PEANUT
Alyse had been calling, and I was intending to text her, but the shit with my brother had my head fucked up.
The way Xavier and I left him, I felt bad.
I knew tough love was what he needed, but I didn’t want him to think I wasn’t there for him, because I was.
I always have been, but a nigga was tired.
Tired of worrying, tired of going into his room late at night, checking his pulse.
Tired of picking his drunk ass up off the floor in random places.
Tired of the fights and races he got us into, I just wanted some normalcy, and with Alyse, that’s when I got it.
Zaria came around to where I sat in the living room with one of the twins on her hip, “It’s going to be ok. It may seem hard, but I promise you he knows you guys care, and when it sinks in, he will do the right thing.”
Chevy came down the steps holding the other twin. “Where is your pops? You know where he is?”
“D-d-d-downtown. I-sss-ss-saw- him n-na-n-na-not t-tt-tt-too long a-a-ago.”
I could see his wheels turning. Chevy was the type of nigga that’ll dig up your past and make you face it even if you didn’t want to. “Wa-wa-we da-da-da-don’t f-f-fu-fuck with,” I paused. I could hear Alyse in my head. Slow down. “We d-d-don’t fu-fuck with him.”
Chevy nodded. Zaria glanced at him. “June, don’t go stirring up the past. They’re going through enough. Peanut, you’re welcome to stay as long as you—”
“Z, nah, this is our space. Peanut, I will get you a hotel,” Chevy jumped in.
Zaria rolled her eyes. “What did I say? June, can you grab Savior for a second?”
He started to grumble as he walked over to grab Savior from her arms, but glanced at me. What did I say? He mouthed.
I laughed. Chevy was mean as fuck, but as long as Zaria was around, he was a bit calmer. My phone rang with a call from Alyse. This time, I picked up. “Hell-ha-hello?”
Her sniffles made me alert. “Can you meet me on the hill?”
“Yu-yu-yes.”
I got up to leave. I didn’t even bother to say bye because the way Alyse sounded scared me.
It took me no time to get to her. When I did, she was sitting inside the car.
I hit my kickstand, rushed over to the passenger side, and tapped the window.
She unlocked the door, and I got in. Alyse’s eyes were red and puffy.
I had the worst day ever.
What’s wrong?
Her eyes lowered. My father wants me to go to a school out of state. Flex, remember her?
I nodded.
I found out she died. She’s gone. Not only did I lose a mentor, but a friend as well.
Seeing Alyse cry made me feel something I had never felt: helplessness from not being able to control the situation with her parents, and the loss of a friend.
I lifted her chin. I’m sorry about your friend, and I’m sure she wouldn’t want you crying over her. With your parents. You need to use your voice, Alyse. They need to hear how you truly feel.
I could see her anger rise. I can’t! I’m scared.
I shook my head. Alyse, baby, listen to me.
You and I being together, I need you to speak up.
You’re the voice for both of us. If I could, I would.
I would tell your father to kiss my ass, but I can’t.
How would you ever know what life is like if you let him control everything? What about your audition?
She started sobbing. I stroked her hair then raised her chin again. Stop crying. Stop. You’re strong baby. What do you want? Huh? What makes Alyse happy?
Dancing! Feeling free and being with you.
Then do it. You got me already; that has never been a question. I winked.
She giggled. What about my audition? I have no one to help me.
You don’t need anyone because you’ve got it. I believe in you.
Her eyes squinted. “What do you want?” she asked me, now talking.
Honestly?
“Yes.”
I want to go to school. I want to teach little ones like me, one with speech problems. Show them how to be confident and that they can have some normalcy, especially little Black boys.
“You should. I believe in you.”
I laughed. Nah, it’s just a dream.
She threw her hands up, “Why not make it a reality?”
I never thought about pushing myself enough to get into school.
Since declining the offer, my focus had been on making sure Mison was straight, but knowing she believed in me felt different.
Somehow her saying that made me feel like I could really do this shit.
I lay my head on the headrest and my mind thought of all the possibilities.
The back of her hand ran down the side of my face. “Jalen,” she called out.
My head rolled to look at her. “Let’s do it again.”
“Da-d-d-do wh-what?”
“Have sex.”
I laughed because it sounded white as hell. “Ra-r-r-r ride it da-da-then.”
She smiled. “You said it’s like dancing, right?”
I nodded.
I pushed the seat all the way back before I pulled my dick out of my sweats and let it stand at attention for her. I glanced down at my dick, then raised my brows to her. She climbed over the seat onto my lap. She lifted her dress, then raised her hips.
Slow. All you’re doing is dancing, baby. I signed.
She eased down slowly, and I closed my eyes. “Mmm,” I moaned.
At first, she was stiff, then she loosened up.
My god! I signed, my head shaking side to side.
Foreheads touching. This time, when she kissed me, it was a bit nastier than before.
I gripped the small of her back using my hand as a guide.
Alyse’s body roll was crazy. Her pussy was super tight and wet.
I knew that I wasn’t letting another nigga have her.
Shit, since the day I met her, I knew she would be mine, but now that shit was official.
Monfua put us on game about the Zoo Baby shit, and Alyse was definitely getting that paddle work. I hope she was ready because this shit we were doing was light work.