Chapter 21
A week had gone by since Callie arrived.
We went to Lina’s several times, and Callie had come over here a couple of times.
Lucy was getting bigger by the day and opened her eyes a couple of days ago.
I’d gotten better at running—running longer and longer each day without being winded.
We did most of our wrestling inside, as January brought colder days than last month.
We went for a long run this morning and then came inside. We pushed the chairs next to the kitchen counter, and I put Lucy in her little rolled blanket on the chair. He unrolled the mat onto the living room floor.
I kicked off my shoes, walked to the mat, and started bouncing on my feet.
He was finishing his coffee, standing against the counter, staring intently at me.
He walked onto the mat, kicking his shoes off and pulling his shirt over his head.
I dropped my eyes. I enjoyed the view way too much—I couldn’t deny that he was attractive.
“Hold your shoulders back,” he said.
“I am…” I said as I rolled my shoulders back.
He curled his fingers toward me, beckoning me. I stepped forward, throwing a punch at his chest, and he shifted to the side, dodging me.
“You lean before you throw your punch. Anyone can see it coming,” he said.
“I don’t know how to fix that,” I said.
He walked behind me. “You need to rotate your hip, not lean your shoulder forward.”
He placed one hand on my right hip. “Throw a punch forward,” he said.
I threw a punch forward, and he squeezed my hip. “Rotate here.”
He stepped around in front of me, his hand still on my hip.
“Now, throw a punch, rotate where my hand is,” he said.
I threw a punch forward, and he leaned back, my fist only grazing him. He put his other hand on my shoulder.
“Again,” he said.
I punched forward as he pushed my shoulder back.
The force pushing back made me stumble forward a little.
We were inches away from each other. His light brown eyes stared at my dark brown eyes.
He leaned forward another inch, and our lips were nearly touching.
My heart started racing, I held my breath.
I moved forward to kiss—No. We couldn’t do this.
I stepped back quickly. My eyes widened at him, his eyes wide at me.
“We shouldn’t do that,” I whispered.
“Yeah…” he said.
I walked off the mat and went into the bathroom. I stood in front of the mirror and stared at myself. I turned on the cold water, cupped it into my hands, and splashed it on my face. I wanted to kiss him. So badly. No. I couldn’t like him like that.
He was a friend. He needed to stay a friend.
Letting myself lose control was what got me into this situation.
Letting my heart and stomach lead me. What did I want?
It couldn’t be the guy who held me captive.
I was only a friend to him, or at least that’s what I was telling myself.
He leaned into me, too. Damn it, Zalayuh.
I splashed another handful of water onto my face.
I walked out of the bathroom, and he wasn’t on the mat or inside anymore.
I walked over to the mat and bounced around more, throwing out fake punches.
I focused on rotating my hip and not my shoulder.
It felt awkward, but after focusing on my hips and shoulders, it started to feel natural.
I stayed there for a good while, moving around and practicing my punches.
Everything started to ache, so I called it quits.
I checked on Lucy, and she was still sound asleep in the chair.
I grabbed my things and went to the bathroom for a shower.
Callie convinced Quinn to do a small bonfire that evening with some of their cousins.
He hesitated, but Callie gave him a little pouty lip and said how he hadn’t gotten to really do much in six months with her.
He didn’t give her an immediate answer, waiting until he asked me.
I didn’t object because it didn’t feel like it was my place to do.
This was his cabin, and she made a compelling argument.
After a few hours, Quinn came back inside.
I wasn’t sure where he went, but his car was still in the driveway.
I fed Lucy twice while he was gone. He didn’t say anything, going straight to the bathroom and taking a shower.
I wasn’t sure what to say, or if I should say anything at all.
He came out of the bathroom, and my breath hitched, staring at him.
“Do you still want to go to the city with me?” he asked.
“What about Lucy?” I asked.
“Um… I guess we can bring her with us, or drop her off with my Titi,” he said.
“I wouldn’t want to pawn her off on someone,” I said.
“Then we bring her and stuff to make a few bottles while we’re gone,” he said.
“Alright, I guess that settles that,” I said.
“We should probably bring a little box for her to sit in while we’re in the store,” he said.
“What about my shoe box?”
“That should work,” he said.
We gathered up stuff, put on jackets, and got into the car.
Baton Rouge was nearly an hour away from us.
