Chapter 10
Chapter
Ten
I was clumsy at first, trying to handle the two guns and the rough terrain, but I started getting accustomed to things by the time Retta was out of sight around a boulder lit by neon fluorescent. I shot a spinning disk, then leapt on a rock and twisted around to shoot the small target that had dropped down, barely larger than a spider, before it disappeared back into the shadows. I landed and followed the trail down through the close rocks on either side. The right side opened up, and I shot through the gaps in the stone as I jogged. I wasted a bullet and bit my bottom lip, because there were only enough bullets if you were careful. I’d counted twenty-six targets on Max’s video, and I only had thirty-two paint balls if my quick approximation was correct.
I reached the edge of the cliff and leapt for the vine, hoping they had some net underneath me in case I missed. I didn’t have time to look down, just caught the rope and swung, taking a second to shoot one sphere at two o’clock, and one at seven, then let go of the rope and landed in a roll. Retta wasn’t anywhere in sight. She’d probably make double my time, but this was actually really enjoyable, running, shooting, leaping around like I’d done back when I was in gymnastics. I’d enjoyed acrobatics so much, but I had other priorities. Now I made my own priorities.
A paint bullet whizzed past my nose, and I automatically ducked. Retta was shooting at me? No, or she would have hit. She was distracting me. She’d also decided to play with me instead of winning, using her obvious advantages. Did I run faster or stalk her back? She was a goblin who could see in the dark, and there were plenty of shadowy places in the cavern that weren’t lit up with the fluorescent paint. What were my advantages? I had armored clothing, immortality, and a strong desire to get my hands on Mercury’s necromancer portrait. Was that enough to win? Only if I played smart. Smarter than a goblin, and everyone knew how clever they were. I was only an eighth goblin, who knows how much demon, and the rest beautiful, flawed humanity. Unless I wasn’t.
There was no way I could hunt her down. That meant that I’d have to let her catch me. But not until I was closer to the finish line. I started sprinting, leaping up to spin and shoot three targets, ignoring her flying missiles, because if she actually shot me, she’d already lost. So I’d make it hard for her to be precise, to miss.
I sprinted forward and then jerked back. I heard her cursing as she shot the rock behind me in a messy splatter. I continued running, making sure to hit every single measly target, including the tiny one inside a rock that you couldn’t see, but he’d shown it on the video demo, so I’d assume something was in there.
I was almost to the end of the course when Retta came from nowhere, hitting me on my back and knocking me rolling off the path and into nothing. I still managed to shoot the target on the way down, and then the one on the opposite side of the ravine that I was supposed to cross using the bridge.
There was no net.
I hit the water with my back, hands still raised to shoot. I kicked up hard enough to keep the guns out of the water. Not my head. I came up sputtering, blowing out water while I blinked and tried to reorient myself with the river pulling me downstream.
I couldn’t afford to lose more time. Holding my guns high in one hand, I swam with my other arm and my legs. Armored clothing was heavy, but the river wasn’t wide. Soon I was throwing my guns up on the bank and scrambling after them. I holstered them on my back while I caught my breath, shivering and heart racing from the shock of the icy cold underground river. I took one steadying breath before I grabbed onto my first handhold on the rock wall. They were slightly illuminated with the purple fluorescent. Otherwise, I’d be sunk. Maybe I’d throw myself in the river and see if I came out in a sewer. Shudder. It hadn’t been long enough to think that was a funny joke. No, I seriously hated cold, dark water.
Visibility wasn’t good down there. That was an understatement. Still, I was on the side of the river I wanted to be on.
I was pretty sure Retta attacking me like that hadn’t been on the list of acceptable activities, but only shooting was specifically against the rules. I really, really wanted to shoot Retta. Was she trying to kill me? I could have drowned if I’d hit my head on a rock and lost consciousness, but she was treating me like…Did Goblins try to kill each other for fun? It would be so much fun to kill her.
