Chapter 3
Chapter Three
Sydney
Moving through the back of the rhino house, I turn toward the exit to the boardwalk where the patrons are all waiting.
It’s my turn to interact with the visitors at the zoo, answering their questions and teaching them about this highly intelligent but extremely endangered animal.
I always get nervous before I do these even though it’s been over a month since I started here.
I worry about someone recognizing me or me saying something they won’t understand.
Before I open the door, I stop and take a deep breath.
I’m so ready for the weekend. I need a break.
I haven’t been sleeping well, and I’m exhausted.
I smooth down my khaki shirt and black cargo pants.
My hair is up in a bun to keep it from getting in the way or dragging through things it shouldn’t.
Opening the door, I step out and move to the edge of the exhibit where people are looking down at the rhino.
There is a small crowd consisting mostly of parents with their young ones.
I can’t wait until Mari is old enough to enjoy coming here.
I step to the side of the group, next to the sign detailing our new rhino.
“Hello, everyone. Welcome to the Nashville Zoo and our new southern white rhino exhibit. I’m Sydney, and I’m one of the lucky mammal zoologists who gets to work with Umi.
I’d like to teach you about this amazing, beautiful animal.
But first, does anyone have any questions? ” I stop and look at everyone.
The kids are looking at Umi, while the parents look at me. My eyes land on a pair of eyes I recognize, and I smile at her.
“How many are there left in the world?” Wrenn asks, and I look down at the wagon she’s pulling and see a pretty little girl with long dark pigtails watching me.
“Currently there are about fifteen to twenty thousand of the southern white rhinos like Umi, but there are only two of the northern white rhinos left, and they are both females. There are about six thousand black rhinos. Just over four thousand greater one-horned rhinos, while there are only fifty Javan and about thirty-four Sumatran in Indonesia. As you can tell, several rhino species are critically endangered.”
Every day I look up the numbers so that I’m on point when we have these talks.
I feel like everyone should know how serious endangerment is.
How fragile life is for these beautiful animals.
And it’s all because of humans. If we could stop the poaching of their horns and hunting them, they wouldn’t be endangered.
“Why are there so few?” another woman asks. Her hand rests on the shoulder of a boy.
“Because rhinos are hunted for their horns. In countries such as China, rhino horn is used medicinally,” I answer. Her son looks away from Umi and up at me.
“So, their horn is like antlers on deer, but special?”
I lean down to the boy and point at Umi.
“Actually, a rhino horn is not the same as deer antlers. Antlers are bone, and they are shed with time. Rhino horn is made of keratin and is never shed. It keeps growing. Did you know that keratin is the same thing as your fingernails?” I show him my nails.
“In many cultures, rhino horn is used in their medicine, and some people just want the horns as displays.”
“Does it hurt to cut them off?” the little boy asks.
I force a smile because I know the answer will break his little heart.
“No, it doesn’t hurt, but they kill the rhino to get the horn because they can’t just walk up to it and cut it off.”
“That’s not nice.”
The little boy looks up at his mother, devastated, and I want to console him, tell him it will be alright, but I know it won’t.
There are too many evil people out there who will hunt these animals just because they think they can.
I shift on my ankle as I remember how dangerous it really is out there.
“No, it isn’t.” I shake my head as his eyes fill with tears.
“Are elephant tusks the same thing?” another little girl, a bit older than the boy, asks. I stand and look at her.
“Actually, elephants have ivory for their tusks.”
“Why do they kill them then?”
“Because lots of countries and places like to carve the ivory.” I smile at the little girl, sad that they are learning at a young age that not all people are nice, but education is important for change.
I knew when I took this job that I would be making a difference in a different way than I did before.
“When I lived in Africa, we would follow the elephants as they trekked from one country or area to another. We’d educate the villages and locals on how to keep elephants out of their fields, and we helped by studying them.”
“You lived with the elephants?” both the boy and girl say at the same time.
The little girl with Wrenn looks up at me from her wagon with awe in her eyes. I smile down at her.
“I lived in a tent a lot of times, but yes, we were around the elephants and rhinos. We’d help with finding poachers and keeping them away.”
“Wow,” the kids all exclaim.
