Chapter 31
Maeve
Eonian (adj) constant and indefinite; continuing forever
My mind was swimming in the ocean, waves crashing over me one after another with no land in sight.
My ears rang, and the chaos around me had become muffled like hands covering my ears, making it impossible to decipher a single word.
Sweat began to gather at the back of my neck, my face hot, my eyes heavy.
I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Everything was in slow motion, and I couldn’t see Orin.
The crowd closed in on me as the lights lowered.
I began to shove past people, not paying attention to who they were, as I couldn’t see them anyway. Everyone was a blur.
I was having a panic attack.
Where were the exit signs? Aren’t they supposed to be visible?
Why the fuck did I think I could handle this?
I was in no way ready for this, and all it took was one tiny whiff of cologne to send me into a spiral.
One whiff of the same cologne that slick-haired Italian bastard wore.
It was a mixture of metallic citrus, wet moss, and cheap cigarettes.
I felt like I was going to puke. Then, suddenly, I crashed into a tall, stocky guy.
He grabbed my shoulders, trying to steady me, but I started fighting him off.
My fist connected with his ribs, and he grunted before grabbing both sides of my face in his hands. I tried to fight him off again.
The sound of Orin yelling my name began to filter through the muffled ringing, and his face slowly started to come into focus.
Tears of relief began to stream down my face, followed by a shuddering sob.
I was thankful we were near the edge of the crowd and only a few people watched the scene.
I didn’t really care, though. I just wanted out of there.
Orin scooped me up, and I wrapped my arms around his neck and let him carry me out of the stadium.
There was an SUV with two other men waiting for us outside the exit, and Orin climbed into the back seat with me.
He didn’t loosen his hold on me. He only spoke once the entire drive.
“I’m right here, Maeve. You are safe,” he said, and I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t a comfort to hear, no matter how hard it was to believe.
It wasn’t until we were back home in my room that I finally raised my head to look at him.
I hadn’t spoken the entire way home. I wiped my face with my hands and pressed the heels of my palms into my eyes, attempting to push the headache away.
It was wishful thinking. My head was pounding.
Orin looked like he had been crying himself, his eyes bloodshot and puffy, but I hadn’t heard it.
He met my gaze, and the expression I saw there was both sorry and broken.
I pulled him in for a tight hug, not only because I needed one, but because I could see he needed it too.
After a while, he sat me on the bed before walking into my closet to grab something better to sleep in. He laid out a pair of pajama shorts and a t-shirt on the bed before leaving.
After tossing and turning for what seemed like hours, the daylight began to creep above the horizon.
Finally giving up on the idea of sleep, I walked into the bathroom, and I avoided looking at myself in the mirror.
I turned the shower on with the heat blazing, discarded my clothes in the hamper, and stepped into the scalding water.
I felt some of the tension slowly leave my body as if someone had poked a tiny hole in my skin with a pin, allowing the stress to trickle out drop by drop.
After I finally felt clean enough, I wrapped my hair in a towel and another around my body, then headed to the closet to find my workout gear.
I got dressed, put on my game face, and went downstairs to train with Lorcan.
Wrapping a ponytail around the end of my braid, I tossed it over my shoulder just as my feet hit the bottom step in the foyer.
I walked through the front door and began to jog, making my way to the training gym we had on the estate, where Lorcan usually trained me and everyone else.
He was probably up by now, so why not start early?
It was about ten minutes later when I finally walked through the doors, sweat already coating my skin, only to find the building empty. Odd.
I walked around, listening for any sign of life, and came up empty until I opened a door in the back.
Orin sat in a chair with headphones in, completely unaware of me.
He was watching something on the projector, and I sat and waited, trying to figure out exactly what it was.
Just when I realized who was in the video, Lorcan pulled me by the arm, yanking me out of the doorway with his hand over my mouth to stifle my surprised yelp.
He looked angry, the way a parent looks when you’re caught with your hand in the cookie jar.
“What are you doing?” Lorcan demanded in a harsh whisper.
“I couldn’t sleep,” I said, my voice sounding so unsure, even to me. “I wanted to see if we could start early. Last night… something happened, and I…” I trailed off, not sure what to say.
