Chapter Nineteen Hollis
Chapter Nineteen
Hollis
Later that morning, I curled up next to Audrey on the couch in Reed’s living room, all my senses waking up at the sight and smell of homemade banana bread on my plate. “I take it I like that?”
“I always make it for you whenever you’re in town. It’s the reason you put up with my chattiness when we first met. Stuck around for my baking skills, wound up stuck with a best friend.”
I frowned, thinking back to what I’d learned about our relationship before flying here yesterday. “Something tells me it’s the other way around. You got stuck with me.”
She picked up the iced tea I’d already rejected in the kitchen and balanced her own plate on her thighs. “No one I’d rather be stuck with.”
Sweet and undeserved. I’d lied to her for eight years about who I really was. The guys had said I did it to protect her from my world, but did that make me any better than my mother?
I took a bite, and a soft moan slipped out before I could stop it. “Is this better than sex?” I joked, drawing a laugh from Audrey.
I could feel Reed’s eyes before I saw them. When I checked the kitchen, he was holding his laptop in one hand, standing between Ryder and Alex, staring at me instead of the screen.
“It’s not better, I can assure you.” Audrey’s amused tone didn’t pull me back to her—not yet. Not with Reed still pinning me in place with those dark eyes that could’ve coaxed another moan out of me.
Nothing between us.
Nothing between us.
I had to keep reminding myself of that fact, especially with that dream rolling around in my head, feeling more honest than anything else currently in my life.
Reed arched his shoulders back, lightly shaking his head before Ryder nudged him to pay attention.
As I watched the three men work and talk, it only just occurred to me—where was Chase? Trevor? And why hadn’t I thought to ask about them five minutes ago when she came over with her husband and brother? Some kind of friend I am.
Maybe it was because I’d been a little bummed by the intrusion. I’d just been getting into the show Reed had me watching all morning, Mad Men. We’d sat there on the couch with Ranger asleep between us as if it were the most normal thing for us to be doing.
Reed was probably just happy I’d kept my mouth shut and hadn’t brought up the dream again, or asked questions about his personal life.
“So, where’s Chase?” I finally managed to get the words out after taking my last bite.
“When Trevor is in town, he works security at the church. Chase, Eden, and my brother’s wife, Seraphina, are with him.” Audrey took my plate from me and slid it beneath her barely touched one, setting both dishes on the coffee table alongside her tea.
She folded her legs underneath her, twisting around to better face me, propping her elbow on the back of the couch, resting her other hand on her stomach, hiding a tiny burp with the back of her hand. “Sorry, baby’s fault.”
“Congratulations, by the way. I’m sure I said that before, though.” I stole a quick look at Alex. “He seems like a great dad. Trevor too.”
“They are.” She smiled, some of that nervous energy hopefully waning.
I didn’t want her to be awkward around me, even if I was that way around her. Maybe if we had something to fill the—
“Music?” she offered, reading my mind. “I heard it can help trigger memories.” She grabbed her phone from the table.
“I’d love that, thank you.” I glanced at the built-in cabinets on each side of the TV for a brief moment before looking into the kitchen. I hated being a useless fixture on the couch while they worked my case without me.
Reed was now sitting at the table, in the same chair I’d swear was from my dream. He casually looked over at me while sipping what had to be his third cup of coffee this morning.
“She’s pulling together a list for us,” Ryder said, and Reed set down his mug and eyed his team leader’s screen just as faint notes from a piano reached my ears.
“What do you think?” Audrey asked as the music played from her phone sitting on top of the pillow between us. “If you don’t like it, don’t tell me, though.”
I closed my eyes and listened. “It’s beautiful,” I whispered. “Sounds familiar. Do I know it?”
“You’ve only heard it when I’ve played it for you. It’s not been released yet.”
I opened my eyes, curious. “How do you have it?”
“Well, the piano you heard in the background? That’s me playing. As for the guitar and singing . . . definitely not me. That’s Calliope Costa. Well, she goes by Callie.”
I let the last note fade, taking it all in, right along with my best friend’s talent. “You’re a musician?”
“Pianist.” She hitched a noncommittal shoulder. “Wild story, but back in February when I was in danger because of my ex—”
“Trevor placed you in danger?” I couldn’t imagine him being a threat if he was such a great dad and still in their lives.
“No, no.” Audrey lowered her voice and clarified, “Different ex.” She rested her hand on her stomach.
