Chapter 7
PHOEBE
“I’m not sure about this,” I laugh nervously.
Mery, my Hula dance instructor, gives me a soft smile while the other resort clients—all of them women—giggle and keep practicing their steps with Sage, the other Hula teacher.
Just outside of the dance studio, I can see Dominic sitting at one of the gentlemen’s tables, where the husbands and fathers of my fellow dance students wait over drinks and snacks. He could’ve gone scuba diving with Theo and August while I tried this Hula thing, but he chose to stick around.
“Don’t be nervous,” Mery says. “Hula is more about expression than it is about getting the steps perfect the first time you try. We’re all beginners here.”
“You’re the instructor,” I reply with a weak smile.
“And not the one you should be comparing yourself to,” she says with a laugh.
She’s a gentle soul and incredibly patient, given how anxious and clumsy I’ve been over the past twenty minutes since we started the class.
“Okay, can we try again?” I ask Mery.
“Of course. Remember, you’re not just dancing, you’re telling a story,” she says, gently taking me through the first steps of the routine again.
“A story,” I mumble as I follow along. “It’s easier than ballroom dancing, that’s for sure.”
“You took ballroom dancing?”
“Just for a few months. My mom said I was too big and not graceful enough so she switched me to swimming.”
Mery gives me a pained look before whipping up another smile as she takes me through the routine, showing me how to move my arms. “It’s like you’re following the descent of the sun, see?” she says as she performs the moves.
All I can do is gaze at her with sincere admiration.
She’s so light on her feet. So graceful.
Yet she’s got love handles like I do and thick upper arms. Full breasts and thick thighs.
I was taught to be ashamed of my curves, while Mery grew to worship hers through dance.
It breaks my heart and heals me at the same time.
“Okay, I think I got it,” I tell her.
“You’ve got it for sure,” she encourages me. “Look at you! You just did the entire first third of the routine without missing a beat!”
“I did?”
“Yes, Phoebe, you did. Once you understand the story behind the dance, it’s easier to follow along because you identify the words with the movements.”
“Like the sun coming down over Mauna Kea.”
“Exactly. And the sea breeze rising to meet the moon.”
The more I practice, the better I seem to get. Or more confident, anyway. We take a break at the forty-five-minute mark, and I go outside for a sip of water and a quick chat with Dominic. He smiles as soon as he sees me, measuring me from head to toe with a twinkle in his dark eyes.
“What?” I ask after gulping down half a bottle of water. “Something wrong?”
“There’s absolutely nothing wrong, Phoebe. I was simply admiring you.”
I glance down at myself, fully aware that my waist is bare. I opted for the grass skirt and a white bikini top for the dance class, though I didn’t feel as pretty or as confident as the other resort clients until I got to spend a few moments around Mery and Sage.
“Well, I’ll admit, I do like the whole breeze through my grass skirt part,” I laugh lightly. “Especially in this heat.”
“You look beautiful,” Dominic replies. “Naked or otherwise.”
“Stop. You’re going to make me blush.”
“Blush suits you rather well,” he shoots back with a wink. “How’s the dance class going?”
I glance back at the hut, where Mery is working with another client. “Better than I expected. We got off to a rocky start, but I think I’m getting the hang of it. I finally nailed the routine, which, apparently, is pretty good for a first-time student.”
“Attagirl,” he chuckles softly.
I sit beside him, both of us watching the class while the sun casts its afternoon glow across the circular garden and its many white awnings, which extend from the elegant wood structure that surrounds the garden’s edge.
“Pretty sure I heard this song in a Disney movie,” Dominic says.
“You did. That’s the Hula dance we’re learning,” I reply. “Everybody wants to do Lilo’s dance, though I definitely felt more like a Stitch earlier.”
He smiles. “You move very well.”
I give him a surprised look. “Oh. You were watching?”
“Of course,” he says, his eyes searching my face. “I didn’t come here to stare at the grass, Phoebe. I came here to support you, to watch you enjoy yourself. It looks like you’re making the most of it.”
“That’s really sweet,” I reply, downright surprised.
He leans closer, grinning. “Did you think it would be nothing but mindless sex between us?”
“Kind of. Yeah.”
“You’re worth so much more than that.”
I know that. I thought I was more to Matthew, but clearly, that wasn’t the case. So how is it so easily the case with these three amazing men? My own mind is sabotaging me. It’s making me think less of myself while I grow determined to push forward and blossom.
“Thank you, Dominic. It’s nice to hear that,” I confess.
Mery steps out and claps her hands. “Alright, students. Break is over. It’s time to return and prepare for the performance.”
“Prepare for the what?” I croak, suddenly alarmed as I bolt up from my chair.
“You’re going to perform the dance you just learned for your companions.” Mery laughs lightly while I feel a wave of dread wash over me, stiffening my joints. “Gentlemen, come closer to the hut so you can get a better view.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice,” Dominic says and stands up.
“Oh, no,” I gasp, giving him a terrified look. “No, no, no…”
“No? You’re joking. I just watched you do the whole routine on your own. You’ve got this.”
I shake my head, growing increasingly anxious at the thought of performing for him or anyone else, for that matter. “Dominic, no. I didn’t know you were watching. It’s different now. I can’t do it. Let’s just go.”
“Phoebe.” He catches my wrist before I can flee, pulling me close with a soft but assertive strength. “You made it this far. What are you afraid of?”
That’s a good question. What am I afraid of? And the self-sabotaging answers start pouring in.
“Where do I begin? Oh, right. Messing up the steps. Tripping and falling on my face. Making a fool of myself. All while ultimately embarrassing you in the process.”
Dominic kisses me, putting an abrupt end to my verbal deluge.
