40. Fuck My Life
Chapter forty
Fuck My Life
Owen
I’ve left Charlie in bed. I hated leaving her wrapped in the thick quilt. I wanted to be the one wrapped around her, but I need to talk to the guys about what’s going to happen next. What we have and how we can take this prick down for good.
The kitchen is quiet when I walk in. Cole’s making a round of drinks, so I add my mug to the line-up.
“Where is everyone?”
Smiling at me, he sets my cup under the machine and slides in my favourite coffee pod, pressing the button to start before he turns to me.
“After we all watched you drag Charlie upstairs, Millie and Jack went to rest in one of the rooms, so did Dom and Harley.” Handing me my now full cup of coffee, he adds, “Xander left. He said he’s got plans for this organisation and to keep him updated on what we plan to do.”
Lifting the cup, I groan at the fist sip, hot and bitter on my tongue. I place another cup in the queue for Charlie.
“Leon and Zan have been scoping out the property from the satellite system and getting the floor plans, that are all currently laid out on the dining table, sorting out entry and exit points, and a plan of action. Ethan’s playing with his new toys downstairs.” I presume he means the men from the van. “He’s been there a while. I’ve been watching on the live feed. Fuck, he enjoys this shit.”
“That he does. Has he got anything from them?” Shaking his head, he pops another cup under the machine as it whirrs to life.
“No, basic information, not privy to anything higher up. We’ll deliver them to the station when he’s done.”
“Shame, we could use some good intel right about now.”
“Speaking of intel, Grey found out about the explosives lock up. He’s determined to set something on fire. I’m sure that man has a problem.”
“He’ll openly admit it.” I laugh.
“How is she?” I forgot how close they have all become with Charlie in my absence.
“Fuck, man, she’s so… I don’t even know. Strong? In every sense of the word, she’s knackered, beat up, but it doesn’t seem to bother her. She seemed more worried about protecting everyone else. She’s still pissed off with me.” His brows pinch together in an attempt to hide his amusement. I can’t blame him.
“She is strong. I’m surprised you don’t have a black eye. I thought she would have kicked your ass by now.” I don’t tell him what she did when I ripped her away from those guys in the alley. He’ll only laugh harder.
“I would have let her if she wanted to. I talked to her on the way home. Told her everything. That I was sorry, and fuck… do you know what she said?” Shaking his head, he frowns slightly. “She said, I don’t need to be sorry, that she understands. Fuck. Cole… she’s everything. I told her that I’d do anything to have her back in my life, that she’s it for me.”
I can see the shock on his face. I’m not normally this open, especially about personal matters.
“She just said, okay.” His mouth is fully open now, gaping actually. “I know. I was expecting a fight. I was prepared to beg, grovel, and wait as long as it took. She wants it all as much as I do. No fights, no arguments, just lots and lots of—”
“I don’t want to hear whatever was going come out of your mouth. She’s like a sister to me.”
An hour later, the sun is just starting to set outside. We have a plan, but it’s not the best. I’ve made sure it only involves the guys from Cerberus. I don’t want anyone else getting any deeper in this if we can help it.
“We just go in there and see what we can find?” Ethan looks at me and I nod. “Is that the best we can really come up with? It’s total shit and we all know it.”
“It’s the only way we have if we want this to end. If we want Charlie to be safe again,” Leon adds.
“Are you all really planning on doing this without me?” Turning around, Charlie is leaning against the wall, watching us. She’s not happy.
“That’s not what we are doing. You can be involved, but we can’t let you get anywhere near there. It’s too risky. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if anything else happened to you.”
“Right.” She’s pissed off but calm. I have a feeling it's a lethal combination in Charlie. “So when you said you would be by my side, what you really meant is that I can sit at home and wait for you like a good girlfriend?” She called herself my girlfriend . I know that’s really not what I should take from what she just said, and I should really hide the smile that’s trying to take over my face, but I can’t help it.
“Are you fucking smirking at me?”
“I’m not smirking, Angel. It’s just you called yourself my girlfriend and you are so much more than that, but I fucking liked it anyway.”
When she steps forward, the last thing I was expecting was for her to kiss me. It’s brief and leaves me wanting more, but I know what’s she silently saying: thank you for being honest with her.
“I will never do as I’m told, nor will I stay at home, or wherever we are, and wait for you to come back to me. It’s never going to happen.” She’s calm and the fire in her eyes right now says she’s not backing down. “You have a lot to learn about me, Owen. Now, what I will do, however, is share with you why I was there this morning, and what my plan was, before you lot came in and dragged me away.”