I wasn’t usually resentful or angry, but hearing I was demonic snapped something. Or maybe it was my mother refusing to believe me when I was standing right in front of her. Or maybe it was thinking about Retta having that shirtless picture of Mercury tucked inside her armored vest. Did he give it to her?
I snarled and climbed faster, digging in like I was a goblin, ignoring my bleeding fingers and knee that had hit hard coming down and was starting to throb. It was fine. If I could regrow a nose and some fingers, I’d definitely be able to shake off some small injuries. My knee really hurt, though. I could feel it swelling, getting red and tight.
Finally, I reached the top and rolled onto the path, shot the target floating over the river and the one behind me. I’d missed two near the bridge, but I might be able to get them further along the path where it was higher and overlooked the river again. I broke into a jog, ignoring my knee, although it almost gave out a few times. Why wasn’t I regenerating more quickly?
I forced myself on, but I started limping badly, and you can’t run well with a limp. I hesitated at a part where I had to climb up through a narrow passage. Could I get up that without a fully functioning knee? Not likely. Then again, I was almost to the finish line. Just to the top of this crag, ride a zip line across another ravine, and then if I could make the landing without plummeting to my death, I’d be there.
Retta was still somewhere, probably waiting for me near the zip line, because if she could mess up that ride, I’d be done. I had to be so careful. I wasn’t going to win, but I needed to make it with as many targets as possible, and to make it on my own two feet instead of having Max come rescue me.
I might not be Cassandra Clarence who could wave her hand and have the world at her feet, but I could finish this race, so I would. Carefully, painstakingly, I pulled myself up the last ten feet, through a narrow chimney that required bracing on both sides until I levered myself to the top and then rolled out onto the last landing. I lay on my back, breathing hard, then looked up over my shoulder and shot those two targets I’d missed earlier. That was good then. But if I fell over backwards right this second, I’d fall into the river again.
I shuddered and rolled forward, into a crouch, then started moving, using my hands in a crouch-crawl to keep my knee from taking too much weight. I had to stand to get another target. From that position, I could see the other side, the zipline platform and the deep drop into darkness beyond.
I looked around, even though there was no point. Was she gone already, or had she stuck around to witness my slowness, or to make me fail again? She hadn’t shot any more paintballs at me, but the hair on the back of my neck stood straight up. I felt like I had a target painted on my back. Good thing my shirt was armored.
I slowly made my way around the outcropping and finally reached the zipline platform. I looked around carefully, but there was no sign of Retta, and that area was lit well enough that I should have seen her if she was close enough to mess up this route. I checked the wires, checked the pulley system, but everything seemed to be in order. The finish line was right there, on the edge of the ledge in purple fluorescent, just waiting for me, and then I could go home with Bones, ice my knee, and watch tv until my eyes fell out of my sockets.
There were two targets in the ravine between the platform and the ledge, but I’d be holding onto two handles while I was supposed to shoot them. I’d have to hook my knee over one handle if I was going to shoot stuff, which meant I’d be hanging upside down.
It would be fine. If I died, I’d come right back. I took a deep breath, grabbed the handles, looped my good knee over one side, and then kicked off. That’s when I discovered that Retta had greased those handlebars like the oily goblin she was. I thought I’d checked them, but not well enough. I struggled to keep my grasp on the bar, but when I twisted to aim at the first target, my balance shifted too much, and my hand slid right off the handle, leaving me falling sideways.
I twisted midair, shot the other target, and then fell.
“NO!” I screamed until I hit a net, bouncing five times while Retta’s laughter echoed from above me.
I could barely make out the silhouette of her head high up there, where I should be right this second, instead of at the bottom of another pit. At least the net was better than the icy river. Still, I should have realized that the bars were greased. What was wrong with me?
“Good game,” Retta called with a friendly nod. “I’ll tell Max to get a harness and pull you out.”
I snarled and rolled until the net ended and I fell, landing on more solid rock. Ow. I dragged myself upright and then made my way to the wall. Again.
“It’s not over,” I said as I dug my fingers into the stone’s cracks.
