Chapter 14
As soon as we separated, I was instantly swamped with embarrassment as I looked at the clothing scattered across the floor and the handprints on the glass. There was no hiding the evidence that I’d lost my mind a little where Declan Risk was concerned. And true to my typical luck, the front door to the lodge opened just as I was wiping the windows down. A couple of the kids I’d hired returned early because they were worried about getting back up the mountain if the snow kept up. If they’d arrived five minutes earlier, they would’ve gotten an eyeful, and I really would have had to think about HR violations.
Risky was unfazed by the intrusion. If I had to guess, I would say he was pretty happy with himself because the attractive snowboarder clearly put two and two together as he watched me scramble around to wipe away any traces of our lusty liaison. The flush on my face and the visible red marks that peeked out from Risky’s collar did more to keep him inside the proper boss-employee boundaries than any warning Risky had given him. To smooth over the awkwardness, I fed the kids dinner before sending them off to their living quarters above the garage. Fortunately, the kids didn’t ask any probing questions, and everyone silently agreed to pretend like nothing had happened.
Everyone except Risky.
Over the next week, the lodge experienced its first fully booked occupancy of the season. It went from a quiet house that had once been rotting away on the side of the mountain to a bustling hub of activity, filled with winter sports enthusiasts and vacationers and a full-time staff. It was the first time since I’d moved back that things felt similar to when my grandparents had been alive. It was impossible to feel lonely or unwanted when there was something or someone demanding my attention every minute. I thought the noise and chaos would be a solid buffer between me and Risky while I tried to wrap my head around how I’d happily followed him into temptation and debauchery.
I was wrong.
Any chance he managed to corner me during a free moment, his lips were on mine, and his clever hands were doing things that would lead us into trouble. He treated the targeted seduction like a game, with the goal to have me so keyed up and frustrated by the end of the day that I had no other choice than to drag him to bed and have my way with him. Or let him have his way with me.
For the first time, I looked forward to the parts of my day where I had nothing else to think about other than how special Risky made me feel. Getting the lodge open and running had consumed my thoughts for so long that it took some adjusting to recognize that I was allowed to focus on anything else. Every now and then, guilt would try to creep in when I was tangled up in Risky’s long limbs and moaning his name. However, he had a keen sense for when I started to get distracted and would deliberately touch me or move in such a way that there was no space for me to think about anything other than him and how he made me feel.
I started to understand infatuation. And it terrified me. I knew just how bitter being uncontrollably in love could be. I was scared I might step over the line between us having fun and this becoming something serious—because I couldn’t even see where it was drawn. Meaning I gave my body and free time to the handsome, dark-haired man unabashedly while keeping a tight grip on my heart. Falling head over heels for him felt like a mistake I couldn’t afford to make. One there was no coming back from.
Banner noticed something was off with me and Risky when she popped in during the weekend. She no longer showed up to help now that I had staff to take care of the day-to-day operations. She was still anxious at home and looking for any excuse to be somewhere else, so she often showed up out of the blue just to hang out.
Today, she brought more pies from her family’s restaurant since I’d never gotten to enjoy the ones lost when my truck was totaled. She spent the afternoon following me around and whining about Grant and how difficult it was to file for divorce. I didn’t mind her tagging along, but I was sick of hearing the longing and regret in her tone when she talked about her soon-to-be ex. Her lingering devotion to someone who had hurt her so badly was baffling. I got the sense that she wished she’d never shown up at his door, ripping the veil off his deception, so she could pretend that she was still in a happy marriage. I wanted to be supportive, but it was hard when I thought she and Rosie were better off without the cheating scumbag.
When she turned her attention to me and asked about the faint red marks on the back of my neck, I initially blew it off and told her they were scratches left from helping guests move heavy ski bags and backpacks. It wasn’t a total lie. I was sporting a variety of bruises from lugging luggage to rooms and cars when things got hectic. But she called me out on my subterfuge when she happened upon Risky dragging me into the walk-in pantry with a certain gleam in his eyes.
“It’s not like you, Lucky. You never get distracted by a man.” Banner was watching me with a frown on her face as I double-checked on the new chef.
It was such a relief not to be responsible for all the meals and drinks for so many guests. It was also nice to eat something other than my own cooking every day.
I pushed a plate with sliced cheese and crackers on it in front of Banner, hoping it might keep the impending quiz about my personal life at bay.
“I’m not distracted. It’s nothing serious.” I stole a cracker and broke off a corner. “This lodge has always been everything to me. Maybe I’ve finally realized I’m allowed to want more than that.”
