ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝟜𝟚
????????????? ????
It's now a habit that I start waking up before my alarm sounds. Maybe it's because my body had decided somebody in this marriage needed to function properly.
I turned my head slowly. He was still asleep beside me.
Our argument from yesterday made me cringe. I just kept digging us into a bigger hole. He told me it was okay though his face didn't really seem like it was.
I hated that I'd done that to us.
My eyes drifted toward his face. The fever had painted a faint flush across his cheeks yesterday. Even now, asleep, I could still see it lingering.
I quietly slipped my hand out from beneath the blanket. Slowly, I pressed the back of my fingers against his forehead.
He was still warm- not burning, really, but it definitely not normal either.
I reached toward the nightstand, grabbing the digital thermometer before gently brushing another piece of hair away from his forehead.
"Cameron."
He didn't answer.
"Cameron." I said again.
He made a sleepy noise somewhere between a groan and a hum. "Mmm..."
"Cameron."
One eye cracked open. "Oh, hey. You look good."
"Open, please." I ignored him.
"My eyes are already open." He shifted a little.
"I mean your mouth."
"What, you're going to put a dildo in my mouth?"
I gasped. Why would he even think of something like that? Maybe it was the sleepiness getting to him. Yeah, I should blame it on the sleep.
"Oh gosh no. Just open it for me."
He sighed dramatically.
"You're awfully eager to shove something in my mouth this early. Can't I at least wake up properly first?" He yawned halfway through the sentence.
I didn't even own things like that. How was Cam able to make sentences like that not feel even the slightest bit awkward?
Despite everything, the corner of my mouth twitched.
"There." I placed the thermometer beneath his tongue before he could continue talking.
He mumbled something anyway.
The thermometer beeped, I pulled it away. 100.8.
Okay.
Yesterday had been over 102. I let out the smallest breath of relief.
"What?" He asked.
"You've gone down."
"Oh, that's good." He gave me a small smile, though it was the most genuine I've seen in weeks.
I don't know why I was expecting him to hug me, or hold my hand- just reach out to me. But then I remembered all our prior fights.
He still probably hadn't gotten over what I said.
I wanted him to forgive me. I mean- it was just a slip of the tongue. Cam knows I would never say things like that. I would never want to purposefully hurt him.
His smile disappeared almost immediately as he sat upright.
He paused before closing his eyes. "Whoa."
I frowned instantly. "What?"
"I just got a little dizzy."
I sighed.
"You don't get extra points for pretending your immune system doesn't exist." I muttered under my breath.
"Dixie, you know I hate it when you say things like that. Stop." He rubbed both hands over his face.
"Okay, I'm sorry."
We stayed in silence for a good minute or two before Camerom finally swung his legs over the edge of the bed.
"I'm making breakfast." He said.
I immediately shook my head. "No! I can make breakfast, I've cooked before."
"And why would you cook today?"
"Because you have a fever."
"It's barely a fever."
"It's still a fever." I rebutted.
He looked at me for a long second before his shoulders slumped. "Fine."
That surprised me.
I hid my smile as I got up to walk to the kitchen.
Twenty minutes later the kitchen smelled like toast, scrambled eggs, and ginger. I'd made tea too. Cameron never asked, but he'd drink coffee through pneumonia if someone let him.
Which was exactly why I wasn't letting him.
I placed the mug in front of him.
He looked inside. "You made me tea."
"Correct."
"I wanted coffee."
"Well you need to get better, so tea it is."
"I can't drink tea right now, though. I don't like the after taste, I thought I told you that before."
"Well you need to stop arguing before-" I caught myself. I sighed slowly.
"..Just drink it, please." I told him.
He glanced at me before he picked up the mug, taking one sip. He made an unpleasant face.
I folded my arms.
"...It could use honey."
I reached across the counter, grabbing the honey bear. "I already put a good amount of honey in it."
"More honey, please."
I couldn't help but smile just a little.
Little pieces of him were coming back, enough to make the kitchen feel a little less empty.
~
Just as I started cleaning the frying pan, my phone buzzed against the counter.
I imagined it was some scammer, or an unknown number, but it wasn't when I looked over.
Ted.
I hadn't seen his face in over a week.
Immediately, every muscle in my body tightened. I dried my hands before answering.
"Hello?"
"Dixie." His voice was professional, like he always was.
"Morning."
"Can you come by the office this morning?"
My heart immediately sped up. Was this what I thought it was going to be?
"Sure..yeah, um, I'll be there."
"Good."
He hung up.
