Chapter Fifteen
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what I want to do with my life. I’ve not said anything to anyone, as this is something I need to figure out by myself. Hell, it’s why I came to Atlanta in the first place.
The good news is I think I’ve finally made a decision.
No, I have.
And I feel good about it—heart, soul, and mind.
Ever since I first arrived in town, I put everything on the back burner. That was fine…for a while. I was busy having fun flirting with and pursuing Nils.
But then shit got real with him. It was no longer fun and games. I’ve not only fallen for the man, I’m head over heels in love with him.
Only problem is, he doesn’t know.
I think he’s got it bad for me, too, but I’m not sure he feels as strongly as I do. I wish I could just ask him, but the truth is, I’m scared.
I’m even fearful to tell him I’ve made a decision on my future, which is that I’m staying in Atlanta.
I don’t want him to think it has anything to do with him, though it partly does. But I’d stay even if nothing had ever developed between us. I just want to be close to Arden and Willow. They’re family, and it soothes me to have them nearby.
But the most important reason I’ve made the decision to stay is because I like it here.
Atlanta feels like home.
I’m going to still pursue a career in law too.
I’ll obviously need to apply to law schools down here, so I’ll be taking one more semester off to get things in order.
Hopefully, I can start back next fall.
In the meantime, I’m keeping my jobs, including the one at Boots.
Thank goodness Nils has kept his word and hasn’t told a soul about me working there. I’ve also lucked out that no hockey players have come in while I’ve been working.
So Arden still doesn’t know.
I plan to keep it that way.
There is one other thing weighing on me, though. One uncertainty. I’m going to need to find a new place to live. I can’t stay with Nils at his house forever.
But what if I want to?
I actually do.
We get along so well, and I’m comfortable here.
There’s also that little thing that I’ve fallen for him.
There’s nothing I can do to change that, nor do I want to.
That’s why I need to talk to Nils soon. I’m not ready to lay my feelings on the line, but I should clue him in as to what my plans for the future are.
Maybe I’ll bring it up tonight after his game, or possibly before. Sammie has to work, and Willow is staying home, so I’m going alone.
Well, not really alone. I’ll be hitching a ride down to the arena with Nils. This way we can ride back to the house together after the game.
We’ve done it this way a few times before, and it works out nicely. First, why take two cars? And more importantly, Nils tells me driving home with me helps him decompress after the game. I enjoy hearing his inside perspective on how certain plays unfolded or went down, so that’s a plus.
As much as I know about hockey, I’ve learned even more from Nils.
But tonight, instead of hockey talk, I’ll let him know that I’ve decided on a direction for my future.
He’s probably been wondering, so I’m curious as to how he’ll respond.
I hope he’s happy, because I sure am.
My good mood continues as I spend the remainder of the afternoon getting ready for the game. I eat a light late lunch down in the kitchen, then head upstairs to change into jeans, sneakers, and a black-and-silver Thunder hoodie over a black V-neck tee.
When I’m heading back downstairs, Nils is walking in the front door.
“Hey,” I say, stopping on the bottom step. “How was lunch with Finn?”
“It was good,” he replies as he sets his key fob in the bowl on the stand in the entry hall. Chuckling as he looks me over, he says, “Someone is ready for the game.”
“You know it,” I retort.
I think about bringing up my decision now, but Nils looks tired.
Sure enough, he yawns and says, “I think I’m going to get in my pregame nap now. We’re still on for driving down to the arena together, right?”
“Yes.” I nod. “Definitely.”
“Cool.”
Nils heads toward the stairs to go up and take his nap, and I make my way to the kitchen to clean up from lunch.
Yeah, I never did clear the table.
I get my cleaning in and spend some time catching up on my phone. The next thing I know, Nils is padding into the kitchen, asking me if I’m ready to go.
“Yep.” I stand and stow my phone away in my jeans pocket. “Let’s go.”
On the way down to the game, we don’t have a lot to talk about, just some random chitchat. So I determine this is a good time to bring up my plans.
Looking over at Nils as his eyes remain on the road, I clear my throat and say, “Hey, I wanted to tell you something. You’re actually going to be the first to know.”
“Wow, okay. I’m honored.” Glancing over at me, he raises a brow. “What do you want to tell me?”
I blow out a breath, and then I announce, “I finally made a decision about my future.”
He coughs, like he’s surprised. “Whoa, no way, you did? Really? So, what did you decide?”
We’re at a red light, and this time when he looks at me, there’s a clear mix of excitement and trepidation in his expression. One thing for sure, he’s invested in what I’m about to say.
That makes me feel better about my decision.
Smiling at him, I say softly, “I’m staying in Atlanta.”
Nils breaks out into the biggest grin, one that is so genuine that it warms my heart.
“You are?” he asks quietly, like he needs to hear it again.
I nod and confirm, “Yes, I’m staying.”
“What about law school?”
“I’m still going to go, but I’ll need to apply to schools down here.”
The light turns green, and, still smiling big and wide, he hits the gas.
As he drives, I fill him in on more of the details. But I hold off on mentioning anything about moving out.
He doesn’t bring it up either.
I guess that’ll be a conversation for another day.
That’s fine. I’m enjoying how pleased he appears to be about my news.
As we near the arena, he slows and says, “This is really great, Ellie. I’m happy you’re staying. Like, I’m truly fucking over the moon.”
Wow.
My heart skips a beat.
Feeling more confident than I did before that I’ve absolutely made the right decision, I say, “You know what? I’m fucking over the moon that I’m staying too.”
And it’s no lie.
I am.