Chapter 3
Chapter
Three
Dhara
My head throbbed as I walked into South Lake Diner. Thanks to a late night of getting my room back into livable condition and the few slaps Mom had gotten in last night, I was aching, to say the least.
I couldn’t keep going like this, but there was no alternative at the moment.
This was my life for now. Even my omega instincts and heats had been stunted in the past few years thanks to all the stress. Something that definitely didn’t help matters.
“Grab your usual booth,” I told Gavin.
They gave me one free meal here and had thankfully agreed to let me feed Gavin breakfast here every morning, instead. He sat there quietly and did what was left of his homework or gamed a bit on the used console I’d managed to get him for Christmas last year.
“Hey there, hockey boy!” Lydia said as she walked around the counter with a tray loaded down with coffees and stacks of pancakes.
“Hey, Lydia,” he called out, not even looking up as she started distributing the food to the table next to his.
Lydia was my favorite person to work with. She had the kind of personality that put anyone at ease. She was chatty and brought me out of my shell quickly.
It was hard not to be in a good mood when she was around. That was something I desperately needed in my life.
She and her pack owned the diner. One of the alphas, Chance, owned the place through his family. She ran the tables in the morning and kept them in line while they cooked in the back.
There were other workers, too, so they didn’t have to work around the clock, but they were really the face of South Lake Diner.
After she dropped off the food, she moved over to Gavin. “The usual?”
Gavin looked affronted at her suggestion. “No, it’s hockey season, Lydia. I need the protein. I’ll do the meat omelet and some sourdough.”
“Ahh, understood,” she hummed, writing his order down on the ticket.
She bit back her laughter and tossed me a wink as she walked around the counter and slapped the ticket down for her alpha, Max, who just gave her a look and a smirk before getting back to work.
They were so cute it was disgusting.
“What about you? Did you eat this morning?” she asked as her far too observant gaze found me.
“Yeah,” I lied easily. “Just Gavin needs food.”
It was the same song and dance I did every morning. A lie that I could barely sell anymore.
I ate between shifts, and that was about the only time I managed throughout the day, which was fine. The suppressants had started stealing my appetite weeks ago.
My doctor warned me that I was on my last legs of being able to use them. Then I’d have to take a break for a couple weeks before getting back on them, another thing that, apparently, wasn’t sustainable, either.
What the hell else could I do?
If I left Gavin for that long…
I shuddered at the thought, my stomach turning again as I pushed it away. Nope. Not happening.
Headaches weren’t the only side effects, but I was pushing through everything else.
It wasn’t ideal, but it was at least manageable. For now.
I fell into an easy groove of taking orders, smiling at customers, and cracking jokes that I didn’t quite feel.
“There’s my future wife!” Frankie, one of our older alpha regulars called out, giving me a flirty wink.
“Leave her alone, Frankie!” Gavin yelled from his seat in the back.
The old man cackled. He loved to tease us both. I shook my head as I walked up.
“You better watch it. One of these days he’s going to turn into a tough, little alpha or delta.”
There was no way in hell my brother was going to end up a beta. His strength alone, even at his age, was noticeable. It was one of the reasons he was able to move around on the ice so well and keep up with the older kids.
“He knows I’m just teasing you. My heart only belongs to my Gloria. May she rest in peace,” he said, putting a hand over his heart and looking genuinely grief-stricken for a moment before he shook it off. A second later that smart-ass smile I knew too well was back on his face.
Frankie was harmless, and honestly, I liked that he teased me. It made my mornings go a little bit faster.
“What can I get you today, Frankie?” I asked.
I’d already poured his coffee the moment I saw him walking in.
He took a sip of the black liquid, letting out a sigh as he put it back on the table.
“I think I’ll take the chocolate chip pancakes today. My diabetes be damned. What’s the point of living if you can’t enjoy it once in a while, right?”
“Exactly,” I agreed, writing it down before heading back to Max.
“Order in, Max,” I said as I slid the ticket across.
