Chapter 1 #2
Claire and Ellis entertained often. Claire usually enjoyed arranging events like this one, which was to raise money for a local charity that helped women start over and provided them with temporary shelter and business clothes for interviewing.
They were also celebrating a huge win for Ellis’s employer.
They’d recently landed a new client who was so happy with their work that he’d doubled the amount of his initial investment in their funds.
Claire worked with a caterer that she’d used many times before to design a tempting menu of passed appetizers and a carving station.
They also had freshly rolled sushi and signature cocktails.
A florist delivered several arrangements of mostly white flowers, which were scattered around their kitchen and huge living room, which was open concept with plenty of room for thirty to forty people to mingle.
French doors in the living room opened into a library that Ellis sometimes used as a home office.
Bookcases filled with leather-bound classics lined the walls, and the dark wood floors gleamed in the candlelight.
Several buttery-soft leather club chairs scattered around the room offered quieter spots for breakaway conversations.
Claire had been looking forward to the party.
But in the week prior, she started feeling uneasy and even a bit queasy.
Things hadn’t been good with Ellis for well over a year.
And if she was being honest with herself, it had been even longer, but she just hadn’t realized that they were growing apart until it became obvious.
Ellis had always been a workaholic, but almost two years ago, he started putting in longer hours than usual, sometimes coming home at eight or even nine o’clock.
He always called her ahead of time to let her know he was working late, so she never thought much of it.
She knew it was the nature of the business.
There were also the nights that he wined and dined clients and stayed out even later.
He’d tell her all about those dinners the next day, the wines they’d had and the incredible steaks and the after-dinner bourbons.
Those dinners were more frequent this past year, and he didn’t share the details with her as often.
In retrospect, there were signs that she’d failed to recognize at the time.
So she was aware that she and Ellis were spending less time together.
He spent more time working, and she had Lily and all her many activities.
Claire also kept busy with the group of moms she’d befriended.
They were mostly stay-at-home mothers with husbands who had important, well-paying jobs.
They belonged to the same clubs, worked on the same charity events, went to the same book club.
It was mostly fun, and Claire had made some close friends, but none as close as Rachel.
They’d never lost touch and spoke almost every day.
They’d chatted the morning of the event over coffee before Rachel headed off to work.
Claire had told her then how she’d been feeling off and wasn’t as excited as usual.
“I’m just exhausted. I think I might be coming down with something. I’m hoping the nausea will calm down some before the party.”
“Nausea. Is there a chance you might be…?” Rachel didn’t say the word, but Claire knew what she meant and laughed at the thought.
“It’s doubtful. I’m on the pill for one thing. And I don’t think we’re having sex often enough these days for it to be a possibility.”
“When was the last time?” Rachel pressed.
Claire thought for a moment. “A little over a month ago. I was finally feeling myself again after having a sinus infection, and we went out to dinner and had some good wine.” Ellis had just closed a new client and was in a celebratory mood.
His excitement was contagious, and Claire relaxed, and they had a great night all around.
“Okay. But were you taking an antibiotic? That can cancel birth control, I’ve heard.”
“Oh. I never thought of that.” Claire had a sudden sinking feeling.
She went to Duane Reade immediately after the call and bought two pregnancy tests.
And then she put them on her bathroom counter and went about her day.
She was feeling a little better, so she was hopeful that it was just a stomach bug.
She wasn’t ready to take the test until later that day, after she’d showered and changed and was carefully applying her makeup.
Ellis was on his way home, and their guests were due to arrive in forty-five minutes.
She opened the first pregnancy test, peed on the stick, and waited.
When she saw the result, she immediately opened the second test, went through the motions, and waited for those results. The second test confirmed what the first one said—she was pregnant.
Claire considered telling Ellis before the party but couldn’t bring herself to do it immediately.
He’d arrived home in a hurry and quickly showered and changed before people started arriving.
