Chapter 18
The music was so loud,I had a headache before I even stepped into the club. The barrage of smells made my stomach hurt, too.
I pasted a smile on my face, though, and followed my friends to the bar.
When Vi bought three rounds of overpriced drinks, I drank them like I wasn’t shrinking inside.
Like I wasn’t longing for the cabin I’d left behind.
Like I didn’t miss August so much it hurt.
It was ridiculous for me to feel so attached to him. I knew it was.
But that didn’t change the way I felt.
I’d spent one month with him… and that month had changed everything for me.
But I forced myself to dance.
To smile.
To laugh.
“You look good,” Randa teased me, swiveling her hips while some gorgeous stranger held her close. Her eyes were bright, and her face was flushed. And despite my own emotions, I was chest-achingly glad she was having fun.
“So do you,” I rolled my hips too, but halted when a pair of hands landed on my waist.
They were the wrong size.
Not big enough.
Nowhere near hot enough.
And the body that stepped up behind me definitely wasn’t the one I wanted there.
“Hey,” the guy called over my shoulder. “You want to dance?”
Randa gave me a thumbs-up as her date spun her away from me.
Vi was back at the bar, arguing with Eli about something. They always seemed ready to rip each other’s heads off.
I was on my own.
My stomach clenched at the idea of having my body pressed against someone other than August.
But before I could say no, the guy had already started moving my hips himself, grinding my ass against him.
The feeling was so wrong, my stomach literally flipped.
I ripped his hands off me and rushed across the room as my belly churned.
My knees hit the cold tile, and my chin hit the icy porcelain as everything in my stomach came back up.
I vomited again, and again. The feeling of nausea remained, as if every part of me was in denial that I no longer belonged to the blond dragon I wanted.
The one I was starting to think I loved.
A few tears leaked down my cheeks as I finally sat back on my heels.
What was I doing with myself?
I was in a nightclub when I wanted to be hiding away.
I was trying to have fun for my friends’ sake, when I needed to give myself time to grieve.
My shaking hand wiped across my clammy forehead.
I needed to go home.
Back to our cabin.
It would feel empty without August, but it was the closest I could get without having him there.
My body worked on auto-drive as I rinsed my face and cleaned my mouth. As I said goodbye to my friends, and asked Eli to take me back to the apartment.
As I packed up the small bag of my things.
As I drove back to the cabin, giving Eli one of the furnished guest rooms August and I hadn’t touched. I didn’t love having him in our space, and he smelled wrong, just like Brynn had, but the intensity of that seemed to have faded with heat’s end.
And as I collected all of the blankets and pillows that smelled like him, dragging them into my room and building a nest for myself.
When I fell asleep that night, I felt more at peace than I had since I woke up alone in our bed.
Vi and Randadrove over the next afternoon.
They were both hungover, and confused about why I’d left.
I made pancakes and smoothies for them while I explained.
“I know it’s weird, but I feel like this is where I belong.”
They exchanged looks that said they thought I was crazy.
I was crazy.
So, there was no way around that.
“Plus, he put it in my name. It’s paid off. I only have to pay for utilities,” I added.
They understood that one more.
Money was simpler than fate.
“Why did he do that?” Randa asked, her expression something between perplexed and suspicious.
“Because we were a team,” I said simply. “The bond didn’t seal, but that doesn’t erase the feelings we have for each other. When he’s back in town, he’ll come here.”
“Then why did he leave in the first place?”
That, I couldn’t explain to them.
“Dragon stuff. He would’ve stayed if he could,” I said.
It wasn’t really a lie.
“You know this is insane, right?” Vi asked. “Like, verifiably insane. Check you into a mental facility, insane.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’ve been living here for a month. Why is it insane that I feel comfortable here? Or that I have feelings for a guy who treated me really, really well?”
“Because you’re not mates. And to supernaturals, that means you’re absolutely nothing. Right?” Vi looked at Eli, who was on his phone at the table, sitting behind them.
“Hmm?” He lifted his gaze absentmindedly.
He was probably playing a game or something.
“How many supernaturals are romantic with people they’re not mated to?” she demanded.
“Oh. Uh, none. Not that I know of.” He looked down at his phone again.
I fought the urge to throw something at him.
Something hard.
Or a pancake, since that was nearby.
Yeah, dropping a syrupy pancake on his head would be extremely satisfying.
“So he’s not going to be with you,” Vi pointed out.
“Could the bond restart again, Eli?” Randa asked. “Since it didn’t seal last time?”
He looked up again, his forehead creasing for a moment. “I’m not sure.”
That made my chest hurt a little.
“I’m going to stay long enough to figure it out,” I told the girls. “If he wants to walk away from me, that’s fine. But if he doesn’t, I’m not leaving either.”
“Being the person who cares more never works out,” Vi warned.