My mind goes blank, and I melt against him, his taste tingling my senses as warmth spreads through my chest. It feels so good.
A voice in the back of my head is telling me that this doesn’t have to end.
I’m sure it will eventually, but until then, I should enjoy it.
I moan softly against his lips and he pulls back, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. Such a simple gesture, yet it’s enough to start my engines rumbling.
“You’ve got this, Phoebe. I know you do. I’ll be right here, watching and supporting you. Two left feet and all,” he adds with a wink.
“That’s what I’m afraid of. For you to see me fail,” I confess, lowering my gaze.
“It’s a dance class, darling, not a contest. We’re just having fun.”
Emboldened by his words and eager to see this through, I remind myself that I hold a Master of Science in Financial Economics from Columbia University; a stumble in a Hula dance will not be my downfall.
With a little bit of courage, I join the other students in the hut while the guests gather around to watch us. To my relief, Mery and Sage position themselves in front of us, and Mery gives me a smile over her bare shoulder.
“Just follow along if you forget any of the steps, ladies,” she says, though she keeps looking at me. “We’ll be right here with you.”
Dominic’s gaze softens as the music starts and we begin our dance. To my surprise, the steps come naturally to me, the movements flowing through my arms and legs as I follow the story of the song.
We become one, in smooth unison as we follow Mery and Sage’s cues. My heart grows and throbs with happiness as I realize I don’t even need to keep track of Mery as I dance. I’m nailing every step and gesture with newfound confidence.
When the song is over, I breathe a sigh of relief, giddy as we bow and the people clap for our performance. My heart warms as I look at Dominic, a huge smile dancing on his lips, pride shining in his deep, brown eyes.
This man is proud of me.
On our way back to the suite, Dominic and I talk about the dance class and everything I learned from Mery and Sage about Hula’s history and her ancestors.
The sun casts vibrant shades of red and orange over the island as it begins to set, white clouds stretching like tufts of cotton across the sky.
To the east, a lazy half-moon rises, joined by a shy twinkle from Venus.
“There’s a lot they didn’t cover in history class in school, I’ll tell you that much,” I say. “There’s so much we never learned about this island, about its people. How is that even possible? All we ever hear about Hawaii is that it’s a great honeymoon destination. Hell, it’s why I picked it.”
“My brother and I agree that our education system is in dire need of reform,” Dominic says with a heavy sigh.
“The curriculum is severely outdated, among other things. I’m grateful our parents had the means and resources to send us abroad when we were kids, giving us a chance to see the world for ourselves. ”
“Me, too. Yet there are millions of kids out there who don’t have the same opportunities,” I say. “There are so many people who never get to visit Hawaii, let alone Europe or Asia.”
“You’re never going to fix the world’s problems, Phoebe. There’s no point in worrying about them."
"That sounds a tad cynical."
"It’s realistic,” he says. “Life is hard enough as it is. Sure, our lives may appear easy to some, but nobody walks in our shoes except us. Therefore, why worry about problems you can’t solve when you have so much on your plate already?”
He’s got a point, and it’s a fair one, to be honest.
“I guess it’s easier to be a bleeding heart for the sake of appearances,” I mutter.
“A habit of the upper echelon, unfortunately,” he chuckles. He puts his arm around my shoulders, keeping me close as we walk up the stony alleyway leading to the resort’s private beach. “Cry glittery tears about the rest of the world to seem like we’re better than we actually are.”
“Again, I’d say that’s a cynical point of view,” I reply with a cool grin.
“It would be if I didn’t attend one of your sister’s many Save the Whales charity galas,” he says.
“All fluff and champagne where socialites and other elites don their best suits and fancy gowns while they write a check and pretend they’re doing some good in the world.
In the meantime, their businesses are the same ones decimating the whale population across the globe. ”
“Ouch.”
Again, he’s right. I’ve said the same thing, more than once.
It’s one of the reasons I stopped attending Crystal’s charity events.
That and the fact that she’s told me on several occasions that I should lose a few pounds before coming to the next one.
She didn’t like how I looked in the event’s official photos.
“What’s on your mind?” Dominic asks, noticing the heavy silence that has fallen between us. I give him a soft smile.
“Just looking back and realizing how much crap I tolerated because I wanted to be in the room. It’s ridiculous.”
My phone pings. It’s been quiet all day—for once. Dominic stops with me as I take the phone out of my purse.
“Maybe it’s important,” I mutter, unlocking the screen. “Oh, no.”
“What is it?”
My blood runs cold as Matthew’s name pops up. I can feel my lips twisting with what I can only describe as sheer disgust.
“It’s Matthew,” I reply, my voice trembling slightly. I feel a shadow come over Dominic’s face before even looking up and seeing it. “He apologized for how he acted. He wants to meet and talk.”
Dominic thinks about it for a moment, his eyes carefully analyzing my expression while I do the same to him. He puts on a smile and snatches the phone from my hand with a laugh.
“Forget about him,” he says, slipping my phone in his pants pocket. “We’ve got plans tonight.”
“We do?” I giggle as he slips his arm around my waist and guides me up the steps leading to the beach. “What kind of plans?”
“Dinner, champagne, and as much time in the bedroom as you desire.”
“Just the bedroom?”
“We could always try out the Jacuzzi, but the neighbors might see us.”
Why does that naughty thought entice me? It doesn’t matter. What matters is that all it took was the promise of a wonderful night with Dominic, August, and Theo to completely obliterate Matthew’s unexpected presence from my mind.
Here, he no longer exists. And for the first time since he broke off our engagement, I feel truly and genuinely happy. Free as a bird, ready and eager to soar and reclaim my spot at the center of my own universe.
Where I belong.