Chapter 14 Taylor
“I just don’t know what to do,” Taylor said. “I want to be there for him, but I always feel like I’m in the way. If I stand by him holding his hand or just to be next to him to let him know that I’m there, people start crowding in and I feel like I’m getting crushed. But I don’t want to look like I’m sulking and sit in the corner by myself.”
Alice sighed. “I know, Honey. I’ve been in your shoes and it’s not, a great place to be in.”
“It’s not like I can even make myself useful. They have more servants here than there is in our entire town, I think. There are people to cook, clean, serve drinks, follow you around with a tissue, or whatever else they think you might need.”
“That does seem to be a bit overwhelming,” Alice said. “I guess if I were you, I would just sit out of the way. It might feel like people are judging you, but they really aren’t. They’re too busy focusing on their own feelings and actions.”
“I guess so,” Taylor said. “There’s a woman, named Rachel, who has the hots for Lane. She’s told me that she and Lane were meant to be together, he’s going to dump me soon for her, and all that jazz. She is constantly here and is always going out of her way to be near him and touch him. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do about that. As his fiancé, should I shoo her off or just keep my mouth shut and let him handle it.”
“Oooh, that’s a hard one. I’m not sure,” Alice said. “You don’t want to cause a scene, you don’t want to be seen as a jealous shrew, and you don’t want to seem insensitive.”
“I know,” Taylor said frustrated. “I wish I could just sneak home, but somehow, I don’t think that would go over so well.”
“Definitely not,” Alice said. “My thought is that Lane is a big boy. If Rachel starts to get too annoying or invasive he’ll let her know. Meanwhile, stick by him when you can, plaster the appropriate looks on your face, and do the best that you can.”
“Thanks for the talk, Mom. I have to go. I think Lane’s coming into the room. I love you.”
“I love you, too,” Alice said.
“It’s getting to be a little overwhelming for you, isn’t it?” he asked, sitting on the bed next to her. He put his arm around her and pulled her close into a sideways hug.
“It’s not about me,” Taylor said. “I just remember how it felt when Carl died. None of the platitudes, however well meant, made me feel any better. In fact, they only got annoying after a while.”
“I understand what you mean,” he said. “I really just want a minute to sit and think about Grandpa and maybe to grieve. We went fishing together all the time. He taught me how to hunt with a .300 Savage rifle that had been in the family since they first came out in the 1920s.”
Taylor laid her head against him and rubbed his back. “Tell me more about him.”
“He pretended to be gruff and a hard man, but he would help out anyone if he could. I once saw him take a man shopping for groceries when the man asked for money to buy some bread and basic food. He gave one alcoholic man a job, hoping that the man would get straight. Grandpa was in Vietnam and saw a lot of terrible things. My great grandma said that he had changed a lot, which is understandable. He basically hid his emotions, so he rarely said, ‘I love you,’ but showed it all the time.”
“I wish that I could have had the chance to get to know him better.”
“Me too. He would have loved you,” Lane said. He heaved a huge sigh. “I guess I’d better get back down there. Are you coming?”
“In a minute. I want to check in on Diablo.”
Lane brushed a kiss across her lips, sighed again, and headed downstairs.
“How’s Diablo?” Taylor asked after she and Robert exchanged pleasantries.
“He doesn’t want to eat much,” Robert said, “Although he will come to me and Sam. It probably helps that we always have an apple for him.”
“Likely. He’s stubborn, not stupid,” Taylor said. “He just wouldn’t go near Anthony because he knows the man is evil. Animals can sense such things.”
“That they can. How is Lane?”
“Dealing. I think it’s hard for him to grieve because he has to help his parents host all the well-wishers.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Give him my best,” Robert said.
Sucking in a deep breath, Taylor put her phone on silent and went back downstairs. She entered the living room in time to see Rachel put her arm around Lane. He leaned down and said something to her and she hastily pulled away. When Rachel turned around, she saw Taylor watching them. She shot Taylor a look that could melt concrete.
“Can I get you something to drink or anything else?” she asked Lane, who was leaning against the fireplace mantel.
“A bottle of water would be great,” Lane said.
Taylor didn’t notice the man walking into the kitchen behind her.
“Taylor Williams? What on Earth are you doing here?” a deep voice said.
She jumped, startled.
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said.
“Jerome. Hello,” Taylor said.
He had been one of Carl’s poker, fishing, and hunting buddies.
“I thought that the Williams and Johnsons were mortal enemies,” Jerome said, picking up one of the sandwiches that had been laid out for guests.
“Love shows up in the strangest places, I guess,” Taylor explained. “I met Lane and I discovered that he wasn’t the big bad boogey man and fell in love.”
“I suppose so. Carl would want you to be happy,” Jerome said. “He thought the sun rose and set with you.”
“He was an amazing man and I’ll always love him, too,” Taylor said. “But there is love in my heart for a companion.”
“I wish you well,” Jerome said.
Taylor watched him leave, thinking that she didn’t lie to him. She had met Lane and discovered that he was wonderful, and she did love him.
That night, after everyone finally left, Lane and Taylor went back to their room. He grabbed a pillow and blanket for the chair. She looked at the king-sized bed and at the chair.
“Why don’t you sleep on the bed, too. There’s enough room for both of us. You just keep your hands and everything else to yourself.”
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“Am I sure that you can share the bed or that you need to keep your body parts to yourself?” Taylor grinned.
“Yes.”
“Then, yes to both.”
“Thank goodness. That chair isn’t nearly as comfortable as I told you it was,” Lane said.
They went to sleep on their own sides of the bed, but somehow, in the middle of the night, they gravitated toward each other. When Taylor woke up, she was pressed up against Lane. His arm was wrapped around her, holding her close to him. Her head was tucked perfectly underneath his chin. For a minute, she laid still and enjoyed the sensation. For the first time since Carl died, she didn’t feel alone. It was as though Lane was touching her soul as much as he was touching her body. Time stood still and Taylor felt completely at peace.
Lane slowly woke up. He continued to hold her for a moment.
“That just feels so right,” he said.
“It does,” Taylor agreed.
“I suppose we should get our day started,” he said.
After breakfast, Willow tapped Taylor on the arm. “I didn’t bring enough clothes for a longer stay and I will need something appropriate for his funeral. While Grandpa would think it’s great, others might be shocked if we wore our ball gowns to the church and cemetery.”
“It might be a little scandalous, although somehow, I don’t think you’d care. I can see the headline now, ‘Wealthy socialite wears ballgown to grandfather’s funeral.”
“Probably not, but I don’t want to be responsible for giving Mom a heart attack,” Willow said. “Don’t worry about paying for anything. I already told you that I have enough money for two lifetimes.”
“It doesn’t feel right,” Taylor said.
“You’re family.” Willow lowered her voice and said, “Even if the engagement isn’t real, I love you like a sister.”
While they were shopping, Willow talked about her grandfather. “He was an amazing man. He once sat down and binge-watched old episodes of I Carly, and Sabrina, The Teenage Witch with me.”
“That sounds awesome.”
“It was. He had a very kind heart even though he tried hard to pretend he didn’t. One of his favorite charities was animal shelters. He did everything he possibly could to make sure that the shelters had everything they needed and even hosted adoption events. We are asking people to donate to the shelters instead of flowers.”
“I only got to talk to him a couple of times, but he seemed sweet. I wish I could have gotten to know him more.”
“Me, too.”
To be honest, I like all of his family members, even if his mom can be overwhelming sometimes. I wish the engagement were real.
Taylor shook her head to get rid of the thought.
Don’t even go there. It will just end up with you having a broken heart.