Ivy
“I absolutely do not,” Leseldh breathed. He edged closer and a look of pure desire swept over his features. It made her tingle in all the right places.
“Let’s go slow tonight.” Her words were a request and a plea. He nodded in acknowledgement before bridging the gap between them. The kiss was tentative and brief, but only so he could ease her back onto the bed and crawl up her body.
“You are magnificent,” Leseldh breathed against her skin, and she shivered in response to his touch. His lips drifted down along her neck, tracing over her Creation scar, but purposefully avoiding the one on her chest.
“You are mine.”
Ivy felt his eyes burning her like a brand. Once his upper body was bare, he pressed against her. She purred as his body heat enveloped her. Their mouths connected once more, and in moments she was swept away by desire.
Ivy was seated at the large table in Leseldh’s library, poring over books on Vampire history and characteristics.
A range of titles were spread across the desk in small stacks or laying open on pages that took her interest. She was searching for information on Resonants but quickly found that despite the array of texts, they held no information on Vampire Mates.
Ivy was flicking through a book entitled Night’s Ardour when one of the library doors opened and Finare peered into the room.
“Thought I might find you here.” He dropped into a seat across from her, and his eyes swept over the books that littered the desk. A knowing smile spread across his lips. “What’s the topic of choice tonight? Trying to figure out why it’s always dark in Noctis?”
Ivy scoffed, “It’s because the Realms move, not the sun and moon. Noctis doesn’t move into the sun’s path.”
It was one of the crazier theories, but it was Ivy’s favourite. She smirked when Finare raised his eyebrows in surprise. She sighed before continuing, “I just wanted to know a little more about this Resonant stuff, but there’s nothing here.”
“I’m not surprised, really. I always thought Vampire Mates were a myth.” Finare shifted in his seat. His words sparked new concern deep in her gut.
“Why do you think that?”
“No Vampire I’ve ever known has been Mated to another. Mates are more of a Fae institution.”
Finare’s viewpoint contradicted hers, and she struggled to fit it against her own beliefs and experiences. The urge to disagree was strong, and she voiced her opinion quickly.
“But what about Leseldh and Malia? The way he talks about her...” Ivy’s words trailed off as she remembered the conversation about Malia in Oaris.
Leseldh’s conviction was absolute: he and Malia truly were Mates.
But it made Ivy wonder how she fit into the picture.
Although the previous night’s intimacy with Leseldh was better than their first time, she was disappointed to wake up alone yet again.
She still felt like something was missing, but her guilt lingered as she wondered if she was putting too much significance on their sex life.
“That’s true. But that’s just Leseldh’s side of the story. I wasn’t even born before Malia was Ended, so who knows how she really felt? Besides, Voresta doesn’t have a Mate.”
“I feel like that could be more of a commentary on Voresta, rather than an argument for or against Resonants.”
Finare laughed in response. “Also true.” He took in a deep breath and released it slowly. When he spoke again, his tone had become strangely serious. “But to understand my thinking, I guess you need to know a bit more how Mates work for the Fae.”
Ivy glanced at Finare’s pointed ears, and realised a wealth of untapped knowledge was sitting before her. Questions bubbled up her throat, but she held them behind her tongue for now, nodding for him to continue.
“When a Fae finds their Mate, the bond is forever. It even transcends the grave.”
“How so?”
“They mourn their fallen Mate until their own death.”
“They don’t find another?” Ivy’s question earned her a grimace from Finare.
“If a Mated Fae dies, the surviving Mate experiences what is called the Rend. It feels like one’s heart is being torn in two.
” A strange expression flickered across Finare’s features.
“To feel the Rend is to suffer for the rest of your life. The bond is forever altered and can’t be repaired, nor can the sufferer move on. ”
“I couldn’t think of anything worse.” Ivy’s inner thoughts passed her lips involuntarily as she processed Finare’s words. It was Finare’s turn to counter.
“It’s a sacred rite, and Fae who endure the Rend have both a heaviness and a fullness in their heart. The greatest honour is to love, and the Fae honour that love through the Rend.” Finare’s words held a gravity that took her by surprise.
