29. JENSEN
29
I look around the yard, seeking Rae's blonde hair. When I find her, my heart stops when our gazes collide, and the world freezes for just a brief second.
I smile, a clear desire dripping from my face, I’m sure.
She does the same. My feelings for her seem to be growing bigger by the minute, and soon, I know I’ll reach that point of no return. If I haven’t already. Then I blink, and the moment is over, as someone approaches me from the side.
“Jensen, nice to see you.” Johnny offers me his hand with a genuine smile, and I grab it in greeting. Even though he’s dressed the same, in dark jeans and a dress shirt, he looks different in the company of his family. More relaxed, maybe.
“Likewise, sir.”
“How was the trip?”
“It was good,” I reply genuinely, trying to hide the loop of memories involving his niece that’s going through my head. “I’ve never been on a trip across the country, but it’s been fun.”
Johnny eyes me, and I swear I can briefly see a hint of wariness, and I don’t like it. Now that I know how close he is to Rae, I want him on my side, and I have a feeling he’s not going to be the easiest person to please. Not like her little sister, who I already wrapped around my finger by telling her how much I loved her collection of gemstones.
“It’s a long trip, but it’s a beautiful one,” Johnny agrees. “Did my niece continue to give you a hard time?”
I think back to the first two days of our trip, and the glaring looks she gave me, but they are quickly replaced by her vibrant smile, fueling my good mood.
“At first, yes. But eventually, she loosened up.”
“She’s a good girl.” His focus goes to Rae sitting on a bench in the back of the yard, with a girl which I’m assuming is her cousin that possesses her same vibrant smile, yet her hair is a chocolate brown. “She’s been through a lot.”
“I assumed so, sir.” Though I’m not sure what he means.
“Did my sister give you and Bodi the guest room?” Johnny asks with a wary look.
“Yes, sir.”
He nods, his eyes narrowing in a clear warning. “I suggest you stay there as soon as it’s lights out.”
I press my lips together, suppressing the laugh that wants to break out at his comment, acting like I’m twelve. Normally, I’d be pissed, but I don’t think there is anything that can turn my gleeful mood.
My phone dings in my hand, and I quickly glance at it.
EMILY: I miss you. When will you be in New York?
I clear my throat, annoyed.
“Everything okay?” Johnny asks, eying my screen.
“Yeah. Everything is fine.” I give him a tight smile, which he returns with a skeptical nod.
He probably doesn’t believe a word I’m saying. The mood becomes a bit awkward as we silently watch Rae, before I turn my attention back to Johnny. A sadness creeps into his features as he stares at his niece. Suddenly, he looks older than the forty years he has been alive, and nothing like the man I know as my General Manager.
There’s a fatherly love in his eyes I’ve never seen before, and at this moment, I respect him even more for it, even if he’s still on the fence about me.
“She briefly told me she had a hard time as a teenager?” I ask, hoping he will tell me more.
“She did. We almost lost her.” The words sound ominous, and a tight feeling enclasps my chest as I continue listening to him, curious in what way. “My sister couldn’t handle her. Neither could my brother-in-law. I was the only one who got through to her, but I lived on the other side of the country. She hated me when I took her to LA, but I couldn’t do anything else. This was the only way to let her keep her freedom and keep an eye on her.”
My mind is running overtime, trying to understand what exactly he’s saying. She told me she had a rebellious phase, but this sounds like there is more to it than just some teenager going to a few parties too many. My gut spurs me to keep asking questions, but for some reason, I feel like I should ask Rae first, so I keep my mouth shut.
“Glad you did, sir.”
He twists his head to look at me, a coy smile now clearly visible. It could be nothing, but it feels like a small victory. “I like you, Jensen. You’re a pain on the ice, but you’re a good guy.”
I expect him to tell me more, at least threaten me a bit like the big brother he seems to be for her, but unexpectedly, he stays quiet.
“That’s it? You’re not going to tell me you’ll break my legs if I hurt her? That you will destroy my career if I break her heart?”
He snorts, amused. “From what I can tell in the tabloids, you have a few things to figure out first. Besides, the look in your eyes tells me you’re fucked anyway.” He slaps my shoulder, then squeezes it for a second. “Just be patient with her.”
A smile slips in, knowing he’s right.
I’m fucked, and I don’t even care.
“I will, sir.”