Turning around, she sits on my lap, and all eyes now land on my beautiful girlfriend. No. that’s not going to work, she’s so much more. I think only wife will do. Yeah, that’s feels fucking right. Charlie Stone . Fuck yeah, that sounds good. “Your plan is shit and you know it is. Let me show you what I have.”
Over the next thirty minutes, Charlie shows us what she suspects to be the books, the holy grail of information on the comings and goings of the Summers’ organisation. Everything we had right under our nose, in almost every image we have of Mr Summers, it’s with him, a fucking laptop. An old as fuck laptop, that has no form of Wi-Fi connection. Cole tried and failed to hack it.
“I also have a feeling that if Mr Summers is the accountant. We’re missing who’s really in charge.”
“At this point, we only have one option to find out…” Dom offers
“We need to get that laptop,” Charlie says, still sitting in my lap. Fuck, I love that she’s here. And not just that she’s sat on me, but here with my brothers, as an equal to every single person in this room.
“That’s what I was sort of planning to do. In fact, I was planning to use the Wi-Fi device that was in Xander's truck and plant it on the laptop. I could hack it and get what we need.”
“You weren’t wrong when you said I had a lot to learn about you. Hacking, really?” I ask.
Kissing my cheek, she simply says, “Never underestimate me again, Owen Archie Stone.”
“Never again, Angel.” I whisper my promise.
Everyone else forgotten, Charlie's lips graze mine. Gripping the back of her neck, I press her lips to mine, taking it deeper, pressing myself into her. My dick strains against my zipper, ready and waiting to make her mine again. Charlie hums into my mouth and I growl in approval, until some rude fucker decides to cough, breaking our moment together.
I pull back, watching as her eyes flutter open. The haze she has right now… I want to keep her just like that: flushed, sexy, and wanting more.
“If you love birds are finished, we’d like to carry on,” Cole announces.
Turning slowly to face him, I reply, “One day, this will happen to you. Revenge is sweet.”
“Not happening. I’ll leave that for you two.” He smirks.
“Sorry, carry on.” Charlie gestures to Cole and tries to stand up, but I don’t let her move.
“If you stand up, everyone will be able to see just what you do to me.”
For added effect, I press myself into her, and she laughs the sweetest sound I have ever heard. Wriggling her beautiful ass over my dick to spur me on.
“Is that better for you?”
“Perfect,” I add, planting a kiss on her neck just where I know she loves it.
“No fucking way, absolutely not, not happening. I’ll fucking lock you away before I let you set foot back in that place, Charlie.” I know I’m being a dickhead, an absolute fucking moron, but how can I do this to her?
“I’m not asking you, Owen. I’m telling you, this is the best way.”
“No,” I yell.
“I need you to listen, and fucking listen carefully. I want to do this… No, I am doing this. Whether you agree or not, I’m going in there and causing the distraction while you guys do your thing and get the laptop.
“Angel, I can’t let you do this. It’s a death wish.” I know I’m choosing all the wrong words.
“You are not letting me do anything, Owen. I’m choosing to do this. They know who I am. I will be able to get them away from the office, or we can go with Ethan and Grey’s plan and just blow up a section of the building while we try and get the laptop. Either way, I’m coming with you.”
“We warned you about Praise last time you mentioned it. We had no idea at the time you knew more than you were letting on. She knows the risks, Owen.” Ethan glares at her like he doesn’t want this either, but hell if I know what I can do to stop her. She mouths ‘sorry’ at him and she gets the chin lift in return.
“Angel, I…” My voice betrays me when I try and say what’s on my mind. “I… Don’t know how to do this.” She comes over to where I’ve been pacing behind the table.
“Shit, baby, I can’t and won’t stand by and let you all finish what I started without me. I love you… all too much for that to happen.” Charlie admits.
I know I’m going to give in. I can’t seem to say no to this woman.
“I know you’re trying to protect me, but you need to understand that I don’t need your help. I need to trust that you will be there for me. I want… I need you by my side, to stand with me. No matter what.”
Fuck my life.
“Okay, Angel, I’m with you, by your side, no matter what.”
I’ve never heard a sound like it. She shrieks. Even with the dread that sits in my chest, it makes me smile that I’ve made her happy.
“Yes, dream team, baby!” she yells. I just hold her close, not knowing what dangers tomorrow will hold.
Walking into our room, I get undressed and sit on the edge of the bed, in just my boxers, waiting for Charlie. I have a little surprise for her. But I need to get my story out first. It’s been on my mind, and I want a clear head going into tomorrow. Giving her this final bit of me, it will help me lay my demons to rest, so I, we, can move forward.
