Chapter 17 #2
Bella was getting wiggly in my arms. She’d managed to cover me with sand.
“Trust me, Tim. You’re not interfering. Please make yourself at home.
The kitchen is just down the hall. Hudson would want you to grab a drink.
It’s brutally hot outside. You did me a favor.
More than that. You saved…” I tried to laugh it off since I had Bella in my arms. “Anyway, there are sodas and bottled water. I’ll be right back after I clean this little monkey up.
” I tickled her tummy again until she giggled.
He nodded, still uncomfortable. Maybe I was breaking another set of rules. I might as well continue with the streak. “She’s fine, Ms. Sciascia. No harm. Just a little girl exploring her boundaries. Right, Bella?”
She peered at him sheepishly.
“Come on, you. Let’s get you cleaned up so we can have a snack. What do you say?”
“Yay, Mommy.”
I whisked her from the room, still taking sharp breaths.
After washing away the sand, I pulled the big fluffy towel around her shoulders even though doing so wasn’t needed. “You worried Mommy.”
“I did?”
“You left the house without telling me. That made Mommy sad.”
While I was obviously jaded, I couldn’t help but think my sweet little girl was the kindest in the world.
She never liked to make anyone unhappy. My eyes filled with tears again.
Sniffing them away, I rubbed her face before removing the towel.
“Why don’t you head to the kitchen. I’ll be right there. Maybe some cheese and crackers.”
Her little clap was another hard punch in the gut. After she ran out, I slumped down against the bathroom vanity. If anything ever happened to my daughter, I couldn’t make it any longer.
Now I understood Hudson’s insistence. I’d seen the haunted expression in his eyes every time he looked at Bella. Maybe the sadness had something to do with the death of his sister. If so, why did I feel like he’d lived through another nightmare?
His care about my daughter was nothing I’d expected, although I was no longer certain what that was.
To some men, like my ex, children were a burden.
To Hudson they seemed the most special little creations on the earth.
While he hadn’t interacted much with her, his protectiveness allowed me to see another side of him.
I dropped my head into my hands briefly before wiping my eyes. Crying wasn’t going to do me any good. I needed to regroup and hold tight. Maybe this would all be over soon. Maybe Hudson would find a way to send Jacob Jones back to prison.
What if that wasn’t enough? What if the cartel he worked for came after me for revenge? There were too many what-ifs that I had no answer to.
“Enough,” I hissed as I stood. Time for my daughter to have a snack.
That’s what normal mothers would do.
Maybe normal wasn’t possible in my world any longer.
A hawk.
That’s what I felt like. Even as Bella had munched on cheese, my eyes never left her. She’d entertained Tim, who’d stood by the kitchen door where he could see outside. Every so often, he’d checked the security cameras, ensuring we were completely alone.
“You’re good at what you do,” I told him after sliding her plate into the dishwasher. I’d put her down for a nap, which gave me time to breathe and to calm my nerves. When I turned around, I had a direct view of the living room and the little mop of hair on my daughter.
Tim shrugged. “I enjoy being a cop.”
“How do you know Hudson? Judge Armstrong?” I had no idea what Tim had been told, but I doubted Hudson wanted to shout out to the world that we’d become romantically involved.
Although I wasn’t honestly certain what to call the relationship the handsome man and I were engaging in. I could admit everything was complicated.
“I met him years ago when he was an attorney and I was a rookie. I botched an arrest, although that wasn’t discovered until the case had reached trial. I didn’t need my commander to chew me a new one. Judge Armstrong did it for me.” He half laughed.
“What did he do?”
“After berating me for a full thirty minutes, he forced me to look at pictures of victims where the system had failed because of quote ‘shit like what I’d done.’” He grinned, shaking his head as if the memory was a good one.
“Ouch.”
“Yeah. My commanding officer let me off with a slap on the wrist after hearing what Judge Armstrong had done. I’ll tell you this.
I never made the mistake again. He’s one hell of a man and the best judge in this city.