“How do you know I’m the one who cares more?”
“August isn’t here. You are.”
“He would be here if he had the choice,” I said. It was what Eli had told me—and what I desperately hoped was true.
“Elodie is old enough to make her own decisions,” Randa said, reaching over to squeeze my hand. I gave her a small smile. “Let’s talk about something else. Like jobs. I got a job offer a few days ago.”
My eyes widened. “You did? And you didn’t tell me?!”
“You were sleeping off weeks of sex!”
“Valid point. Tell me everything,” I ordered.
She smiled, launching into the story about her interview and everything that had come after.
They stayedfor dinner before they finally headed home. Vi had work the next evening, and needed to run a few errands before she called it a night. Randa had to buy some things for her new job.
In the past, I would’ve probably gone with them.
In the present, I just wanted to curl up in my room, surrounded by August’s scent, and read a book or watch a movie.
I took a long shower after they were gone, then padded out to grab a snack. While I was in the kitchen, I heard Eli’s voice in the other room.
“How bad is he?”
How bad was who?
August?
I abandoned my snack idea and hurried across the house, stopping just outside Eli’s door.
There was a moment of pause before he responded to whoever was on the other line.
“How many days do they think it’ll take him to heal?”
My heart squeezed painfully.
Was August hurt?
“You need to get him out of there,” Eli finally said. “I know the thunder doesn’t want to let him go, but try to convince them.”
Another moment passed.
My heart pounded erratically.
Eli growled, “If it comes down to it, I’ll fly in there myself and convince him to abandon them. He’s better off banned from the mountains than dead in prison. I finally have Elodie convinced he’s coming back for her—I don’t want to have to break the news to her that he was fucking killed.”
I couldn’t hold myself back anymore.
Pushing the door open, I stepped into the room.
Eli grimaced when he saw me.
“What happened to him?” I barely recognized my own voice.
Eli didn’t answer right away.
I gave him a minute before crossing the room and taking the phone from him.
“Who is this?” Somehow, my voice didn’t shake.
“Jasper,” the one on the other line said. “I imagine this is Elodie?”
“Yes. Tell me what happened.”
There was a moment’s pause before Jasper spoke again. “August has been getting in fights. In the prison. He doesn’t start them, but he finishes them. He’s killed a dozen other prisoners already. The last guy to challenge him was a particularly nasty werewolf.”
“And?”
“And he’s in bad shape. In the infirmary. It’ll be a week or so before he’s fully healed.”
“A week? Don’t supernaturals heal fast?”
“Yes.”
So when Jasper said bad shape he meant on death’s door.
“What are the odds he won’t pull through?”
Jasper was silent for a moment. “Pretty low,” he finally said. “He’s got someone to fight for now.”
Me.
He was talking about me.
I squeezed my eyes shut. “He’s not going to survive six months in there, is he?”
“It’s possible, but not likely.”
“And he knew that, going in?”
“Dragons run the prison, El. Everyone inside hates us. On top of that, we have to be chained so we can’t shift, when we’re serving time.”
So August couldn’t defend himself in his dragon form, even though the other prisoners probably had access to their magic.
And they would all be targeting him.
That was why he knew he couldn’t let me go with him. Because it would be a miracle if he survived—but there wasn’t a chance I would.
“I need to see him,” I said.
“That’s not possible.”
“Then make it possible, Jasper. He shouldn’t be alone while he’s healing, and I’m his mate. Or sort of his mate. That means something, doesn’t it? Even if he doesn’t want me, I just spent heat with him. Maybe I can talk to the dragons and convince them to let him go earlier or something? Eli said they want to know how we made it through without sealing the bond. Can I bargain with that?”
The words were spewing from me, almost nonsensically. It didn’t matter whether or not I made sense. I just wanted to see August, to make sure he was okay.
We were a team, if nothing else.
I was going to believe that until he specifically said otherwise.
“If you can convince Eli to carry you to Mate Mountain, I’ll put you in front of the guys making decisions for the thunder. I can’t get you in on my own,” Jasper finally said.
“Thank you. I’ll figure it out.”
“Good luck.” He hung up the phone, and I handed it to Eli.
He was already shaking his head. “August will kill me.”
“Not if I’m standing between you two. Please, Eli? You’re the one who said he won’t survive on his own in there. I need to see him, to make sure he’s okay, and try to talk him into coming up with another plan.”
Eli sighed heavily.
“Please?” I clasped my fingers together.
“Fine.” He ran a hand through his hair. “If anyone asks, I’m telling them you held a knife to my balls.”
“Deal.” I didn’t bat an eye at the crude visual. “I’ll bring a chef’s knife, just to sell it.”
He sighed again, but waved me toward the kitchen.
A few minutes later, I was on his back, and we were on our way to Mate Mountain.