My parents had made me think that having someone in your life to share things with made you greedy. Their relationship was a black hole. An empty void that no amount of material things or outside affection could fill. And my grandparents, as amazing as they had always been, had been tied together because of their business venture. I had a difficult time remembering if there was anything outside of the property that had brought them joy. While keeping this place alive and thriving would always be my top priority, there was room in my life for other things. Like stolen moments with a devilishly attractive man whose presence kept me on my toes.
“He’s been very helpful. Especially with all the weird things happening around here.”
“How do you know he’s not responsible for all that stuff? You’re normally so wary of strangers. It’s odd that you’ve let this guy have access to every level of this property. You’re even taking business advice from him. I don’t want you to be led astray because you have a crush for the first time in your life. I think you’re trusting Risky too much.”
“You also have access to every level of this property, Banner.” I pointed out that she was also someone I gave my very limited trust to. “If he was behind it, he wouldn’t have urged me to put the property deed into a trust. And he would’ve let me fall off the deck when the railing broke. He’s fixed a bunch of problems that aren’t his, for very little in return. I honestly don’t know what I would’ve done without him these last few months.”
I gave her a sharp look. “Do you know how rare it is for me to like someone, to feel a pull toward them? I’m not someone who fancies any pretty face or falls for sweet words. If I don’t take advantage of these feelings while they last, there might never be another opportunity. I swore I was going to stay celibate forever when I left Denver. I’m never risking getting involved with someone like Baker again. I’m fine on my own, but spending time with Risky is nice. He makes me feel things I didn’t know I could feel. I want to enjoy that while it lasts.”
Banner sniffed and narrowed her eyes. “What happens when it ends? He works for you. You’ve started to rely on him. Blue River is so small. If something happens, you know how it is. Everyone is going to start talking about you again. Don’t you remember how awful that was when we were teenagers?”
I snorted. “If they’re talking about me, they won’t be talking about you and Grant. I’ve never worried too much about what the locals think of me.”
To them, I would never live up to the impossibly high standards my grandparents had set.
Banner sighed as she picked aimlessly at a piece of cheddar. “Are all men more trouble than they’re worth?”
I reached out and pinched her cheek. “Probably. I think there are a few out there who make the trouble worth it though. They’re just hard to find.”
She batted my hand away as the chef called me over to taste the soup he was preparing to go with dinner. Once I was done tasting that, I was summoned to handle a delivery from the brewery for the outdoor bar. In the middle of that, a guest wanted to speak with me about one of the cabins having an issue with the heating. I put Risky to work, tinkering with the HVAC, while I got pulled to the parking area to help dig out a couple of cars that ended up buried in the overnight snow. I was immediately too busy to worry about any of Banner’s very legitimate concerns.
As it was, I couldn’t be objective toward issues related to Risky.
Like she’d said, I relied on him, which already made the relationship I had with him different from any other. I’d handed him the keys to my castle and asked him to help me protect it. Time would tell if I lived to regret that decision. As of now, it felt like Risky was the only thing standing between me and a certain doom. If he left suddenly—my heart dropped when I tried to finish the thought.
If keeping him in my bed meant keeping him around for just a little while longer, I was happy to offer my body in exchange. Not that sleeping with the enigmatic man was a chore. It was the opposite. It was the one indulgence I didn’t deny myself.
When I made it back to the kitchen, Banner was elbow deep in a mixing bowl, whipping up a batch of frosting. I lifted an eyebrow and asked what she was doing. She told me the chef had asked her to help pull together dessert since she was familiar with baking. She swore she’d done it for years at the family’s restaurant. I wanted to remind her that I’d never seen her step foot in the back of the house and that she’d already brought me several pies. I kept my mouth shut because she seemed happy, getting her hands dirty and being praised by the young guy I’d hired to work in the kitchen. It’d been a minute since I’d witnessed her smiling and relaxed. She looked how she used to look when we had been younger and before we started making decisions that would change our lives forever.
I left them to their own devices and went out onto the deck to make sure the outdoor area was set up for the return of all the guests who’d spent the day on the slopes. I helped make a boozy spiced cider and a kid-friendly hot cocoa. After all of that was situated, I took a moment to look out over the vista as the sun was going down and soaked in a rare moment of realizing I was living my dream and then some. I’d never thought I would make it here. Not with my parents and my terrible luck constantly working against me. Each breath of chilly mountain air reminded me that, regardless of the challenges I’d already faced and no matter what obstacles might come, this place and moments like this were worth fighting for.
The tranquility was broken by the arrival of a rowdy bunch of snowboarders ready for après-ski. The bar was in full swing in minutes. I stayed for a round of tequila shooters, then went to find Risky to see how he was doing with the heater.
Thank goodness he was a quick learner. I rarely had to redo any of his repairs or call in a professional if it was a task he’d already messed around with. He was no longer incompetent, and almost came across as a real handyman. He’d been run as ragged as I was this first week of high season. He never complained or griped about all the work that was waiting from sunup to sundown. He seemed to enjoy the madness just as much as I did, even if it was miles away from his previous occupation.