Lorcan let out a harsh breath, grabbing the back of his neck before meeting my eyes.
“I know,” he said simply, pausing as he looked to the room where Orin sat.
I looked too, and realized that the video was of him and his parents, before they were taken from us.
“He told me what happened,” Lorcan continued.
“He couldn’t sleep either. I think it’s time we switched up our strategy. Come with me.”
He began to walk to the staircase that led to another training room upstairs, which had sensory training equipment installed. I hated the room, but I knew it was time to bite the bullet and follow him without resistance. Last night was proof of that.
Once we reached the room, I paused at the doorway, my body momentarily stopping me in response to the impending panic that would soon ensue once I stepped in.
Lorcan waited behind me, letting me get my courage up.
I walked over to the chair in the center of the room and sat down, watching Lorcan as he took down the blindfold and rope from a hook on the wall.
My heart raced. I knew what was about to happen.
He walked over, a grave look on his face, and tied my hands behind me and my ankles to the chair legs.
The blindfold followed, and when he cut the lights, the darkness overtook me.
“Now. Free yourself.”
Fingers massaging my scalp pull me out of my slumber.
I take a deep breath, filling my lungs as I stretch out across the couch.
I open my eyes and see Callum staring back at me with an easy smile.
His fingers trace the lines of my face, landing on my bottom lip with his thumb.
His gaze settles there as he strokes it, back and forth.
I feel a grin pulling at the corners of my mouth, and suddenly his eyes flash with lust. I sit up just enough for his mouth to meet mine, and he palms my cheeks, deepening the kiss.
His tongue strokes mine, reminding me of what he’d done just last night in the shower.
I moan at the thought, and Callum growls huskily.
Suddenly, I hear someone clear their throat, and I break the kiss, turning my head to see Ronan standing in front of us, a shit-eating grin on his face. I’d almost forgotten that we weren’t alone on the plane.
“You know, Ro, there’s free porn you could get your rocks off to. Just clean up after yourself when you’re done in the bathroom,” I quip with a cheery tone, annoyed at his interruption. He laughs, shaking his head at me.
“Oh, sweet Maeve, I don’t need to watch when I live it on a daily basis,” he answers, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Ugh, you perv,” I say, rolling my eyes and turning back to Callum.“How long was I out?” I ask, brushing a stray hair off his forehead, only for it to fall back down seconds later.
“We slept for close to,” he says, pausing to look at his watch, “eight hours. Which means we slept through the worst of the turbulence. Only three hours until we land in Shannon,” he tells me, like it’s no big deal. Only it is a big deal.
I slept eight hours without a single nightmare.
Eight hours without waking up, without sweat coating my skin, eight hours with my head in his lap, keeping my mind at ease. I close my eyes to keep the tears at bay.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, his voice soft, pained. I can’t speak without a sob threatening to escape me. I shake my head and lean forward, wrapping my arms around his neck.
“That was the longest I’ve slept without a nightmare since…
since that night.” I don’t need to say anything else for him to understand.
His arms tighten around me, and we sit entangled like this for a few moments before I finally pull back, leaving my hands on his neck, my forehead pressed against his.
His hands settle on my hips, gripping me firmly.
“I love you, Maeve,” he says, his voice full of adoration.
“I love you, too, Cal,” I say softly. Just then, my stomach decided to ruin the moment and growl loudly. I hear Orin snicker from the front of the cabin. Cal and I chuckle at the timing. I stand up, pulling him up with me, and we join the guys at the little table they’re sitting at.
Cal presses a button, and a steward emerges from the front of the plane, carrying trays of food.
She sets it in front of us, and for a reheated meal, it certainly looks delicious.
I cut the steak and am surprised to find it perfectly cooked.
I moan as soon as it hits my tongue. Cal and the guys just laugh and look at each other as they stuff their own faces.
I roll my eyes and go back to eating, savoring every bite.
The moment I finish, the steward is back to clear our table, then returns with key lime pie.
Cal looks over with a grin, and I know he had the menu made just for me.
