36. Eva
TWO WEEKS LATER
It’s been two weeks since we rescued Axel from the warehouse, and ten days since he passed.
Mandy hasn’t left my side since his brothers broke the news to me that evening on the 21st of December at 10:15pm. She’s the only thing that feels somewhat real in my world right now. Her presence is a reminder that I’m not completely alone in this.
It’s been just over a month since I first met the Ashford brothers, and I never imagined my life would be what it is now. I never once thought I would feel so heavy and weighed down with the loss of someone I never expected to care about as deeply as I do.
I begged to see him one last time, but the doctors told me he passed due to the extent of his injuries and it would be too traumatic.
We found out that Marco and his men tortured his body by burning his skin, breaking his fingers and cutting so deep into his skin, he experienced extensive blood loss.
I can’t stop seeing the images of him slumped in that chair, barely alive, barely holding on.
The images haunt me when I try and sleep as different scenarios play out, every single one ending with him dying.
His brothers told me that Axel bought me a house. He never told me, never gave me any hint that he’d made such a decision. I found out the day after his death, when his brothers showed me the key.
They said it was his idea, his way of giving me a future, of making sure I had a place to call my own and to love.
I haven’t had the stomach to go see it yet and I don’t know if I ever will.
I curl up on the bed, drawing my legs tight to my chest as Mandy brings a bowl of food into my room.
“Eva, please,” She whispers, kneeling in front of me. She reaches out wrapping her hand in mine, stroking it slowly.
I don’t respond as I stare at the wall in front of me, listening to his voice inside of my head.
Maybe if I let him help me that day in the woods, none of this would have happened. I wouldn’t have been alone for Marco to find me, and Axel wouldn’t have gone after him.
Mandy sighs, “Eva, you can’t do this forever. You know that right?” She says softly.
I dont blink, I don’t move. Mandy’s voice is nothing but a distant hum. Her hand remains on mine for a few moments longer before she stands.
“I’ll be right back,” She says before retreating to the door.
I listen to the sound of the door opening and voices from the other side, asking if I’m okay.
“She hasn’t eaten anything, Flynn,” Mandy says, her voice sharp but trembling with concern. “Not even water today. I don’t know what else to do.”
The sound of Flynn’s rough voice follows, but I can’t make out his words.
“I think she’s shutting down,” Mandy says, louder this time. “This isn’t just grief, this is… I don’t even know how to explain it. She’s wasting away in front of us, and she doesn’t even care.”
“She’s grieving, Mandy.” Flynn replies, his voice sounding softer. “We all are. But maybe you’re right. Maybe we need to do something.”
I listen, waiting for someone to make a decision about my life.
“She won’t like it, but we need to take her to someone who can help. I think it’s time.”
Mandy hesitates, quickly glancing towards me before lowering her voice, “Do you think she’s ready?”
“She doesn’t have to like it,” Flynn says firmly. “But she’s going. We’ll make sure of it.”
I don’t hear Mandy’s voice again as footsteps grow closer.
“Eva, we’re going to take a drive, okay?” She says gently before stepping back to allow Flynn in front.
“Eva,” He says, his voice steady. “You’re coming with us. You don’t have to say anything, but you can’t stay here. Let us help you.”
I don’t react to their words as hands reach underneath me, lifting me gently into the air. I don’t resist as they carry me out of the room. Out of my only safe haven.
The car turns down a driveway that sparks a memory. It’s the house me and Mandy were requested to stay at during our case for Rachel. It all feels foreign to me now, like a place I don’t belong to anymore.
Axel has been here, the morning after they first took Mandy. When he appeared on my balcony in his mask. His presence has been in this house more than once.
Tears silently fall as Flynn and Mandy step out of the car before opening my side.
I don’t move until she reaches in, brushing her hand against mine as she removes my seatbelt. “Come on, Eva” she says softly. I use this moment to look at her, and when I do. I see the effect I’ve had on her. She looks tired, dark circles rest under her eyes from the lack of sleep she’s had from watching over me.
I nod, moving with her to step outside of the car. She looks up at me and smiles, a little bit of hope on her face from me walking by myself.
My legs feel heavy as I walk towards the front door. The first bit of movement I’ve had in weeks unless I needed the toilet but even then, Mandy has been by my side.
We follow Flynn through the front door to see Gunnar, Carter and Ant waiting at the bottom of the stairs, all their faces full of concern as they watch us intensely. Like they’re waiting to run and catch me if I fall. I can’t help but look at the floor, noticing the smashed vase has vanished, only to be replaced by a beautiful bunch of white roses, resting on the table.
Mandy’s hand slips into mine, her gentle tug breaking my focus on the roses. “Come on,” she murmurs softly. “Let’s go sit down.”
Following her lead, we make our way to the living room, it hasn’t changed a single bit since we were last here, the only difference being that it’s tidier now.
Mandy keeps her hand on mine, guiding me towards the sofa. The cushions feel soft as I sink into them and I pull my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them instantly.
Mandy stands there, watching me for a second before heading towards the kitchen, her footsteps fading behind her. Faint voices from the kitchen float into the living room, but I can’t make out the words. No doubt they’ve brought a Doctor here to sedate me and place me into a mental ward but in all honesty, if this was happening to Mandy, I would do it too.
I can’t help but think about the flowers sitting on the table in the hallway and wondering who would have placed them there.
Silence wraps around me like a heavy blanket, pressing against my chest. I trace patterns into the arm of the sofa to distract my mind from wandering.
Grief is a funny thing, everyone reacts differently. Some people push on through life, wishing the grief away. Others, like me, shut down completely no matter how hard they try.
When Axel was in the hospital, I prayed every day that he would be okay. I used to believe in hope. But all that was ripped away from me the day I saw the look on Flynn’s face.
I shut my eyes, trying to block out the world, trying to push away the constant loop of “What ifs” that run my thoughts. But even in the quiet, I can hear his voice, clear as day. “You’re stronger than this, Eva.”
I don’t stop the tears that fall, letting them run down my face and onto my clothes, it’s the only thing that feels real when I see the mark they leave.
The scrape of a chair in the kitchen catches my attention as Mandy’s footsteps grow louder. I glance up as she rounds the corner to crouch in front of me.
“Eva, there’s som-” She stops herself, like she’s choosing how to approach the subject, “There’s someone here to see you.”
I lift my head, ready for the Doctor to round the corner, but the voice that follows, was the last one I ever expected to hear.
“Hello, Buttercup”
The words hit me like a lightning bolt, freezing me to my spot on the sofa. I whip my head around to look behind me and there he is, standing just inches away.
Axel.
He’s alive.
My eyes widen, searching him for any indications that this is fake, that is some cruel trick my mind is playing with me. He stands there, wrapped in bandages, a fresh scar slicing his cheek as bruises scatter across his bare skin, but it’s him. It’s really fucking him.
“You’re… you’re alive,” I whisper, my voice cracking as the tears fall harder.
He takes a step towards me, his movements slow like he’s afraid I’ll run. “You really thought I would leave you buttercup? I’ll search heaven and hell to have you by my side.”
THE END… OR IS IT?