Chapter 12
twelve
. . .
Gracie
I couldn’t move.
Couldn’t breathe.
Couldn’t speak.
My body was in a state of euphoria.
It wasn’t like I didn’t know how to pleasure myself, but this was—next level.
This was completely different.
The feel of his mouth on me.
His lips on me.
His tongue.
I sighed as I pushed up on my elbows and studied Cutler, who was still down on his knees, watching me with concern. Like he thought I might regret what we’d just done. He couldn’t be more wrong. “That was amazing. I’ve definitely been missing out. Thank you.”
A loud laugh escaped him. “Sure. Happy to service you. You’ve got one impressive pussy. Shame on any man who didn’t take the opportunity to experience it.”
My mouth gaped open, and he took his hand and pressed it closed. “Careful, Jeege. I’m hard as steel right now, so if you keep dropping your mouth open, I’m going to offer to put something in it.”
My head fell back with laughter as he adjusted my bikini bottoms and moved to sit beside me on the bench.
I slid down onto my knees. “I have the perfect solution.”
“I was kidding.” He reached for me, attempting to pull me back up beside him. “Let’s sit with this for a minute.”
“Nope. I know what you’re doing, and it’s not going to work.”
“What am I doing?” he asked as his lips turned up into the sexiest smile.
“You like to do things for me, but I also like to do things for you. This is a one-time deal, and we each get to make the other one feel good. That was the agreement.”
But it was so much more than that.
I’d never felt so alive, so desired.
My thighs were slick, and my nipples ached. I was desperate to make him feel the same way he’d made me feel.
“Gracie,” he said, tucking the hair behind my ear, “I don’t think you understand how much you already did for me when you came on my lips.”
I could feel my cheeks heat. “I want that for you too.”
“You sure about that? Because once you put your mouth on me, I won’t have this kind of restraint.”
I licked my lips with anticipation. “That’s what I want.”
I wanted to see him come undone.
I wanted to make him feel as good as he’d made me feel.
I reached for the tie on his swim trunks and undid it.
“Lift,” I commanded, and he chuckled as he pushed up enough for me to tug down his trunks.
And holy eggplant emoji. Cutler Heart wasn’t just larger than life in personality and stature.
He had the largest penis I’d ever seen.
Obviously I hadn’t seen all that many—however, I’d read a lot of romance books, watched plenty of sexy movies, and seen my fair share of porn.
And this was—something else.
I shouldn’t have been surprised, because everything about him was spectacular.
“He obviously likes you,” he said, his voice gruff and laced with desire. “Especially when you’re staring at him like that.”
“Of course you have the most attractive penis.” I threw my hands in the air. “I mean look at it.”
“I don’t need to look. We’re very well acquainted.” He chuckled, but I could hear the strain behind it.
He was turned on. Very turned on.
I felt empowered that I was having this impact on him.
I would have thought this would feel awkward or uncomfortable, because Cutler was my best friend—but it was the opposite.
It felt natural and easy, and I was beyond aroused as I took him in.
“I’ve done this a couple of times, but I’m no expert, so just tell me what you like.”
He nodded, a sexy grin spreading across his handsome face.
I wrapped my hand around the base of his shaft and stroked him a few times, and he leaned back against the bench. “Just like that.”
I moved forward, pushing his legs apart so that I could settle between them. I glanced up to see the heat in his eyes as he watched me.
It fueled me.
I used the tip of my tongue and swirled it around his tip, and his hips jolted in response.
He liked it.
“Yes,” he said, voice gruff.
I leaned forward and wrapped my lips around him, taking him as deep as I could. I bobbed my head up and down as my tongue moved along his long, thick erection.
“Fuck, Jeege. That’s so fucking good,” he groaned, and I had to squeeze my legs together in response.
I had not expected to be turned on while giving him a blow job.
But here we were.
His fingers tangled in my hair as I continued to slide up and down his shaft.
“Now I want you to slide your hand between your legs. I want you to come with me.” His voice was deep and commanding.
I did what he asked.
This was what I was here for.
My hand moved between my thighs, and he gripped my hair harder. His breaths were even more labored now, and I moved faster.
He was panting and bucking into my mouth, and an overwhelming feeling was building between my legs.
I looked up through my lashes and found his intense gaze fixed on me, jaw tight and nostrils flared.
It was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.
And he just stared down at me before tugging on my hair in warning. “I’m going to come.”
It was a warning, and one I didn’t want to heed.
I stayed right there as a guttural sound escaped his lips.
“Fuuuuccckkk,” he groaned as he unloaded in my mouth just as I went right over the edge with him. “Holy fuck.”
Lights exploded behind my eyes as my body shook and trembled. I swallowed every ounce he gave me, and I stayed right there, just as he’d done for me.
He stopped thrusting his hips and I pulled my hand from between my legs, stunned that I’d just orgasmed for a second time in the last thirty minutes.
My mouth made a little popping sound when I lifted my head, looking up at him as I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. He tucked himself back into his swim trunks.
He reached for me, pulling me onto his lap and wrapping his arms around me.
“That was fucking amazing, Jeege,” he said, his voice low and gravelly.
“Really? It was good?” I asked, turning to look at him.
His gaze locked with mine, and for a split second he just stared at me, almost like he was seeing me for the first time. The look in his eyes was intense, and he didn’t say a word for a beat. My breath hitched in my throat, but I wasn’t certain what it meant.
But I knew he’d been affected as deeply as I had.