“It’s over. You played a good game, nothing to be ashamed of, but it’s definitely over. You can’t climb that wall. You’re an injured human. Wait for Max to get you. He’s a very attractive werewolf, and in the shape you’re in, he’ll let you flirt with him. I’d make the most of it, if I were you.”
I blocked her out and focused on the climb. This cliff didn’t have handy neon lights to illuminate the most likely holds, but that was okay because there was a long crack that ran up most of the face, so I just jammed my swollen fingers into it and hauled myself up. I was a demonic goblin. I could do this.
“She’s climbing,” she said, sounding bemused. “She might not know when to quit.”
And she didn’t know when to shut up. I grimaced as I scraped my face on a jagged bit I hadn’t seen. Because I couldn’t see in the dark, and now with blood running into my eyes from my forehead, I could see even less.
“If you fall, make sure to throw yourself backwards so you land on the net. Otherwise…”
“So helpful,” I gritted, lunging up again and pulling myself up. The crack widened, and I was actually able to get some grip while I scrabbled with my feet for purchase. I made better time until the crack opened up and I was able to get my whole body in, leaning my back against one side while I braced myself with my feet. I was running on pure adrenaline and anger, because if I made it to the top, I wouldn’t really lose.
I smiled grimly and pushed myself back up, holding my guns across my lap while I maneuvered so they wouldn’t catch on anything I couldn’t see. Finally, I ran out of stone and pushed myself off the right side and pulled myself over an outcropping and tumbled gracefully to the platform where Retta was standing, illuminated by a small line of purple lights, so she looked particularly grotesque.
“You lost, but don’t feel bad about it. You’ve got spunk.”
I grinned at her, tasting blood in my mouth from my cut lip. “I’ve also still got some bullets.” I opened it up, shooting her point blank, mostly her face, but I targeted her bare shoulders as well.
She screeched and bounced back, but that only made the target more interesting. When I ran out of paint balls, I rolled to my feet, knowing she’d attack me. I wasn’t wrong. Covered in paint, she went in low, and I sidestepped, throwing myself on her to knock her off balance and get a good hold.
Sissy was one of the best, and she’d taught me very well, until I could take even her on a good day. Retta was a goblin, and wearing armor, but so was I, and joints were joints. Even goblin elbows were delicate.
She rolled me, pulling my arm back like she’d dislocate it. I broke her nose with my other elbow, slamming it across her face so hard that my own bone cracked at the impact. Bone against bone, she was tougher. But I’d be fine, eventually.
She levered my arm back, and I screamed, then gnashed my teeth at her paint-splattered face so she had to pull back. “Your teeth are too dull to challenge me,” she said, then chopped a few times with her serrated teeth, barely nicking my nose. “You shot me in the face, so I should bite a few chunks out of you so you’re not so pretty.”
I scoffed. “Goblin teeth marks could only be an improvement.” I shifted, trying to shake her off, but she squeezed tighter.
“You think Goblin bites are pretty or you think you’re already hideous?” She stared at me curiously, then moved so she could fish her phone out of her pocket, pinning me to the rock and rubbing my cut cheek on the stone in the process.
“Look,” she said, playing an old video of a cabaret dancer. I froze for a second at the absolute weirdness of this situation.
“What are you doing?”
“She looks just like you. One of the most famous dancers of all time. She was pursued by vampires, werewolves, goblins, you name it. You could be her except for the white bald thing you’ve got going.”
I squinted at the screen. “She’s not beautiful.”
“Maybe according to boring human standards, but there isn’t only one kind of beautiful. Also, I’m pretty sure she was pursued by plenty of humans. She was incredibly popular. Went to Paris, and I think got killed while being fought over. So, not bright, but definitely pretty.”
I blinked and then shoved her off me, having gotten my shoulder free while she was distracted trying to prove that I wasn’t hideous. “Wow. Thanks for the pep talk. Is that what it was? I don’t know. Weird is what it was. Don’t show people cabaret dancers while they’re trying to dislocate your elbows. It’s just distracting.”
She cocked her head and grinned. “Sure. You weren’t supposed to shoot me during the game.”
