Chapter 2
Lock
Scrubbing my face with my hand, I let out a long groan. Mark sat across from me in my sitting room, looking just as lost as I felt. Vampires didn’t need sleep, but right now I thought a good twelve hours might help this weariness I felt.
It had been six hours since Sam woke and I didn’t feel any better about it. Once we’d finished our bath, she’d complained about needing more blood, so Mark had brought up some fresh bottles from our bleeders. She’d drunk three of them before she finally felt better. I’d insisted she sleep to help her mind calm down and she’d obliged, but I still heard her tossing and turning restlessly.
“Did you talk to your guy in Rome?” I asked quietly.
“Yeah. It’s hard without giving him specifics, but he’s seeing what he can dig up. The guy seems to get a kick out of it, which benefits us.”
“When she wakes, I’m taking her to Benny so he can do some tests. Her blood could tell us something useful.”
“Do you think she’ll be okay with acting as a lab rat?”
“I think she will want answers as much as we do. She’s struggling more than she should be.”
“She drank a lot of blood, even for her first day.”
“I know. I don’t understand how her body completed the change in twelve hours. If only I could ask Seraphim if his was faster as well.”
“I’d rather he just stayed away. She’s in no shape to deal with any sort of threat. I’m worried about her.”
“Worrying doesn’t help. We just need answers. I didn’t imagine it could be like this.”
“At least the storm has died down.”
Just then, thunder sounded overhead. The smell of smoke drew me to the bedroom and I swore. Sam was huddled in a corner with her hands covering her head. She was rocking back and forth while she cried.
I dropped to my knees in front of her, trying to pull her hands away. She just shook her head and tried to fight me off. Now that she was stronger, this was a lot more difficult. If I didn’t do something, though, she could burn this whole place down.
“Sam, look at me.”
When I tried to touch her again, I was hit by something invisible, making me crash into the window. It shattered and I had to shift so that I wouldn’t fall out of it. After materializing in front of her again, I let it sink in how bad this could be. She had no control over what was happening and the more emotional she got, the worse it became.
She wailed as she knelt on her hands and knees. Her fangs were fully extended, cutting into her lower lip. She seemed on the verge of hyperventilating from her sobs and I knew I had to think of something quickly. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if she was capable of razing the whole city with a panic attack.
I knelt in front of her slowly, keeping my hands on my knees. “Sam, it’s time to breathe.”
She shook her head. “I can’t.”
“The more upset you become, the worse this is.”
“I’m so fucking thirsty.”
Glancing at Mark, I jerked my chin. He headed out the door immediately, looking pained.
“Talk to me, Sam.”
“I don’t know what’s happening. I can’t control it. Why am I so thirsty?”
“You said that Seraphim told you magic used a lot of blood. You’ve been creating a constant storm out there. We have to find a way to stop it.”
“Kill me.”
My chest tightened. “Stop. Everything is going to be okay.”
“Lock, I’m so tired. I’m so fucking tired.”
“I know, baby. It’s ok. Come here.”
She recoiled from my outstretched hands. “No, I could hurt you.”
“Belladonna, you cannot hurt me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“You are my mate, Samara. Even if you’re struggling, your body knows it. My blood could help. Please.”
She shook her head back and forth. “No, no, no. I can’t do this. Please. I don’t want to do this anymore.”
“Stop that. We will figure it out. Just come here.” I grabbed her hips and pulled her onto my lap so she was straddling me. “Feed from me.”
“No. I can’t control it.”
“A mate’s blood is powerful. Feed.”
After another moment of hesitation, she dipped her head into my neck. The pierce of her fangs filled me with pleasure, making me tighten my arms around her.
“You know, when you were waiting in my office that day you marched in here, I heard you humming. It was the first time my feelings really started to solidify in my chest. I was smiling and it took me a moment to realize it. Do you remember what you were humming?”
She shook her head a tiny bit as she continued to feed.
“Silence by Marshmello. I found peace in your violence.” I sang a few of the lines, then laughed. “I remember thinking it was incredibly ironic.”
Thinking back to that time, I couldn’t help but smile at the memories. I’d been angry about my feelings then because I was an idiot.
“The next time I felt you taking over my heart was when you kissed me after your date with that idiot. You captivated me. I physically couldn’t stop. Remember, I couldn’t even leave that night. Just because you were crying. That was the best sleep I’d ever had, not just since becoming a vampire.”
She made a little sound in her throat and started to pull back, but I held her by the back of the neck, encouraging her to keep going.
“You know, it was that night I first thought you were a witch. It was the best explanation I could come up with for how you made me feel. I wouldn’t allow myself to think about the real reason back then. Guess I was right about that.
“I knew that I wanted to keep you after you killed Blake. I claimed you as mine, fucked my blood into you while we watched him die together. Mark said it was terrible, but it was one of the best days of my life. After that, I couldn’t stay away from you. You consumed my every thought; I wanted you by me for even the most trivial things. Your pain became my pain and your joy became mine.
“At some point, I decided I’d be happy to eat your terrible spaghetti for the rest of my existence, so long as it made you smile. Then I nearly killed you in that warehouse and it was the first time a tear has ever fallen from my eyes. What is that, if not the most powerful sort of bond? It was my mother who said I’d find something that ignited my soul. I never believed it until I found you.”