He wanted to go to Walmart and a couple of other stores to get supplies.
Callie still had his truck and would be bringing chairs for everyone to sit on.
I wasn’t sure what all we were planning to get.
Once we got onto Interstate 10, he sped up quickly, my back pressing into my chair.
A surge of energy ran through my body, taking my breath away.
The first night we had the car, we got on the same interstate.
He hit one hundred and twenty miles per hour.
My heart pounded out of my chest then. I thought I was going to throw up, but I didn’t. Afterward, I felt exhilarated.
“I’m sorry I tried to kiss you,” he said, breaking the silence between us.
“I… um… It’s okay…” I muttered. He tried to kiss me. I thought I tried to kiss him. This wasn’t helping anything. “We need only to be friends… I just now got to the point where I don’t hate you,” I told him.
“Oh, so you don’t hate me?” he teased.
“I don't… but I don’t like you either,” I said.
“Yet… you just called us friends,” he said, flashing me a smile.
“Yeah… I guess I did,” I said.
“I’ll take being friends,” he said.
He stomped down on the gas again, passing a car. He really did love this car and the need for speed. He let off, sliding back into the right lane.
“Do you still like Mad Dog 20/20?”
My head snapped toward him. “How did you know that?”
He sighed. “You don’t remember me being at any of the parties at your house? In your neighborhood?”
I stared at him, my head tilted. I thought back to all of the parties and all the people there. Sometimes there were so many people, I didn’t even know their names. Most of them drank and were doing their own thing. How hadn’t I noticed him?
“Yeah… I didn’t think so,” he said. He pursed his lips and continued staring down the road.
“I don’t know how I wouldn’t have noticed you…” I said, almost a whisper.
“Because I’m mixed,” he said.
My head shot back again. “What? No—”
“Then what?”
“You weren’t the only black or mixed person that came to our house… something you would remember if you can remember what I drink.”
“Then why?” he asked.
“I actually didn’t like the Mad Dog… I prefer a Blue Lagoon, but my brother said I was acting extra, and Mad Dog was easier,” I said. I wasn't about to say the real reason out loud.
“Deflection… something you’re good at,” he said.
“Learning from you,” I said.
“Fair… So… Blue Lagoon it’s what—”
“Vodka, blue curacao, and lemonade,” I answered him.
“Alright… then we shall get that,” he said.
I looked at him again, blinking my eyes at him. “Are you trying to get me drunk?”
“I… Uh… No… I just figured you might want to drink with the rest of us. You can drink as much or as little as you want,” he said.
“And what do you like?” I asked.
He laughed. “Shine.”
“Oh… do they have shine here?” I asked. Moonshine was common where we were in the mountains of Tennessee, Kentucky, and Virginia.
He laughed again, deeply this time. “Yes, but they don’t make shine like they do back home, but I know where to get some.”
“Oh, okay, I never really cared for it when my brother got it,” I said.
“That’s because he got rot gut… he was a cheap ass… no offense,” he said.
“I literally don’t know what that is?” I said.
“Just cheap, harsher shine,” he said.
“Oh.”
“But… that’s not what I’ll be drinking tonight. I haven’t drunk in months… and I won’t be starting with shine,” he said.
“So… what?”
“Maybe I’ll try the…what did you say? Blue Lagoon?” he asked.
“Yeah… but I also like Seagram coolers,” I said.
“We can get both… gives us all options tonight for anyone who wants to drink,” he said.
“What else are we getting?”
“We are gonna grill some steaks, bake some potatoes, corn on the cob, and have a little fire,” he said.
“It’s cold out,” I said.
“The low will be like fifty, so not too bad. I might fight the grill a bit, but we have jackets and a fire,” he said.
“Alright,” I said.
Once we pulled into Walmart, Lucy was stirring, so I decided to go ahead and feed her before we went into the store.
Then I tucked her back into the shoe box, and we carried her into the store.
I set the box in the upper spot where babies sat.
I was worried they would say something and kick us out, but no one said anything.
Lucy slept the entire time, something she still did a lot of.
Quinn didn’t like the steak options there, so we drove to Kroger's. He found some good rib eyes, muttering something about good marbling. I was more there for the ride. I didn’t ask for anything, even when he pressed me for anything I wanted.
I hated taking things from people or letting them buy me stuff.