That was it?
I stared at the phone, wondering what I had gotten myself into.
"Dix?"
I looked up.
Cameron was watching me. "Everything okay?"
I slowly lowered the phone. He must've seen the shocked expression on my face.
"That was Ted."
His eyebrows lifted. "What'd he say?"
"He..uh.." I swallowed. "He wants me at the office."
A small silence settled between us.
Then Cameron smiled slightly. "That's good."
"You think?"
"I do."
"You don't think I'm getting fired?" I laughed quietly.
"You can't get fired from a job you technically don't have."
I nodded slightly. "You're right."
He chuckled. "I think it's a good sign."
I wanted to believe him.
Maybe this was it. Ted had finally decided, and I was getting my office back.
"Hey." Cam had gotten me out of my thoughts.
I realized he was still looking at me. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah," I grinned. "I think I am."
"You should go."
"Are you sure?"
Today was supposed to be about me taking care of Cam. I wanted to make up for my break out yesterday.
He nodded before stretching in his seat. "I'll survive for a couple hours."
"That sentence concerns me." I narrowed my eyes.
"It shouldn't."
"It absolutely should."
He smiled, though it looked tired around the edges.
"I'll be okay for a couple of hours."
I folded my arms. "You've now lost the privilege of saying you'll be okay."
"Have I? When?" He let out a quiet laugh through his nose.
"The second you sat at the dining room table with a hundred-and-two-degree fever and tried convincing me you were just 'a little warm.'"
"I never said little." He shook his head.
He reached for his mug again, taking another sip of the tea I'd practically forced on him. Eventually I walked over, collecting his plate.
"Thanks, Dix, but you don't have to clean up for me."
"You just drink your tea." I looked over my shoulder.
We stayed quiet, the sound of the faucet filling in conversation for us.
"What if he called me there just to tell me I won't get my job?" I suddenly blurted out.
Cam glanced up at me. "You won't know unless you go, right?"
"Well I know that." I let out a slow breath.
"If it isn't what you wanted, you'll figure out the next step. You always do."
I laughed quietly. "You have way too much faith in me."
"I've watched you rebuild your life more than once. You don't quit."
I looked at him for a long moment after I set his plate aside.
It was funny how he still believed in me, even after everything. It was maybe even more than I believed in myself.
I grabbed my purse from the hook beside the front door before slipping my shoes on. "I really don't like leaving you."
"I'm not made of glass."
"No, you're made of stubbornness."
He smiled. "Oh, you mean, thing."
I walked back over to him one last time. Almost instinctively, my hand reached up to his forehead again. He caught my wrist before I could touch him.
"Oh no, you've checked my temperature enough."
"I like data."
"You just like to worry."
I opened my mouth to argue, but I knew he wasn't entirely wrong.
He studied my face for a second, then his thumb brushed gently across the inside of my wrist.
"I'll take the medicine, I'll drink the water, I won't look at another missing persons report until you get back."
I raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
"I'll try." He sighed.
He leaned in a little closer, closing the solace that separated us.
For a heartbeat, I wasn't sure what he was doing when he stopped directly in front of me. It was enough that I could smell the faint scent of peppermint from the tea.
"I really hope today goes your way."
Before I could answer, he leaned down, and his lips met mine softly. I followed, rubbing his neck slightly.
When he pulled back, he stared at me for what seemed like forever.
I smiled despite myself, breaking the unbearable eye contact. "Don't get me sick."
"That ship already sailed."
I lightly nudged his chest. "I'm serious."
"Bye, Dixie."
My heart sank a little. I noticed he never said Love you! if I was going somewhere anymore.
I mean, I had to give him some grace after everything had happened.
~
As always, Josh was standing outside Ted's office. His head lifted up when he saw me.
"Oh, hey Dixie." He gave me a simple wave followed by a slight smile.
"Josh." I greeted. "I need to speak to Ted. Is he in there?"
"Josh glanced towards his door.
"I'm pretty sure he's on a phone call right now. It'll probably be a minute." He scratched the back of his neck.
I stared at the closed office door.
He calls me in, makes it sound urgent, then decides now would be a great time to make phone calls.
How wonderful.
I guess Josh noticed my silence, and asked me a question.
"So, how was California?"
I suddenly get irritated that he was mentioning my vacation that was ruined by Ted.
"Josh, I left like two weeks ago." I rub my head.
He mutters an Oh right before looking back at me. "How've you been?"
"I've been alive."
"Good."
There's an awkward, painful silence afterwards.