“Anyway, um, while you were helping keep me safe, this Italian family, the Costas, watched over Seraphina. After, I got to know them, and one of their wives is a country singer. She won an award for her hit ‘Not Mine to Keep.’ Asked me to play the piano for her next single, and that’s the one you just heard. It’ll be out later this year.”
I peeked at her screen and hit play again. “It says ‘Untitled.’”
“Callie called last week to discuss song titles, but we didn’t decide on one yet.”
“‘Never the Same,’” I said as the song came to a close. “That’s what I’d call it, and it’s wild how much I can relate to the music, like it could’ve been written about what I’m going through.”
“No, because you will be the same again. You’ll get your memories back.” She paused the music and leaned forward to grip my forearm. “And if that book exists, and that formula was used on you, then there has to be an antidote.”
“Reed told you about the book?”
“Well, Reed told the team, and Alex isn’t so great at keeping secrets from me.
” She patted my arm, then let go. “When two people get married, they become one, right? So, in his defense, he told his other half.” She trailed her fingers over her baby bump in light strokes, and I couldn’t help but think about my dream yet again.
I’m a mother in my dreams. Why?
“I just know you’ll find your other half, your ‘the one’ when the time is right for you,” she said with air quotes and a small smile.
“So I really don’t date, huh? My brothers said that, which was why they didn’t believe I was with a guy.” And that reminds me. “Sorry for lying about why I was in Italy. If only I told you the truth, then maybe I wouldn’t be in this position now.”
“Maybe you were there for Tristan, so it wasn’t technically a lie. It’s not like you said you were romantically involved with the guy you were going there with.”
She was too good to me, truly. “Alex tell you about Tristan, too?”
She nodded, pulling her mouth off to the side as if suppressing something.
“Another apology I owe you. For not telling you about him, especially when you discovered you also had a half brother,” I added, tipping my head toward said brother. “I suck.”
“Nope, no feeling bad, not on my watch.” She took hold of my arm again, gently tugging it in a request to look at her, so I hesitantly surrendered.
“You’re way too patient and forgiving.”
“Years of being tested by an energetic kiddo will do that,” she said with a light laugh, but something told me what she really wanted to do was cry.
“Everything okay?” Alex asked, coming to his wife’s rescue.
His timing was perfect. I had no idea how to make things right. Not even a little better. For her. Me. For anyone.
Audrey pulled her hand away and answered, “Of course.”
At the sight of Ryder and Reed heading over now, I stood and faced everyone. “Anything?”
“It’s almost like it never happened.” Ryder lifted his hand as if to say, I know it did, don’t worry. “The source code Julian created and was allegedly stolen from him . . . it’s like nothing the Department of Defense or CIA has ever seen.”
“Well, um, Julian mentioned a name yesterday.” At least my new memories were still there. “A Gwen someone? He said she might be able to help, but Gideon said my parents would reject the idea.”
“Gwen’s already been pulled in, per orders of the secretary of defense,” Ryder said flatly.
“Along with a few other teams,” Alex added while helping Audrey stand. “Falcon Falls Security, for one. Secretary Chandler’s son, Gray, co-runs Falcon.”
“Let me guess, I’ve worked with them before, too?”
Alex smirked and nodded. “Don’t suppose the name Carter Dominick rings any bells, does it? He co-runs the team with Gray.”
I shook my head. “Not a one.” The only one who managed to ring my bell was standing a few feet away, pinning me with his broody stare, and my cheeks were about to heat up as I remembered our five a.m. moment when I’d startled him awake, finding him in only boxers and stiff.
“Falcon Falls has a lot of resources even our government can’t access. Connections to other powerful people and organizations that work outside government red tape to get results,” Ryder continued, intruding on my dirty thoughts.
“What about the Costas? Did Constantine find anything?” Audrey asked, then quickly explained to me he was Callie Costa’s brother-in-law, and his family was also assisting with my case.
“The hotel manager gave him the same answers he provided Gideon. You appeared to be traveling alone. No one saw anyone with you—not at the hotel, at least.” Ryder explained what I’d expected to hear: that there’d been no hookup happening.
“Constantine has contacts all over Italy. Someone had to have seen something.”
“There’s one other lead we’re following,” Alex said before I had a chance to digest the Constantine news—or, well, lack thereof. “Someone we know had her memories wiped a few years ago. Trevor’s cousin, actually.”