Ronan and Orin are talking animatedly, not paying us any attention.
I mouth, “You really do think of everything,” silently to Callum, and he winks at me.
Suddenly, we hear a thud from the back of the plane, and all of our heads jerk in that direction.
“What was that?” I ask. The guys grin at each other, taking pleasure in the irritation painting my face. Ronan and Callum chuckle and walk to the back, opening the door to the private quarters and sliding in before I can get a good look.
“Care to let me in on the secret?” I ask Orin incredulously.
“It’s a surprise,” he says, his tone amused and menacing. I roll my eyes, but I realize I need to take the moment alone with him to ask him something.
“Orin,” I say gravely, and he sits up straighter, concern masking his features. “When was the last time I went more than four hours without a nightmare?”
Realization dawns on his face. “Almost six years,” he says, speaking low, slumping into his seat. He’s still beating himself up for that night. “I didn’t even realize you’d been asleep that long. With Cal and Roan here, the threats are at an all-time low, so I didn’t think about it too much.”
“I just hope it wasn’t a fluke and I can sleep through the night again,” I say, watching the clouds beneath us, and I can’t help but think that they match what I’m feeling in this moment: a false sense of security.
The clouds look soft and gentle, like they would provide the smoothest landing.
But in reality, they would part if I fell into them, and I’d plummet to my death.
Suddenly, I’m aware that Cal is again sitting next to me, smiling as he wipes… blood… off of his hands with a handkerchief. What the hell?
“Don’t worry, it’s not mine,” he says with a wink. My mouth falls open, and I turn to Ronan, who is sitting in his seat, another shit-eating grin on his face. I’m about to start questioning them when one of the stewards comes into the cabin, letting us know we are preparing for landing.
Cal and I make it to our seats and secure our seatbelts, and the guys do the same.
I reach for Cal’s hand, intertwining our fingers as I feel my anxiety slowly rise.
Less than twenty minutes later, the plane begins to descend, and my back is pressing into the seat so tightly that I might become one with it.
But we land without any complications, and once the plane slows on the tarmac, I feel the tension begin to seep out of my muscles.
We all gather our carry-ons and exit the plane, thanking the crew as we go.
As I descend the stairs, a cold wind whips my hair around my face, and I look up to see watery sunshine filtering down through sparse clouds. Hello, Ireland.
A few yards away is a red-haired woman, just a touch shorter than me, leaning against one of the three blacked-out Rovers.
She’s dressed in a white t-shirt, a dark leather jacket, a pair of distressed jeans, and a well-worn pair of combat boots.
She’s chewing a piece of gum, making little popping sounds as she works it between her teeth.
She seems rugged, edgy. I think she and I will get along just fine.
“Maeve, this is Saoirse, my cousin,” Cal says, extending his hand towards Saoirse. “Saoirse, this is my…” he trails off thoughtfully, then simply says, “Maeve.”
I smile at his awkwardness, then shake Saoirse’s hand. “Nice to meet you,” I say.
“A pleasure,” Saoirse answers, her smile dimming slightly as Ronan walks up. She stands a little taller, her posture looking tense.
“Sersch, how ya doing, dollface?” Ronan drawls smoothly.
“For fuck’s sake, Ronan, keep it in your pants, will yeh?
” She groans, annoyed. She looks back at me as if to say, “Men, amirite?” Then, she opens the driver's door and climbs in. I look at Cal, biting my lower lip to keep the laughter in, and he shrugs his shoulders before opening the back door, allowing me to slide in first. Orin slides in next to me while Ronan takes his spot in the front next to Saoirse, and based on the way she’s massaging her temples, she knows his antics are coming.
I can’t say I don’t understand because, let’s face it, it's Ronan.
“Welcome to Ireland, Maeve,” she mumbles flatly before pulling out of the airport and beginning the drive to the train station.
Shannon is beautiful. I watch it pass by in blurs of green, but I can’t wait to see what the rest of this country has in store for us. I lean my head on Cal’s shoulder, sighing in relief. In response, he places a lingering kiss on the top of my head.
Next stop, Limerick.