Chapter 7
From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
Dear Charlotte,
I’ve been meaning to call you, but between my hectic arrival, the process of settling in, and the time difference, it’s become almost impossible.
I figured I could send you a text, but emailing feels more fitting as it’s less limited and there’s no pressure for either of us to respond.
I hope you don’t mind that I stole your work email from your website.
How are you doing? Please give Shakespeare a kiss on his hairy head from me.
Riley
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From: Charlotte Norwich
To: Riley Amezcua
March 27th, 2026
11:23 PM
Dear Riley,
You booked an appointment with me through my website and showed up at my house, and now you’re worried about using my email address? It’s a little late for that, isn’t it?
I’m glad to know you’re still alive. What's been hectic about your arrival?
Everything’s going smoothly here. I managed to stop Shake from staging a coup on the household yesterday. He says hi.
Charlotte
P.S. Are we pen pals now?
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From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
March 29th, 2026
7:54 AM
Dear Charlotte,
I’m not surprised Lieutenant Shake has gone on a violent streak after I’ve left the country. I wouldn’t assume that was his last attempt if I were you. He sensed my absence and became unstoppable. Good for him.
When I arrived here early Tuesday morning, I was supposed to be picked up at the airport to be taken to my apartment. Turns out something had gone wrong, and the apartment wasn’t ready. They put me in a hotel for now, but I’m not complaining. It’s really fucking fancy.
You wanna call it pen pals? Sure. I was thinking more of a teacher-student situation, as I promised to give you a crash course in lesbianism 101. We might not be able to Zoom often, but I’m hoping this will do. Just PLEASE don’t go all lawyer-tone on me again, okay?
Riley
From: Charlotte Norwich
To: Riley Amezcua
March 29th, 2026
9:15 PM
Dear Riley,
How interesting. We haven’t even really discussed the terms yet, and you’re already suggesting role play?! I had no idea you had a kinky side. But yeah, I’ll totally sign up for your crash course. Promise to be a good student.
I’m sorry to hear you had a rough start over there. Must be even worse figuring that shit out with raging jet lag. Have you started working on your project yet?
Oh, and by the way, when I interrogated Shake after another attempt earlier today, he told me he actually works for you now. So. Explain that, General Amezcua.
Charlotte
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From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
April 2nd, 2026
10:22 AM
Dear Charlotte,
Sorry, it’s been a while. I’ve attached a photo of my hotel room to make up for it!
They were going to figure out how to get me into the apartment they initially rented for me, but I just got a message telling me I can stay in this room until the end of my project.
Fuck yeah!I’ve been going to the campus quite a lot, and it’s HUGE.
Also met my project partners and a few participants.
It’s overwhelming, but it feels good to be here.
It’s funny you mentioned my kinks. I wasn’t gonna go there until at least the 7th lesson, but I can definitely skip the rest and introduce you to all the possibilities. And yeah, you better be a good student.
When it comes to any bullshit Shaky is making up about me—I plead the fifth. You can prove NOTHING.
Riley
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From: Charlotte Norwich
To: Riley Amezcua
April 2nd, 2026
9:21 PM
Dear Riley,
Please don’t apologize for taking your time. I know you’re busy and I trust you’ll just message me when it’s convenient for you. Just like you meant it to be. The room looks fabulous! I can’t help but be a little jealous. I bet you sleep on that king size mattress splayed out like a starfish?
About your lesson plan—let’s actually just start with the first one.
Maybe some idioms, traditions, rules? I know Gabi has a doormat in the shape of a rainbow, but when I asked her about it, she said that it isn't mandatory to acquire the queer membership card.
I was scared to ask her any more questions.
You can try to save your own ass from Shaky’s betrayal all you want, but I actually just found his ear piece. You’re fucked.
Charlotte
From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
April 3rd, 2026
10:18 AM
Dear Charlie,
I knew I shouldn’t have underestimated your detective skills. I still own up to nothing though, you’ll have to torture a confession out of me. And as we both know, I’m pretty fucking tough.
Yes to the starfish, by the way. But only when I sleep alone.
Do you have time for a Zoom on the 5th? I have some free time around my 7.00 PM, your 1.00 PM. Let me know if that works?
Riley
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From: Charlotte Norwich
To: Riley Amezcua
April 3rd, 2026
7:34 PM
Dear Riley,
Thanks for the laughs— you, ‘fucking tough’? When I close my eyes, I can still hear you scream from when you fell in a little bit of cold water. Forgive me for not thinking that you won’t be that hard to crack.