My stomach tightened as I rounded the couch to draw closer to them, the sweetness of the banana bread turning to lead in my stomach.
“His cousin Tessa was also taken,” Alex went on. “Woke up in a hospital with no memory of what happened to her while she’d been missing, but she remembered who she was.”
“We figured it was worth looking into.” Ryder rocked back on his heels, quietly assessing me. “Her husband’s team never figured out how it was done. They assume it was a combination of drugs and hypnosis.”
“Tell me she eventually remembered what happened to her,” I said like a plea as Ranger came over to sit next to me.
“Unfortunately not,” Ryder responded while I crouched to pet Ranger. “But Gwen’s building a program to compile and cross-reference any memory-loss-related cases. Should have the list by tomorrow at the latest.”
“But there’s no guarantee the same drug used on them or Trevor’s cousin was the one used on me.
Doubtfully by the same person.” My thoughts drifted back to that mystery book and formula.
There had to be a connection—how could there not be?
“There’s just no way it’s a coincidence I was searching for a cure to memory loss, and then this happened to me. ”
“Wait, what?” Audrey stepped closer. “You were looking for the book for a cure?”
I clocked a surprised look from Alex, but Ryder turned to the side and palmed his jaw like this wasn’t news to him. Why hadn’t Reed told them both the whole story?
I kept quiet, unable to answer Audrey, too busy reading everyone’s body language.
Audrey shot Reed a wide-eyed, questioning look, and he subtly lifted his hand and patted the air while lightly shaking his head, as if telling her to back down.
What was that all about? “Yes.” I finally broached the awkward quiet while standing tall. “Julian said I was planning to reverse the formula once I found it. Save memories, not steal them.”
Audrey walked backward, right into her husband, and he caught hold of her arms.
“Anyone want to tell me what’s going on?” I cut to it, trying to fend off the return of anxiousness. I was currently comfortably sitting between panic and calm, and wasn’t in the mood to let the pendulum swing all the way over to the shaky side.
“Now’s not the time,” Reed said in a low voice, eyeing Alex, not me, who was staring at him as well. “Please,” he tacked on, now studying me with a somber request in his gaze.
There was so much hurt and pain in his eyes that all I could do was nod and agree.
“Do we, um . . . know anything about my grandfather? My mother said he passed, but he’s the one who raised Tristan until he was eighteen. Maybe he’s the key to figuring out more about this mystery brother and that book.”
Reed visibly relaxed at the reprieve I’d given him by changing subjects.
“If he really raised Tristan, there’s no legal record of it.
No evidence of anything relating to your brother, in fact.
Gwen did the digging, too, so if she couldn’t find anything, it’s more than buried—it’s nonexistent.
” Ryder removed his hat, squeezed both sides of the brim, then put it back face forward.
“And we confirmed your grandfather did die back in 2012.”
I mindlessly petted Ranger. “From what?”
“Heart attack. Home alone at the time,” he answered.
I waited to feel grief. To feel something.
“You okay?” Audrey asked as I stood, resting her hand on my forearm. “Shoot, sorry, of course you’re not. Maybe rest?”
To stay put or run? I was torn, but went with a “Probably a good idea,” in response.
“If you’re up for it, maybe tomorrow we can watch a movie or something?” she suggested.
“Sure.” I peeked around Audrey to locate Reed. He was in the kitchen now, hands on the breakfast bar, muscles tight and spine stiff.
Now wasn’t the time to ask him if he was okay—not in front of his friends—but he was clearly far from it.
“Come on, Ranger.” I patted my leg. “Thank you for your help.” I took off, only to stop walking once in the hallway.
I set my back to the wall and shut my eyes, my heart slamming hard against my rib cage.
Get a grip. Be strong. I issued a few more commands to myself, but none helped loosen the sadness now festering inside me like a disease.
I couldn’t pretend my way out of what I was feeling.
“Did you tell her about my dad?”
I immediately opened my eyes at Reed’s words, snapping me from sad to alert within a second.
“Alex told you, so . . . did you tell Hollis?” Reed asked someone.
“Of course not,” Audrey responded, her voice low but audible enough for me to still hear. “Do you think she was trying to find a cure for your dad?”
“Just forget I said anything, please,” Reed rushed out. “I’m going outside, and for the love of all that’s holy, no one follow me.”
Now I knew why Reed was so on edge. You think I was trying to help your father. I wandered to my bedroom, gently closed the door, and dropped down on my bed. The question is . . . was I?