“Now, I apologize in advance, but my mother seems to be desperate for a word with you.” He nudges his chin to my left. Rae’s grandmother points at the chair next to her, silently inviting me to come sit. “Here, take this. You’ll probably need it.”
Johnny offers me his tumbler of whiskey, and I eagerly grab it, mumbling a thanks before I saunter toward the chair.
Evelyn Pearce has long gray hair that’s perfectly styled, with green eyes that seem to follow me like a hawk. She looks like a classy, sophisticated lady, reminding me of my mother, but the fire in her eyes tells me she’s completely different. Evelyn Pearce clearly isn’t afraid to protect her own; you can see it in her entire stance. She’s a lioness.
“Nice to meet you, Jared James Jensen.” She nods approvingly when I take the seat next to her.
“You too, Mrs. Pearce.”
“Oh, please. Call me Evelyn. Or Nana. Whatever seems more fitting.”
I chuckle when she winks at me. The woman is the epitome of a southern belle, and she must have been a gorgeous woman back in her day.
“I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that, ma’am.”
“Suit yourself.” The old woman pats my leg, and I smile at her, hoping to get on her good graces while bringing the glass to my lips.
“You’re in love with my granddaughter.” She states it with a certainty that has me laughing and choking at the same time.
She is not wasting any time.
“Am I?”
“Oh, you don’t fool me, boy. I can see it in your eyes when you look at her. How you stare at her just a little longer than necessary. Admit it. You’re falling in love with her.”
I sigh.
What is love, really? I don’t know, but I do know I haven’t felt like this before. Not with anyone. I don’t even think I’ve ever witnessed it.
“I don’t know, ma’am,” I reply, honestly.
“Do you think about her before you go to sleep?”
“Yes,” I say without hesitation.
“Do you think about her when you wake up?”
“Yes.”
“Does your heart rate speed up when she enters the room?”
Automatically, my eyes find hers, feeling my chest expand. “Yes.”
“That’s love.” The tone in her voice leaves no room for discussion, like she is an expert on the matter.
“That easy, huh?”
“Just because everyone treats it like it’s rocket science, doesn’t mean it is.” She shrugs. “Have you told her?”
“No.” I shake my head, adamant.
Waking up this morning, I realized I felt more for her than I initially pretended to. Being with her feels natural, like I can be me instead of the person everyone expects me to be. But right now, my future is dictated by others, and Rae is not part of their plan. My parents might have given me this week, but I know there’s a shitstorm coming as soon as I leave North Carolina. Something I’m not looking forward to.
But it’s also something I need to sort before I push this any farther. Just to make sure I don’t let her walk into the lion’s den unprepared.
I’m going to fight for her, but guns blazing is not the way to go.
“Don’t wait too long, boy.” She pats my arm in an encouraging way, like grandmas do. “She already has a wall as big as a skyscraper built around her cracked heart, protecting it with her life. If anyone tramples it anymore, she’ll put it in a vault and will never take it out again.”
I tilt my head, replaying her words in my head, then grind my teeth together when I realize what she means. “Kent hurt her that much?”
I know he hurt her ego, but after spending five days on the road with her, I didn’t feel like she was really heartbroken about Kent in general. She even admitted she wasn’t in love with him.
“Who?” Her eyebrows move to her hairline, a strand of her gray hair falling in front of her face because of the sudden movement.
“Kent. Sean Kent? Her ex?”
Nana pushes the strand back behind her ear, then raises her eyebrows in amusement. “That stupid jock? No offense,” she mutters, raising her hands in the air.
A chuckle leaves my lips as I throw the last of my whiskey down my throat.
“None taken.”
“No,” she huffs, indignant. “She didn’t give a shit about that boy, if you’re asking for my two cents. She just kept him around for the fun stuff, if you get what I mean.” She chats the last sentence with her hand in front of her mouth, and I smile politely. But really, the thought of Sean and Rae together has me grinding my teeth. “I don’t think she has ever been in love. Not really. Not like with you.”
I snap my head to the old woman with wide eyes, shocked at the bluntness of her words. “You think she’s in love with me, ma’am?”
Her eyes roll, as if I just asked the stupidest question.
“God, you children nowadays really like to beat around the bush, don’t you? What do you kids call that? Playing hard to forget?”
“Playing hard to get , mother.” June joins us with a beer in both hands. “Don’t listen to my mother. When you get older, you don’t really care about being polite anymore.” She offers me a coy smile, then hands me one of the beers.
