Chapter 19
Amanda
“A manda, what in the world is going on with you?”
My lips drew into a thin, tight line on my face. I drummed my fingers on the conference table. We were supposed to be discussing charity business, but obviously that was going to have to wait until I dealt with the inevitable fallout from my recent actions.
When I didn’t answer Jennifer, she heaved a sigh and reached out to take my hand.
“It’s okay, Amanda. You can confide in me. Please tell me what’s going on?”
“We’re trying to have a meeting, that’s what’s going on,” I replied. “Shouldn’t we be discussing the upcoming charity ball in London? That’s a lot more important, I think.”
“Not to me, it isn’t. You’re my friend, Amanda. We’ve been friends for a long time. Long before all of this. You can confide in me.”
“I’m not sure what you want me to say.”
“Maybe we could start with this—why did you run away from the mansion? Why have you turned off your phone?”
“Because I’m trying to avoid dealing with Evan,” I said.
“He’s going crazy looking for you, you know. He’s called me and Marshall at least a dozen times in the last twenty-four hours. I haven’t told him anything except that I knew you were safe.”
“I appreciate that.”
“You’re going to have to confront this sooner or later, you know.”
“No, I don’t know.” My voice sounded sullen and petulant, even to my ears. “I don’t have to deal with it. I can just go right back to living my normal life again. The life I had before I ever met Evan Jones.”
Jennifer cocked an eyebrow.
“Amanda, come on. Don’t even try to pretend like it’s going to be that easy.”
“Why shouldn’t it be easy?” I covered my face with my hands. “Please don’t tell Evan where I am. I switched off my phone so he couldn’t track me, all right? I just want to go back to the way things were.”
“You can’t just walk away from this. It’s going to have to be a more conscious uncoupling than that.”
“I can just walk away,” I said, a bit loudly as I jabbed my finger at her. I felt like I had a great point to make. One I had been just dying to get out of me. “I can totally walk away, Jennifer. I mean, you’re right. If… if this had been a real relationship, with a real wedding and a real marriage, I couldn’t just walk away. I’d have to do it a lot more messy than this. However!”
I held up my finger before she could cut me off.
“However, this is not a real relationship. It’s a fake marriage, and I’m a fake wife. Therefore, I can just make a clean break and walk right the fuck away from everything that has anything to do with Evan Jones.”
Jennifer gazed at me for a long time and then reached out to cup her hand over my own.
“You know I’ll support you in whatever decision you make. I just want to make sure you understand exactly what you’re getting yourself into.”
“I understand what I’m getting myself out of,” I muttered.
She waited for me to explain myself for a bit. When I did not, she gently began to pry.
“You know, I thought that you and Evan were getting along a lot better. At least, that’s what Jenna said.”
“Jenna doesn’t know half as much as she thinks she does,” I snapped. “Yeah, we were getting along okay, I guess.”
Jennifer arched a brow. I heaved a long sigh.
“Okay, so it was more than just sort of okay. It was magical. It was great passionate sex at night and great companionship during the day. It was long hours in the office and long hours coming down from it later. I was liking it… maybe even loving that life, until it all came crashing down.”
“It came crashing down?”
I really did not want to give her the gory details. I really didn’t. All I wanted to do was to put Evan Jones out of my mind on a permanent basis. Wash that man right out of my hair, as it were.
“I let myself be duped, Jennifer. I duped myself, I should say.”
I hung my head between my hands and stared at the table. The wood had been polished to such a sheen I could see my reflection. I looked pretty miserable to my own eyes.
“I duped myself into believing that it could be real. That it was real. That we were a real husband and wife and there was real love between us. All right?”
I shook my head and lifted my gaze to meet her sympathetic expression.
“I was wrong, though. It wasn’t real, and it never could be. No matter how much I wanted it to be.”
I fought back the tears stinging the corners of my eyes.
“I should have listened to my gut, Jennifer. I should have listened to my gut. I was so stupid to believe it was anything other than what it was. A sham.”
Jennifer squeezed my arm.
“Are you sure all of it was a sham? I mean, obviously I’m on the outside looking in here, but it seemed to me that he really liked you. A lot. And I’m going to go out on a limb and say that you really like him. A lot.”
I appreciated what she was trying to do. I almost told her all the gory details about how he was looking to replace me with a supermodel or something. Instead, I gave voice to something that had been bouncing around in my head ever since I decided to leave the manor.
“Powerful men like Evan, there’s something about them that you just have to accept.”
“What’s that?”
“They’re used to getting what they want, and they see people as mere tools.” My face scrunched up into a scowl. “They might change their tactics, their strategies, but they’ll never change their nature.”
