Chapter Fourteen
D ana and Levi had argued about whether she should be there when Levi brought Asher home. Dana won that argument and stayed home the first day and night to give the brothers private time. But Levi insisted she come over the following day as usual. She brought over the kitchen plans to ask for more details from Levi and Asher.
She found the two men in Levi’s den, and paused at the doorway when she heard her name mentioned.
“Dana DeLong? Isn’t that the same chick who shit on you way back?”
Perfect entrance line. “I think of it as more of a mutual shitting, don’t you, Levi?”
They both turned around to look at her.
“Definitely mutual,” Levi said, walking over to kiss her. He gave her a rueful smile and said, “Dana, meet my brother, Asher, who appears to have stepped in it.”
He gave her a charming smile and it really brought home his resemblance to Levi. “Sorry, didn’t know you were there.”
“Think nothing of it,” she said cheerfully. “Obviously, Levi told you about our past history.”
“Only a little. He didn’t mention that you were drop-dead gorgeous, though.”
She laughed. “Thanks, I think.”
Levi and Asher definitely resembled each other, though Asher was blonder and younger. She had no difficulty at all seeing Asher as an elite Special Forces soldier. Even seated he was imposing, his bearing military and his eyes sharp and seeing everything. From time to time another expression, one she assumed was from pain, crossed his face, but even that was stoic.
“Are those plans you have in your hand?” Levi asked, motioning to the rolled-up paper she held.
“Oh, yes. I have a few questions about the kitchen for Asher.”
“Spread the plans out on the table and we’ll go over them,” Levi said, motioning to the large table pushed against the wall.
Asher looked comfortable where he was. He wore his prosthesis and had a walker sitting beside him. She started to suggest she bring the plans over there but Levi caught her eye and shook his head. So she laid out the plans on the table and started asking questions when they came over.
“Do you plan to cook, Asher? Or will you predominately be using the refrigerator and some cupboards?”
He shook his head. “No cooking. In fact, like I told Levi, you don’t need to remodel the kitchen for me. ”
“Levi?”
“We’re still discussing it.”
“All right. But can I ask you a few things just in case?”
Asher shrugged. “Sure.”
She knew Levi had ordered and installed a new refrigerator so there was no need to mention that. She asked Asher a couple of other questions about the kitchen and then rolled up the papers. “Have you had a chance to see if there are any problems with your bathroom?”
“I took a shower this morning. Everything’s fine.”
“The cabinet and countertop heights are good?”
“Yes. They’re good for a wheelchair.”
“That was the plan. I’ve been told most amputees use a wheelchair at least part of the time. Particularly at night.”
“So I hear. What happens when I move out?”
“I’m sorry?”
“When I move out. What happens to all the modifications you made? Do you put everything back the way it was?”
She hadn’t been expecting that question, and from the look on Levi’s face, neither had he.
“You just got here,” Levi said. “Why the hell are you already talking about moving out?”
“Because I’ll have to sooner or later.”
“Why?”
“I can’t live with you forever, Levi. This is why I don’t think you should alter the kitchen.” He added, “Don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate all you and Dana have done to make my quarters accessible. But if you’d asked me I’d have told you not to do it and just let me make do.”
Levi stared at him, clearly completely taken aback.
“I’ll see you two later. I need to talk to the workmen.” And get herself out of this very uncomfortable situation. Unsurprisingly, neither one paid any attention when she left.
*
“What the hell, Asher?” Levi repeated. “Why are you talking about moving out?”
“I’m going to need my own place. And so are you. Not for a while, obviously, but once I can cope on my own. Or soon after that.”
It hadn’t even occurred to Levi that Asher might not want to live with him indefinitely. Yes, he’d had a hard time convincing his brother to move in with him in the first place but Levi had thought once Asher said yes, it was settled. “You don’t want to live with me?”
“I didn’t say that. But, Levi, I’ve been on my own for a long time. Just because I lost my leg doesn’t mean I’m incapable of taking care of myself.”
“I never said that. Or thought it either.”
“Didn’t you?” Asher asked, raising his eyebrows. “Look,” he continued, “it’s obvious you and Dana have something serious going on. I’ll be in the way. I’m already in the way. ”
“No, you’re not. Dana and I are just—” He hesitated, unsure how to classify their relationship.
“Having fun?” Asher finished for him. “Give me a break, Bro. I saw the way you two looked at each other.”
“We just got back together. We’re not—We’re taking it a day at a time.”
“If you say so.”
“We don’t have to talk about this now. You’ve only been here one night. Can’t we table this discussion until later?” Like, a long, long time from now.
“All right.” Asher was silent a moment, apparently struggling for words. “I don’t want to fuck up your life any more than I already have.”
“You haven’t fucked up my life. Why would you think you had?”
“Because I have. You spent the last few months since I was injured flying or driving to various hospitals. I know it’s impacted your work. Don’t try to pretend your work isn’t important to you. You don’t need the money but you need to work.”