“Now this is a sight I could get used to, you waiting on the bed for me.” Closing the door behind her, she comes to straddle my legs. I smile, kissing her softly.
“Angel, I feel like we skipped a whole section on us. Even coming back, we dived right in.” I tell her, pulling back slightly to see her beautiful face.
“I feel a ‘but’ coming on.” Tilting her head to the side, her brows pulling together in question.
“There's no but, when it comes to us, I want to tell you about my PTSD.” Letting out a breath, as Charlie sinks down next to me, her eyes roaming my face.
“Owen, you don’t need to tell me anything if you don’t want to.” Stroking her knee with the tips of my fingers, I want to comfort her, like she’s doing to me right now.
“I want to, Angel.” Bringing my hand to her cheek, I place a small kiss on her lips. Taking a steady breath in, I start at the beginning.
“Our last mission in the army went wrong, unbeknown to us, we had a traitor in our team, a man called Eli Mendez.” I can still see his face, the regret, fear, and pain in his words, as he told us the truth. “Myself, Leon, Ethan, and Cole were the only ones out of our unit to come out alive. There were ten of us that went in that day. Four days later, only the four of us came out.” I remember them all. My face falls at the memory. “We’d been assigned to actively take out some nasty fuckers, who had taken a village in the north of the country.” Sensing the shake in my voice, she places her soft warm hands in mine, knowing it’s going to be hard for me to do this.
“I’m here.” She reassures me, grounding me and urging me to carry on.
“When we arrived, we were ambushed, sitting ducks, and on our own. We lost two men that first day, horrifically in a shootout, followed by four the next. We tried our best to save them. Eli was shot on the first day. He admitted everything.” His betrayal cut deep. We all felt it. Four days of hell, no sleep, no rest, constantly under fire and being torched out of your hiding place. On the last day, it all went quiet. We managed to escape during the night, but we had to leave them behind.
“I felt like I had let everyone down. As their CO, they were mine to look out for, mine to keep safe, and mine to ensure they made it home to the people they loved. I failed at it all.”
Charlie sighs. I watch as her mouth opens, ready to say something. I jump in before she can. “I still feel the weight of what happened, but I understand now, there was nothing I could have done to prevent it.” talking helps.
“Shit, Owen, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you telling me this, opening up to me.” My gaze has been on our joined hands. A teardrop lands on my knuckles, my eyes shooting to hers, where I see her cheeks coated with tears.
“Don’t cry, Angel, I can’t stand it,” I say, kissing away the tears.
“I’m sorry, I just… that must have been so hard for you.”
“Not as hard as it used to be. I’m good now. I can see things a lot clearer than I used to. As much as it killed me to be away from you and the guys, I needed it. I regret how I did it, but I know I needed to do it.” Kissing her again. She holds my hand tight.
Grabbing the box I left beside me, I place it in her hands. Looking up, she looks right at me, her eyes filled with tears.
“This is for you, Angel.”
“What is it?” Her voice trembles as she runs her fingers over the blue velvet box.
“Open it and find out.” Hesitating for a moment, she spins the box in her hand. “Open the box, Angel.”
Biting her lip she flips the lid on the box. I watch as her eyes fill with tears, then shoot to meet mine when she realises what it is, her chest heaving as she gulps down a breath.
“My necklace.” tears slip down her cheeks again, only this time I let them fall, this look on her face right now. I know it’s a happy one.
“I thought I’d lost it, I thought it was gone forever, I never took it off once, I kept my promise to you.” Kissing her, she fumbles to get the necklace out of the box. Moving my hands, I place it around her neck, fastening it into place with ease.
“I know you did, Angel.”
“This is new…” she adds, admiring the back of the necklace. Her eyes light up seeing the new inscription.
No Matter What.
“Owen Archie Stone,” she stutters. “I tried my hardest not to love you, but you… you made it impossible.” This is everything I ever wanted, Charlie in my arms. Everything out in the open.
Holding the necklace in her hand, she pulls me towards her, taking my mouth with hers. I pull away, my breath on her lips. “Are you saying you love me, Charlie Hudson?”
“Yes, Owen, I’m saying, I have always been and I will always be yours, mind, body and soul.”
“Fuck, I love you with everything I have, Angel. I’m fucking yours for as long as you will have me.” Clutching her closer, breathing in everything that she is, taking her mouth with mine, swallowing the beautiful noise she's making, I kissing her with everything I have.
Never in my life will I get enough of the woman, “Owen, fuck me, then make love to me and never stop.”
I don’t, and never will.