Sunday works. Talk to you soon.
CHARLOTTE
From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
April 8th, 2026
12:54 PM
Hey Charles,
It was really nice to talk to you live last Sunday. And you’re right, it’s weird how a little bit of distance can make things feel way more personal. I don’t mind it, though, because you keep proving me wrong thinking you had such a stick up your ass before. Kidding. Or am I?
I’ve been thinking about what you said, and it’s so fair to be intimidated by the idea of being physical with a woman.
It would be weird if you weren’t. I was too.
It’s scary to explore your sexuality as a teenager, but it might be even more scary at a later age.
Thank you for sharing those worries with me.
I so respect how difficult that is for you.
How about you just… get out there? Go for some drinks, find a woman who looks appealing to you, and find out what happens when you kiss her. The math’s pretty simple once you get there. Recoiling = bad. Wet panties = good. There are no rules. If you want to stop, you stop.
As promised, I’ve attached a list of movies for you to watch. No need to watch them all at once, but you’ll realize pretty soon what we mean by ‘stop burying the gays’. I’ve included some with happy endings too.
x Riley
P.S. If you do go out there, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.
P.P.S. We should talk about Mexico soon.
P.P.P.S. You should start preparing for your midterms. I’ll quiz you next time.
From: Charlotte Norwich
To: Riley Amezcua
April 9th, 2026
8:21 PM
Riley,
If you address me like that one more time I’m personally moving up the date of Gabi and Lou’s wedding without telling you. This is my final warning.
Anyway, now that that’s settled: thank you for being so understanding. I know I must sound ridiculous to you sometimes, and I know you make a huge effort to put up with my bullshit. I’m ready for my midterms, let’s hear it!
Don’t worry, I won’t do anything you wouldn’t do. I also wouldn’t do anything you WOULD do, because you can be a freaking pervert sometimes. Perv.
But yeah, I suppose I should put myself out there. I’ve been waiting for someone who promised she’d court me, but she seems like a bit of a coward now and is a couple of thousand miles away from here. So. I’ve signed up for a dating app. Here goes nothing.
Also yes, let’s talk Mexico in our next Zoom. I have a lot of ideas already (not).
x Charlotte (that’s spelled C-H-A-R-L-O-T-T-E)
From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
April 13th, 2026
6:17 AM
Dear Charlie, Char, King Charles,
Sorry, it’s been a while again. We’ve had quite a few rough days on our project. The athletics team on campus has been so kind and open to let me join their team for as long as I’m here, which helps me take my mind off of things—but a message from you also cheers me up, so thanks.
I’m proud of you for joining a dating app! Send me a screenshot of your profile?
Alright, here’s your quiz:
1) Name three things you can wear to let other lesbians know you’re on their team.
2) How long does the average first time sex session last?
3) What does it mean when a woman shows up at your house with a backpack?
Bonus) What’s a praise that will make most lesbians weak in the knees?
So excited to see what you make of this.
x Riley
P.S. You call me a coward for not courting you.
You also call me a perv. One of these days, my dear, sweet, Charlotte, you’ll realize I’ve been doing nothing BUT court you.
You may not see it now, but I’m not trying to get into your pants before getting into your mind and soul.
On top of that, I know how important it can be to give space and let you explore.
But mostly, I’m just a hopeless romantic.
Not a conventional one, but in my own way, as you’re well aware of by now.
From: Charlotte Norwich
To: Riley Amezcua
April 14th, 2026
11:58 PM
Riley,
You’re apologizing for the wrong thing, dear. Again—no apology needed for taking your time. You’re going to be begging for my forgiveness if you keep using those nicknames, however.
Giving your quiz a shot:
1) A pride pin, a carabiner, and a thumb ring.
2) Isn’t that supposed to be hours, not minutes?
3) She wants to sleep over?
Bonus) ???
Let me know if I pass.
I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been going through a rough patch. Is there anything I can do to help? Want to share anything about it? I can only imagine the kinds of conversations you must be having. But if I can be of support, I’d be so happy to.
x C
P.S. I’ve attached a screenshot of my profile, what do you think?
From: Riley Amezcua
To: Charlotte Norwich
April 16th, 2026
8:27 AM
Dear, sweet Charlotte,
I do not beg, but if I beg, it will be for entirely different reasons. I’m sure you can figure that one out by yourself.
Are you up for our wedding-prep Zoom soon? How’s this Sunday 4pm (my 10pm)?