Chapter Forty-Eight
Kayden
Olivia was pretty shaken up about the situation with Martin, especially after Jace told us everything about his threats and attempt to discredit us both.
After Jace reassured her multiple times that Sutton wasn’t upset and they were handling it, she finally dropped it, willing to place her confidence in Sutton’s legendary lawyering skills.
I’d ended up working in the conference room at Jace’s office while he handled a few other things so we could all go together to visit my father after lunch.
I’d suggested putting it off for a few days after the morning we’d had but Jace wasn’t even willing to consider it.
Typical Jace, always putting everyone else first. Truthfully, I needed this visit to release myself from my father in more ways than one.
Just being in Boston again had compelled me to visit him, but after watching him pass out after the Thanksgiving dinner I’d ordered for us without so much as a thank you, I’d realized I was only hurting myself by continuing to try.
Today, I was going to tell him my truth and officially cut ties with him.
It was the best thing for me and my happiness.
I stared at the door to my father’s condo, the one I’d only seen a handful of times since I left for college, and took a deep breath. As if Jace could tell my heart rate was picking up, he grabbed my hand and squeezed gently.
Something about this place made me claustrophobic and I was grateful I’d gone to a meeting earlier.
I rarely went to AA meetings, especially after the first year of my sobriety, but when something really triggering happened—or in this case, was about to happen—they were a good support and reminder to stay the course.
Nothing good would come from having a drink to get through this.
In fact, alcohol was a big factor in what had gotten us to this moment to begin with.
“Fuck him,” I said, as Olivia took my other hand. “Right?”
Jace kissed my cheek. “Yeah, baby, fuck him.”
I dropped their hands and knocked on the door before pushing it open.
“Dad?” I called as we entered.
“Kayden? Is that you?” Dad called back, words slurring. Not even his severely damaged liver was enough to get him to put down the beer. Sure enough, when we entered the living room a moment later, he had a beer in his hand.
“Hi,” I said.
“What are you doing here?” he asked, looking first at me and then the two people by my side. “Seen more of you in the last few months than in the last decade, boy.”
“Yeah, about that. I shouldn’t have come before,” I said. “You may not punch me anymore, but you still hurt me every time I see you, and I’m done being hurt by you.”
He raised an eyebrow and took a swig of beer. “Then what the fuck are you doing here now?”
“I have a few things to say before you die,” I said.
I took a deep breath through my nose. You can do this, Kayden.
It’s been a long time coming. I’d spent years in therapy going over what I’d tell my dad someday if I ever decided to come out to him.
This wasn’t exactly how I’d envisioned the moment, but I’d had my opening line decided for years.
“First of all, you’re an asshole,” I said.
Jace snorted and leaned closer as he whispered, “You probably should have warned us you were taking this path, but we’ve got you.”
I fought a smile at his reaction.
Dad laughed, like this was all a joke. “You came all the way over here to tell me I’m an asshole? You’ve said that before, Kayden. You could have saved yourself a trip since I know how you feel about me. Your ten-year absence made that pretty clear.”
“Well, that absence was well-deserved, and this is the last time I’m going to say it,” I said, taking a step closer. I gestured to Jace. “This is my boyfriend, Jace.”
Dad scoffed. “The fuck it is. I told you plenty of times, boy, I didn’t raise you to be gay.”
Jace stiffened and stepped forward, his intent to respond to the venom in my father’s voice obvious. I held an arm out in front of him.
“No,” I said. “You raised me to be ashamed of who I was. It took years of therapy and meeting the right people to erase all the bullshit you put in my head.”
“Therapy’s a bunch of garbage. Obviously, or they would have done something about you being gay,” Dad grumbled, ignoring me and focusing on one word in my response as usual.
“I’m not gay. I’m bisexual.”
“If you’re fucking men, you sound pretty gay to me,” Dad growled and gulped his beer. He held it out to me. “You want some? Or you still doing that AA bullshit?”
“You mean the bullshit that keeps me from turning out like you? Alone? Drunk? Angry? Yeah, I’m still doing that bullshit, Dad.
” I fought the urge to crinkle my nose in disgust. The more space I put between us over the years the less angry I became with him and the more I just felt disgusted by how he’d turned out.
He’d lost his child and his wife, and while anyone might be broken by that, he’d spent years choosing to reject the only family he had left in favor of that bottle right there.
Dad turned his attention on Jace, his face distorting into a snarl. “So, you’re a fucking f—”
“Do not finish that sentence,” Jace said in the deepest, most authoritative voice I’d ever heard.
Olivia gasped and looked on in horror as Jace drew himself up to his full height, looking rather menacing as he stepped toward my father.
“I’m the man who’s going to spend the rest of my life taking care of your son because I love him.
If you ever start to use that word in front of us again, I’ll knock your fucking teeth out. ”
Wow, his protectiveness is a huge turn-on.
I threaded my fingers through Jace’s, and my father stepped toward us, his hand raised. Jace must have seen it coming because he stepped in front me and took the hit to the face that my father had obviously intended for me.
Olivia gasped again and a quick glance at her told me that she was far more horrified than I’d expected. Maybe she really hadn’t understood how terrible this interaction would be or maybe it was just too much after Jace’s encounter with Martin this morning.
Frankly, he’s using fewer slurs than I expected.
Jace turned to face me, blocking me from my father. “Are we done here?”
I ran a hand over Jace’s reddening cheek. “Almost, babe.” Jace took a deep breath and stepped to the side again, allowing me to face my father.
“One more thing, Dad. I want to make sure you meet my girlfriend, Olivia,” I said, putting my arm around her and pulling her toward me. I pressed my lips to the side of her head and let them linger there, hoping to offer her some comfort in the moment. “Jace and I are very happy with her.”
“What the fuck is this?” my father snarled, taking a sloppy swig of his beer. “Which one of you messed up my son even worse than he already was?”
“This is called a throuple—at least, that’s what we choose to call ourselves. We’re in a committed polyamorous relationship and we’re raising our daughter together,” I said.
Olivia scowled at him. “Your son isn’t even remotely messed up, which speaks to his character more than anything now that I see how he was raised.”
Dad’s eyes flared with anger.
“I’m glad I moved back to Boston,” I said.
“I found a family. That’s not you, Dad. That’s never been you.
I hope when you’re alone, taking your final breaths, that you look back on how you treated me, and you finally feel remorse.
Because I won’t be thinking about you at all when I die and I sure as hell will never be like you with my children.
We could have been stronger together after they died, Dad.
It didn’t have to be like this. We didn’t have to lose each other when we lost them, but you made that choice for us when you decided to start drinking and hitting me to deal with your anger. ”
Dad looked stricken, and for a brief moment I wondered if the man I knew before my mother died was in there, but even if he was, it was far too late for us. I turned to leave, and my partners followed me.
“You’re all bad enough but you’re going to fuck up kids too? When the fuck did you have a kid?” he yelled after us.
Olivia paled, and it wasn’t lost on me how much he’d just struck a chord with her. It was for Olivia that I even bothered to address him again.
I turned to face him for the last time. “There is nothing fucked up about us. My daughter will grow up with parents who love each other, love her, and never raise a hand to her. That’s a hell of a lot more than you can say for your parenting, isn’t it, Dad?
” I spat the name he hadn’t deserved since the day my mother died.
He stared at me for a moment before Jace grabbed my wrist and tugged me toward him.
I let myself turn toward him, and together, the three of us walked out the door.
One day, Kaylee might decide to call me Dad, and if she did, I’d cherish it for the gift it was.
It was a title I’d work every day to earn and remain worthy of.