27. Astrid #2
Declan jumps in. “Everything is about motivation, Scott. I went from a tiny island in the Atlantic, running around the halls of an ancient castle, to conference rooms in downtown Portland, Oregon. And now I’m here.
My versatility has everything to do with my intentions and the motivating factors behind them. ” He squeezes my hip.
I melt against him a little more.
Scott nods as if he loves that answer.
I love that answer too. I start to look up at Declan, but something catches my eye.
Scott’s phone.
I focus on it. It’s pointed at us. It has been this entire time. And it hits me—he’s recording this. He’s been recording this.
I try to go back over what I’ve said, but I have no idea what I’ve shared. I have way too many emotions filling my head and heart, and my brain feels fuzzy.
Maggie and Mark have been standing on either side of Scott, taking notes as we’ve talked. Maggie has a small recorder that she’s holding out toward us.
“So, does that mean you’re staying?” Maggie asks Declan. “Is this more than just a visit?”
I hold my breath.
He’s hinted that if I’m living in Rebel, this is where he wants to be. Things have been going well. He said he’s crazy about me and that he’s been falling for me. I have definitely been falling for him.
But are things different now? Now that I couldn’t…
I shut that down quickly. Declan isn’t going to reject me and everything that’s been going on between us because of what just happened in my office.
He’s not that guy. He has been patient and amazing about my pain and helping me through it.
There was a very good chance that the first time we tried sex, it was going to go exactly the way it did.
We’ll try it again. It will go much better next time. And I know that Declan will be all in on giving it another chance.
But how long can I expect him to stick with this?
His grandfather is willing to annul the marriage the day after tomorrow.
We might not have that chance again. It’s the easiest thing. It’s the best way out that doesn’t make either of us the bad guy.
I should cut Declan loose.
“Yes, I am,” Declan tells the reporters, his voice clear and firm.
Maggie, Scott, and Mark all look surprised.
“Wow,” Maggie says. “So you’re done with Portland?”
Again, emotions are flooding through my body, and I have to force myself to pay attention to what he says.
“I don’t want you to put it that way,” Declan says.
“I love Portland. We’ll go back regularly.
My business is there. Iris Lee will be running the business as my chief executive officer.
I’ll be there whenever I’m needed. I will continue to serve as president of the company.
And I’ll be able to do a lot of it from here.
” He looks down at me. “A lot of really important things happened for both of us in Portland. But our home is here now.”
My heart trips.
Home.
Our home.
“You won’t miss the high society?” Scott asks. “The penthouse? The nightlife?”
Declan shakes his head without hesitation. “No.”
That’s it. Just ‘no’. No qualification, no further explanation.
“You lived there for nearly twenty years. Your lifestyle there was quite different from here,” Scott presses.
Declan nods. “It turns out I was in the wrong place all this time.”
My stomach flips, and I find myself leaning into him, absorbing his warmth.
That’s how I feel about Rebel. I didn’t feel it less than a week in. It took me a couple of months. But I feel a very distinct sense of ‘coming home’ now that I’m here.
Maybe this can work out, after all.
Maybe.
I'm sure my smile seems a little more genuine now.
Of course, Scott has now lowered his phone and is scribbling in his notebook.
Behind the reporters, I catch sight of some people I was anticipating seeing today. Oh, this is perfect timing.
“One of the important reasons for Declan to stay is family,” I say to the reporters. “Alex is here now, of course, with Nora. And I don’t know if you realize, but Declan has a sister nearby.”
I reach out a hand toward the woman standing directly behind Scott. Scott shifts to the side, looking back as Fiona O’Grady steps forward with a big smile, taking my hand.
I tug her forward with a smile. “I’m so happy to see you,” I tell Fiona as I envelop her in a hug.
Right behind her is her big, bearded husband, Knox. He has an arm around their daughter, Saoirse. Saoirse is thirteen-going-on-forty. She’s full of sass and humor and is just as smart and passionate as her mom.
I have seen Fiona and her family a couple of times since moving here, but I know they haven’t seen Declan since the Christmas that we first went home as a married couple.
The one I ruined for him.
“Did you warn him?” Fiona whispers in my ear.
“No,” I admit.
I feel her take a deep breath, then I pull back and step to the side so that she can see her big brother.
Fiona is a fearless animal rights activist and rescuer, but as she looks up at Declan, I see a vulnerability that I know is extremely rare.
Knox steps forward, resting a hand on her shoulder.
“Hey, Dec,” Fiona says.
I study my husband’s face.
