt to take care of yourself.”
“Thank you, but you need have no worries about me. I am almost never ill.”
Darcy remembered his friend’s advice to ask Miss Elizabeth about her life and her taste in literature and music.
He felt like almost any question he might ask would sound sudden and out of place.
Deciding to start with himself, he said, “I am reading one of the novels my sister wishes to read, so that I can approve or not approve of it. I wonder if you have read it, yet, and if you have an opinion—it is Sense and Sensibility, by a Lady.”
“Oh! That is only recently published! I have been longing to read it! How do you like it, sir?”
“I like it very well. I worry, however, about my sister reading it; she is fragile right now because a very close family friend badly betrayed her—well, really, he betrayed both of us, but he broke her heart. And there is something akin to that in this book. I am not positive my sister can withstand it.”
“Or, perhaps, it could help her. If the character who is hurt by a scoundrel in the book goes on to have a happy life afterwards, it might be healing. Of course, you know your sister, and I do not. But it is something to consider.”
Darcy stopped walking for a moment, and Miss Elizabeth took two swift strides before he started again, but his long legs enabled him to catch up instantly.
“I had not thought of it that way—thank you so much for pointing that out to me. The book might even help her talk about her feelings, because she could make it seem as if she is speaking of the character’s feelings instead of her own. ”
“Oh, yes! That seems to me to be very helpful.”
“I suppose I will finish reading before I decide.”
“Of course. May I ask how old your sister is?”
“She was fifteen when the former friend imposed on her, but she has now just turned sixteen.”
“So, just a bit older than my youngest sister. What was her personality before it happened, and has it changed?”
“She was quiet and shy before. Now she is even more silent and practically a recluse.”
“Oh dear! This sounds truly dreadful for you both. I am so sorry to hear about the trouble.”
“Thank you.” Darcy admitted, “The heartbreaking incident occurred at Ramsgate, which is why I froze last night. I wish to point out that nobody staying here at Netherfield, not even Bingley, knows of the trouble. I am certain I made everyone curious about my reaction to the name of the town—but I do not trust any of them to keep the secret, so please tell nobody.”
“I definitely will not. You can trust me…although I wonder how you know that?”
“I wonder, too,” he said, shaking his head. “Somehow…I just do.”
They said nothing else during their walk, but the silence was comfortable. Darcy checked his pocket watch twice before deciding he needed to go in. “I must eat and then ride out to the tenants again.”
“And I must check on my sister. Perhaps I will see you later today.”
“I hope so.” I hope very much.