“That’s a very cynical worldview.”
“You said it yourself about Marshall. You didn’t change him. You just helped the nurturing, kind man on the inside come out to play in the sun. I’m not so sure there’s a kind man hiding inside of Evan Jones, Jennifer. I’m not so sure of that at all.”
“Are you sure you understand his character so thoroughly? I mean, there’s a degree of separation in the mere transactional aspect of your relationship with him. Maybe he’s hiding his real self, his real feelings, just very deep?”
I felt a flash of anger. Not at Jennifer, who was doing her best to help me talk it through. With Evan, for disappointing me.
“He used me, Jennifer. He used me, and now that he’s had what he wanted, he’s ready to discard me and replace me with someone new.”
“Oh my God,” she gasped. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure. He has candidates lined up and everything.”
Jennifer got up out of her chair and hugged me tight.
“You know that whatever happens, I’ve always got your back, honey.”
“I know.”
I hugged her back.
“I don’t know how to handle all of this,” I said with a sigh. “But for now, I just want to get back to work and try to forget about it for a little while, you know?”
The door popped open. Jake and Ramone swept into the meeting room, looking a little bit harried.
“I’m sorry we’re late,” Ramone said. “We were putting some finishing touches to the presentation.”
“Yeah, because somebody kept changing their mind at the last minute,” Jake said with a scowl directed at Ramone. His gaze darted back to me and Jennifer, and he figured out something was wrong.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
Ramone gave me a long look and probably realized that it was neither the time nor the place for this.
“Nothing,” Ramone said. “Just give Amanda some space.”
“Are you sure?”
Ramone smacked him on the back of the head.
“Just get the PowerPoint ready, dummy. I said to give the lady some space. So, give her space.”
Jake grumbled, but he prepared the presentation. Ramone stepped up in front of the screen with a laser pointer. The first image was of Jake scratching his head .
“What’s the biggest conundrum facing us as charity workers?” Ramone asked.
“Um, not enough hours in the day?” Jennifer said.
“Long flights?” I added.
Ramone grimaced at us.
“No, it’s really simple. The fact is most people around the world think of charity as something they only do at certain times of the year. Like on a holiday, or what have you. What if we could make it seem like charity was something that wasn’t for a special occasion, but an everyday occurrence?”
I looked between him and Jake, flabbergasted.
“You guys came up with this idea yourselves?”
Their heads bobbed.
“What’s wrong with it?” Jake asked.
“Nothing’s wrong, it’s just really ambitious, that’s all.”
“I told you she would act like this,” Jake said. “She doesn’t think we can pull it off.”
“That’s the point of the presentation, dude. We’re trying to convince her. Speaking of the presentation, will you look at your itinerary? We’re supposed to be on the fifth slide already.”
They got their act together, and the longer I listened, the more intrigued I became. They’d already recruited an astonishing number of celebrities, both from traditional media and internet influencers. Not only that, but they’d also gotten the celebs to agree to something I never thought was possible.
The celebrities and influencers were going to make posting about the charity work a regular occurrence, presenting it as a part of their everyday life, to try and normalize it for everyone who followed them. It was all about using their influence for the greater good, which a surprising number of them were willing to do absolutely for free .
Jake and Ramone wrapped up their presentation, speaking the last line together.
“So, this will bring saving the world to the next level!”
I stood up and applauded. Jennifer smiled and gave them a thumbs up.
“Bravo, gentlemen. Well done indeed…”
My voice trailed off. I looked at the PowerPoint slide, then at presentation notes splayed out in front of Ramone.
“Um, what did you just say? About taking it to the next level?”
“That’s our slogan!” Ramone said, his eyes burning with pride. “The project is called Next Level.”
“Project Next Level,” I repeated, sitting back in my seat. I’d fucked up big time.
“Yeah, take a look.”
And then they handed me the same damn folder I’d seen on my fake husband’s desk. He wasn’t looking for a replacement for me. He was looking for people to join the charity bandwagon and take it literally to the next level.
“I made a huge mistake.”
They all looked at me funny, but I shook it off. A happy energy seized hold of me.
“I’m so sorry,” I said, hugging both Jake and Ramone. “You guys did great. Knocked it out of the park.”
“Um, okay,” Jake said, looking confused.
“Now, I have to go and call Evan. I have to explain… everything.”
I turned my phone back on as I left the boardroom. As soon as I did a ton of messages popped up, most of them from Evan. They popped up too rapidly for me to make out what they said, except for the last one, which was the most recent text of all. I noticed that there was a paperclip symbol and tapped on the attachment icon.
My eyes widened when I saw the label on the attachment.
Divorce Papers.PDF