They continue to ask me questions, but not about Umi, more about camping and my expeditions. After a bit, they all move on except for Wrenn, whose waddle is very pronounced as she moves toward me. I see Aries standing not far behind her, as if he’s worried she’s going to give birth at any moment.
“Are you hiding from me?” She smiles. She’s got me now.
I think about that night three weeks ago.
I fell asleep in Tucker’s arms after my panic attack.
I remember him trying to calm me. I remember so much about that night that I would like to forget.
I didn’t even wake him up when I left in the middle of the night.
I snuck out without telling Wrenn or Drea that I was leaving.
There were only a few people around when I left.
I had an Uber pick me up out front, and I ran like a chickenshit because I knew I couldn’t give him or any man what they’d want.
I’m broken. I’ve done things no one could imagine.
I turn so she won’t see me lie to her, because the truth is, I was hiding from her.
I read her text messages. She said he’d sent her a text saying I was with him.
She’s tried calling me. My mom even cornered me, trying to get me to spill about what happened.
But I wouldn’t tell her, and I won’t tell anyone.
What I shared with Tucker has to remain between us, because I know it won’t ever go anywhere. But I loved it so much. To be held and to feel safe for the first time in over a year was more than I could have hoped for. He made me feel whole.
“No.” I shrug and pick up trash someone missed putting in the can. “Well, I need to get back to work. It was good to see you.” I try to walk off, but she reaches out and grips my arm gently.
“Syd, I’m not mad at you for running off.
I don’t know what happened. I just know that you were with Poseidon.
Why don’t you come over for dinner tomorrow night and we can hang out?
Of course, my husband will be there and maybe a couple of the guys from the club, but nothing big. Bring Mari,” she implores.
I feel bad for avoiding her. She is one of my oldest friends and has been there for me lately when other friends have left me or are too busy. I’ll just have to be firm with Tucker that nothing can happen between us. Mari is my priority.
I nod and my lips tip up slightly. “Okay. What time?”
“How about six? That way we have a couple of hours before Mari goes to bed and you’ll have time to get home from work.”
“Sounds good. So, who is this cutie?” I point down to the little girl in the wagon.
“I’m Summer.”
“She’s Killan and Jody’s little girl, my cousin and his wife.”
“Well, hello, Summer. I’m Sydney.”
“Do you pet the elepants?” she asks me with a smile.
“I do. Maybe someday Wrenn can bring you back and I’ll take you in to see them. We can’t right now.”
“Can we?” She looks up at Wrenn.
“Yeah,” Wrenn responds, then turns to me. “Not until after this baby comes, though.” She chuckles. “I feel like I’m going to blow any day with as big as I’m getting. Okay, we’ll let you get back to work.”
I wave at them until they disappear, then I look over at the teenager who has been doing his community service here. He waves at me.
“Hello, Syd.” He calls me by a nickname I didn’t give him permission to use.
I shake my head at the kid before I wave back. I know he’s attempting to flirt with me in his young mind.
“Hello, Jace.”
He walks toward me. He shakes around his head, his longer wavy hair catches the light, and something about the kid looks very familiar, but I can’t place it.
“Want to grab some burgers after you get off this evening?”
Yep, the kid thinks I’m into him.
“How old are you, Jace?”
He leans back like I offended him, then props himself against the fence and folds his arms over his still-developing chest. He’s a foot taller than me.
“Age is just a number, Syd. I like my women mature. I’d never ask your age.”
I laugh hard. At first, he pauses, then joins in with me.
“I’m not trying to hurt your feelings, kiddo. But let’s be honest. If I had kids before college, they’d be your age. Besides, I’m not into dating right now. I have my own baby to take care of.”
He’s taken aback by my confession about Mari.
“I didn’t know you had a kid. How old is it?”
“She’s five months old.” I glance over and see his supervisor walking toward us. “You better get back to work before you get into trouble.” I don’t know why he’s doing community service, but the kid seems like one of the good ones.
His head swings back as she approaches us. “Yeah, I guess I better. But I don’t care how old you are, Sydney. I like you. If you want to go as friends, we can do that too.”
“Thank you for making me feel good, but again, I’m not dating.” I pause, and an image of Tucker flashes through my mind. “Besides, I need more friends than romantic interests. How about we have lunch together the next time you work?”