Levi couldn’t argue with that assessment. He’d been totally miserable when he moved to Florida and discovered he couldn’t work there. He still wasn’t sure why. He only knew he couldn’t concentrate, couldn’t think about anything other than the chaos around him.
Asher continued, “On top of that, you remodeled your damn house to suit me. To make it easier on me. Don’t tell me that hasn’t been a disruption.”
“So? The rooms you’re in were just sitting there, doing nothing. It’s a big house with lots of space. And the disruption has been minimal. It only affected certain parts of the house, not my bedroom or the kitchen—so far, anyway. It hasn’t affected any room I use a lot.”
“Really? You don’t use this room? Your den?”
“All they did was widen the doorway and that didn’t take long at all. They didn’t do anything else.” He’d wondered about the bathroom but there simply hadn’t been time. “Besides, when I need to work I go out to my workroom. So no, it hasn’t been a bother at all.”
“What about the pool?”
“The pool? I renovated that not long after I moved in. I put in the beach access because I liked it, and other than getting a wheelchair ramp for the pool, that’s about all I did.”
“There never was any sense arguing with you.”
Levi grinned. “So why do you?”
“I don’t know. Hardheaded, I guess. I need to take off my leg,” Asher said, heading out the door. “When I get back I’ll play you in a game of pool.”
That was the end of that conversation. Probably just as well. Why talk about it now when it would be a while before Asher could reasonably think of moving out?
Several minutes later, Asher came back to the den in his wheelchair and they started a game. It shouldn’t have surprised Levi that Asher would still be great at pool. Levi was no slouch but Asher was in a whole other category. Being in a wheelchair hadn’t messed up his game. They played for a while and then, after the third time in a row that Asher beat him, Levi said, “I’m going to quit while I’m behind. You’ve been playing while you’ve been in the hospital, haven’t you?”
“Yeah. That and lifting weights. I tried watching TV but there was never anything on I wanted to watch.”
“I can understand that. I have that problem too. But I have a lot of movies we can watch.”
“Sounds good.”
*
Several days later Levi found Asher in his room, practicing walking with his new leg and using his crutches. Levi watched him a minute before he spoke. “You’re getting good with those.”
“Not good. Better. And it’s too damn slow,” Asher said.
It seemed pretty fast to Levi, since Asher had only had his prosthesis for a few weeks. But then, Levi didn’t have to learn to use a new leg. “What’s the next step?”
“You mean with aids?”
“Yeah. What do you use next?”
“Forearm crutches. Then a cane and then walking on my own. ”
“You found a new prosthetist and physical therapist, didn’t you?”
“Yeah, over in Last Stand. Which reminds me, there’s no reason I can’t drive there now. If you’ll lend me a car. That is, if you have an automatic.”
“Of course I have an automatic. You can use whichever one you want.”
“Thanks. I’ll get a car soon, but I haven’t really needed one until now.”
Levi stopped himself from offering one of his for Asher’s permanent use. It had been borne in on him that Asher needed his independence. Now more than ever. So he only said, “Fine. But in the meantime you’re welcome to use one of mine.”
“Okay. I have an appointment next week.”
“Have you found a veterans’ support group in the area?” He suspected the question might irritate Asher, but Levi thought it was important and Asher hadn’t been forthcoming about it.
“Not yet. And before you ask, yes, I’m looking.”
“Good. I came to ask if you’re sure you don’t want to go to the fall festival with Dana and me.” Every fall, the Scarecrow Festival in the Park took place on the third weekend in October and ran from Saturday morning through Saturday night. There was a contest for the best scarecrow, all the entries being displayed in the park. There were all sorts of activities for families. A petting zoo, pony rides and face painting for the kids. Live music, food and craft beer for the adults. The shops stayed open late and the street around the Square was only open to foot traffic. At night there was dancing in the streets to go with the live music and free samples of beer for the adults and root beer for the kids.
Asher glanced at Levi. “I’m sure. Thanks, though.”
“I’ll have my phone if you need me.”
“I won’t.”
“There’s food in the fridge.”
“I know.”
“If you—”
“Levi?” Asher asked cutting him off.
“Yeah?”
“Go away.”
“I’m going. But—”
“You’re driving me crazy. I’ll be fine.”
Levi laughed. “I guess I have been hovering a little.”
“Try a lot.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll see you later. We won’t be late.”
“Don’t come home early on my account.”
Shortly after that Levi left to drive to Dana’s. He planned to park in the Wildcat Tower’s parking garage and then they would walk to the park from there. He took the garage elevator down to the ground floor and called Dana to tell her to come down.
“Hi,” she said, exiting the elevator a few minutes later. She kissed him and added, “I take it Asher didn’t want to come?”
“No. In fact, he kicked me out. Said I was driving him crazy. Hovering. He says I’ve been hovering a lot.”
Dana bit her lip but said nothing.
“What? Do you think I’m hovering?”
“Yes.”
He stared at her. “What am I supposed to do? He still needs help whether he admits it or not.”