“Got it, Blondie. Thanks,” he said, tacking it up above his cooktop, reading the order, and then getting to work. His two packmates jumped in next to him, reading it before delegating swiftly.
They were a well-oiled machine. I couldn’t help but admire them. Their relationship always seemed so effortless.
I knew no relationship was without its hurdles. That was the point. They didn’t let anything bring them down, they simply worked together.
They made having a pack seem so nice. People that would always have your back. They’d be there for you when life got too hard to handle alone.
God, I wanted it so fucking bad.
My mind drifted to Conrad.
That was the fucked-up part. I knew I could have it if I wanted. He made it clear that he was only stepping back because of me.
If only he knew why.
I had a feeling he’d have no respect for me because what respectable person let somebody beat them down every day and just accepted it?
What omega didn’t stand up for herself?
The self-loathing was so strong that my stomach turned again.
I really had to get it together if I wanted to make it through this day. I had another cleaning shift tonight before finally getting a few evenings off thanks to a series of away games.
“Oooh, Dhara. There are two hunky men walking in. I think that should be your table,” Lydia said as she walked by, slapping two menus and two sets of silverware against my chest before walking away with a grin.
She promptly plopped her ass in the seat across from Gavin, who was already diving into his food.
I looked around to see the guys she was talking about.
The world came to a halt at the sight of Conrad settling into a booth.
He hadn’t seen me yet. He was too busy talking to another person.
A delta, by the looks of him.
His hair was long and shaggy. It would probably look messy on anyone else, but it suited him. It was dyed a deep burgundy red, spiking up in a way that only gel could accomplish.
I looked at Lydia for help but she was ignoring me.
Fuck, I had to face this.
Bracing myself, I hurried over, not wanting to make them wait.
“Welcome to South Lake Diner. Can I get you guys something to drink?”
“Oh my god, Dhara!” Conrad said. His entire face lit up like he was genuinely so excited to see me. I swear it only made the pit that was forming in the middle of my stomach worse.
“Hey, Conrad. Nice to see you.”
“This is another one of my new teammates, Lachlan,” he said, gesturing to the delta across from him. “He just transferred in from North Crossing.”
“Nice to meet you,” I said easily, giving him the same practiced smile I’d used all morning.
Lachlan held out his hand to shake mine. It was so formal that I let out a small laugh as I placed my palm in his.
Only, he surprised me by twisting my hand slightly and placing a kiss on the top of it.
“I promise the pleasure is all mine,” he flirted, giving me a smirk that had my cheeks flaming red.
Conrad groaned. “Can you not? I’d hate to have to kill my new roommate this early on.”
I started to pull my hand away, not wanting to goad the alpha.
Then the delta’s scent hit me. Pine resin, blackberry, and fresh rain. It was deep and tart, the slight delta sharpness buzzing through it and tickling my nose as I breathed him in.
The deep, rich scent twisted with Conrad’s coconut, ocean air, and vanilla scent. They were complete opposites scent-wise. Yet it worked. Both scents were multifaceted and equally tempting.
Fuck, this was so much harder than I ever thought it could get.
Lachlan froze as he breathed in again, coming to the same realization I just had.
“Holy shit,” he gasped. “We’re scent-matches.”
“Wait, what?” He had Conrad’s attention now.
“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with me,” Lachlan protested, looking genuinely offended.
“She’s my scent-match,” Conrad said. His voice held a possessive edge that had my omega perking up despite my best efforts.
“Can I get you guys a drink?” I asked frantically, not willing to have this conversation with all these gossiping people around me.
If my mom found out about this, it’d be the end of everything. She wouldn’t allow me to be happy and would be even worse to ensure it didn’t happen.
“Yeah, I’ll take a coffee with cream and sugar,” Lachlan managed, still looking startled.
“Water for me,” Conrad added.
I nodded once before rushing off, not trying to be rude, but I was freaking the fuck out and desperate to keep it under wraps.
Lydia followed me. “Tell me I didn’t hear what I think I heard.”