Flyingwith Eli wasn’t anywhere near as peaceful as flying with August.
For one, Eli smelled bad.
For another, he didn’t try to glide, or to make the ride steady. The bastard was all over the place. Up and down, zigzagging, side to side… he never flew smoothly for more than a few seconds.
It was unnerving.
I dropped my chef’s knife after one particularly sharp motion, and wrapped both my arms around his stinky, scaly neck.
The last thing I needed was to plunge to my death on my way to find August.
The sun had setand I was utterly exhausted, when we finally reached the mountain. It towered over all the others around it, and from the outside, looked pretty much like everything else.
Eli landed on a smooth, well-disguised stretch of stone, and I looked past him as he set me down on my feet.
My bare feet, I realized.
I hadn’t dressed for the part. Not that I knew what part to dress for when surrounded by dragons—but I was pretty sure spandex shorts and a big t-shirt tied at my hip weren’t it.
Oh well.
I could see fine in the dark thanks to August’s magic, so I didn’t have a problem looking curiously at the mountain.
It seemed surprisingly normal.
“This is Mate Mountain?” I asked Eli, as he shifted back while I was looking away from him.
“Yep.”
I heard fabric rustling.
Hopefully he was putting pants on. I’d noticed a stone basket of something off to the side of the platform, and it seemed reasonable to assume it had clothes in it.
“It’s technically called Main Mountain. The dragons live in the top half, and the prison is in the bottom. We corrected people at first, but realized that if they think the place we live is separate from the prison, both are safer,” Eli said. “And Mate Mountain is catchier.”
Huh.
That was kind of brilliant.
“Come on.” He waved me into an opening in the wall of the mountain, and I followed him inside.
The interior wasn’t lit. There were no lightbulbs, but they weren’t necessary with a dragon’s sight. My vision in the dark was fine, but the shifters’ was probably much better.
There was no decorative furniture, plants, or hanging art as we moved through large hallway after large hallway.
The space was cold and impersonal, but we kept walking.
“I’m taking you to one of the gathering rooms,” Eli said. “Jasper will already have the thunder together.”
That was good.
I didn’t want to wait. There was no point in waiting.
But, it was still going to be a little overwhelming to walk into a room full of dragon shifters who probably hated me just because of my connection to August.
I’d deal with it, though.
We walked for a few more minutes before we finally stepped into a large room. It had multiple openings in the walls, like windows, with a massive table in the middle and gigantic chairs surrounding it.
Most of the gigantic chairs were occupied by even-more-gigantic dragon shifters.
And those bastards looked angry.
Eli abandoned me in the doorway, crossing the room and taking a seat next to Jasper. The guys really did almost look like twins.
I forced a small smile onto my face and lifted a hand. “Hi.”
Silence all but echoed through the room.
None of them looked angrier after my greeting, at least.
Socializing had never been one of my strong suits. There was a reason I’d gotten my degree in computers, not psychology. Or marketing. Or anything that required working closely with people.
“My name is Elodie. As you know, August and I survived heat without sealing our bond.” My words came out awkwardly, but I went on anyway. “I know you put him in prison, and I know he’s going to die if you leave him there. I overheard Eli and Jasper talking about it. And August and I aren’t together—we aren’t mates—but I can’t leave him to die. I need to see him.”
More silence resonated.
Some of their anger shifted to annoyance.
It was time to bring out the big guns.
Or the biggest guns I had, at least.
I had no idea if it would work, but I had to try anyway.
“If you let me into the prison to see him, I’ll tell you how he got me through heat without sealing the bond,” I said.
Suddenly, the anger and irritation was gone.
They sat up straighter.
I had their complete attention.
“You don’t want to be tied down. I get it. If you let me talk to him, I’ll list out exactly what happened between us and when it happened. You don’t have to like him, and you don’t have to like me, but we did what only one other dragon couple has managed.”
More silence followed.
Long, tense silence.
Many of the guys exchanged loaded looks that I couldn’t read.
Finally, they looked at Jasper.
Another moment passed before he dipped his head. “We agree to your terms.”
My heart nearly stopped.
Relief rolled through me.
“You’ll shower in August’s room and spend the night there, in case there’s any lingering possessiveness or scent sensitivity,” Jasper said. “In the morning, we’ll take you to him. After you’re satisfied, you give us the information.”
“Should you choose to withhold it for any reason, you’ll end up in prison yourself,” one of the other dragons added.
A few of them growled.
A couple others stiffened.
“Mates should be off-limits,” one of the guys finally argued. “Our issue is with him, not her.”
“She’s not his mate.” Another of the guys tossed a hand toward me.
He wasn’t wrong.
And there was still a chance August would want nothing to do with me once he saw me.
But it was a chance I was willing to take.
Without further ado, two of the dragons I didn’t know led me back through the hallways.