Rafe
No matter how much my life changes, the one thing I'll never get used to is fucking gnomes.
I turn the corner and almost jump out of my skin at the sight of Casagnoma in the middle of the hall, ugly face tarnished and reddened from years in the weather.
He gets to lead a more comfortable life these days ...
since our son decided he was his best friend.
"Julian Taylor Ortega!" I shout, plucking the thing from the floor and holding it out in front of me. "What did I tell you about Casagnoma?"
He tears into the room, cackling his little head off. "We're playing hide and seek."
"Not well. Maybe Casagnoma needs to hide somewhere no one will ever find him again."
Julian hugs him to his chest. "But then I won't find him."
"That's the point."
Cam's warm laugh comes from behind me. "Papa loves him. He's just pretending. Why don't you and Casagnoma go and hide and I'll come and find you?"
Julian takes off, thankfully taking the creepy thing with him.
"That gnome's watching me."
Cam takes me by the hips and gives me his we're doing this again look. "Watching?"
"This is your fault. You conditioned me to hate him, then conditioned our son to love him. It's all part of your diabolical plan to be the favorite."
"Yes, my plan that started long before the twins were born."
"You've always been playing the long game."
"When it comes to you, I can't deny it."
Even though I'm pretend sulking, I let him pull me into a kiss. When it comes to Cam, all he needs to do is say one sweet thing and my backbone disappears. It's the same with the kids, which is why Casagnoma has managed to invade our home in the first place.
Not just Casagnoma either. Because it couldn't only be one gnome.
I'm beginning to think I might have a phobia of the horrible things with how I avoid going into the twins' bedroom.
All those glassy eyes and fishing rods going nowhere ...
I shudder and Cam's hand presses tighter to my back. "Stop thinking about the gnomes."
"They're everywhere."
"Daddy, I'm ready!" Julian yells from somewhere--definitely the kitchen--in the house.
"Better go. He has your patience."
Cam ducks off before I can dispute that. Out of the two of us, he's the one who can't be still for a minute.
Having kids has been good for him in that way. Whenever he's not working, it's all park visits or fort building or pretending to be a monster as he chases them around the house. I'm the dad they come to when they want to draw or build lego or plant things in the garden.
"Papa!" Sofia cries out in her panicked tone, and it jolts something deep inside me. I take the stairs two at a time and find her in her bedroom, head stuck in the armhole of her shirt. The tension leaves me the second I see she's okay.
"What have you done?" I ask and there's so much affection in my voice that I barely recognize myself.
"I'm stuck!"
"I can see that."
"Help me."
Help her. Right. That's an easy and reasonable thing to do. My gaze strays to the shelves of gnomes on their wall, and all the silent judgment directed my way. Given they're the ones who are strumming fake guitars and talking to frogs, I don't know where they get the audacity to judge me.
"Papa!" Sofia stomps her foot. "Help!"
Ignoring everything inside me that doesn't want to enter the room, I cross the threshold and go to her.
I have no idea how she's managed this one, but with only one complaint and a lot of manoeuvring, we get her head back out the right way and get the shirt in place.
One sleeve is slightly more stretched out than the other, but she won't hear about changing it.
Since bringing these two into our lives, I've really learned how to pick my battles.
Where Cam and I would go head to head on everything, that's impossible when it comes to kids.
If I tell them no, I've learned to mean it, because these two are way too smart for their own good, and they know that if they want a guaranteed yes, they go to Cam.
I'd say that he's working on that, but I'm confident he never will.
"Everything okay in here?" Cam asks from the doorway. Julian is on his hip, Casagnoma clutched under his arm.
"Wardrobe malfunction," I answer. "It's all under control."
"Good job, Papa." He sets Julian down. "Go play."
The kids run off and I exit the room as fast as humanly possible.
"Some days I think they're just like you and enjoy fucking with me."
"What makes you say that?" he asks.
"She's been dressing herself for months now. How did she get stuck in her own clothes?"
"Would it make you feel better if I moved the gnomes back out to the yard?"
Picturing them hiding behind my plants and popping out from behind the pots? "Definitely not. You could launch them into the sun though?"
"I would if you wanted me to."
And as much as I don't like the beady little eyes, and nighttime in their bedroom creep me out enough to keep me up half the night, there's no way I could do that to Julian.
"Our son loves them."
Cam puts on a mystified voice. "It's so weird."
"Weird. Sure. And not that you made them fun from the second he first saw Casagnoma."
"I'm sorry, baby."
He sounds like he means it, and I know he does.
I'd worried the smallest amount that once the twins came, it would change things between us.
That they'd become our priority and we wouldn't have time left for the other person.
In the early days, it was a bit like that.
One-year-olds aren't easy, especially when you haven't had the time to warm up to them, and for at least the first year everything was a new learning experience.
But we got there, and now I couldn't imagine my life without them. Cam and I are as solid as ever, and not only do we get to have fun together, we have two little people we get to share the fun with as well.
Cam bonds with them both over football.
I read to them every night.
We go camping, and bake most Sundays, and in winter we hibernate with board games and cocoa, and sometimes we all just need space from each other and do our own things, which works great for us too.
My mom especially is obsessed with them, and she still oversteps sometimes, but I'm getting better at telling her when it happens.
"I still find it so weird this is our life, when if you'd asked me twenty years ago, I was convinced you were ready to replace me."
"What do you mean?"
"When you went off to your fancy high school. And replaced me as your best friend."
"I never replaced you. I was protecting myself."
"I know." I smile and run my fingers through his messy blond hair. He cut it short once, hated it, and never tried again. "Things turned out the way they were supposed to."
"I guess you could say we have a love like gnome other."
I can't even sigh, I'm so used to him and his puns these days, and he wouldn't be my Cam without them. I can see Julian growing up to be exactly like him, whereas Sofia is already taking on a lot of my personality.
"Maybe it's time to share that love with one more," I say carefully, voicing a thought I've had pop up over and over for the last few months.
"Are you saying you're ready for number three?"
"As long as you promise me you'll get this next one hooked on Bluey or something."
"Talking dogs? That's creepier than the gnomes."
"It really isn't."
"Let's just both agree that you're wrong."
"We won't be doing that."
Slowly a smile pulls at his face. "But we are doing this? Going through it again?"
"It took a while the first time, and Julian and Sofia are settled now so ..."
"Yes."
"You're in?"
Cam laughs, pressing a happy kiss to my mouth. "Haven't you learned yet? I'm in for it all. You and me, Rafe. I want everything with you."
I feel the exact same way. Always have. "I love you," I tell him. "Forever and ever."
"Gnome matter what."