Chapter 19
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Not for nothing did Diana own a boutique. She loved fashion and had been known to dither over her outfit a time or two.
But changing her earrings for the fourth time was probably a bit much, even for her.
It was maybe time to admit that she was nervous. Like, really nervous.
Which was silly, of course. She knew Anthony and knew she could have a really nice time with him over dinner. Even if they didn’t click as dates, it wouldn’t be an evening she would regret, unlike so many of the other dates she’d gone on recently.
So why was she so gosh darn nervous?
“Probably because if it goes badly, I’m still going to have to see him,” she muttered to herself as she switched her earrings one last time, which just so happened to be the first pair she’d tried on in the first place.
Beneath her nerves, however, was this undeniable thread of optimism, one that had been vibrating inside her ever since Anthony had asked her out to dinner. Maybe this was the thing she’d been hoping for, the organic connection that didn’t come because she’d swiped one way or another on her phone.
She knew that online dating worked for a lot of people, but she was starting to think that it really just wasn’t right for her.
When the knock came at her door, Diana checked her earrings just one last time, then threw her hands up at herself and went to go answer.
Anthony was wearing a light blue button-down shirt with the top button undone.
He was wearing khaki pants, and his hair was slightly damp, like he’d taken a quick shower before coming over here.
The whole look was very handsome, even though it had the tiniest bit of dorkiness to it.
She liked that slight tinge of nerdiness to him.
He was an accountant and a single dad. It felt right.
Besides, it indicated that he had been telling the truth when he said his dating history was sparse, not that she’d doubted him. The whole thing made her feel just a little bit less nervous.
This was Anthony. She’d always gotten along well with Anthony, from the very first moment they’d met. It was going to be fine.
“Hi,” she said. She’d been staring, she realized suddenly. That wasn’t great.
“Hi,” he said back, a tiny, bashful expression on his face. “You, um. You look really nice.”
On instinct, Diana looked down at the floaty, cobalt blue dress she’d chosen for the evening. It was one of her favorites.
“Thank you,” she said. “You do too.”
There was a weird moment where they both seemed uncertain if they should speak or wait for the other one to talk. Then, Anthony cleared his throat.
“So, uh, I got us a reservation at the Captain’s Crest. I’ve never been there, but I’ve heard good things.”
“Oh, um, yeah,” Diana said, trying to cover up her instinctive wince. It wasn’t that Captain’s Crest was bad, after all. She’d had lots of dinners there, and they’d all been pretty good. It was just… a little predictable.
Maybe Anthony picked up on her reluctance, because he seemed to grow a little more awkward, a little more uncertain, and Diana felt bad about being the one to make that happen.
It’s just nerves, she told herself. He’ll get better. We’ll both get better. I’m not giving up on this night just yet.
Anthony’s dating experience was way, way out of date, but he was pretty sure that this was not going well at all.
He was just really nervous. He kept telling himself that he was going to shake it any minute now, but as the appetizers were brought to their table, he had not yet managed to loosen up.
He looked down at the herbed zucchini fritters with homemade yogurt sauce and tried to think of anything to say that didn’t make him look like a total goofball.
But ninety nine percent of his conversations over the past few years had been about accounting or kid stuff. Was it possible that he had literally forgotten how to speak to another adult if it wasn’t about parent teacher associations or snack rotations?
“I’m sorry,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m being… so awkward.”
He had hoped this would lighten the mood, and it did a tiny bit, but not enough.
Diana scrunched her nose, looking absolutely adorable. “Yeah, me too,” she said.
“I think it’s just nerves,” he said, just at the same moment as she said, “I’m kind of nervous.”
In another world, in a romantic comedy or something like that, this would have been the moment where they laughed, where all the tension broke and they laughed and things went fine from there on out.
Instead, it just stayed… off.
The worst part of it, Anthony decided as he ate his truly delicious filet of fish over a mixed summer vegetable medley, was that Diana was clearly trying to make things comfortable for them both. And he just couldn’t manage to meet her energy. He was trying. It just wasn’t working.
The dessert menu looked amazing, but Anthony was grateful when Diana said she didn’t want to eat anything more.
They kept up their not quite comfortable conversation as Anthony drove her back to her house.
He opened the door for her and walked her up to the door, trying to salvage something of this uncomfortable evening.
She smiled at the gentlemanly gesture, so when he got to her front door, he made the colossally foolish mistake of trying to kiss the back of her hand.
He really thought it was a good idea right up until he actually did it. It would be romantic, he thought.
It wasn’t. It was super, super awkward.
“Oh,” Diana said.
Anthony wished he could sink directly through the earth.
“I am so sorry,” he said. “I thought that was going to go better in my head than it did in real life.”
Diana still looked a little bemused, but she gave him a kind look. “Oh, yeah, that’s okay,” she said.
Anthony barely remembered what he said as he bid her goodnight, since his mind was mostly just internal cringing over how dreadful he had been all evening.
He got into his car, pulled out of the driveway, and drove down the block.
And then, as soon as Diana’s house was out of sight, he pulled over and pressed his forehead against the steering wheel so he could let out a strangled groan.
That had been… not good. And it was embarrassing, yeah, that he couldn’t manage to act normally for just a few hours.
But somehow the part of it that stung the most was that Diana would see him as just another bad date.
Any friendship between them was certainly destined to be over too.
There was no way she was going to want to see him again after this.
He would have to settle for being her accountant and nothing more.