Chapter 8 #2
The shower started, and he lay back against her pillows, trying to figure out when his life had gotten so complicated.
Three weeks ago, his biggest concern had been healing his ankle fast enough to get back on the circuit.
Now he was lying in bed trying to decide whether love was worth giving up everything he'd thought he wanted.
Except that was a lie. He'd already decided. Love was worth everything. She was worth everything.
Love. The word didn't scare him the way it should have. Somewhere between her awkward questions about his horse and the way she'd kissed him in that barn, he'd fallen completely and irrevocably in love with Vanessa Baldwin.
The woman who needed stability more than anything else in the world.
The woman who deserved better than a broken-down cowboy with no permanent address and a profession that might cripple him before he turned thirty-five.
Except maybe he could be better. Maybe he could be the man she needed. Maybe love was enough to make him want to try.
His phone buzzed again. Another message from Jake: Seriously, man. Bill says your ankle's good enough. Don't let whatever's got you spooked keep you from getting back out there. This is who you are.
This is who you are. Jake was wrong. This wasn't who he was anymore.
The man who'd moved into this house three weeks ago would have been packed and gone by now, chasing the next rodeo and the next eight-second ride.
But the man lying in Vanessa's bed, breathing in her scent and listening to her shower, wanted a different life.
He wanted to be the kind of man who could give her what she needed. The kind who could promise her tomorrow and next month and next year without flinching. The kind who could love her without leaving.
And maybe, just maybe, he could be that man.
When she emerged from the bathroom twenty minutes later, dressed in another conservative business suit with her hair pulled back, the distance between them felt like miles instead of feet.
But he could cross that distance. He would cross it.
"Coffee's ready," he said, pulling on his jeans. "And I meant what I said about driving you."
"That's not necessary."
"Maybe not necessary, but I want to."
She looked at him for a long moment, and he could see the war playing out behind her green eyes. The part of her that wanted to let him in, and the part that was terrified of depending on someone who might not stay.
He'd just have to prove to her that he was staying. That he wasn't going anywhere without her.
"Okay," she said finally. "But I'm buying lunch afterward."
"Deal."
The drive to her first interview took thirty minutes through morning traffic. She was quiet, flipping through notes on her phone, and he wondered if she was nervous about the interview or about what had happened between them last night.
Probably both.
"Tell me about the consulting firm," he said, partly to break the silence and partly because he genuinely wanted to know.
"They're a startup. Three partners who used to work for bigger firms and went out on their own.
They specialize in helping mid-size retailers optimize their supply chains and inventory management.
" She put her phone down and looked out the window.
"It's interesting work. More strategic than what I was doing at Hartwell's. "
"Sounds like it plays to your strengths."
"Maybe. If they can afford me." She glanced at him. "Startups don't always have the budget for experienced hires."
"Then they'll figure it out if they want you badly enough."
She smiled at that, some of the tension leaving her shoulders. "You have a lot of faith in me."
"I have the right amount of faith in you. You're the one underselling yourself."
When he pulled up in front of the office building, she turned to him with an expression he was starting to recognize. Gratitude mixed with vulnerability, like she wasn't used to people being in her corner.
"Wish me luck?"
"You don't need luck," he said, catching her hand before she could get out. "You need them more than they need you, and they'd be idiots not to realize it."
Her smile became real then, soft and grateful and tinged with hope.
"Thank you," she said, and leaned across the seat to kiss him goodbye.
It was supposed to be a quick peck, but it deepened into more when she groaned into his mouth, and by the time they broke apart, they were both breathing hard.
"Go," he said before he could change his mind and drag her back home to bed. "Knock 'em dead."
He watched her walk into the building, admiring the confident line of her shoulders and the way she moved like she owned the world even when her personal life was falling apart. She was stronger than she gave herself credit for, braver than she knew.
Strong enough to handle whatever choice he was about to make.
Brave enough to love a cowboy, if he could prove he was worth the risk.
His phone rang as he pulled away from the curb, and Jake's number flashed on the screen. This time, he answered.
"Fleming."
"Finally. Thought you were avoiding me."
"Just busy."
"Too busy for the Oklahoma rodeo? Because entries close tomorrow night, and I need to know if I'm traveling solo or if you're coming back."
Tomorrow night. The deadline Bill had mentioned last week when they'd talked about his recovery. He'd been planning to decide closer to the date, see how his ankle felt, gauge whether he was ready to compete again.
He hadn't been planning on falling in love.
"I'll let you know," he said, because he wasn't ready to explain to Jake that he'd fallen in love, and everything had changed.
"Don't wait too long. I need to know if I'm splitting gas and hotel costs or doing this run alone."
After Jake hung up, Dustin sat in her driveway staring at the house they'd shared for three weeks, the house where he'd learned what it felt like to wake up next to someone who mattered more than prize money and eight-second rides.
Tomorrow night. Less than a day to decide between the life he'd always known and the possibility of building a new one.
Except there was no decision to make. He'd already chosen. He'd chosen her the moment she'd opened her front door. He'd just been too scared to admit it.
Now he had to figure out how to tell her that love was worth the leap.
That she was worth everything.