And then I saw the shift, as if he’d been somewhere else for a moment and had just pulled himself back together.
“Best blow job I’ve ever had,” he said, and his lips turned up in the corners. “You have nothing to worry about, and if practicing on me is what you need, feel free to help yourself as often as you want. I mean, you did say I had a very attractive dick.”
His humor was back in place, and I chuckled. “I can’t believe we did that.”
“We’ve shared everything else,” he said with a wink. “It only seems fitting.”
His hand was on my hip while the other was stroking my cheek, and I was stunned that I had such an overpowering desire to kiss him.
That was not part of the deal.
I slipped off his lap and found my jean shorts before sliding them on.
“We don’t want to make things weird or cross any lines that we can’t come back from,” I reminded him.
A lazy smile settled on his face. “How was that for you?”
“It was so much better than I even expected.” I shrugged.
“And you came with my dick in your mouth, didn’t you?” he said, reaching for his water as if we were discussing the weather.
“Yes.”
“That’s because it can be a turn-on when you please your partner. You were responding to me, and that’s fucking sexy as hell.”
I covered my eyes with my hand for a moment as I processed his words.
This was Cutler.
I’d just had his dick in my mouth and my hand between my thighs.
What universe was I living in right now?
Maybe my favorite universe of all.
He pulled my hand away from my face, and his gaze locked with mine. “No hiding. We don’t do that.”
I nodded. “I was surprised how turned on I was, especially after I’d just had your head between my legs. I didn’t expect that.”
“Good. And you liked my mouth on you?”
I nodded. “I did. I’m kind of irritated that I waited so long to do that.”
“I’m not. It’ll live in my head rent-free for the rest of my life.” He leaned back, glancing up at the sky.
I leaned back beside him. “Is it always like that?”
“Honestly?” He paused to think it over. “No. But it’s always good. But this I would describe more like ‘epic.’”
“Epic,” I said, repeating the word with a laugh. “I like it.”
“Your pussy is as magical as you are.”
We both continued staring up at the sky as it darkened right before our eyes.
“Thank you. I feel more confident now about the future.” I sighed.
He stilled for a moment and I peeked up at him, unsure what I’d said to have him going quiet on me.
And then he leaned forward and kissed the top of my head gently. “Good. You should feel confident about everything, Jeege.”
I was grateful that nothing felt different between us.
There was no discomfort or awkwardness between us.
He’d given me what I needed, and there’d been no hesitation.
I was the luckiest girl in the world to call Cutler Heart my best friend.
Cutler and I had entered a slightly gray area, yet nothing had changed. We’d gone back home that night and acted just like we always did.
And over the past few weeks, we’d worked together, eaten dinner together, and continued our normal routine.
“Are you excited to see Mel?” he asked.
Melody Chadwick was one of my best girlfriends.
She was Cutler’s cousin. She and I met when we were young and had grown really close over the years, especially the summers when I’d interned for her aunt Emilia a few years back when I was in college.
She was five years younger than me, and I absolutely adored her.
“I am.” I glanced down at my phone to check the time. “She should be here in about fifteen minutes.”
“You haven’t seen her since you left for Paris, right?” he asked as he took a sip of his beer.
“Yep. She was going to come out this summer to visit me, but obviously I left before that could happen.” I chuckled as my eyes zoomed in on his large hand, wrapped around the bottle. I noticed things like this on Cutler now.
The size of his hands.
The edge of his jaw.
The bob of his throat when he swallowed.
“Well, I’d rather her visit you here anyway, because then I get to be with both of you.” He smirked.
Cutler and Melody had always been close.
“I’ve noticed you haven’t gone out in a few days. It’s not because of what happened, is it?” I asked. “Is it awkward for you now because I’m here? I just don’t want to mess up your dating life.”
I’d basically asked him to please me sexually, and now I was self-conscious that he wasn’t going out with other women because he was uncomfortable that I was here.
And I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I was relieved he hadn’t brought a woman home, even though I knew that wasn’t fair of me to ask that of him.
I was the one who’d pushed for this, and I was the one to make the rules.
His eyebrow arched. “Are you worried about me, Jeege?”
“I just, you know, I don’t want you to feel weird now because I’m staying in your house, and I, um, we did that stuff, and that might have weirded you out, and now you feel guilty to go out.”
I was still speaking when he stepped forward and pressed a finger to my lips.
“I’m not weirded out. I didn’t go out when you were in Paris.
I hadn’t been for a few months before that.
I haven’t had sex in several months, I told you that.
I’m just not feeling it.” He shrugged. “So, having you come on my lips was the highlight of my year. Watching you take my cock between your lips was a close second. And I know we have these rules in place, and I respect them, because it’s what you want.
But personally, I have no desire to be with anyone else right now.
I wouldn’t mind a few more lessons—you know, to make sure you know what to ask for down the road. ”
My breath hitched in my throat, and I felt my entire body go very still. For a brief second I couldn’t tell if the heavy thud in my chest was shock or something more, something I had no business feeling for him. I searched his gaze, desperate to see even a hint that he was teasing me.
He wasn’t.
I was about to speak when the doorbell rang.
It didn’t ring once. It didn’t ring twice. It rang at least six times, and I knew it was Melody.
This was the longest we’d gone without seeing one another in years.
“Mel’s here. Stop worrying. I’m good.” He kissed my hair and walked past me to get the door.
Leaving me to sit with what he’d just said.