The door opened and Mark came in carrying a bag of blood bottles, pausing when he saw us on the floor. He looked at me questioningly and I just nodded. After setting the bag down, he left again.
“Things are hard now, Sam, but we will learn together. You don’t get to give up, just as I’ll never give up on you. Your battles are my battles. Our souls are inexplicably bound and I don’t care if you destroy this world with that magic in your veins. I will stand beside you and watch as it returns to what it once was- devoid of humans and their malice.”
This time when she pulled back, I let her. I was drained, so I reached over to grab the bag of blood bottles and drank two of them.
“How do you feel?”
“Better, but I can feel this energy in my veins. It’s like heat and electricity. I don’t know what to do with it.”
“Let’s go see Benny so he can take some blood samples. That might be able to tell us more than some boring, old books.”
“What if I hurt him?”
“You won’t, Sam. Part of learning to control your strength as a vampire is trusting yourself. I’m sure it’s the same with these extra abilities of yours.”
“I don’t know if I can do that.”
Leaning closer, I pressed my lips to hers. It was the first time we’d kissed since she woke and it sent me into overdrive. She seemed possessed by it as well. Her hands landed on the sides of my neck and she immediately opened her mouth to me. The scent and taste of her was different, but still similar enough that it felt familiar to me.
I tried not to react as the skin under her hands heated up. The shocks that traveled over my body made me tense up involuntarily. She pulled back quickly, jumping to her feet and staring down at me. The burns were already healing, but she still looked horrified.
“Oh my god.”
“Sam, stop.”
She pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes. It was clear she was trying to stay calm as she took controlled, shaky breaths. The wind picked up, gusts of it coming through the shattered windows. I came up to her, pulling her into my chest, but she shifted and flew outside.
Fuck.
That was the last thing we needed right now. I followed, trailing just behind her. She was whipping back and forth with the wind, clearly unable to maintain good control of herself. Parts of her kept materializing, then blacking out again. If she couldn’t stabilize herself, she was going to burn through all of that blood.
Orange smoke came at me and I barely moved out of the way in time. It was followed by a pale color, which intrigued me, but not enough to let it hit me. The most important thing was getting her back to the tower, preferably with the city in one piece.
She suddenly arced downward at an alarming speed. When she materialized on top of an office building, she fell and rolled a few times. I rushed over to her, helping her to her feet.
“What are you thinking?” I demanded. “We need to get back home.”
“No, I need help.”
“I’m trying to help you. Being out here isn’t going to help.”
“He can.”
“Who?”
“Seraphim.”
I stilled, looking around, but didn’t see him anywhere.
“He was watching when I was on the balcony,” she explained. “I think he used our connection to calm me.”
“He wouldn’t. It was made clear that if you changed, he’d have to kill you.”
“But he could’ve when I was up there. I was vulnerable, not even fully changed yet.”
“Regardless, what are we doing over here?”
“I can feel him, but I’m not sure exactly where. Somewhere around here.”
“So, I was right about the connection being stronger after you changed.”
“Or I’m just feeling it now too. I don’t know if it’s stronger for him.”
“Do you think he knows you’re here?”
“If he does, I doubt he’ll show himself, especially with you here.”
“Let’s go home, Sam. This won’t do us any good right now. You’re just going to need more blood if we’re running around the city.”
She looked around for another minute before sighing. “Fine. I don’t know how to shift, though. I didn’t mean to before.”
“Just imagine doing it. It’s like a muscle you’ll have to exercise.”
Her brow furrowed as she concentrated. I couldn’t help but laugh at the way her face reddened.
“You’re overthinking it.”
“Don’t piss me off or I’ll accidentally burn off your hair.”
“I’m glad your sense of humor is returning.”
“It wasn’t a joke.”
I put up my hands in a placating gesture, watching as she continuously failed to shift. When she finally accomplished it, I shot out in front of her, weaving between buildings and under overpasses. She was just behind me and I could sense the joy she got from our race. In the end, I reached the tower a moment before her, wearing a grin.
“Turns out I’m still the fastest.”
She snorted. “Only because I’m new.”
“We’ll see about that.”
Locking an arm around her waist, I pulled her backwards against my chest and grazed her neck with my teeth. Her head fell back against my shoulder as I kissed up to her jaw. There was heat building between our skin, but not enough to burn like before. Nevertheless, she quickly pulled away, her gaze dropping to the floor.
“Sam, it’s okay. You won’t actually hurt me.”
She cleared her throat before rummaging through her drawers. “I’m gonna change and then we can go see Benny.”
When the door to the bathroom locked behind her, I dropped onto the edge of the bed. She knew I could still get in, but it was her way of asking for privacy. I hated it.
Her connection to me would keep her from seriously hurting me. I was certain of that. Maybe ninety-five percent sure. Either way, we had to test it at some point. She’d never learn to trust herself with her abilities if she wouldn’t allow herself to explore them. We’d also never finish tethering ourselves to the mating bond if she wouldn’t allow me to touch her.
That brought another question to my mind, though. Would the connection make it easier or harder for her to handle her power? I was inclined to believe the former. Nature chose us to be mates. It wouldn’t push us together if it would end up destroying her.