Chapter 23
twenty-three
Chance had gone searching for escape in the Red Dog. There were no memories of Cordy there, so it had seemed the perfect choice.
Everything was exactly as he remembered, down to the scuffed-up pool table, mangy carpet, and cheap draft beer. So when he settled into his regular spot, Chance expected things to happen as they always had. He’d nurse his beer and talk to whoever he knew. And then he’d get to talking to a lady looking for a temporary escape, the same as he was. Maybe they’d leave together, maybe they wouldn’t, but they’d have a good time no matter what. They’d forget their troubles for a few hours.
That wasn’t what happened.
Chance found himself ordering a glass of water instead of a beer. He did manage to make his way to his usual booth, but when his friends came crowding in with him, he couldn’t relax. Oblivion wouldn’t come because his brain wouldn’t let go of Cordy.
She knew what he was like. He’d warned her, yet he still felt like he’d let her down. He must have hurt her, disappearing without a word this morning.
Damn it all, he never wanted to hurt anyone, but especially not her. This was what happened when Chance bent his rules about sleeping with women—things got messy.
He thought of Cordy, wondering what she might be doing while Tessa Hansen was chatting into his ear. About what, Chance couldn’t have said because he couldn’t pay attention.
Eventually, Tessa stomped off, telling him with a sneer to enjoy his water.
Chance sat there alone, staring at nothing.
And then Cordy blazed in, seizing his focus like she’d grabbed his face with one hand.
When she’d announced that she was in labor, he knew he’d been an ass. And a fool and a yellow-bellied coward. He never should have left her side.
But he had, and Chance knew it would take a lot to make this up to her.
So he went after her, making the hour-long drive to the hospital in half the time.
As Chance raced through the corridors, hoping he wasn’t too late, he went through everything they’d learned in the labor class. The squats, what pain meds she could get, how to wrap up the baby like a burrito.
And he couldn’t stop thinking about what could go wrong. Those nightmares felt too close right now.
He almost passed labor and delivery, had to hit the brakes and take two steps back. “Cordelia Grace Johnson?” Chance panted to the nurse behind the desk. “What room is she in?”
The nurse seemed to move in slow motion as she checked her computer. “Let’s see,” she muttered to herself. “Where did they put her? I saw her come in.”
“Is she okay?”
The nurse glanced up at him. “This your first time, Dad?”
The word Dad hit Chance like a kick from a horse. He didn’t even know what to say. No, he wasn’t the father… but then what the hell was he doing here in the hospital, going out of his mind wondering what was happening with Cordy and the baby?
“Yeah,” he said slowly. “I guess I’m keyed up.”
“Room 741,” the nurse said with a final keyboard tap. “Let’s get your ID band on and send you down there.”
She tagged Chance with a wristband that labeled him as belonging to Cordelia G. Johnson. He supposed he couldn’t argue with that.
The hospital corridor was freezing, and the scent of disinfectant clung to everything. There was the ever-present whir of electronics and the occasional beep that couldn’t be good. He felt like he was walking into a horror movie. If he didn’t walk back out of here with Cordy and a healthy baby…
He almost went to his knees. The pain from that caught him so hard and quick it was like being sucker punched. Chance grit his teeth and kept walking. Cordy needed him.
No more thinking about what could go wrong. He was done with that. His focus would only be on her and getting her and the baby safely through this.
When he got to room 741, he paused and took a breath. Everything would change once he walked into that room. Chance couldn’t explain how, but he knew it was true. At this moment, he was in the before . When he stepped inside, he’d be in the now .
“I’m ready,” he said quietly to himself.
Then he walked in.
Ruby was right there by the door. She caught his arm before he crossed the threshold and pulled him into the hallway.
“You came.”
There was nothing Chance could say to justify what an ass he’d been, so he only nodded. “Thanks for bringing her here.”
“Chance.” Ruby’s fingers tightened. “Don’t fuck this up.”
“The labor? It’s not up to?—”
“Not that.” Her gaze pierced him. “You know what I mean. This is it—don’t let your father or whatever you think you should be ruin this. She’s too special.”