I didn’t know when he found the time to do anything else, but he swore he was getting closer to nailing down who had been behind the accident. He got the name of the person who had been driving the SUV, and a sour look would cross his face whenever I asked for an update. I got the feeling that whatever answers he was pulling out of the dark didn’t thrill him. The times when I pressed him for more information, he’d change the subject and act like everything was under control. Since he was handling things outside my wheelhouse, I had no choice but to let him work alone while I stayed tucked away in the resort.
I convinced Banner to stay for dinner since she’d helped prepare it. She told me she needed to get back to the baby and mumbled that she wasn’t very hungry, but she took the plate I handed her and sat in the kitchen with me and Risky after I mentioned he and I typically ate together like it was a recurring date. I knew she only stuck around so she could grill him and watch how we interacted together. Fortunately, he put up his charming and endearing facade and kept his ferocious side perfectly hidden. There wasn’t the slightest hint that he might be dangerous, and I saw Banner visibly softening toward him. And by the time dessert rolled around, she was acting like the two of them were long-lost friends.
Before I could dig into the cupcakes she’d helped make, I got called away by a young couple who needed a rollaway bed for their toddler. I dragged Risky with me to haul the cumbersome device out of storage. I thought Banner would be gone by the time we made it back to the kitchen, but when I returned, I found her with her head in the sink, violently throwing up.
I asked her if she was okay and almost teased her about being knocked up again when her garishly pale face and watery eyes stopped me in my tracks. I didn’t get a second to worry about her before wretched sounds started coming from the nearly full dining room. Risky stuck his head through the swinging door and gave me a telling look.
“We need to call the paramedics.” His eyebrows lifted, and his tone dropped to frigid. “And the police. This looks like someone deliberately tampered with the food.”
Panic clawed at my throat as I gazed at Banner, who looked seconds away from passing out. Her face was a scary shade of white, and she was sweating like she’d just stepped out of a sauna.
“What if they ate something that does more than just make them sick to their stomachs?”
I didn’t notice that Risky was watching Banner in an entirely different way than I was.
“Doubtful. That would be attempted murder.” He frowned as more awful sounds came from the dining area. “We need to get these people help as quickly as possible. And grab one of those cupcakes.”
I looked at the untouched sweets next to my dinner plate. It was the only thing Banner had eaten that he and I hadn’t. I quickly realized he thought the dessert was the culprit. I nodded and rushed toward Banner as she wobbled precariously at the sink. I knew I needed to get out to the dining room and address the situation, but I was concerned with how pale and shaky my friend was.
Once I was at her side, I patted her on the back as she bent over again to dry heave into the sink. “We’re calling for help. It’ll be all right, Banner.”
She weakly shoved her hair out of her face and looked at me with tear-filled eyes. “No. I don’t want to wait for the paramedics. I need to get home. I’m already later than when I told my parents I would be back. I’m going to leave now.”
I blinked in surprise. “You look terrible. I don’t think it’s safe for you to drive.”
She ran the faucet and rinsed out her mouth. “I’ll be fine. I had morning sickness throughout my entire pregnancy with Rosie. This isn’t any worse than that.” She paused and looked at me with naked concern. “Lucky”—she shook her head and reached up to put a hand on my shoulder—“you haven’t even had the lodge sold out for a week, and something like this is happening. This is bad. Once news gets out, who’s going to want to stay here?”
She was speaking my biggest fears out loud.
It had been too soon to run ahead full force after the accident and after someone tried to deliberately sabotage my reservation system, but I’d ignored the warnings and pushed to open the doors. I couldn’t live my life waiting for my luck to turn around. If I did, I would be stuck in the same place, with the same view and the same lackluster results. I had to roll the dice, hoping for a better outcome, even if it wasn’t likely. By this point, I was accustomed to living through any and all worst-case scenarios.
Banner sighed and stepped away. She still looked like death was knocking on the door, but there was endless compassion in her eyes. “I know how much the lodge means to you. I know it’s your dream to run this place the way your grandparents did, but maybe it’s too much for you to handle on your own. It might be the best choice to sell it and take the money. Starting over somewhere new, with something smaller and easier to manage, would still give you the opportunity to do what you love. This place has always been an albatross around your neck. You’re going to have nothing left if you keep fighting to hold on to it.”
I didn’t want to argue with her since she wasn’t feeling well. I needed to save my energy for the apologizing and groveling I had to do for my guests. The visions of money flying away and impending lawsuits were enough to make my blood run cold.
I was used to my luck making me miserable. I didn’t know how I could protect others from being dragged into the endless misfortune alongside me.