He doesn’t speak at first. Because he’s too emotional.
I slide an arm around his waist now, giving him the reassuring, comforting squeeze that he gave me earlier.
I feel the deep shuddering breath he takes before he says, “Fiona. God, it’s good to see you.”
Very in character, she simply steps forward, her arms out, and I get out of the way so she can hug him.
He wraps his arms around her immediately, pressing his cheek against the top of her head.
I know Fiona’s other brothers very well, and it’s always funny to me how short she is compared to the three men she shares parents with.
Their hug lasts for several long moments before she finally lets him go.
“Astrid invited us,” she says.
He gives me a smile that says a lot—thank you, you’re amazing, I want to kiss you so badly right now—and nods. “I’m so glad.”
“She also said you’re playing tonight?”
He chuckles. “Filling in for someone.”
“I remember you from Christmas,” Saoirse says, stepping forward.
Declan smiles at her. “I remember you too. Hi, Saoirse.”
“But you weren’t at Christmas this last year.” She looks at me. “Astrid was though.”
Just stab me in the heart, Saoirse.
He gives me a little grin. “I had to stay in Portland,” he says, gallantly not throwing me under the bus.
“But he’ll be at Christmas this year,” I say, slipping my hand into his and linking our fingers.
Unless…
No, even if our marriage is annulled, we’ll both go to Cara for Christmas
He gives me a squeeze that says, Fuck yeah, I will.
“Have you ever heard of Super Circus Hunting Party?”
He shakes his head. “I have not.”
“It’s a multi-player online video game,” she says. “It can go on for weeks. You play in teams.” She sighs. “Cian cheats. Badly.”
Declan laughs at the mention of his youngest brother. “Is that right?”
“Yeah, but his daughter, Mariah, is so cool, and she plays too.”
Declan nods. “I remember Mariah.”
“I’ll teach you to play before Christmas, and then we can kick his and Torin’s butts at it, okay?” she asks.
“That sounds amazing.”
His voice is rough, and I get choked up watching my always put-together and in-charge husband choke up over the idea of playing a video game with his niece against his younger brothers.
Saoirse’s grin is big and bright. “Awesome.” Then she throws herself at him, hugging him as if she now knows everything she needs to know.
Knox chuckles and extends his hand after Saoirse lets Declan go.
“It’s nice to see you again.”
“You, too. I hope we get to see each other a lot more,” Declan says.
“No doubt about it.”
I take a deep breath. This is going very well. So far so good.
Now I just need to get through the entire rest of the evening with a smile, even if it’s a little forced.
At least now all I have to do is go sit in the stands and watch a hockey game.
And hope that my husband doesn’t score any goals, so I don’t have to freaking sing.
Nearly four hours later, I’m breathing easier.
Declan hasn’t scored at all, and we’re down to two minutes left in the game.
“We’re voting again?”
I look to my left and laugh. Iris Lee is here, and she is quite simply appalled by bonkers hockey.
She and Miles arrived a couple of hours before the game started, but Miles was busy getting caught up to speed with not only playing hockey tonight but also pretending to be a knight and playing hockey as a joust.
Iris is not into crawfish boils or Zydeco music, so she decided to wait at Miles’s house until it was time to come to the game.
Apparently, Miles was able to get hold of Wes and pay an exorbitant amount of money to get electricity hooked up and Beckett delivered two bedrooms' worth of furniture to his only partially remodeled house.
“We always vote on the penalties,” Sutton tells her, for the fifth time. This time she doesn’t even look up from typing her vote into the app on her phone.
I’m very proud of that app. It is specifically for my hockey league so that fans can participate in activities during the games, as well as for them to give input outside of game time on things like what new snow cone flavor we should try at the concession stand, what minor-league hockey team mascot we should invite to one of our games to have a dance off with Rougie and Rascal, and other important questions.
“What is this penalty for?” Iris asks.
“The ref thinks Beckett was a little rough with Carter,” Sutton says, a smirk on her lips.
“You mean, the guy who’s still lying on the ice?” Iris asks.
Sutton and I exchange a look and laugh. “Yup.”
Iris still pulls out her phone and swipes across the screen. “So what are our choices here?”
She says she doesn’t understand it or like it, but she has been participating in all of the votes.
“Beckett can either go sit in the penalty box, sing his version of “Oops I Did It Again” to Carter, or dance for all of us,” Sutton tells her.
“He has his own version of “Oops I Did It Again”?” Iris asks.
“He needs it,” Sutton says.
“Well, the penalty box would be the most efficient,” Iris says.