“I didn’t. I shot you after you’d already won. So I was disqualified after I already lost. Does that revoke my defeat?”
She reached out and made a grabby hand motion. “No. Give me the body armor before I throw you off the cliff. There’s a net, but you’d probably be stupid enough to climb up again.”
I sighed and started undoing the vest. I was wearing the opposite set from before, holograph bra, and black velvet bottoms. Pity I hadn’t found the matching pieces earlier. Oh well. Nothing here to see. Except that dancer…
I shook my head and tossed the armored vest at her. “It wasn’t sportsmanlike for you to take me out like that.”
She grinned. “It wasn’t against the rules.”
“No? Good to know that you have a broad scope when it comes to morality.” I threw her pants at her and nodded. “That’s it then. Congratulations on your big win.”
She hesitated. “You did well, though. Don’t feel bad. For a human, you did very well.”
“There are some humans who can do much better than me, the ones who train for this kind of thing. I’m trained to sit behind a desk. I’d like to see you do that.”
She grinned and backed away, holding up her hands, which were holding my gear, leaving me mostly naked in the very chilly cave. “No, thanks. You did well. Particularly at the end fight. You need to bulk up and put on some muscle, but your technique is solid.” With those weird words, she turned and strode off.
I promptly sat down, leaning against the nearest rock, and tried to catch my breath. I also pulled the folded poster out from underneath my holograph bra strap where it had been nestled between my shoulder blades during my disrobing. I’d gotten it off her while she’d been distracted by dislocating my arm. I unfolded it and peered at the image of Mercury in the wan purple light. Yes, that was rain running down the massive muscles. His skin was so pale, like the moon, like the flesh of the corpses behind him, but so absolutely beautiful. Like snowy silk.
“Nova?” Mercury growled from the shadows then strode towards me, becoming more visible while I clutched the poster and tried to not feel guilty, like I’d taken advantage of his private moment raising the dead.
“Oh, hi. I was just…”
He scooped me up into his arms, propping me up against his chest while he cupped my face with one hand, peering into my eyes while my heart raced from a different kind of adrenaline. “Bones is worried that you’ll have amnesia,” he growled.
I swallowed as his low murmur rippled down my spine. “I did fall a few times, but there was a river and a net. My head is fine.”
“And that’s why you’re bleeding down your face.” He adjusted me, pulling a cloak around both of us so I was entirely covered and nestled against him. “I’m sorry for leaving you right after you discovered something so unpleasant from Anastasia. I should have stayed with you, but instead, I pursued a shadow that was so gifted, I was unable to capture him.”
“Shadows are notoriously difficult to catch,” I said, snuggling against him, sliding my hand up his chest and around his neck, not because he might drop me, no, those muscles wouldn’t drop anything, but because I wanted to feel his silky hair.
“He was so difficult that he gave himself away, so I know who he most likely is.”
“Really?”
“Really. It’s unfortunate, because he works for one of the worst people in the world, and I was led on in such a way as to suspect that I was being kept busy for some reason. May I ask who hurt you here?” he murmured.
“Mostly the cliff, but the goblin, Retta, greased the bars, so I guess she was partially responsible. Isn’t it unethical to grease your opponent’s bars in a race?”
“Absolutely unethical, but that’s goblins for you, particularly Retta.”
“You know her?”
“Oh, yes. She left my employ a few years ago to work for Mr. Good, who happens to be the one who owns the shadow I chased. What an interesting coincidence.”
I felt a wash of cold confusion sweep over me. “Retta works for Mr. Good, the international crime boss? But he’s in jail.” My mother had testified against him in a move that I still didn’t understand. Yes, it was good to ally yourself with the president and against his assassin, but was it personal? If that was the same shadow, he’d been tracking me for years.
Mr. Good? There was nothing good about that monster, although he was supposed to be as human as they came, at least when he started out.
“His organized crime is so very organized that it operates very well while he relaxes behind bars. I don’t suppose she told you what she wanted.”