“Yes, and I imagine he’ll ask for help if he needs it. But, Levi, Asher is a grown man. He was a freaking Green Beret. He’s completely capable of taking care of himself in most cases. And when he’s not he’ll tell you.”
“He wouldn’t let me drive him to his appointments. He let me take him to the first one and then he said he wasn’t going to be any more of a pain in my butt than he had to be. He hired a college kid to drive him. But now that he’s found a prosthetist and physical therapist closer to Whiskey River he’s planning to drive himself.”
“He doesn’t want to impose on you.”
“He’s my brother. He’s not an imposition.”
“Are you worried about Asher driving himself?”
He thought about that. “No. He should be fine, especially since it’s only over to Last Stand.”
She took his hand and pulled him along with her to an unoccupied bench by Booze’s statue. “All right, then. What’s really going on?”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t know what to do to help him. Most of the time I don’t know how to reach him. The most he’s talked to me was when we argued about him moving out.”
“Maybe you’re expecting too much too soon.”
“Maybe.” He was silent, then finally blurted out his biggest fear. “Do you know how many veterans commit suicide every day?”
“Oh, Levi.” She put her hand on his arm and squeezed. “Of course you’re worried. But do you really think Asher is suicidal?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think so… No. But I do think he’s depressed. And if he was suicidal and I missed it, which I could, I’d never forgive myself. He’s so damn closed off.” He shook his head. “God, I don’t know what to do.”
“You need to find another support group for veterans’ families and friends.” When he started to deny it she held up a hand. “Don’t give me the ‘I’m not a group sharing kind of guy’ excuse. Do you want to help Asher?”
“You know I do.”
“Then get over yourself and try another group. It won’t hurt and it just might help.”
Damn. He hated to admit it but she was right. “You’re really tough.”
“When necessary. You can start looking tomorrow. Now, let’s go have fun. First I want to vote on the scarecrows. Then I want to go to the petting zoo.”
“The petting zoo? Isn’t that for kids? ”
“I didn’t see anything about no adults allowed. It’s for anyone who wants to pet the cute animals. And I do.”
“All right. Lead on.”
At the scarecrow exhibit they ran into Harlan and Savannah. “Where’s that precious baby of yours?” Dana asked after they all greeted each other.
“Liam is with my parents,” Harlan said. “They came into town to see everyone. Especially their first grandchild,” he added with a grin. “We’re not staying long. Mommy here is anxious to get back.”
“As if you’re not,” Savannah said.
“Do you have pictures?”
Savannah laughed. “What do you think?” She pulled out her phone and began to show them pictures.
Dana oohed and ahhed and got that look on her face that a lot of women get whenever the subject of babies comes up. To Levi he just looked like a baby. A pretty baby but he couldn’t see any resemblance to either Harlan or Savannah or honestly, anything unique about him either. Apparently Dana did. “Oh, he has Harlan’s eyes,” she said.
Savannah scrolled through more pictures, making Levi wonder how many pictures you could take of one baby in a two-week period.
“I know. I think so too. But Harlan says he looks like me.” Savannah and Dana huddled over the phone, laughing and exclaiming how cute the baby was.
Levi shot Harlan a glance. Harlan shrugged, as if to say, “ I don’t see it either, but what are you gonna do?”
Eventually Harlan and Savannah left and Levi and Dana made their votes. There was everything from traditional scarecrows to ones that looked like space aliens, to one that looked like Frankenstein, to cartoon characters.
“I can’t believe you voted for that one,” Dana said, pointing at the one he’d chosen.
“Why? She’s great.”
“It looks like Jessica Rabbit.”
“I always liked Jessica Rabbit.”
“You just like it because it has boobs.”
“Yeah.” He grinned. “I like boobs.”
Dana laughed. “You are such a guy.”
“Guilty. And I hate to say it, but the one you picked is boring.”
“No, it’s not. Mine is a classic.”
“You say classic, I say boring.”
From there they went to the petting zoo. Which was more fun than Levi had imagined. There were sheep, goats, llamas, guinea pigs, pigs and various other animals.
Dana’s favorite was the miniature donkey. “He’s so cute. I want to take him home.”
“I’m not even sure your apartment complex allows dogs and cats. I seriously doubt they would okay a miniature donkey.”
She sent him a sly look. “No, but you could keep one.”
“Dana, I love you but I’m not keeping a miniature donkey at my house.” The minute he said it he realized it was true. And also that he hadn’t meant to say it.
Dana stared at him. “Do you really?”
Shit. What could he do now but admit it? Here, in a smelly petting zoo with a miniature donkey between them. “Yes. But this isn’t exactly the spot I would have chosen to tell you I loved you.”
“Why not? It’s perfect.” She came around the donkey and threw her arms around his neck. “I love you too,” she said and kissed him.
Applause broke out and they pulled apart.
“Better save it for later,” Dana said, laughing.
“I’m still not getting a donkey. Not even a miniature one.”
She didn’t say anything but the smile she gave him worried him.