13. Helen #3
A blue and violet veil swept over the flame-orange horizon. Mellow pockets of buttery yellow and pale red thinned as sunset claimed the sky. Most called it the magical hour, but the only magical thing was the angel in a silver dress sweeping across the dancefloor with her small cluster of friends.
No surprise when those sharp, striking blue eyes found me lurking in the bushes.
She whispered to her friends and slipped away from their clutches and away from the overcrowded outdoor dance floor.
The DJ leapt into the next fast-paced song, and I dipped further into the outskirts, deeper into the darkness.
“Drake?” she whispered, giggling at the elation from dancing. I watched her push through the bushes, laughing and cursing in French as she batted leaves away. “Where are you?”
“I’m here.” She followed the sound of my voice to a secluded alcove. “Come here, little kitten, follow the big bad wolf to the edge of the dark woods.”
Monty laughed again, stumbling into the shadows. At that distance, the music grew muffled, the sounds of other noisy students seeming so far away. I heard her hitched breath with perfect clarity when my arm belted out and wrapped around her waist.
A peal of bubbling giggles vented from her glossy, painted lips as I spun her around.
Hidden as we were, there was no one to gossip or gape as I turned Monty, dancing with her as I wished I could.
I wanted to dance with her out on that dancefloor, in the open, where everyone would see and know.
See her in my arms. Know she was mine as much as I was hers.
The next song rippled through the air, slower and romantic.
I pulled Monty close, savoring the feel of her in my arms, against my chest. Her hands fell to my waist, and she rested her head over my heart.
Could she hear how painfully it beat against my ribs?
Could she hear it beating out the rhythm of her name?
“Why did you come?” she hummed. We swayed along to the music, gladly enveloped in one another.
I pressed a kiss to the top of her head, careful of the delicate style of her hair that likely took Brooke hours to wrangle. A wispy smile curled her lips and her lashes fluttered. The red hue of her cheeks mirrored cherries, and I wondered if her lips tasted as sweet.
“Had to come annoy you, didn’t I?”
She rested her chin on my chest and that sweet, pointed glare hit me like a dagger to the heart.
“When aren’t you?” She rolled her eyes. I wanted to dive headfirst into those blue seas and drown. Maybe I was already drowning. I couldn’t breathe.
I kissed the tip of her nose.
“I know. I’m insufferable.”
She hummed again. Eyes fluttering shut even as she beamed at me. Smiling as if I were her entire world. “Oh, I think I suffer you well enough.”
Damned if I did and damned if I didn’t. Either way, we were doomed. I heard the adoration in her voice, the pure, unaltered joy, and I wanted to bask in her. With her light and her attention, she’d been the balm on my fractured soul.
When the silence stretched thin, like gauze on a weeping wound, she reared back. Those knowing eyes read me too damn well.
“What’s wrong?”
And right then, I wanted to tell her everything.
To explain how exhausted and broken I was.
How the decision I needed to make would tear us apart, and I hated it.
Even in my dreams I saw her, but I woke up tired and afraid for our future.
I wanted to tell her about the dark waves dragging me under a drowning tide and the rope around my neck that looked like my father’s hands.
Instead, I held her lovely face in my hands and pressed a tender kiss to her lips. She tasted sweet, as she always did.
“Nothing. You’re just so beautiful.”
The stars twinkled in her eyes; silver flecks hidden in the blue. She was a warm sunrise in winter, and I was the frost thawing under her power. I’d melt for her. Maybe I already had through all the years she’d bewitched me, charmed me, stunned the good sense right out of me.
“Drake.” Her soft, breathy voice carried promises I wanted to covet. “I wanted to tell you that I lo?—”
I cut her off with a harsh, soul searing kiss. The bruising kind that she would feel for days. I wanted her to feel me and remember everything we shared. Even when it hurt, even when she’d hate me, I wanted her to taste me on her tongue.
As much as I wanted to hear the words balancing on the tip of her tongue, I couldn’t. If I heard them, I wouldn’t do what needed to be done for both our sakes. I’d wrap her up and throw her over my shoulder and run away from everything.
She couldn’t be mine. Our families wouldn’t allow it. And I couldn’t be hers. Not without endangering her.
“Hey, let me get you a drink, Monty. You look a bit warm.” She blinked dazedly up at me, kiss-dunk and flushed anew with arousal. Lingering would be another mistake, despite how badly I wanted to take her against the wall.
Now or never.
“Oh, alright. I’ll wait here for you.”
“I’ll be right back.” She giggled when I kissed the back of her hand. Something necessary for my moral compass fractured in my chest when I turned my back on her. And something vital broke in us both when I didn’t go back for her.