“I fucking hope not, Lydia,” I choked out, fighting off tears. “If my mom hears about this, she’s going to make our life hell.”
I never told her about the worst that Mom put us through, but she knew she was a narcissist and that I stuck around for Gavin’s sake.
She looked over before trying to reassure me. “No worries there, Dhara. There’s construction workers on one side of them and a bunch of kids on the other. You’re safe.”
“Thank God,” I breathed out, practically deflating. “I need to set some rules with these guys. Talking about that shit at work can never happen again.”
“But you have scent-matches, Dhara! This is amazing!” Lydia said, her hand on my arm now, eyes so wide and hopeful for me, like this could be the thing that changed my life.
I shook my head quickly, refusing to let that hope hit me. I couldn’t risk it. “It’s not like that for me. A pack isn’t in the cards for this omega, Lydia.”
“Bullshit. Fate gave them to you for a reason. Embrace that. Let them help you.”
My gaze hardened. “I’m not a charity case. I don’t need an alpha to rescue me.”
She let go of my arm and let her eyes close in frustration.
“Okay, it’s your call,” she said carefully. “Just know that life is never black and white. Find that gray area and embrace it. They seem like good men.”
“Look,” I said, my voice softening. “I appreciate you looking out for me, but this... it just can’t happen right now. I’m just going to get them their drinks and send them back to the hockey arena.”
I stepped away to gather the coffee and waters.
When I walked back out they had their heads together, stealing glances back at me and talking frantically. They pulled back as I walked up, offering me easy smiles as if this wasn’t awkward as hell.
“Here you go, boys. Did you have a chance to look at the menu?” I asked as I arranged their drinks and looked down at my order pad.
I could feel their gazes heavy on me, but I refused to look up. My pen was poised over the order pad, waiting.
“What’s going on, Dhara?” Conrad asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Not here.”
It was all I managed before plastering a smile on my face and looking up. I’d practiced this look well.
The one that hid away every real emotion that I might have.
Lachlan was staring at me with a guarded look on his face before giving his order in such a monotone voice that it broke my heart.
I knew I was hurting my mates by pushing them away like this. The worst part was, they hadn’t done a damn thing wrong.
This was all on me.
They were confused and upset, this was not the reaction anybody expected. But unfortunately, sometimes life was a bitch. I’d learned that more times than I could count.
“Will you be working tonight?” Conrad asked.
I nodded. “Gavin has juniors first, but yes.”
“Can we talk then?”
I studied him for a minute, not sure what I could say to fix this other than the fact that I couldn’t be with them.
“Maybe,” was all I gave him. “I’m going to put your order in. Let me know if you need anything else.”
Then I was off, giving Max the order and checking on my other tables.
I didn’t ignore the two scent-matches that watched my every move, but I also didn’t give them the extra attention they wanted.
My watch started to beep and I looked up to see Gavin already gathering his stuff.
“Give me five, Lydia,” I called out as I dropped off my tray to walk him out. She was already waving me off.
She knew the routine by now. We did this every weekday morning.
“You know, I can walk myself out there,” Gavin said as I made sure he had everything.
We started to walk toward the door until he froze. I stumbled to a halt but he was already talking excitedly.
“Hey, Conrad! Holy crap, you’re friends with Lachlan Evans?!”
“Hey, buddy. Yeah, he’s my new teammate and roommate,” Conrad said with a chuckle.
My watch beeped again and I gave them an apologetic smile. “Gavin, we have to go.”
“We’ll see you tonight at practice, buddy,” Conrad promised before I could usher my brother out. The way he talked to Gavin melted me a little more, even when I couldn’t allow it to truly take effect.
Because Gavin deserved people like them.
He deserved the whole world.
But I refused to risk losing him over my own selfish wants. Mom would do everything she could to ruin my life and make sure I didn’t see Gavin. Then he’d be at her mercy without me as a buffer.
A possibility I couldn’t consider for even a second.
If I had to break my own heart to give him the life he deserved, then that’s exactly what I would do.