I place my empty glass on the floor next to me, then take the beer from her perfectly manicured hand. “Thanks.”
“Mother, you are needed in the kitchen.”
“What for?” Nana screeches, clearly not in a hurry to leave.
“Something with the cake. I think Johnny busted the side.”
“I swear if that boy took a bite of that cake when I told him not to, he’ll be getting a shitload of chores tomorrow.”
“Mama, he’s forty. Besides, he’s leaving tomorrow, so he’s not going to do chores.”
“I don’t care if he’s eighty and senile; if he touches that cake, he’s going to mow the damn lawn before he goes back to his fancy LA life.”
I snicker as I listen to both women bickering, shaking my head at the love that’s still detectable. When my parents are bickering, it’s filled with venom, always a clear snarl to whoever is the recipient. Being around them is stressful, because you’re constantly on edge, fearful of what you might be doing wrong this time. But these two women clearly respect one other deeply.
“Sorry about that,” June says when Nana stomps off to the kitchen. “I hope she didn’t scare you away? We’re really a very friendly family. In general.”
“No, ma’am. I’m a governor’s son. I’ve been spending my holidays with senators and other intimidating people since I was little. We’ve been drilled to talk to scary people. Though I’m sure your mother can be really intimidating, I’d rather talk to her than Judge Jefferson of the Supreme Court.”
“Hmm, that makes sense,” she muses, taking a pull from her beer.
We stay quiet, standing beside each other, and my eyes move through the yard. Bodi is chatting with Rae and Kayla, all three of them laughing about something he says. Her smile works as a beacon, lighting my world every time she laughs. Her energy draws my eyes toward her, even when she’s not trying. It has always been like that, but I haven’t really understood what that meant until the last few days. She’s like my northern star in the dark of the night.
“She told me I’m in love with your daughter,” I admit, bringing my beer to my lips. I’m not sure where my sudden honesty comes from, but I guess part of me is dying to know her opinion on the matter. The bitter liquid falls on my tongue, right when Rae finds me with her eyes and gives me a small wave. My heart jumps, and I give her a wink.
“I highly doubt that. I’ve heard you are a bad boy, but I doubt you will fall in love with a ten-year-old.”
Confused, I turn my head. “I don’t follow.”
“Even though Rae is my daughter in every sense of the word, I’m not her mother.”
My eyebrows quirk up.
“She’s my niece. I’m her aunt. That’s my husband. My sister was her mother.” She points at Christopher, who’s briefly been introduced to me, grilling burgers behind the barbeque. “We took her in after the crash.”
My head starts to spin, and I’m not sure if I’m hearing her correctly.
“What crash?” I ask, a lump forming in the back of my throat.
She sighs, closing her eyes for a brief moment. “I already assumed she didn’t tell you. When she was nine, they took a trip to the Bahamas. The plane had a malfunction. It crashed into the sea in front of the coast of Miami. My sister and my brother-in- law didn’t survive, along with a hundred other passengers. Only ten people survived. Rae was one of them.”
A tight feeling forms around my throat, and I just blink, shocked. It feels as if time slows down while a cold shiver makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
The planes.
How did I miss that?
“She doesn’t fly,” I breathe, suddenly realizing why.
June shakes her head. “When we arrived in Miami, the government arranged a flight for us back to North Carolina, along with the bodies of my sister and brother-in-law. But we couldn’t get Rae onto that plane. She went ballistic. The only option was to drug her, but I refused. We rented a car to get back home. She has refused to fly ever since. I tried. Johnny tried. She doesn’t fly.”
“I didn’t know.” It’s all I can say, trying to wrap my head around what I just found out.
“I know.” June’s voice is soft and friendly, but there is an urgency detectable. “I don’t want this to be one of those cliché things, where you get schooled and questioned by every person in the family about the girl you fell in love with. Because, yeah, my mother isn’t the only one who notices the longing looks across the yard. I think the whole party knows.” She gives me a coy but loving smile. “And I’m pretty sure I know her well enough to know she feels the same. But she’s been hurt and never fully recovered. That Sean Kent guy screwing around didn’t help, although she’s too proud to admit. Caring for someone scares her. She will push you away. But she’s worth sticking around for.”
My chin moves a bit up, my shoulders relaxing as I exhale deeply, believing every word she’s saying.
“I know, ma’am. And I want to fight for her.”