It still hadn’t fully sunk in that it was real, and Claire wanted his full attention.
So she waited. She sipped club soda with a splash of cranberry and lemon and smiled and made small talk all night.
Finally, a little after eleven, the last guests left.
One of them was a pretty young woman who Claire hadn’t seen before.
Ellis had introduced her as Rebecca, the office’s new receptionist. It was her first job out of college, and Ellis had gushed that she was doing a great job.
He’d mentioned something about her father owning a big company but wanting Rebecca to get experience somewhere else before joining his firm.
Rebecca basked in the compliment, and Claire had thought it was cute at the time.
Rebecca looked about the same age as Claire had been when she first started working at the magazine—when everything about living in the city was all shiny and new.
When Rebecca said goodbye, she didn’t look at Claire, only at Ellis, and her gaze lingered for a long moment before she left.
“I think she might have a crush on you,” Claire teased him.
She expected him to laugh, but instead he looked away, then ran his hand through his hair. He seemed uncomfortable, so Claire decided to change the subject.
“We need to talk actually,” she began.
He looked relieved, which surprised her. “I agree. I’ve been waiting for the right time to talk to you too.”
“You have? What about?” She began to feel uneasy again as Ellis paced back and forth in the room that still needed to be cleaned up, dishes washed and things put away.
“I think we should consider a divorce.”
His words knocked the breath out of her. She knew things hadn’t been great between them for a long time. But she’d assumed it was a natural evolution of a marriage. When she met with her mom group, most of them had similar issues—their husbands worked too much, and the romance was gone.
“Why?” she’d managed to ask as a terrible thought rushed in. “Is there someone else?”
Ellis looked away and couldn’t meet her eyes. He avoided answering that part of her question. He sighed heavily. “It just seems like we want different things these days. Like we’ve grown apart. It happens.”
Claire frowned. She didn’t disagree, but she sensed there was more. “Is there someone else?” she asked again.
He nodded. “Someone at work. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but we spend so much time together, and she makes me feel young and invincible.”
Claire’s jaw dropped. “Is it Rebecca?”
He ran his hand through his hair again. “It is. I didn’t expect it to go anywhere, but she’s crazy about me for some reason.”
“So that’s why you want a divorce, to be with a twenty-two-year-old receptionist?” Claire felt an intense rush of pain at the betrayal. “How long has this been going on?”
“Only for about six months or so. I thought it would be a quick fling. I know that’s horrible of me, but I didn’t intend for it to turn into anything serious.”
“But it has?” Obviously.
He nodded. “Yes, and we just found out a week ago that she’s pregnant.”
Claire felt unsteady and grabbed hold of a chair by the island and sat. Ellis sounded excited about Rebecca’s pregnancy. A wave of intense sadness rushed over her, followed by anger.
“What do you want me to say to that? ‘Congratulations’?”
He flinched at her bitter tone. “No, and I’m sorry. I know it’s really shitty of me. But you have to admit, things haven’t been good with us for a long time.”
She nodded. “Yes, that’s true. Especially these last six months while you’ve been sleeping with your receptionist.” She narrowed her eyes. “Was there anyone before her?”
“No, of course not.” Ellis couldn’t look at her though, and she knew it was likely that Rebecca wasn’t the first fling he’d had in recent years. She felt stupid that she’d never suspected a thing.
“Well, I have some news to share too. Remember our fun night about a month ago, when we went to that cozy Italian restaurant?” She paused, and Ellis nodded, waiting for her to continue. “Rebecca’s not the only one who’s pregnant. I took a test right before the party.”
Ellis’s jaw dropped. “Seriously?” He ran his hand through his hair and started pacing again. After a long, uncomfortable moment of silence, he stopped and faced her. “Okay, let’s try to work this out. I want to be there for you and our baby.”
Claire shot him a withering glance. “And what about Rebecca?”
“I’ll figure something out. I’m so sorry, Claire.” He did seem sorry, but it was far too late for that.