“No, but…” I pulled the poster out from underneath his cape to show it to him. “She had this, used it to lure me into a hopeless competition. Think about it. We can make copies and sell them while you do live demonstrations. The profits are going to be astronomical.”
He glanced at the paper and then turned towards the exit with a slight smile on his stern mouth. “You stole from a goblin? How delightfully humiliating. She won’t be able to live that down. Goblins are notoriously sneaky.”
“Yep. I distracted her with my dislocated shoulder.”
“Yes…wait, what?”
I patted his cheek and then kissed the other one because he was close and I was his precious dead, so I could do that kind of thing, even if it made my heart beat unsteadily. “Nothing. I do feel much better now, emotionally, not physically.” Being in his arms helped me feel much better physically.
“Mrs. Clarence is impossible for anyone to crack. She’s a bit terrifying, to be honest. I’m sorry she upset you.”
I snuggled against his neck, inhaling the scent of him, spices and that delicious French aftershave. “I was very angry. No, probably sad, but it translated to anger. You know how that is.”
“I do. Miss Nova, if you’re sad, I will do whatever is necessary to make you happy. You don’t have to go running into a werewolf shooting gallery, or try to shake down the ice queen.”
How nice. We were just going to forget all about Mr. Good’s involvement in my life. He could tell I couldn’t take any more trauma today. “Would you raise an army of the dead for me?” I asked, nuzzling his silky throat.
His voice was a low rumble. “Of course. That’s too easy. I’d even listen to your sorrows and watch an odious tv show with you.”
I gasped and sat up. “You’d watch the show with me and Bones? Really?” I caught his cheek as I peered into his beautiful eyes, flickering madly with the sparks of anger he kept so firmly under control. He was not happy about being led like a fool by Mr. Good’s henchmen. Did Retta poison me? No, it was more like she was seeing how I reacted, like a test. Yes, she’d been testing me, or sent by Mr. Good to test me. But why? No good reason, that was certain.
“I would,” he said soberly.
I hesitated, needing some stability and independence in my life. “And would you also maybe consider giving me a job? With benefits? And a money transfer to a fake ID place?”
He smiled, and it was a dangerous smile. “Why Miss Nova, how good of you to ask.”
I frowned at him. “That sounds like the intro to a scam.”
“You’ve been around too many werewolves and goblins. I have a job for you, if you’ll take it.”
“This sounds like the second part of the scam, laying it on like jam. A jam scam.”
He held me close and walked softly through the cave tunnel, like he knew where he was going. “You can teach Bones how to make jam, but for the next few days, I want you to focus your abilities on a different project.”
“I knew it.” I sighed heavily. “You’re not really giving me benefits, are you?”
“On the contrary, Miss Nova, I have a contract waiting for you at the auction house. But that’s for tomorrow. Today, we are going home, watching an odious show while we sit on the couch, and eat ice cream. That is, if we don’t use it all on your knee. I got Neapolitan, since I don’t know which flavor you favor.”
I sighed happily. “You have a contract for me? And ice cream? You really are the best master in the world.”
“You are not dead, Miss Nova. I am only the master of the dead.”
“That’s only because you refuse to take off your shirt around any goblins. You could command the masses. Think of the goblin army you could raise.”
He made a choking sound. “Thank you for the suggestion, but I think I’ll pass. Did you actually go up against Retta in a contest you knew you’d lose for a chance to steal a poster?”
“Of course. Oh! She asked for the armor, but it was hers in the first place.” And she’d gotten the poster from him, but probably not ethically, so I was even more justified in stealing it back. I did feel slightly guilty about it, but the prize was worth the guilt.
“Not hers. It went with the job, so when she left, the armor stayed with me.”
“Hm. That sounds a little petty, Mercury.”
“I am slightly petty when my employees, who I have spent large sums of money on armoring, leave me for a competitor who wants all my secrets.”
“Ah. Corporate pettiness. That’s fine then.” A wave of exhaustion swept over me. I snuggled into him and relaxed, letting him carry me and my aching knee home.