Chapter 16 - Abby
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Abby
The hardwood floor is cold under my bare feet as I pad out of my room and into the kitchen. I usually go to sleep with socks on but end up kicking them off at some point through the night.
I swear, half my selection of socks ends up trapped between the mattress and the sheets at the foot of the bed. I was too tired to track down a pair this morning, though, before coming in search of caffeine.
I pop a pod into the machine and stare into space as the building aroma eases me into a more solid state of consciousness.
Being a nurse and a mom, I’m pretty dependent on caffeine. I’m fully aware it is not the healthiest way to live, but you do what you’ve got to do.
I pull my cinnamon creamer from the fridge, pouring a healthy dose into my cup. The first sip is pure heaven sliding down my throat.
I let out a sigh of relief, quickly taking several more gulps.
Who’s out there this morning? The thought pops into my head as I turn to look out the window over the sink, giving me a perfect view of the street in front of Leah’s house.
Every day for the past week, there has been someone out there watching over Leah’s house, keeping her safe. Kane, Linc, and Wyatt have taken the majority of the shifts, but a few other guys from the club have been there, too.
Whenever I’m home, I bring whoever’s out there something to drink or a snack when I can. I’m beyond grateful for everything they’re doing, and it feels like the least I can do.
Leah seems to be staying inside her house for the most part. I don’t blame her. I wouldn’t want to be wandering around either if my abuser was at large. But I’ve seen her bring out some sandwiches to the guys here and there.
Bringing the warm cup to my lips, I take another sip. Wyatt’s the one on duty this morning. Luckily, I already know how to make his coffee.
He likes it with even more creamer than me. His brother, however, is the complete opposite, preferring to drink it black.
The memory of the morning I learned just how Linc takes his coffee floats into my mind.
I can’t believe I ran out here in only a pair of pajama shorts and a hoodie. The morning air is chilly against my exposed skin.
In my defense, I have a good reason to be out here right now.
Hearing my approach, Linc turns in my direction. He eyes me warily as I quickly walk toward him.
“Where are the rest of your clothes?” he asks.
“Inside,” I say, hopping from foot to foot in an attempt to warm up. “Do you take your coffee like your brother does?”
“Fuck no,” Linc says, face pulling into a grimace. “Just black.”
“Boring…”
“Why ruin something that’s already perfect?” he asks, raising his brow.
Maybe I’m still half asleep, but it really feels like he’s talking about something other than coffee now.
I can feel the heat spreading over my cheeks. It’s cold out here. That’s why my cheeks are turning red.
Then, like a total weirdo, I dart back to my house. I swear I hear a faint chuckle carrying through the breeze as I run up the porch steps, but I don’t look back.
I grab a travel mug from the cupboard and start another cup brewing. I should probably buy some disposable cups, but I didn’t think of it while I was at the store picking up things for both me and Leah.
They have all been leaving their empty mugs and glasses on my doorstep whenever they’re done with something, so I guess it doesn’t really matter.
I spin my ring around my thumb, waiting for the coffee maker to finish its thing. Kane.
My mind wanders to the first morning I nervously brought him coffee.
I hesitate at the front door, second-guessing my decision to take Kane some coffee without asking him how he wants it.
I remember how he made his cup on that single morning we spent together in the tiny kitchen in my old house. Black with a splash of milk.
If he doesn’t like it, who cares? He doesn’t have to drink it if he doesn’t want to.
With the mug in hand, I march out to where he is sitting on the sidewalk beside his motorcycle. It’s the same one I saw parked in front of Benny’s all those years ago. I guess some things never change.
I take a seat beside him, handing over the caffeinated peace offering.
“Thank you,” he says, taking a hearty sip. He stands with the cup still pressed to his lips. His eyes roam over to me. “You remembered.”
He says it as fact, not a question.
“I did.” I tuck my hands into my sweatshirt sleeves, keeping them out of the chilly air.
He nods and takes another drink. It looks like he wants to say something else, but he doesn’t.
We sit side by side, watching the sun rise the rest of the way. With every inch of sun revealed, a little more warmth seeps into the air around us.
The silence between us isn’t awkward. It’s peaceful in a way you can only feel with someone you are completely comfortable around.
It took hardly any time for Kane and I to get to this point. We felt it back then, and obviously, it still exists between us now.
I slide my hand out to scratch my leg. Kane’s eyes latch onto my hand… my thumb, specifically.
He gently picks up my hand, running a finger over the silver band that still sits on the very finger he slid it on three years ago.
“You still have this?” he asks in disbelief.
“Yeah,” I say, not knowing how he’s going to react.
It could go one of two ways. Either he’ll be creeped out that I kept it for this long, or he’ll think it’s sweet that I still wear it.
“Why?” he asks breathlessly. His eyes move from my hand to my eyes.
I drag in a breath. “It was important to you, so it became important to me. I wear it every day.”
His eyes widen in surprise. He swallows thickly, looking almost like he’s in pain. Eventually, he lets my hand go and picks up the cup he set beside him.
I stay there for several more minutes. The air around us is a little more tense but still comfortable.
I only move to stand when I need to get ready for work. I can throw things together pretty quickly, but I still need a few minutes so I don’t look like a complete troll.
“Thanks for the coffee,” he says, looking up at me with those soulful eyes that seem to be thinking something other than what he’s saying. Or not saying…
“Thank you for watching out for my friend.”
Now, with Wyatt’s mug in one hand and mine in the other, I walk out to where he’s straddling his own motorcycle.
“That’s an interesting position to find someone in so early in the morning,” I say, handing him the mug.
He chuckles, taking it from my hand. His fingers graze along mine as I let go.
“What can I say? I love my baby.” He pats the side of his motorcycle with his free hand.
I roll my eyes, leaning my hip against the front of it. My leg is almost touching his but not quite.
We both bring our cups up to our mouths, blow on the warm liquid, then take a sip.
“Look at us, all in sync,” he says with a wink.
“Does that really wake you up?” I nod at his coffee. There can’t be enough coffee in there to really do anything, so it must be the sugar.
He shrugs one shoulder. “I don’t really need the caffeine. I’m usually ready to go for the day without it. I just like the flavor.”
That I can believe. Wyatt always seems like he has more energy and happiness than he knows what to do with.
I’m sure he has his days when his world isn’t all rainbows and sunshine. I love his specific brand of levity, though.
I’ve gotten to know all the club members more over the last week, but especially these three guys who are each other’s family. There’s a place in my heart for all of them now in their own unique ways.
I don’t really know what to do with the feelings building inside of me. I’m starting to like all three of them, but I can’t go down that road for so many reasons.
Other people in this town have learned how to navigate polyamorous relationships, but me? Is that something I could do?
And is that something they would be even remotely on board with?
I shake my head because this train of thought is pointless. It doesn’t matter if I have feelings for them. It doesn’t matter if their feelings are returned or not.
It doesn’t matter because Maverick and Oliver are more important than anything that is making my heart beat a little faster in my chest this week.
Kane, Linc, and Wyatt are my friends. Any other feelings I may have will stay firmly locked away and never see the light of day.