“I won’t.” He said it as solemnly as a vow. “I know I had my head up my ass, but I’m going to be there for her from now on.”
“Good.” Ruby patted his chest. “Good luck. I’m going to the waiting room. I have to call Quint. Tell Cordy I’ll be here waiting.”
“Ruby.”
She looked back at him.
“Thank you. For everything.”
His sister-in-law nodded and then walked away.
Chance opened the door, ready for what came next. Or at least he thought he was.
Cordy was propped up in one of those awful hospital beds, her eyes watering and her chin wobbling. Shit, she’d thought he wasn’t coming.
“What took you so long?” she demanded.
“Had to close out my tab.”
His hand shook as he took hers, the one that didn’t have a needle stuck in it. Why did they have to do that? She was wired up like something was wrong, an IV in her hand, some monitor strapped around her belly, the hospital gown slipping off her shoulder. It terrified him, but he couldn’t let her know that.
“You only had water,” she said.
“Jack charges extra for water. Says drinking it brings down the atmosphere of the Red Dog.”
“That place couldn’t get any lower.” She swallowed. “Don’t tell Jack I said that.”
“That was my last visit there for the rest of my life.” He squeezed her hand. “How you doing? You need anything? Water? Food? Are they letting you have food?”
Cordy shook her head. “They won’t let me eat. I can chew on ice. But I hate ice.” Her gaze searched his. “What do you mean you’re not going back there?”
“Don’t worry about it. We need to focus on you. Has the doctor been in? Have they checked you? Where’s your bag?”
“Quint’s coming with it. Ruby asked him to bring it.”
Thank God. Chance owed Ruby big time. “I texted Rye. He’s going to bring Iggy to his house.”
“Poor Iggy. He has no idea what’s going on.” Tears started to sneak out of her winter-green eyes. “I’m going to ruin his life with this.”
“Shh.” Chance stroked her hair. “He’s going to love the baby. That’s a family dog right there, I can tell. Do you want me to braid your hair so it’s not in your eyes?”
“You know how?”
“No, but I’ve got the internet. And listen, when Rye gets home with Iggy, I’ll have him do a video call. That’ll make Iggy feel better, hearing and seeing you.”
She blinked, splashing tears onto her cheeks. “Thanks. I’m sorry, I’m not being very brave.”
Christ, how did she manage to turn his heart inside out like that?
“Cordy.” He could barely choke out her name. “You’re about to have a damn baby. You’re the bravest person I know.”
He wiped her tears away with his thumb. Couldn’t she see that? And she’d been ready to do this all alone, which was even braver. He’d been a damn coward, and she’d been magnificent.
When his thumb touched her wet cheek, time slowed. It felt like a massive wave was pulling him under, a wave he’d seen coming from miles away but never thought would hit him. Chance went down and down and down, until his mouth, nose, lungs, all of him was filled with this feeling.
He was in love with Cordelia Grace Johnson.
This wasn’t any kind of I love you like a friend or like a friend with benefits or even like a sister.
This was full-on Kessal love madness. Chance suddenly understood his father, his uncles, his brother, and even Jesse from long ago. Because he was ready to run out into a blizzard to catch her a zebra before he started on that second porch she wanted.
But all that seemed easy compared to what he had to do now—watch her go through the most dangerous thing a woman could do. And he had to be calm and stoic and never admit how insanely in love with her he was.
Chance was well and truly screwed.
The shining misery of Cordy’s tears wrenched him out of his thoughts. All right, he didn’t have to walk into a blizzard; he only had to do what he’d already promised.
Cordy sniffled. “I guess… I guess I was freaking out.” Her shoulders relaxed. “I’m feeling better.” She managed to smile at him. “I have to tell you, in case?—”
Chance laid a finger on her lips. If she spoke any of that out loud, she’d undo him. “Nope. Not hearing any in cases. Everything is going to be fine . ”
When he lifted his finger, she said, “I just wanted to say I’m glad you answered the ad. I couldn’t do this with anyone else.”
For a moment, his throat threatened to close. “I’m glad it was me too.”
Then they both got down to the hard work ahead of them.