Chapter 5
5
M y stomach twists and turns, and I feel like I'm going to be sick. It takes everything in me to keep my knees from buckling and collapsing to the ground, crying and vomiting.
This is what I get for spending time with someone I don't know.
I can't believe I slept with this man. I let him kiss me, touch me; I let this man inside me. He's a monster.
I can't hold it back anymore, and I fall to the ground before my shaky legs can carry me away. I brace the wall beside me, trying to focus on how cold the bricks feel on my hand as bile rises in my throat.
Alexei rushes to my side, but I push him away, not wanting him anywhere near me. I squeeze my eyes shut and try to make sense of the situation.
I was sitting at the table, and he didn't come back for a few minutes. The food arrived, it smelled incredible, and I wanted to share it with him. Both of us ordered French toast, though I got mine with a homemade marmalade that I tasted with the perfect harmony between sweet and sour. I waited a couple of minutes for him to return, but he didn't.
That's when I decided to look for him. We were on a date, and he went to talk to someone outside. I thought it was weird, but I didn't think he expected that man to be there. After everything that happened last night, I was happy to spend the morning with him. It made me feel like I made the right decision to lose my virginity to Alexei.
I didn't see him out front, so I walked around a little bit, hoping to find him. His car was still parked where he left it. That's when I saw the alleyway by the diner. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined I would stumble upon Alexei jumping an unarmed man in broad daylight.
The man tried to fight back, but it was no use. Alexei swung at him ruthlessly, hardly giving him a moment of reprieve between blows. I was frozen in place. I couldn't move, and I could hardly breathe.
Then those eyes locked on my own, and I saw a stranger standing before me. I already knew that Alexei was mysterious. I told him so much about myself last night, and he listened without giving me much information about himself. In hindsight, maybe that should have been a red flag.
I'd come to find warmth and comfort in his dark blue eyes. But seeing him covered in another man's blood, looking at me with that animal instinct still filling his hard, dark eyes made me sick.
“Don't touch me!” I say to him as I try to back away now. He still has blood on his hands, and I don't want that anywhere near me. I don't want him anywhere near me. “What did you do?”
He opens his mouth but doesn't say anything. Or maybe he does, and I just can't hear it through the blood rushing through my brain. I need to leave. I need to run as far away from this man as I possibly can. He's dangerous. He's an animal.
I turn around and try to leave, but he grabs me by the shoulder and stops me. I whip my head around and glare at him, trying to tug my arm away, but he's too strong.
“Amelia, I can explain,” he says, trying to calm me down enough to get a word in. When I continuously try to escape him, he grips me tighter. “I can't let you leave! Not after what you just saw.”
A stone forms in my chest, and it sinks into my stomach. His words are clear. I shouldn't have seen what I did, and he'll make sure I don't tell anyone. If that means he's going to kill me, I don't know. But I know I've made a grave mistake trusting him.
“I won't tell anyone, I swear,” I beg, tears streaming down my face from the terror.
You slept with a monster.
“I'm not going to hurt you,” Alexei says, trying to calm me down.
You slept with a monster.
“Please, just let me go.” No matter how hard I beg, he just holds me tighter.
He says something that I tune out while I try to think of a way to escape. Behind him, I see the man on the ground slowly getting to his knees. He's quiet, and his eyes lock on mine, but neither of us says anything. He could be my only hope out of this.
He staggers as he stands up but slowly makes his way toward Alexei, reaching for something in his pocket. After a moment, I realize it's a switchblade, long and sharp and ready to attack Alexei.
A part of me wants him to stab Alexei and put an end to this so I can leave. But I can't watch him die. Not after everything I've already seen.
“Alexei, behind you,” I say before the other man lunges.
Everything happens in a blur. I think the man is going to attack Alexei as revenge for jumping him in the alley, but his eyes are glued to me. He lunges at me, the blade firm in his hands. He's trying to attack me . Not the man who nearly killed him in the alley.
Alexei steps in and knocks him to the ground before he can get too close to me. I watch with wide eyes as the man falls to the ground again, the knife dropping from his grasp. Alexei grabs it off the concrete and sinks it into his flesh as if he were cutting into a stick of butter. He pulls the knife out and sinks it in once again.
My legs completely give out, and I fall to the ground, almost comforted to have it so firmly below me as I watch Alexei pull the knife once again, folding it and putting it in his pocket while blood pools around the man.
Everything around me is both still and racing at once. Alexei looks down at the man, checking his pulse, then shaking his head before punching the brick wall with the side of his fist. The pain I imagine must be radiating through his arms doesn't seem to faze him, but then again, I'm sure he's used to hitting things.
He makes a call before kneeling on the ground beside me, saying something I don't hear. I stare blankly at him, trying to piece together everything I've just seen.
What feels like seconds later, but must be much more than that, several other men arrive and carry the body into the restaurant. They start scrubbing the blood off the concrete, leaving no trace of the man behind. Many of them look at me with curious expressions, wondering if I will be a problem too.
Alexei stands in front of me, making sure they don't pay me any attention.
When the body is gone and every drop of blood is cleaned up, some men shine UV lights in the alley, making sure they got everything. They've clearly done this before.
While they do that, Alexei grabs my arm and picks me up. I look down at it and see blood from his hands staining the sleeve of my favorite T-shirt, only reminding me of everything I just witnessed here today.
He walks me to his car, and we get inside. I can't say anything while he buckles the seat belt for me. We drive off, but I don't know where we're going, and I don't think to ask. A part of me wants to look out the window and note any landmarks we pass, but nothing sticks to my brain.
I just watched a man die. He was alive, and now, he isn't. I saw every moment of it.
We park the car in front of a townhouse apartment with a small, tidy lawn. I assume it's Alexei's house. I would give everything to be back in my small apartment, huddled under the blankets in my bedroom, dreaming about this. I wish I could wake up and realize this was nothing more than a nightmare.
But Alexei opens my car door, a gesture that is much less appreciated now, and pulls me out of the car to lead me inside.
I just watched the man I slept with, the man I lost my virginity to, kill a man, and now, he's bringing me to his house. I don't know what he has in store for me, but it can't be good.