Ivy realised that the passion Finare spoke with mirrored Leseldh’s on his iteration of the topic. But their differing opinions were too much for her clouded mind to reconcile. Silence fell as both Vampires sat with their thoughts for a moment.
“You know a lot about it. Did someone you know go through the Rend?” Ivy looked at Finare and noticed a hardness in his eyes that seemed out of place. He blew out another breath and spoke again.
“I’ve never told you my full story. In Cevoria, I was a part of the Zelphar clan, and I had a Mate.
His name was Eldwyn. He was beautiful—not just on the outside, but inside too.
He loved all creatures, and he was kind.
” Something like adoration coated Finare’s words, but his face otherwise remained impassive, which caused a strange feeling to settle in Ivy’s stomach.
“He was a warrior. He led a small party that defended Cunos against the Goblin tribes. But he was killed during one of the Goblin raids. I knew he was gone because the Rend almost killed me. It felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest. That was before his war party even came home.”
Ivy felt her eyes well with tears as Finare recounted his story. But when she looked at him, his face was still strangely devoid of emotion.
“I was sad for a very long time. Everything in Cunos reminded me of Eldwyn. No living Fae in my clan had experienced the Rend, so no one understood what I felt. I wanted to escape, if only for a bit, so I travelled to Noctis. The clan warned me against it, but I went anyway.” Finare’s level tone was at odds to the words he spoke—Ivy felt her tears rolling down her face. Why isn’t he crying, too?
“When I got here, I fell in love with the darkness because it mirrored the darkness inside me. And then I met Leseldh.”
Ivy began to feel a creeping sense of dread at the sound of their Sire’s name.
“Did he help you?” Ivy aimed for optimism, but it died when a bitter laugh burst from Finare’s lips.
“He ruined me. When Leseldh Created me, it erased my Rend.”
“But wait. If the Rend was erased, wouldn’t that mean you weren’t hurting anymore?” Ivy’s brow furrowed. The concept of the Rend was well beyond her comprehension, especially if the Fae considered such suffering to be a good thing.
“The Rend’s erasure brought me a different kind of pain.
My connection to my Mate is gone forever.
I feel nothing as a result. I know I loved him once, but I don’t feel it in my heart.
I don’t even feel the pain of his loss. I just feel…
empty.” Finare’s words sounded hollow. Understanding struck Ivy like a tidal wave.
“I’m so sorry, Finare.” Ivy’s words were soft, and they dissolved into a lasting silence. “So, you don’t think Vampires can have Mates… or Resonants?” Ivy glanced over the books surrounding her. Worry lined her features.
Finare’s expression softened. “Let’s say they could. I think it’d stand to reason that it’d work a little bit like with the Fae, right?”
Ivy nodded her agreement.
“Well, when Malia Ended, Leseldh should’ve suffered the Rend, or something similar. Which would mean that he shouldn’t be able to feel anything for you. But he absolutely does, which is where it gets confusing.”
Somehow, the concept of Leseldh being unable to feel for her seemed worse than the idea that Resonants didn’t exist at all. Ivy contemplated the implications of Finare’s words.
“In Oaris, Leseldh said to me that we’d confirm our bond soon.” Ivy’s admission made a chill run up her spine.
“Do you know what he means by that?” Finare’s expression turned wary as he peered at her.
“No clue. Hence the research.” Ivy gestured to the piles of books around her.
She knew Leseldh was holding something back about this ‘confirmation’, but she hesitated to broach the topic with him. She wasn’t sure whether it was fear of the answer, or of his reaction to the question. She decided it was simpler to try and find those answers on her own—or so she thought.
“I’m afraid to say, the lack of information only furthers my belief that Resonants are a myth,” Finare shrugged.
The airiness had returned to his tone, and the shadows in his eyes had receded. It was also clear he didn’t have anything more to say on the topic. She heaved a sigh and closed Night’s Ardour.
“Well, that was heavy, Finare. How about we go and get drunk?” She peered over at him, a devilish grin spreading across her lips.