“If you think I’d give you another chance after this, you’re crazy. Go be with Rebecca. And you can clean up this mess too. I’m going to the Four Seasons.”
She’d stormed out of the room then, quickly packed an overnight bag, called the hotel to make a reservation, and then called an Uber.
Forty-five minutes later, she was in a hot bath and on the phone with her mother first, and then Rachel.
Both of them had told her to come home to Nantucket.
She’d spent the next week packing, and she’d told Ellis to spend the week elsewhere.
She’d broken the news to Lily the next day, and she was devastated.
She was also torn whether to stay and finish out the school year or go with Claire to Nantucket and start at a new school.
“How’s Lily doing?” Rachel asked.
“She’s having a hard time with it. She’s not speaking to Ellis.”
“Good. I bet he hates that.”
Ellis adored Lily, and he hated when anyone was mad at him. Claire knew it was probably difficult for both of them right now. “I told her she’s welcome to come here at any time and go to Nantucket High School.”
“That’s a big change.”
Claire’s eyes welled up again. “I know. I wanted her to have the choice to finish out the year. I’d love to have her here. I just couldn’t stay there.”
“No. Of course not,” Rachel reassured her and then changed the subject. “So did you bring everything? All your fancy clothes, shoes, and purses?”
Claire grinned. “Yes. I shipped it all here and spent most of yesterday unpacking the boxes and storing everything in one of the spare bedrooms. Not that I’ll need most of it anymore.” Life on Nantucket was more casual.
“There are still events here. Charity things at the country club and all those festivals—the film and wine festivals are coming up in May and June.”
“That’s true. Do you still belong to the country club?” Nantucket had several really nice country clubs.
Rachel nodded. “Yes, Jared has gotten into golf. He plays in a men’s league. He finally convinced me to join the ladies’ league, and it’s actually fun. You’ll have to come and play with us sometime. Or at least come to an event.”
“Sure, that sounds fun.” Claire’s stomach flipped. The nausea attacks caught her by surprise. They were not limited to morning. She reached for a tortilla chip, and after a few minutes, the feeling passed. The thought of golfing was not appealing in the slightest.
“Oh, and I thought you might like to join my book club. We meet the third Wednesday of every month. We’re reading a classic, Daphne du Maurier’s Rebecca. Have you read it?”
Claire cringed at the name. “No, I haven’t. I’ve always meant to. I’d love to join you. I’ll head to Mitchell’s Book Corner tomorrow and pick up a copy. That will give me something to focus on.” She smiled. “I’ll have plenty of time to read.”
“Good. Did you and Ellis talk at all about your settlement? Will you be okay, money-wise?” Rachel asked.
“We didn’t talk about it, but I would assume it will be fine and fair. I didn’t want to go there yet. I did call a lawyer though, here on the island. It’s someone my mother knows. Sloane is supposedly a shark. We’re meeting next week.”
Rachel nodded. “Okay. I’ve heard Sloane is good too.”
Claire grinned. “I also cleaned out our home safe and took all the cash that was there. It was only a thousand dollars, but it felt good to stuff it into my purse.”
Rachel laughed. “You still have all your credit cards too?”
“I do. I was thinking I might want to find a job of some sort. It will be nice to earn a little money. I haven’t worked in years though. I always kept busy in the city, but here it feels like I will have a lot of time to fill.”
“Well, you could always sell some of your designer stuff if you need money fast,” Rachel joked.
“I could,” Claire agreed. “Hopefully I’ll never have to do that. I’m sure I’ll get a fair settlement from Ellis—alimony and child support.”
They spent the rest of the evening eating her mother’s delicious turkey tacos and chatting about everything under the sun.
There was never a shortage of conversation when she and Rachel got together.
By the time she left, a little before nine, Claire was happily exhausted, and while still somewhat in shock about the turn her life had taken, she felt a sense of calm and peace to be home on Nantucket.