Fair. Honest. Yet don’t cross him or come into his courtroom more than once.
Especially if he gave you any break in your sentence whatsoever. ”
“That tough, huh?”
His eyes clouded over. “You have to be these days. Criminals are constantly getting away with shit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t curse in front of you.”
“I don’t know why everyone thinks I’m some innocent girl. I’ve been around the block more than once.”
He laughed and took a sip of his bottled water. “The law has changed and people like the judge are rare. There are so many loopholes. So many criminals getting off because of slick attorneys.”
“Including Hudson?”
“Oh, God. No. As a prosecutor he was as down and dirty as they come in the right way. He didn’t mind getting in the trenches, more so than the detectives did.
You know, getting his hands dirty in searching for evidence.
He solved many a murder case through grit and determination.
That’s why I know how hard Mr. Jones’ release hit him. ”
“Do you think Judge Armstrong would ever cross the line to ensure a criminal is apprehended?”
Tim was suddenly uncomfortable, shifting back and forth where he stood leaning against the counter.
“I won’t tell a soul what you and I talked about.”
“I don’t like speaking out of turn about anyone, but I will tell you that right now, it’s like we need a crusader in the system.”
“How so?”
“Someone willing to take the extra step in ensuring these criminals don’t have more rights than victims. Just the other day I took a call.
I’d been to the house a few times for domestic abuse.
I convinced her to get a restraining order.
I’d heard from her attorney she was getting her life back on track. ”
“What happened?” The story was eerily similar to mine.
He shook his head and the same look of sadness shifted his focus. The same look I’d seen in Hudson’s eyes a dozen times. “A week or so later, I took another call from her address. When I got to the house she was…”
“Dead.”
“Yes. Her husband was standing over her with a knife. Even worse, their two-year-old daughter was in the highchair. She’d seen the whole thing.
Trust me, Ms. Sciascia, we’ve all seen things that would make you sick inside.
And we can’t do anything about it. Like I said, if there was someone who could move past that line you mentioned, I’d be all for it.
But please don’t tell the judge I said so. ”
“Not a word.” I thought about what Hudson had said to me and the anger I’d seen when he’d talked about the Undertaker. I’d witnessed his fisted hands and clenched jaw to the point he’d been grinding his teeth.
Then I’d seen the blood. And his bruised knuckles.
He’d already crossed the line. And the truth was that him doing so made me very happy.
We were both thoughtful and I was willing to accept something that had changed within Hudson, years in the making.
His willingness to cross the line hadn’t been brought on by a single incident but by several, maybe dozens where he’d been unable to perform his duties in relation to the right and wrong as outlined in the laws.
“Something occurred that was more personal for Judge Armstrong.” I wasn’t necessarily asking for confirmation. I was merely thinking out loud.
Yet as soon as I did, I sensed Tim was more uncomfortable than before.
“I doubt there’s anyone in any division of law enforcement who hasn’t been affected personally.
No, Judge Armstrong hasn’t been left unscarred.
Some just find their way into your very soul instead of being able to shove the horrible incident in a tidy box. ”
My silence was meant to encourage him to continue.
His sigh was deeper, the weight of his job and his conscience a heavy burden. I couldn’t imagine what he’d seen or experienced.
Or Hudson.
“When a woman and child is involved, it’s particularly painful. That’s all I can say, Ms. Sciascia. Just know Judge Armstrong is the type of man to do whatever it takes to right a wrong. That’s why he’d so respected.”
“I can understand why.” A woman and a child. Did his staunch need to protect me have something to do with his sister? Or another child and the mother? I shivered from the possibilities.
“I should get back outside.”
“Thank you again for everything.”
Tim tipped his head. “No problem. Just so you know. The judge thinks very highly of you. He’s never personally protected anyone. You must be pretty special.”
“You’re very sweet.”
As he walked away, I took a deep breath, missing Hudson more than I had a right to.
If truth be told, I was falling in love with the man.
Something that couldn’t happen.
We were two different people.